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View Full Version : The never ending story!(Reply, or else!)


PoM
07-13-2005, 06:38 PM
Rules: Don't end it!
Have fun!
I'll start:
Once, there was this Little Billy, he found a piece of metal.
He expected that piece of metal to be sharp, so he cut himself with it on the hand.
But it wasn't sharp, it was....(Next poster continue)!!!

Jack the Black
07-14-2005, 03:10 AM
Originally posted by Piece of metal
Rules: Don't end it!
Have fun!
I'll start:
Once, there was this Little Billy, he found a piece of metal.
He expected that piece of metal to be sharp, so he cut himself with it on the hand.
But it wasn't sharp, it was....(Next poster continue)!!!

... so rusty that it fell apart as soon as it touched his hand.

"Damn," he cried, "how am I meant to cut myself now?"

Then he began to scatch the back of his hand as an iching started to become unabareable...

PoM
07-14-2005, 06:09 AM
(scratch, itch)

Then he figured he could just ignore it, until it stopped.
Since he was bored, he started wandering in a random direction,
where he met...

Jack the Black
07-14-2005, 10:38 AM
Originally posted by Piece of metal Then he figured he could just ignore it, until it stopped.
Since he was bored, he started wandering in a random direction,
where he met... [/B]

... the most evil thing to ever to exist in the history of man, a mime! What was worse was that mime had sight its annoying sights on him.

Not only that but the itch wasn't going away, infact it just seem to get worse.

The Bard
08-01-2005, 08:45 PM
It got so itchy he decided to play with his hand and his underwear or to be exact with his...

adey12
08-02-2005, 06:10 PM
crabs, knowing that he a had a problem he headed to the chemist when he met a giant super smelly.....

The Bard
08-02-2005, 07:47 PM
piece of turd in the ground. It was his neighbours dog ****. He then said maybe the acids in this can make my itchy itchy go away, he scrubed the **** all over his paws and noticed that it smelled like dog ****. Is it...

Bob Lion54
08-06-2005, 08:33 AM
really a good idea?
Thought he.
"No, its not." he relized.
So he looked around for a hose to wash his hands. He thought he saw one, but in reallity it was a ...

The Bard
08-06-2005, 12:04 PM
a piece of turd.

Kj°len
08-06-2005, 04:34 PM
"I cannot wash my hands with that!" he cried. He then jumped into a large vat of...

The Bard
08-06-2005, 04:52 PM
turd.

Kj°len
08-06-2005, 04:58 PM
He climbs out of th vat, and then drives to TheBard's house, where he stabs him thrice with a knife, and lectures his bleeding body about how he should make decent contributions to the story of his life. Then, he returns to his activites of...

Joshi
08-06-2005, 05:20 PM
...plotting to assasinate the The Bard. He called his buddy's from Iowa who'er all computer hackers and members of the IRA, but when they arrived they...

The Bard
08-06-2005, 05:21 PM
ate a piece of turd.

Kj°len
08-06-2005, 05:26 PM
Afterwards, they sat down, and seriously contemplated how a 16 year old teenager could be so immature. They had thought by the time you had reached 16, you would be a fairly adult person. They assume not everyone is like Kj°len, then. ;) Later, they went and did this activity, which has nothing to do with feces of any kind...

The Bard
08-06-2005, 05:31 PM
...But then again, that a person with a red/pink haired avatar should have more to do than to pay atention to an amteur 16 year old with a fetish for turds. But wait NOW our hero did find one thing that helped his itch. PISS. He pissed on his hand and...

Kj°len
08-06-2005, 05:34 PM
Cleaned it. Urine is very sterile, after all. Then, he turned his attention to...

Joshi
08-06-2005, 05:37 PM
the fish in the bathtub who told him the world was going to end in 28 days. He was so scared he...

Kj°len
08-06-2005, 05:39 PM
...ran to the local supermarket and had an epic battle with a giant coupon-wielding chicken. Afterwards...

Joshi
08-06-2005, 05:42 PM
...he stopped watching family guy and got back to his adventure with the lovely...

Kj°len
08-06-2005, 05:45 PM
Brenna, queen of the Britains. Afterwards, he conquered...

Joshi
08-06-2005, 05:51 PM
...Coney Island, but then he jumped off the Bumper cars and met his friend...

The Bard
08-06-2005, 06:26 PM
Poo Poo Platter, who was a black belt master.

Kj°len
08-06-2005, 10:19 PM
Luckily, Billy knew Tai Jitsu, and eagerly fought his opponent.

The Bard
08-07-2005, 09:34 AM
But then a pack of ninjas apeared and...

PoM
08-07-2005, 10:37 AM
...Scared him to death.

The Bard
08-07-2005, 10:53 AM
Then he ran to the bar he saw and asked for a shot of tequila. When he had all the hair in his chest(hehe) he ran to defeat all the ninjas.

Kj°len
08-07-2005, 03:12 PM
After the ninjas were pwned, he settled down and...

Joshi
08-07-2005, 03:25 PM
ate a caramel sundae. But there was something wrong, the sundae...

The Bard
08-07-2005, 03:37 PM
had turd in it. He said "HEY WAITER!! MY sundae has turd in it". ''i know'' replied the water,''it is mine''. Our hero looked at him and puked all of his suit. The waiter puked also and:''you idiot, i was joking!!! That's chocolate!''

Kj°len
08-07-2005, 03:47 PM
Then, TheBard was banned from this discussion because Billy's stomach couldn't handle any more of his cockknockery.

Mr Flibble
08-12-2005, 04:42 PM
And they all lived happily ever after.

The Bard
08-12-2005, 04:57 PM
And so billy got himself a wife. The beautiful Kjolen was of course his lovely mistress. The next day they went shopping and bought a pack of eggs, milk, butter and some new clothes.

Mr Flibble
08-12-2005, 06:13 PM
These were of course Love Eggs, and Billy got horrible diseases from them.

The Bard
08-12-2005, 06:56 PM
So, his wife made him some muffins for him to feel better. And after that a good nights sleep.

Mr Flibble
08-12-2005, 07:22 PM
Billy realised his story was being told by someone who believed that progression was for idiots and that non seqiturs are always funny.
In a moment of Matrix-like panic he licks a disabled guy and then takes a lot of pills. Blue ones.

The Bard
08-12-2005, 08:06 PM
So, after a hard day's work he went home to his wife. And she said to him:''honey, i made this pie for you i hope you like it'' Billy tried and said: ''how lovely''.

Joshi
08-12-2005, 08:18 PM
...at which point his wife immediatly divorced Billy because he was being overly nice when she told him to simply cut down on the swearing and immature crap. She took the family pig and left the house only to be...

Fealiks
08-12-2005, 08:30 PM
raped and killed by michael jackson who was trialed and let off... michael then went over to his friend's house where they spent hous developing an A-bomb they accidentally cloned it (dont ask me) and set them all off for a joke. then they realised that they had put in a divice that maked it clone itself instead of blowing up. as soon as one was cloned, its clone cloned another and so on this went on for several days until finally they squeezed together and blew up the universe. the "big bang" created a new one though. THIS WAS NOT A DREAM.


...

(no one said how long it could be :D )

Fender
08-12-2005, 10:20 PM
In a Review of the New Universe, Billy gave it a 78. He said "It had a good beat, and I could dance to it".

The Bard
08-13-2005, 09:45 AM
But he soon got tired because he was depressed. Oh so depressed he was, oh no, yes he was, yes but

Mr Flibble
08-13-2005, 11:32 AM
But then he realised that if he could start a story with multiple writers then instead of continuing the story they'd all add in random bananas, so Billy grabbed his shotgun and jumped in his poom poom wagon.

The Bard
08-13-2005, 01:42 PM
So he drove to the bakary to have some bread. Oh so delicious it was. Miss Bistis really outdid herself this time. The bread was sooo good. So good indeed. Good good. Good good. Oh yes it was.

Mr Flibble
08-13-2005, 02:35 PM
(WTF? Where did you pull bakery from? Okay, its random but...)

Bread. Billy's mind was full of bread. It was now corsing through his veins. It was falling out his ears, and it was welling up behind his eyes.
He feel to the groud and orgasmed bread. His tears of joy became crumbs, his gasps forming into bagettes as he breathed.
He lay, quietly panting,crumbs pouring from his mouth, and grinned softly.

The Bard
08-13-2005, 02:40 PM
And so he ate turd. yes turd turd turd turd. oh **** i said turd oh **** i said turd turdturd turd.,

Mr Flibble
08-13-2005, 04:52 PM
Dude what the **** is up with you?

PoM
08-14-2005, 09:40 AM
Bard, please stop spamming my thread with turds.

Continuing the story:
He decided to go home and eat his sweet, sweet bread.
Outside his house, he saw a flying car, but it wasn't flying, it was actually standing on the ground, and looked like a normal car, but...

Mr Flibble
08-14-2005, 11:34 AM
It wasn't flying, not as such.
It seemed to be travelling at a ground level of its own devising.
Billy approached it in a dreamlike state, still dripping criossants from his mouth.
From a distance it was travelling quite quickly, but up close it wasn't moving at all.
Billy reached out a crumb laden hand to open the door when...

Joshi
08-14-2005, 02:40 PM
Bard, please stop spamming my thread with turds.


You may as well count that as your second warning Bard.

Fealiks
08-14-2005, 04:02 PM
then he got off the game that was the last 6 posts excluding joshi's (the new universe people)
"ΦΩΡΡΘ Ζΰίμξ!!!! ύЩЩ.... ФХϋЋ?" he asked in greek, the new universal language
"dude what you said doesnt make sense" said the remainders of his child
then he realised that he only existed in words!! MUHAHAHAHA!!!! im killing him looooook
:smash:
BILLY

:joy:

anyway billy's dead the new character is *drumrolls*...

PoM
08-16-2005, 09:05 AM
Fealiks.
Fealiks decided to browse lucasforums a little, but little did he know that...

Joshi
08-16-2005, 11:37 AM
In about three hours, he'll be banned from the boards.

Fealiks
08-16-2005, 01:27 PM
fealiks then rejoiced because he hadnt been ba--

USER DELETED

Fender
08-16-2005, 10:20 PM
YAY

Billy's back baby! in his new mini cooper copy, he attempted a death defying feat which consisted of him...

Smon
08-17-2005, 12:21 AM
...borrowing into the mind of Barbara Walters who...

PoM
08-17-2005, 11:16 AM
...accidentaly...

Joshi
08-17-2005, 03:01 PM
fell of a cliff...

90SK
08-18-2005, 04:18 AM
...and into the outstretched arms of...

PoM
08-18-2005, 06:18 PM
Me.


Bleep! The message you enter is to short, i said, or rather my computer said, so i decided to add this random smiley::explode:

The Bard
08-19-2005, 05:20 PM
freaked out the other day.

so then he jumped from my arms and flipped across...

90SK
08-19-2005, 07:02 PM
...the train tracks, narrowly avoiding being flattened by a train driven by...

PoM
08-20-2005, 04:07 AM
C. Skye

C. Skye did nothing to save him, because he wanted to paint the train red anyway,

Fender
08-20-2005, 10:14 AM
but not that hue! Softer tones are required for a train of this stature, so....

The Bard
08-20-2005, 04:03 PM
he paint it black. No colours anymore, want it to turn black. See the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes.

PoM
08-20-2005, 06:27 PM
He got very distracted by the women in his mind, and fainted.
Then he ended up at lucasforums without a clue on how that happened.
Billy thougt that was odd so he wanted to...

Smon
08-21-2005, 06:24 AM
post at this ridiculous topic...

The Bard
08-21-2005, 08:46 AM
But he didn't because he saw all his life was written there. WHY??? HOW?????

90SK
08-21-2005, 02:44 PM
The answer was simple, and could be found painted right on...

The Bard
08-21-2005, 03:01 PM
his mind.

PoM
08-21-2005, 04:36 PM
Billy kept reading this thread, and asked:

In what way is it painted on my mind and what is the answer?

The Bard
08-21-2005, 05:31 PM
In THAT way he answered himself. It was...

90SK
08-21-2005, 06:23 PM
..not something he could openly disclose, but he took it to heart anyway. BUt now that he had the answer in his grasp, he would have to...

Joshi
08-21-2005, 06:57 PM
... continue reading this thread in the hope that it would tell him what to do next, no such luck.


(if anyone can tell me the really obscure referance, I'll be really impressed)

The Bard
08-21-2005, 08:27 PM
So he went turned off the computer and now we can continue the story. Like the voodoo lady said it's not right to know the future.

PoM
08-22-2005, 10:15 AM
Billy decided to go to San Andreas.
In San Andreas, he met CJ.
CJ said: Hello, mah homie!
Then Billy...

The Bard
08-22-2005, 03:02 PM
said: "WHATEVA!". CAUSE THIS IS MY UNITED STATES OF WhATEVER!

PoM
08-22-2005, 04:52 PM
And then he ran away screaming "I am...

The Bard
08-22-2005, 05:49 PM
gay and like to have plenty of dogs in my living room'''So here we understand that he considered his ex-wife, the beautiful kjolen, nothing but a mere pet. No wonder he treated her nice.

PoM
08-23-2005, 08:11 AM
He had 3 dogs and 5 dogs and 2 dogs and K-Jo

The Bard
08-23-2005, 08:30 AM
wow!!!

PoM
08-23-2005, 09:57 AM
Said The Bard.

The Bard
08-23-2005, 10:55 AM
Said piece of metal

PoM
08-23-2005, 04:21 PM
Said the Bard, and then decided to never say "said piece of metal" ever again or anything that reminds of it.

The Bard
08-23-2005, 04:23 PM
Thought piece of metal. As you see piece of metal was having quite and interesting conversation in his mind.

PoM
08-24-2005, 08:29 AM
...And then The Bard decided to continue the story about Billy by writing

The Bard
08-24-2005, 08:43 AM
: Billy then left wherever he was and continued looking for his arch enemy. When he found him his arch enemy said:

PoM
08-24-2005, 02:11 PM
In a happy tone:

The Bard
08-24-2005, 02:37 PM
'''Hello, Billy you idiot, i am here to give you the worst day of your ****ing life''

PoM
08-25-2005, 10:37 AM
Expected Billy, but in fact he said:

The Bard
08-25-2005, 01:06 PM
''Bily, YOU IDIOT!!!! I"M GONNA GIVE YOU THE SECOND WORST DAY OF YOUR LIFE"
AND THIS IS WHAT IN FACT HE SAID. BECAUSE IF NOT RIGHT THE ****ING STORY AS YOU LIKE IT!

PoM
08-25-2005, 01:26 PM
(It's spelled write, but anyway)

Then Billy got really scared and...

The Bard
08-25-2005, 02:22 PM
ate a puding.

PoM
08-25-2005, 03:55 PM
While eating the puding, his arch enemy started getting really annoyed because Billy seemed to ignore him, so he said to Billy that...

The Bard
09-03-2005, 02:17 PM
he would shoot his leg and then the other and then his arms and then he would cut off his tongues.

PoM
09-04-2005, 06:28 AM
Both of them, actually, but apparently Billy...

90SK
09-04-2005, 01:09 PM
Leapt at his attacker from behind (somehow)! He began throttling his foe, as the villain bucked here and there trying to dislodge his would-be adversary. Finally he succeeded, and hit Billy square across the face. Billy stumbled, and then returned fire with two more hits in the face and abdomen. His attacker wheeled, stumbling onto a nearby fire escape. HE turned and retreated upwards, Billy giving chase.

They resumed fighting as they found themselves at the top of the winding stairs, leading to a vast rooftop. Billy aimed a flying kick at his opponent. He missed, and the foe grabbed his leg and spun heaved him to the ground. Before Billy had the chance to recover, The fop began dragging Billy towards the roof's edge...

PoM
09-04-2005, 02:11 PM
...Of DOOM!!!!!!!!1111oneeleven
Billy would jump in the air and make 8 perfectly perfect somersaults(sp?) while whistling "twinkle twinkle little star" backwards in slow motion.
Then they went back to reality and realized that they where only talking about that, so they started acting it out in real life, but when Billy came to the roof's edge of DOOM!!!!!!!!1111oneeleven, he started to doubt he would be able to do 8 perfectly perfect somersaults(sp?) while whistling "twinkle twinkle little star" backwards in slow motion, so his arch-enemy said: I consider this considerably considerable!

Then Billy...

The Bard
09-05-2005, 08:52 AM
Billy tryed out that 5 finger thing...you know the one in Kill Bill...but it didn't work!! SO.....

PoM
09-05-2005, 11:24 AM
He woke up!

The Bard
09-05-2005, 03:25 PM
And said to his enemy...''PLEASE, DON"t"'!!! HAVE MERCY UPON ME!!! AND I GET DOWN ON MY NNEES!!""

PoM
09-05-2005, 06:00 PM
Then he realised all of it was a dream, so he went outside and found a piece of metal...****! He just realised this happened in his dream!
So he quickly bought an airplane ticket to...

The Bard
09-05-2005, 06:05 PM
BUT WAIT!!!! Now he was wondering when did the dream began???

Joshi
09-05-2005, 06:58 PM
But then surmised that any fool could see the dream began shortly after he fell asleep. And with that, he fell back to sleep...and never woke up again.

90SK
09-05-2005, 08:27 PM
He found himself in the recurring nightmare of the foe attempting to kill him. He was back on the rooftops, only this time things were a bit different. He noted that the rooftop was now a vast carp, and his foe had a dreadful tie. Other than that, he could find no other differences with the scenario. Suddenly, he realized that his foe was still dragging him to the edge of the fish. He thought quickly...

PoM
09-06-2005, 03:48 AM
"I am dreaming!"
He was lucid dreaming!
He knew everything about that, and he knew he could do anything, so he pulled up a...

90SK
09-06-2005, 08:01 PM
NOTHING! AAARRGGHHH!

He plummeted off the edge of the carp.

"Have a nice day", it said to him.
"Thanks." He fell and fell, until he landed in a puddle of...

PoM
09-07-2005, 02:42 AM
Signs saying "It's PoM's birthday today!
That really confused Billy, so he...

90SK
09-07-2005, 04:21 PM
Sang POM a birthday song...but wait. Wha...? His tongue was gone! Oh noes! Billy started groaning loudly and running around, until he tripped on one of the haphazardly placed signs. He fell flat on his...

PoM
09-08-2005, 06:36 AM
grill.

90SK
09-12-2005, 06:52 PM
The End.

(((I guess that clinches it, eh? No more protagonist.)))

Joshi
09-12-2005, 07:34 PM
Does that mean I can close this sorry excuse for a thread?

90SK
09-12-2005, 07:40 PM
Eh, whatever. I'm good with it.

Joshi
09-12-2005, 07:45 PM
That sounds like a request to me, motion granted.