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Sivy
12-04-2003, 09:39 AM
www.laughlab.co.uk have been conducting the largest ever study on humour.
One of the study's main goals is to uncover the funniest joke in the world. So far, the joke that has tickled the most funnybones is:


Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes wakes Watson up. "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce." Watson says, "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life." Holmes replied: "No Watson, you idiot, somebody stole our tent!"


so is that the funniest joke ever? you decide

IG-64
12-04-2003, 10:26 AM
no, they need to do it for americans only

BawBag™
12-04-2003, 10:30 AM
Originally posted by Siv
www.laughlab.co.uk have been conducting the largest ever study on humour.
One of the study's main goals is to uncover the funniest joke in the world. So far, the joke that has tickled the most funnybones is:


Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes wakes Watson up. "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce." Watson says, "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life." Holmes replied: "No Watson, you idiot, somebody stole our tent!"


so is that the funniest joke ever? you decide
Well, you know what they say about the old ones. They're the oldest.

To be honest a newer joke is more likely to make me laugh than one I've heard before......... still a cracker though. :p

Sivy
12-04-2003, 10:30 AM
no, they need to do it for americans only

well that one was the overall winner

this was the one that won in the US...

A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer. His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.” The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.”

leXX
12-04-2003, 10:32 AM
Originally posted by Siv

so is that the funniest joke ever? you decide

You know, I didn't even break a smile!

IG-64
12-04-2003, 10:39 AM
hey, siv, I have seen this before and I clicked "no" as soon as I opened the thread and was suprised to see that you had second place on there and the joke wasn't even complete. First place wasn't that funny but second was not really hilarious either, I will post the real winner and second place:


First Place:

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?"


Second Place:

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
"I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes" replies Watson.
"And what do you deduce from that?"
Watson ponders for a minute.
"Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes is silent for a moment. "Watson, you idiot!" he says. "Someone has stolen our tent!"

to see these go to http://www.laughlab.co.uk/winner.html

leXX
12-04-2003, 10:43 AM
Originally posted by IG-64
First Place:

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?"
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Ok, that one was funnier. :D Still, no way near the best joke ever!

Sivy
12-04-2003, 10:43 AM
thats odd, according to this (http://www.nature.com/nsu/011227/011227-1.html) that one won. perhaps that wasn't the final result *shrugs*

Hermie
12-04-2003, 11:23 AM
I voted no, but my internett lagged, so it said I voted yes…

I belive I have posted some funnier in the joke thread in joes forum (valley of the jedi) (http://www.spacewars.farstate.net/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8) go there and judge for yourself :D btw, sgin in for that forum too!!!! I bet its a pluss im my book for my become a mod campain if I recruit people. :D all I need now is 18 more post before I can send in my request

Pie™
12-04-2003, 12:07 PM
Originally posted by Herminator_64
I belive I have posted some funnier in the joke thread in joes forum (valley of the jedi) (http://www.spacewars.farstate.net/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8) go there and judge for yourself :D
I agree on all your points...
those jokes are old :)

Sam Fisher
12-04-2003, 01:43 PM
Well, those weren't very funny, only the hunter one was funnier than the others.

Meh.

Alegis
12-04-2003, 03:27 PM
my favourite, (it's better told than read) (sorry for the spelling, it's originally a joke in dutch)

John is walking along the avenue, and sees in a window of a shop green socks, only 3 bucks. Green socks? GREEN SOCKS! John races home, he would sell his soul for those green socks!
'DADDY DADDY!' 'mmmyeah?' 'DADDY PLEASE CAN I HAVE 3 BUCKS FOR GREEN SOCKS?????'
'3 bucks? Hell no! But you can get one buck if you repair the lawn mower'
John screws the lawn mower open, messes a bit around with the wires and closes everything
'HERE DADDY!'
John gets his dollar, and right after that his father wants to mow the lawn, but gets electrocuted and dies. Meanwhile John is in front of his mother
'MOMMY MOMMY!!!! CAN I HAVE 2 BUCKS FOR GREEN SOCKS???'
'What? Hell no! But you can have one buck if you repair the ironing thing
John lesses a bit around with the wires, bam closes everything and gets his dollar. Mom tries to iron some clothes but ZZZZAPPP gets electrocuted and dies. Meanwhile John found his sister
'SIIIIIIIIISSS! CAN I HAVE ONE BUCK PLEASE PLEASE FOR GREEN SOCKS????'
'Hell no! You owe me another 5 bucks! But i'll give you one if you repair my lady shave k?'
John opens the damn thing, messes a bit with the wires and hands it over to his sister. Sister tries it but ZAAAPPPPP gets electrocuted and dies.
'YEEEHAW I GOT ME 3 BUCKS!!!!!' John screamed out as someone rang the doorbell, he runs downstairs and opens the door to find a penguin in the doorway. and what does the penguin say? (guess)
NOTHING, BECAUSE PENGUINS CAN'T TALK! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Pie™
12-04-2003, 03:35 PM
:rofl: :lol: ahahahhaha!!
it's a penguin!!! :D
didn't see that coming :D
how do u come up with this stuff!!!!:confused:

Jared
12-04-2003, 04:34 PM
Originally posted by Siv
www.laughlab.co.uk have been conducting the largest ever study on humour.
One of the study's main goals is to uncover the funniest joke in the world. So far, the joke that has tickled the most funnybones is:


Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. Sometime in the middle of the night Holmes wakes Watson up. "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce." Watson says, "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life." Holmes replied: "No Watson, you idiot, somebody stole our tent!"


so is that the funniest joke ever? you decide


hahahaha......

it was a good laugh, but not the best I have ever heard;)

IG-64
12-04-2003, 04:48 PM
Originally posted by Alegis Gensan
my favourite, (it's better told than read) (sorry for the spelling, it's originally a joke in dutch)

John is walking along the avenue, and sees in a window of a shop green socks, only 3 bucks. Green socks? GREEN SOCKS! John races home, he would sell his soul for those green socks!
'DADDY DADDY!' 'mmmyeah?' 'DADDY PLEASE CAN I HAVE 3 BUCKS FOR GREEN SOCKS?????'
'3 bucks? Hell no! But you can get one buck if you repair the lawn mower'
John screws the lawn mower open, messes a bit around with the wires and closes everything
'HERE DADDY!'
John gets his dollar, and right after that his father wants to mow the lawn, but gets electrocuted and dies. Meanwhile John is in front of his mother
'MOMMY MOMMY!!!! CAN I HAVE 2 BUCKS FOR GREEN SOCKS???'
'What? Hell no! But you can have one buck if you repair the ironing thing
John lesses a bit around with the wires, bam closes everything and gets his dollar. Mom tries to iron some clothes but ZZZZAPPP gets electrocuted and dies. Meanwhile John found his sister
'SIIIIIIIIISSS! CAN I HAVE ONE BUCK PLEASE PLEASE FOR GREEN SOCKS????'
'Hell no! You owe me another 5 bucks! But i'll give you one if you repair my lady shave k?'
John opens the damn thing, messes a bit with the wires and hands it over to his sister. Sister tries it but ZAAAPPPPP gets electrocuted and dies.
'YEEEHAW I GOT ME 3 BUCKS!!!!!' John screamed out as someone rang the doorbell, he runs downstairs and opens the door to find a penguin in the doorway. and what does the penguin say? (guess)
NOTHING, BECAUSE PENGUINS CAN'T TALK! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

i'm just not gettin it

Pie™
12-04-2003, 05:01 PM
Originally posted by IG-64
i'm just not gettin it
the point is that there is no point... :D
a so called 'stupid joke'
it rocks

Alegis
12-04-2003, 06:25 PM
It's helluva lot better when you built up a climax in your voice and enthousiasm towards the end like: and there was a PENGUIN THERE, AND GUESS WHAT IT SAID? and after NOTHING laugh as hard as you can, when i first heard this one (4 or 5 years ago) i was laughing for a week (really, at sudden points i'd remember the joke and start laughing out loud)

IG-64
12-04-2003, 06:30 PM
I usually like pointless jokes but that one just didn't work out in text. I can see how that would be funny

Pie™
12-04-2003, 06:32 PM
i actually liked it, seriously, my kind of humour :D

Hermie
12-04-2003, 06:35 PM
this time I actually Laughed Out Loud :D great joke :thumb1:

RoxStar
12-04-2003, 08:01 PM
I think the funniest one ever is the golf one.

RockerD
12-04-2003, 08:15 PM
I think monty python's joke that ended world war 2 is the funniest
dont read this because you may spontaneously combust :p
My dog had no nose......
How does it smell?
Awful!

DarkLord60
12-04-2003, 10:07 PM
Its funny but not the funniest.