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View Full Version : My pet will eat your pet!


Zoom Rabbit
11-16-2005, 09:54 PM
This is my kitty-cat Fweazle. :dozey: I realize you can't see him, but I'm holding him up to the monitor screen right now. He's a black short-haired tom cat about five months old, who loves to give kisses and ride on your shoulder.

Despite his kindly disposition, my pet will eat your pet. Discuss!

Joshi
11-17-2005, 03:54 AM
I realize you can't see him, but I'm holding him up to the monitor screen right now.

The sad thing is, there's a real good chance he actually did this.

As for your pet eating mine, I don't have a pet, try and get round that conundrum genius.

Ray Jones
11-17-2005, 05:15 AM
Fweasle? How am I supposed to get that over my tounge?

However, I don't have a pet either, since I live in a all new flat, certainly not necessarily mine (life=bitch), but I also got one, and am also at work all day. That plus I'm not pro-let-that-pet-all-day-long-alone-in-a-lonely-loney-flat, not to speak about the what-goes-in-must-come-out-thing.

But for partitial contribution, this is my little 2.65 years old daughter.

> Come here and ay "hi" sweety! -- zwefzurf9123131

^^;

DrMcCoy
11-17-2005, 09:53 AM
...I used to have a budgie... He died some years ago...

Ray Jones
11-17-2005, 10:52 AM
Life is a condition leading to death without fail. /smart


A sentence directly underneath and referenced in the entry "pet" in the dictionary.

*nods*

:D

Zoom Rabbit
11-17-2005, 11:12 AM
*(Gives Neil a pet lizard, then sets Fweazle after it.)*

Oh, come on...no one here has a pet that can take on my kitty-cat? :dozey: I can understand Ray not having a pet, but the rest of you certainly must have gerbils, chihuahuas or some other small animal we can set loose for sport?

Gabez
11-17-2005, 11:45 AM
The sad thing is, there's a real good chance he actually did this.
The sad thing is, there's a really good chance that Johshi actually could see the cat due to the new moderator technology that enables him to see into all of our homes.

Don't broswe the Internet naked.

Sometimes Joshi will appear as a floating head in the corner of your screen. If you see this, avoid eye contact at all costs.

Always smile.

Anyway, I have two cats called Plato and Pandora. They are twin brother and sister. Plato's a tabby and Pandora's a russian blue I think it is. They both have white bibs and socks. And big big eyes.

Smile.

Joshi
11-17-2005, 11:56 AM
I'm a student, they certainly don't allow pets in the dorms. As for my family (i.e, parents) they had a dog before I was born, but it ran away, and then i was born and they figured two kids and a shop were enough to look after without another mouth to feed and then leave it's crap wherever it feels like.

Long story short, have never had a pet (though I do have an odd affinity with animals...) and I don't have one now, but if you like, you can set your Fweazle loose on my caveman (otherwise knows as steve), it'd probably win anyway considering my caveman has a tendancy to get beaten up by girls.

Lady Jedi
11-17-2005, 12:39 PM
Okay, Zoom bunny, a pet to take on your cat, eh?

Well, there's this little fella: *imagine a large black horse with orange kitten on his back* (ignore the kitten on his back, he could stomp yours in a heartbeat. :p


I've also got a barn cat that has killed a rabbit or two ,and he's torn into a few stray cats that dared show up. He'd take on 'Fweazle'. :D

Zoom Rabbit
11-17-2005, 09:24 PM
:tsk: Ray, I don't think your caveman qualifies as a pet. Mine is named Edward.

Lady Jedi: Thanks! :D *(Puts Fweazle down. He runs over, eats the horse, kitten and five barn cats.)* Good kitty.

I have five cats now, although I really never wanted more than four. I wound up with another when a girl I was seeing split town and left me with her precious *Shasta.* :dozey: Sigh. At least I have five acres full of gopher holes and plenty of work for her...

Alien426
11-18-2005, 01:43 AM
Your cat might eat my dustbunnies Tiffany, Heather, Cody, Dylan, Dermot, Jordan, Taylor, Brittany, Wesley, Rumor, Scout, Cassidy, Zoe, Chloe, Max, Hunter, Kendall, Caitlin, Noah, Sascha, Morgan, Kyra, Ian, Lauren, Q-bert and Phil. It could eat my sister's guinea pigs Mr. Beefy and dunno (they are afraight of their own shadows). It wouldn't last a second against her rat, though. It (dunno its name either, it's to early and I'm too exhausted) bit some pets in a pet store to death and my sis - ever the helpful - offered to take it so it didn't have to be killed.

She doesn't ever touch it and only reaches into its cage with gloves. I'm not shítting you.

Joshi
11-18-2005, 05:52 AM
:tsk: Ray, I don't think your caveman qualifies as a pet. Mine is named Edward.

At which point did I turn into Ray and is the operation fully reversable?

Ray Jones
11-18-2005, 06:49 AM
Yay, at this point I'd appropriately say our both anacondas could compete infinitely, Neil. All we need is a battlefield to fight without restraint. I want my face back, though. ;~

Zoom Rabbit
11-18-2005, 11:20 AM
At which point did I turn into Ray and is the operation fully reversable?

I believe it was in the post you just quoted, and no...:dozey: you will be Ray Jones forever. Sorry. Just go with it, and develop an affinity for beer.

Don't wake the dragon. :max: He's mean and hungry!

Alien426: She probably wears gloves when she handles you, too. :D

*(Fweazle eats all the dusbunnies and anacondas, then chases a moth.)*

Joshi
11-18-2005, 11:59 AM
I believe it was in the post you just quoted, and no...:dozey: you will be Ray Jones forever. Sorry. Just go with it, and develop an affinity for beer.

What gives you the idea that I don't have an affinity for beer?

Zoom Rabbit
11-18-2005, 08:46 PM
Ray's train of thought clearly reflects the influence of beer. What? *(Runs into town and buys duct tape.)* Maybe we should share this before the party. *(Pours beer into all females.)*

Erm...? :dozey: Trampoline!

edlib
11-18-2005, 09:39 PM
:tsk: Ray, I don't think your caveman qualifies as a pet. Mine is named Edward.
:eyeraise: What an odd name for a caveman... hurgh! *Grunt*

Anyway, I have 2 cats that I room with (they have let me know in no uncertain terms that it's really their place, but they'll keep me around as long as I continue to pay for it, as well as performing all those 'opposable-thumb' activities that I do so well for them, like opening cans of food and operating the litter scoop.)

One is a normal size cat, named,.. um... "Choo-Choo" (listen, I didn't name her, really!) and the other one is a giant, mutant 35-pound leviathan I call "Kitten." (Her real given name, which nobody calls her anymore is "Crisco" ... cause she's fat in the can.)
I think she could eat your pet, no matter what it is, including the pony... if she wasn't such a fraidy cat.

The best pet I ever had was my skunk Larry. He rocked.

Skinkie
11-19-2005, 12:27 AM
I have like 8 cats now. It's that thing where if you live in the country and put out food for one cat, you suddenly own lots of them. And them breed, and inbreed, and soon all your cats are about half the size of normal, infertile, and dumb as rocks.

Zoom Rabbit
11-20-2005, 08:07 PM
Well, at least the infertility is a good thing. :eek: I tried leaving food out once when one of my cats was sick and didn't want to come inside to eat, and an hour later I saw a raccoon chowing down on it. She just sat there and looked at the raccoon like, 'Hello strange looking kitty. Have some food--I'm not hungry right now.'

My new cat Shasta saw her first deer the other day. :D I think *rapt concern* would describe her reaction best. She's always been an inside cat, living in an apartment in town, and now she's out in the country. I said, 'That's the biggest damn kitty you've EVER seen, isn't it?'

*(Puts Fweazle down. He runs over, eats ten cats and a skunk, then claws the back of the nice sofa.)*

Ray Jones
11-21-2005, 10:47 AM
Ray's train of thought clearly reflects the influence of beer. What? *(Runs into town and buys duct tape.)* Maybe we should share this before the party. *(Pours beer into all females.)*

Erm...? :dozey: Trampoline!
I'm not sure what this train of thought reflects, but almost certain it has nothing to do with *breast implantations* or the sentence "Wunderbar, schüttel' doch mal dran." Not sure about variations of those, though. I'm also surprised that I'm obviously subscribed to beer rather than mariyuganjae, although that can't be poured into all females. The duct tape in turn is another aspect, I could easily use it as penis ring. And to be honest, my thinking is driven by only two things, but I really can't tell anything about it.

DrMcCoy
11-21-2005, 10:49 AM
"Wunderbar, schüttel' doch mal dran."

Hmm, I'd schüttel on you any day... :naughty:

90SK
11-21-2005, 03:16 PM
I think it's safe to say that my two cats, Pain and Death (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v497/CaptainSkye/4b-SurprisedCat.jpg), could eat anyone of you any day. *ahem*


Actually, I have an enormous cat named Snoopy who is not unlike the fictitious cats in the above picture. Sans the glowing eyes, yeah. He has a big pink belly that hangs out because he licks it too much from anxiety. The hair doesn't grow back that well. I'm sure your cat could probably get him, but I take it he's on a low-fat diet. >_>

Kjølen
11-21-2005, 08:54 PM
So, do we get any REAL pics of Fweazle? No digicam? Put him in the scanner!

Mr Cheese
11-22-2005, 12:16 AM
Fweazle probably would kill everyone's pets. Yet more evidence that cats are PURE EVIL!!!!

Zoom Rabbit
11-22-2005, 08:22 PM
This isn't Fweazle, but it does look just like him:

http://www.wallpapers.as.ro/animals/black%20cat.jpg

*(Fweazle scampers over and eats Skye's twin levitating cats, then goes to use the sand box.)* Mr. Cheese is right. What part of 'my pet will eat your pet' don't you guys understand?

Ray: DO. NOT. USE. DUCT. TAPE. AS-- :dozey: Oh, screw it. Go ahead. It should keep you busy for awhile...

Kjølen
11-23-2005, 12:09 AM
That cat is staring into my soul.

Ray Jones
11-23-2005, 03:24 AM
I don't understand the err.. 'Why doesn't he just leaves for a less blurry world'.

And why is there a pink slug coming out of his nose? °__°

mrGoodsoup
11-25-2005, 07:31 PM
umm... I have a cat called Ginsberg. I got it from a tv show, though I cant remember
what show. If anyone knows I would gladly e-mail you a free sample of a local brand
of frozen pizza.. deal? :rolleyes:

Ray Jones
11-28-2005, 05:54 AM
Your cat has to be eaten by Fwerwuqauzzal first. What does that mean anyway? And who's that girl you were talking about? :dozey: No, I wasn't talking to you, but to you. Mostly. *points at the guy with the blurry cat*

Zoom Rabbit
11-30-2005, 01:43 PM
Ray, that isn't a pink slug coming out of his nose. It's Tony Blair's brain!

*(Fweazle jumps off of the sofa, eats Ginsberg and a free frozen pizza. He looks disappointed, MEOWs loudly...then hunkers down and eyes Ray.)*

Uh-oh. :max: I think I forgot to feed him this morning, and he's gotten huge...

Ray Jones
12-02-2005, 05:29 AM
At times this..err.. happens to me too. Nonetheless and maybe against all odds, even the splendour gets eaten on occasion, eventually. Oh boay. =]

Das Mole
12-02-2005, 08:27 AM
My dog is hilarious. He's never supposed to get on the furniture, but he always tries...and he's so overly casual about it that it's obvious what he's trying to do. Like, he'll put one paw up on the couch and wait for a little bit...then two. Then wait. Then he'll slowly pick his back paws up off the floor and get on there, then stand around for a bit. Then slowly lay down. He's so predictable, as a matter of fact, that I "voice-overed" the whole thing one time, like I was saying exactly what he was thinking...my timing was perfect.

Ray Jones
12-02-2005, 09:57 AM
So what's gonna happen this time?

Das Mole
12-02-2005, 10:27 AM
The same as always.

Ray Jones
12-02-2005, 10:29 AM
Ooooh, now I'm curious!

Das Mole
12-02-2005, 10:31 AM
As you should be.

Ray Jones
12-02-2005, 10:45 AM
Oh boy, Oh boy.

Zoom Rabbit
12-02-2005, 09:20 PM
*(Fweazle eats Das Mole's dog, couch, an ice cream truck, Ray and a pack of antelope. Now the size of Passaic, NJ, Fweazle advances on the eastern seaboard.)*

We have no chance. :max:

edlib
12-03-2005, 12:33 AM
:assult:
Only Wally can save us now!


Hmmm...

But then again, it's very possible that the cure could be worse than the disease...

I think I'll take my chances... I do buy my cat food in bulk at the wholesale club, so I always have plenty on hand...

Should buy me some time...