PDA

View Full Version : things that can be learnt from the star wars movies


Sivy
01-22-2004, 10:47 AM
-Never trust men in dark helmets.
- Sometimes, you've just gotta do something that seems totally suicidal.
- Always check the background of people you want to get intimately involved with, they may be your relatives.
- You may have family members in surprisingly high positions.
- Before you kill someone make sure they aren't your father.
- Know the difference between power socket and a computer terminal.
- THIS one goes there, and THAT one goes there!
- No matter how tasty that hunk of meat looks on that pole on that forest moon, don't grab it; it's probably a trap. (Or: when you see a piece of dead meat impaled on a stake in the woods, LEAVE IT!!!!!!!!!)
- Cute, cuddly, widdle teddy bears usually will eat you alive unless you can prove you're a god.
- Take a good look around for bad guys before looking into your binoculars.
- Fire on a rebel base *before* they blow up your space station.
- Don't assume a senior citizen is weak and frail; they may zap you with lightning bolts.
- You will find many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view
- Your eyes deceive you, don't trust them.
- The Bad Guys can't hit the broad side of a barn.
- But, "Only Imperial Storm Troopers are so precise"
- It's never my fault.
- Never judge anything by its size.
- There are those who are less forgiving than Darth Vader.
- Always let a Wookie win.
- Never cast your lightsaber away, you just might need it
- It not a good idea to follow up on a vision while meditating
- Always pay off your debts in a hurry
- If your in it just for the money, you might blow your chances with the princess
- If some yells out "It's a trap!" then believe them
- Walk in single file to hide your numbers.
- When wearing stormtrooper armor, remember to make sure the door's completely open before going through it.
- You'll always have a bad feeling about something
- Don't park in asteroids
- Never say "watch this" when dealing with a hyperdrive
- Don't shoot out the controls to a bridge BEFORE you cross the bridge
- If you want to keep your friends warm, shove them inside a dead animal!!
- If you run a military academy, go over how to deal with small, furry opponents.
- Whining about power converters makes you look like an idiot.
- Dead animals usually smell worse on the INSIDE
- Never assume responsibility if it means you're likely to be choked to death.
- When your Tauntaun smells something, it's usually a good time to high-tail it outta there.
- When someone tells you to eject, it's probably a good idea.
- You really should fire on lifepods whether there are signs of life or not
- If you ever build a throne room, NEVER put a great big shaft leading to a big nuclear reactor right in the center of the room.
- Don't judge someone by their bad grammar
- An entire planet could have only one climate
-. Everything has a weakness, it's just a matter of exploiting it
* Emperor - overconfident
* Luke - friends
* Death Star - thermal exhaust port
* Stormtroopers - Ewoks
* Star Destroyers - bridge deflector shields
* Darth Vader - compassion for his kids
* Leia - smugglers
* Chewie - dead animals hanging from trees
- Beware those heart-to-heart talks with Dad. One of you might end up losing an appendage.
- never say "where are you taking this---THING---?" b/c the next thing you know, you're flying across the room.
- No matter how cool a guy's helmet looks, push him off a high place and he'll scream like a girl.
- Cool costume + Bare minimum of screen time = Eternal popularity
- Sticks and Stones WILL Break your bones.
- Nothing can happen without a Bothan spy dying
- Don't use targeting computers; rely on the voicesd in your head
- with good camouflage no one will see the big reflective gold droid you brought along.
- Take an R-2 unit with you...its better than any Swiss army knife.
353. A little one-on-one with Dad can cost you an arm or a leg - literally.
- Bounty Hunters turn into Alderaanian princesses when you kiss them.
- When all else fails....jump!

ExcelsioN
01-22-2004, 07:45 PM
Thats a hell of a long list - but funny.

I like that. :D (With the voice of that woman from one of the Simpsons episodes. :rolleyes: )

Alegis
01-22-2004, 07:52 PM
A real lesson: "Do or do not, there is no try"

Though the ' If you ever build a throne room, NEVER put a great big shaft leading to a big nuclear reactor right in the center of the room' is very wise too

Prime
01-22-2004, 08:21 PM
- Picking up power converters = wasting time with friends
- Having a bad transmitter is an exceptable excuse for a stormtrooper not being at their post
- Shooting precision is rated on a vastly lower scale in galaxies far, far away
- Do not underestimate your opponants chances, especially if they are rebels or are a part of any sort of alliance
- Clones are immensely superior to droids
- Garbage shoots never lead to better situations
- rooms made of ice and snow are supposed to be freezing
- The appropriate response to someone telling you they love you is to say, "I know"
- Wookies are not taken into consideration by starship designers

Mex
01-22-2004, 08:38 PM
- Never, I mean never open up a TaunTaun. And I mean never.
- Before watching Episode 6 again make sure that you have earplugs when Luke is around.
- Droids can still have love without privates.

Pie™
01-22-2004, 09:40 PM
- Never put your shield reactors in the easiest accesible place around
- Never use mechanized bridges inside your own base
- Never hide in the garbage
- Always trust the oldest and wisest green little guy in the galaxy
- Don't let Tuskens steal your momma :p
- Riding on huge, fat pigs impresses girls a lot
- When you have a huge space station, never leave the one garbage shaft leading to the core unguarded
- Watch out for blue-skinned punkers
- Never build a giant hatch to a monster cage right below your throne
- Princesses in gold bikinis make great slaves :naughty:

Ragnos
01-23-2004, 10:17 AM
-Dont ever save a Gungans life, ur gonna regret it(just ask Qui-Gon)

edit: oh cr*p im a Gungan grunt! :(

STTCT
01-23-2004, 10:29 AM
they didn't learnt you to spell huh?

Glaive v.1
01-23-2004, 12:26 PM
Great Lists Guys.....and girls

ZBomber
01-23-2004, 01:32 PM
Originally posted by STTCT
they didn't learnt you to spell huh?

No, me fail 2 grade english. :)


Some of my favorites:
- No matter how cool a guy's helmet looks, push him off a high place and he'll scream like a girl.
- Garbage shoots never lead to better situations
- When wearing stormtrooper armor, remember to make sure the door's completely open before going through it.
- You'll always have a bad feeling about something
- Don't park in asteroids
- The Bad Guys can't hit the broad side of a barn.
- But, "Only Imperial Storm Troopers are so precise"
- It's never my fault.

:D

Prime
01-23-2004, 06:52 PM
- Stormtroopers can't hit anything because they "can't see a thing" in their helmets.
- Ancient weapons and hokey religions are no match for a good blaster at your side.
- Never take a restraining bolt off a droid you just bought.
- Always look straight ahead when driving a speeder bike.
- A tribe of 3 foot primitive bears can defeat an entire legion of Imperial stormtroopers, making one realize how pathetic the rebels at Hoth were.
- Being slowly digested over 1000 years is not seen as a pleasant way to go.
- Holding a thermal detonator makes you seem fearless and inventive, but apparently not stupid.
- Rancor keepers love their Rancors.
- Slave dancers do not love Rancors.
- When a Jedi Knight says this is your last chance, it probably is.
- Councillor ships should always have ambassadors.
- The stun setting on your blaster is an excellent tool for capturing princesses.
- If the Sith Lord you are dueling can hold you off with only one hand on his saber, you are in big trouble.
- Nice Sith Lords will sit down to dinner with you before taking you prisoner.
- Swamp monsters do not like the taste of droids.
- There is always a bigger fish.
- Always trust your fate to boys you hardly know.
- When a Jedi Master says, "drop," you probably should.
- When A Jedi Master says, "stay in that cockpit," you probably shouldn't.
- Sith Lords are not concerned with asteroids.
- If a Sith Lord thinks you are as clumsy as you are stupid, don't, repeat don't answer the videophone.
- Being lower in rank than said Mr. Clumsystupid means your odds of promotion are quite good.
- if at first your superweapon fails, try, try again.