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View Full Version : The "One post story" thread. It's great!


Fealiks
09-18-2004, 03:21 PM
This a great game that I posted ages ago once as pHILBRUSH.
Right, It goes like this:
*Ahem*

One person says one word, then a next says another ect. ect.
BUT, every three posts, we keep track, like so; {first dude} there.
{other dude}was. {next dude} a. *two spaces down* STORY SO FAR: one there was a _____________________________
Get it? Then I shall begin: Once...

Sivy
09-28-2004, 03:19 AM
don't do a 'one word' one, they take forever to get anywhere and people lost interest to quickly. do a one or two line one. people can be more creative with that.

i'll start...


Out of the darkness he saw the little flash of light. That was the sign. He thumbed the safety catch off… it was now or never.

Alien426
09-28-2004, 05:58 AM
He rethumbed the safety catch on, deciding that he could never do it. Not ever.

Sivy
09-28-2004, 06:48 AM
His hands began to shake and he started to sweat uncontrollably. He knew that by giving up without a fight, they would win.

Fealiks
09-28-2004, 08:50 AM
But, he stuck by his first decision and went off too eat a burger instead, but little did he know that...

Sivy
09-29-2004, 04:50 AM
... the burger had been exposed to gamma rays and toxic waste, mutating it into a grotesque psychotic meaty monster.

Kryllith
09-29-2004, 06:11 AM
"Do I get fries with this?" he muttered under his breath, once again releasing the safety catch on his... wait, that's not a gun. Who puts a safety catch on a toothbrush?

Kryllith

Fealiks
09-30-2004, 11:02 AM
He tried to brush, wondering why the safety catch was there... BAM! er... nothing. He later found that the safety catch was merely a piece of meat :nut:

Sivy
10-04-2004, 03:28 AM
Armed with just a safety catch-less toothbrush, he prepared himself for battle with the mutated burger monster. Suddenly a thought came to him. what he needed was a

Evil Dark Jedi
10-04-2004, 03:29 AM
person who could help him defeat the monster. So he asked the person next to him to help him. They then

Joshi
10-04-2004, 03:47 AM
Well, someone should do a story so far thing.

Ahem...
STORY SO FAR!
Out of the darkness he saw the little flash of light. That was the sign. He thumbed the safety catch off… it was now or never.

He rethumbed the safety catch on, deciding that he could never do it. Not ever.

His hands began to shake and he started to sweat uncontrollably. He knew that by giving up without a fight, they would win.

But, he stuck by his first decision and went off too eat a burger instead, but little did he know that...

... the burger had been exposed to gamma rays and toxic waste, mutating it into a grotesque psychotic meaty monster.

"Do I get fries with this?" he muttered under his breath, once again releasing the safety catch on his... wait, that's not a gun. Who puts a safety catch on a toothbrush?

He tried to brush, wondering why the safety catch was there... BAM! er... nothing. He later found that the safety catch was merely a piece of meat

Armed with just a safety catch-less toothbrush, he prepared himself for battle with the mutated burger monster. Suddenly a thought came to him. what he needed was a

person who could help him defeat the monster. So he asked the person next to him to help him. They then...

and now my contribution

...flew into action, but accidentaly hit a wall because the universe seems to also have a sense of humour. But the wall wasn't a wall, but actually turned out to be...

Sivy
10-04-2004, 04:25 AM
marzipan. "what the hell is going on??!" shouted the man in frustration. little did he know that things were about to get weirder...

Evil Dark Jedi
10-07-2004, 03:16 PM
when the hambuger monster sperated and made two. He got up after the 1st hambuger monster blew him down...........

Fealiks
10-12-2004, 01:08 PM
wait he thought to himself, I've still got to do the thing that sivy ahem, uh I had came for in the begining. The burgers backed away knowing that this was important. "Grandma, he said " I'm a --...

Sivy
10-13-2004, 02:02 AM
"i'm in love with oddly shaped fruit and that’s why grandpa got suckered into this. but don't worry, i'll get him out! no mutant burgers are going to stop me!" he then picked his up toothbrush and left.

Fealiks
10-13-2004, 02:03 PM
Our young hero, Ick Van Shneidenheid II, was off to his best freind's house, he had a carboot sale there and had heard that there were som Geeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrate toothbrushes there, so he bought the laser sonicare one for £250 (yeah, ££££!!!) and went to Manbroom lambbad to talk about the...

The Bard
11-11-2004, 12:44 PM
...one thing that could probably kill a fuc..... coff coff ...mutating hamburger....(drum rolls)....THE ZEROFASCINATIONINSTATION 5000 whith safety thingy et all. This weapon was devised by the master minds of the CIA, for the attack of the mutant lobsters in the Vegas sub and....

Fealiks
11-12-2004, 09:33 AM
....university of Liverpool which are currently updating the ad shown in....

The Bard
11-12-2004, 10:27 AM
L.A. The Person who selled this to our hero was a person whom knowledge of the secret matters were very well known to him, like the flying bicycles that the bushadmnistration is trying to invent or the sub-narotiomanism system that nobody knows what the fu it is!

Fealiks
11-12-2004, 12:08 PM
Ick Van Shneidenheid II then went off to blockbusters to buy porn porn. Damn, I mean er... sex videos. NO, erm, Die Hard, yeah he rented Die Hard he kept it under his bed because...

The Bard
11-12-2004, 03:10 PM
at the middle of the night he had the urge to watch Bruce Willis's tight arse. Then he kept the lethal weapon that could kill mutating Hamburgers under his bed also because tomorrow he would be hunting them!So when he fell asleep he dreamt of....

Fealiks
11-13-2004, 09:32 AM
...Brucee's lap dancing skills in a room surrounded by red velvet curtains. He woke up not only to realize that baby oil has a new use, but also...

The Bard
11-14-2004, 07:35 AM
That it was already noon. So he picked up the lethal weapon that could kill Mutant Burgers an went out for the hunt. He started ....

Fealiks
11-14-2004, 12:03 PM
okay, not for a while. Here goes.

STORY SO FAR!
Out of the darkness he saw the little flash of light. That was the sign. He thumbed the safety catch off… it was now or never.

He rethumbed the safety catch on, deciding that he could never do it. Not ever.

His hands began to shake and he started to sweat uncontrollably. He knew that by giving up without a fight, they would win.

But, he stuck by his first decision and went off too eat a burger instead, but little did he know that...

... the burger had been exposed to gamma rays and toxic waste, mutating it into a grotesque psychotic meaty monster.

"Do I get fries with this?" he muttered under his breath, once again releasing the safety catch on his... wait, that's not a gun. Who puts a safety catch on a toothbrush?

He tried to brush, wondering why the safety catch was there... BAM! er... nothing. He later found that the safety catch was merely a piece of meat

Armed with just a safety catch-less toothbrush, he prepared himself for battle with the mutated burger monster. Suddenly a thought came to him. what he needed was a

person who could help him defeat the monster. So he asked the person next to him to help him. They then...

...flew into action, but accidentaly hit a wall because the universe seems to also have a sense of humour. But the wall wasn't a wall, but actually turned out to be...
marzipan. "what the hell is going on??!" shouted the man in frustration. little did he know that things were about to get weirder...
when the hambuger monster sperated and made two. He got up after the 1st hambuger monster blew him down...........

wait he thought to himself, I've still got to do the thing that sivy ahem, uh I had came for in the begining. The burgers backed away knowing that this was important. "Grandma, he said " I'm a --...
"i'm in love with oddly shaped fruit and that’s why grandpa got suckered into this. but don't worry, i'll get him out! no mutant burgers are going to stop me!" he then picked his up toothbrush and left.
Our young hero, Ick Van Shneidenheid II, was off to his best freind's house, he had a carboot sale there and had heard that there were som Geeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrate toothbrushes there, so he bought the laser sonicare one for £250 (yeah, ££££!!!) and went to Manbroom lambbad to talk about the...
...one thing that could probably kill a fuc..... coff coff ...mutating hamburger....(drum rolls)....THE ZEROFASCINATIONINSTATION 5000 whith safety thingy et all. This weapon was devised by the master minds of the CIA, for the attack of the mutant lobsters in the Vegas sub and....
....university of Liverpool which are currently updating the ad shown in....
L.A. The Person who selled this to our hero was a person whom knowledge of the secret matters were very well known to him, like the flying bicycles that the bushadmnistration is trying to invent or the sub-narotiomanism system that nobody knows what the fu it is!
Ick Van Shneidenheid II then went off to blockbusters to buy porn porn. Damn, I mean er... sex videos. NO, erm, Die Hard, yeah he rented Die Hard he kept it under his bed because...
at the middle of the night he had the urge to watch Bruce Willis's tight arse. Then he kept the lethal weapon that could kill mutating Hamburgers under his bed also because tomorrow he would be hunting them!So when he fell asleep he dreamt of....
...Brucee's lap dancing skills in a room surrounded by red velvet curtains. He woke up not only to realize that baby oil has a new use, but also...
That it was already noon. So he picked up the lethal weapon that could kill Mutant Burgers an went out for the hunt. He started ....

my part:

...scratching his arse cause he'd layed on a nail, then went out to kill the hamburgers by...

The Bard
11-14-2004, 12:39 PM
his new scooter. He drove to the place where had first met them. He now only wanted to kill him. Hot sweat drip from his forhead, pee almost bursting from his blader, **** almost coming out of his anus, he would probably faint...butno he endured. he entered the place and saw that it was full of a gooey stuff probably made by the burgers. The smell was horrible...it smelled like rotten whip cream and eggs...oh wait that's just our hero who just made a lil poopoo on his pants...damn...

90SK
11-15-2004, 02:44 PM
:eyeraise:

He awoke with a start. He got up, looking around him. It had just been a dream. But why was he in the middle of the road? It all came back. The Burgers. The toothbrush. The scooter. The mission. His poor grandpa. He looked around, and noticed his scooter nearby."I must have been knocked off it by that..." A phesent roosted in the middle of the road. This was no ordinary phesent, he realized...

The Bard
11-17-2004, 02:53 AM
that he did not know what was phesent.So then he got up but he hit his knew on a hydrant, and it hurt alot, so he couldn't stop saying: ''**** ME, MOTHEER ****ER, THIS SHT!!! DAMN, GO **** UR GRANDMA, MOTHER ****ER, **** OFF...AH!''

Fealiks
11-18-2004, 12:14 PM
...Is what he would have said, had he not been a civilized person. which he wasn't.''**** ME, MOTHEER ****ER, THIS SHT!!! DAMN, GO **** UR GRANDMA, MOTHER ****ER, **** OFF...AH!'' he rambled on, kicking the phesant, who then explained what one is. Apparently, it's a...

The Bard
12-06-2004, 01:13 PM
SUDENLY he awoke again in bed, an thqat phesents don't ****ing exist. And then he thoght about deviding his 2 dvd of porn with his roomy but then discovered that 2 can't be devided.

Fealiks
12-07-2004, 01:02 PM
then took a lesson in basic maths, and found it can be divided to 1. SUDDENALEE

DarthTDe
12-10-2004, 03:35 PM
A crazed Kermit the Frog clone ran in and pulled out...

The Bard
12-16-2004, 10:52 AM
But then he descovered that it was just an ilusion created by what he was taking: L.S.D. Of course he just descovered this when he woke up next morning whith an old hag naked on his bed and no condom was found. So remmember lads safe sex.

DarthTDe
12-17-2004, 03:29 PM
"get the heck out of my home!"He yells.But then...

The Bard
01-04-2005, 01:28 PM
But then he looks at the middle part of the old hag and sees...OMG...a penis! And feels a slight tweeching in his arse. And he yells: "FOR ****'s SAKES!!!'' Then starts vomiting alover the his bed because he noticed that the hag WAS dead. ''Oh, no" says he ''If someone knows about this i'll be called a necrophile or what the ****'s it called''. He pinched himself and saw that wasn't a dream, and then he cut a bit of meat from his arm and still IT wasn't a dream. It isn't a ****ing dreAM . WHAT will our main character do to kill the mutant burger and get himself rid of this dead transexual hag that lying on his bed? OR is it possible that the burger was just another ilusion created by the acuds he is consuming?????

90SK
01-06-2005, 06:10 AM
Suddenly, his prized guava/eggplant hybrid rolled out from his robes and fell to the hard floor.

*plouch*

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

While he greived for his guava/eggplant hybrid, the Burger grabbed him and chucked him through the roof, into the attic. He stumbled around, but then he noticed, in a dusty corner, an axe...

DarthTDe
01-06-2005, 05:35 PM
He ran to the corner and picked it up,but then it fell through the floor...

PoM
01-07-2005, 07:05 AM
He jumped after.
But little did he know that there was nothing else than the second part of the mutated hamburger and the axe.
He grabbed the axe, but then threw it at the burger, because he didn't need it.
So he grabbed the ZERO-FASCINATION-IN-STATION-5000 and...

guybroom
08-01-2005, 07:36 PM
woke up again. "Oh for god's sake! when will i be properly awake? He got up, put the dog back on the floor and got dressed. He then went out his house and decided to...

The Bard
08-01-2005, 08:43 PM
get laid, because he would probably die in the fight between him and the burger. He went to a bordello, but noticed he didn't have enough money...so he had to make it with an old prostitute that worked in the streets, that had scabs evrywhere...EVERYWHERE. Oh god...That hurt but after awhile it smoothed. Then he went to find the burger. He entered...

guybroom
08-02-2005, 05:34 PM
a trance. He wanted to know where the burger was - it would have got half the way around the city by now. So he used his mystical powers to work out that the burger was ...

The Bard
08-02-2005, 07:44 PM
,in fact, right behind him. He used his machine to zap at the creature but it was too fast for him, sudenly a hole apeared in the midlle of the burger! HE then understood it as his mouth for it said ''Mister, i killed your grandma, and now i wanna **** somewhere tight''. Our hero then realized he was in such a big trouble started to cry but sudenly, he apeared, the fantabluouso, itiliano, qualqoiso, querola saberloiso mister....

PoM
08-18-2005, 06:19 PM
Smith.
Will smith.
Smith then said: Hello, i am here to...

The Bard
08-19-2005, 05:22 PM
pat my son in the head. Just to show how a great guy i am. (took this from the latest MAD magazine issue)

90SK
08-19-2005, 07:06 PM
Will patted his son on the head. Unfortunately, he did it too hard. His son's head was crushed into his neack, killing the child instantly. "Damn!" Will Smith said. "Away!!" He jumped on his flying carpet and sped away, leaving our confused hero in the dust, along side the bloody corpse.

The Bard
08-19-2005, 07:08 PM
But then our hero discovered that will smith was in reality working with the mutant burger. Why would they team up to destroy our hero?

PoM
08-20-2005, 04:09 AM
Yes, they would because the burger promised Will a milkshake.

The Bard
08-20-2005, 02:23 PM
So now he understood there was a whole conspiracy against him. The burger, willsmith. It was all starting to make sence.

PoM
08-20-2005, 06:29 PM
(sense is spelled like that <---)
Our hero decided to...

The Bard
08-20-2005, 08:41 PM
(sence is the ancient way of spelling it)

spray some perfume on his body. Even on his

90SK
08-20-2005, 08:57 PM
wisdom teeth because he knew he would need to

PoM
08-21-2005, 03:48 AM
(is that supposed to be "because he knew he would need to"?
Anyway...
Continuation:

think.

90SK
08-21-2005, 02:46 PM
((whoops. sorry about that ;) )

So he did, for quite a while. He sat on a rock, pondering. Finally he had a revelation.

The Bard
08-21-2005, 03:00 PM
A revelation indeed he had.

PoM
08-21-2005, 04:38 PM
He had a very complicated revelation.

The Bard
08-21-2005, 05:30 PM
Indeed a very complicated one.

PoM
08-22-2005, 10:19 AM
It was very, very complicated and kinda wierd too.

The revelation, he wrote on the rock.
On the rock, it said:

The Bard
08-22-2005, 03:00 PM
**** me and mary me young. What was that?? Was it some sort of love letter or somthing?? he couldn't stop wondering. Now he just had to figure out who wrote it.He found out quickly because below this was a signature. It read:

PoM
08-22-2005, 04:55 PM
"Our Hero"(He wrote it, stupid!:p)

The Bard
08-22-2005, 05:47 PM
"Nice'' said he. "I wrote it. How spectacular. HOW INTERESTING!!! HOW FRIGIN AMAZING.I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S NOT BUTTER.''

PoM
08-23-2005, 08:12 AM
But it was butter!

Suddenly, the stone turned into butter!

The Bard
08-23-2005, 08:28 AM
So he ate it but then he realized it was really a stone. So he fainted and was driven to the hospital.

PoM
08-23-2005, 09:58 AM
At the hospital, an assassin tried to get in, but was stopped by (censor).
(censor) decided to go talk to Billy about...

The Bard
08-23-2005, 10:40 AM
But billy then left because he wasn't part pf this story. (billy is the character of neverwnding story thread, piece of metal)

PoM
08-23-2005, 04:25 PM
(I know, but he got to this hospital by kicking his own face with his sixth leg!)

Anyway, Billy still left because he forgot why he was there.
So (censor) decided to go talk to our hero about...

The Bard
08-23-2005, 04:26 PM
something called

PoM
08-24-2005, 08:28 AM
a very, very

The Bard
08-24-2005, 08:44 AM
really VERY, VERY

PoM
08-24-2005, 02:10 PM
extreme

The Bard
08-24-2005, 02:38 PM
and...

PoM
08-25-2005, 10:35 AM
awesome

Bob Lion54
08-25-2005, 12:28 PM
spam thread...


(couldnt resist)

The Bard
08-25-2005, 01:08 PM
called BE MY WIFE. It was written by will smith but he decided to put it down after a few seconds. So (censor) talked to our hero about something called...

PoM
08-25-2005, 01:25 PM
a very...