View Full Version : Anti-Tim RPG
07-30-2006, 12:29 AM
Since Smon wouldn't start it and let me go ahead and do it, here it is! the Anti-Tim RPG! Or would it be the Anti-Anti-Tim RPG??? Hmm...Well, that dastardly Anti-Tim is up to no good and it's up to us forumites to stop him and make the world a better place for creative games like Psychonauts! This is my first RPG by the way.
Scenario: As you should all know, the Anti-Tim is Tim Shafer's evil twin from a parallel universe (props to Smon for bringing this evil character to light) who unlike our beloved Shafer is enemy of creativity and fun. You must keep in mind that these two are opposites as much as possible. But in Anti-Tim's world, games like Psychonauts flourish to no end, and that maddens Anti-Tim in turn as repetitive gameplay and mediocre level design are his forte. He has learned that his (good) twin in our world enjoys a life full of recognition, fans and is generally happy. And that nefarious (and jealous) Anti-Tim has devised a plot to rid of the real Shafer and take over his life, slowly replacing the original's game-design philosophies with his own and pitch a sophomoric shooter to MS as the next big killer-app. Too bad that repetitive action sequences and mediocre design are real sellers here. As to how did he get here? Well, that is one of his closely guarded secrets that we must learn and exploit...
1.It's encouraged to play as yourself in the RPG (for example, I'm playing as myself; Miss_Mayhem) but an OC is acceptable too. You must write your name, age, appearance, gender, personality, weaknesses, and skills down in a bio at the LEAST. If there is more you’d like to include about yourself go right ahead. If playing yourself, You must still write name (plus an alias if you’d like), age, gender and appearance (Be a normal human or be kooky with looks, either is cool), weaknesses (no one is perfect), and skills but personality is not necessary as we all know another well enough for this to work.
2.No god-modding or anything that gives you an unfair advantage.
3. Don't kill another person's character off.
4. Dont use someone elses character in a way that can/will/would affect any plot thang we might have goin'. Only use someone elses character for dialog purposes and try to keep it minimal.
5. Dont try to start a romance with someone if the love-interest in question is against it. You can try to have the Nils thang goin and hit on all the fellow members of the opposite gender, but dont try for anything serious if the person doesn't like the idea.
6. Keep this within the rated 'T' category. Honestly, do we want risqué makeout sessions or cannibals eating us alive with their bare hands? Probably not, at least, I dont.
7.You cant play any of the campers or counselors in the RPG ...yet. Hopefully, we'll get to the point where the canon-characters from Psychonauts are up for grabs and you can play 2 people if you'd like (we just need a dimension-hopping device to get there...). Since you'd have control of that person, you get liberties with rules 3, 4 and 5 that only apply to them. So Pyro, if you call dibs on him first, Sasha can so crush on you. I call dibs on Lili!. You might as well call shotgun and dib canon-characters now for the future.
8. DONT SPAM! Lets try to keep this on topic
9. No bashing!!! If you must make a derogatory remark about someone on RD for comedic or ambiance purposes, make the person up.
Well, now that we have the rules down (in retrospect, it seems like alot but they are all necessary) lets start this! Hopefully, we can get to the ass-kicking soon, there will be :twogun:, :rifle1: and : :lsduel: ...maybe, and we all hafta meet first somehow if that should happen. Kay, the RPG starts.........NOW!!
Name: Miss_Mayhem, also known as Mayhem
Appearance: shoulder length dark hair that is let loose, tanned skin, vampire teeth, elfish ears and reddish eyes. She (I, wow this is weird) wears denim capris and a yellow pacman t-shirt (ooh! Pennyarcade reference!) with a longsleeve white shirt underneath. On the smallish side, and thin (kay, that 4TR is true about me, I am too thin, I prefer the term willowy or lithe though).
Weaknesses: horrible at actual physical activity
Skills: stealthy, can fit into small spaces, enhanced senses, wicked elf abilities such as mild empathy powers and having a degree of control over nature, knows a few spells (ead: 2!) and is good at shotting with either bows/arrows or guns.
Another day. Another angry flame ware. That was to be expected on Razputin.net forums. Nothing stayed on-topic for too long there, something Mayhem had learned long ago and found refreshing compared to other stiff message-boards she had joined and abandoned. She sat at a computer set in her room in the wee hours of the night, replying to a random thread and not trying to get caught up in the angry flame-war that had sprung up between Genericdude#1 and FangirlLOL who were notorious for the way they could rile anyone up and derail a thread. Their angry banter was funny really. FangirlLOL responded to a post with a menacing "Sic the Anti-Tim on 'im!".
Genericdude#1 replied: "*shrugs off* meh, he's not real."
Smon responded angrily: *eye-twitch* He is real! Don’t lie or deny his existence, for he is out there...watching our every move.
Mayhem rolled her eyes and began clacking away on the pc, writing something along the lines of, "The Anti-Tim real, duh. Everyone knows tat" She was promptly vocabupwned seconds later.
Meanwhile in San Fran..
The rain poured down relentlessly, and it did not make escape any easier for the man. For those who knew him, he stuck out like a sore thumb. Probably the beard... This man was Tim Shafer, and for once he felt terrified. The glaring lights of the Weinermobile flashed from behind him, and his legs worked overtime to outrun the monstrosity. Just then, he saw a glimmer of hope. Praying that his assumption to prove true, Shafer abruptly sped to the right. The Weinermobile was stuborn and followed. Fatigue wearing him down, Tim was relieved to hear the shrill bell ring. He dared to slow down and faced his enemy. It stared right back and began to advance with the whirring noise it tended to make. Tim's death would not be that day, as a flood of children gushed from the school's front entrance, and the kids found little option but to crowd around the hotdog-shaped vehicle.
Tim smirked and made his getaway, hidden from view. Now at a park, he slowed down, and found himself being pulled into the shady confines of a shrub. "Manny? Oh, it's just you, thank God! I though it had been that damn Weinermob--"
His employee groaned, "You know that Anti-Tim is after you, you cant walk around without protection! You have those guards afterall...how did you escape their sights anyway? Well, whatever, but that freak car isn't the worst of things that Anti-Tim has up his sleeve. We are going to need help, ya know."
Tim stood up and tugged free from the bushes, "I think I know who can help us, the only other people who know of Anti-Tim ... What site has the largest congregation of rabid and dedicated Psychonauts fans?"
Mannycrawled free from the shrub himself, "Um, Razputin.net, I think. Why? Ohh noo, you don't mean to..."
Tim's eyes narrowed, "Yep. Send them the message. Only they can help us now."
(I hope noone was OOC, if so, Sorry. And yeah, this was long and kinda crummy but this was the best way I could think to set it up). JOIN! HAVE FUN! NOW! ;)
07-30-2006, 01:48 AM
Name: Mashi An'krekku (but please don't refer to me by my last name)
Example Appearace (http://www.deviantart.com/view/35656347/)
Weaknesses: Music, shiny things.
Skills: All skills of declawed cats...jumping on furniture, sleeping, eating, being generally lazy sometimes, playfulness. Plus ungood DDR skills and a lovely singing voice!
Meanwhile at the Razputin.net Forums, Mashi was being annoying as usual, singing They Might Be Giants lyrics and drumming on the wall.
"By rocket to the moon, by airplace to the rocket, by taxi to the airport, by front door to the taxiii! By throwing back the blanket hanging down the legs..."
Then she forgot the lyrics and starting humming and dancing terribly. She tripped over a rock with a face drawn on it.
"Damn you, Steve. ...I regret making you the leader. ...NO YOU." Apparantly, she's talking to a rock. Nice one. "Hey, at least the demonic head-bird would be a better leader than you!"
07-30-2006, 02:38 AM
'Ah yes', Mayhem grumbled as FangirlLOL posted a particularly idiotic remark aimed at her, Fighting the urge to engage in her tomfoolery (gasp! I finally used that word, w00t!) Mayhem closed the thread, about to open a thread named 'Interesting Smells' that had caught her attention. " I should change my avatar first," She mused, clicking on the 'user cp' button. She was alerted to a new PM from...Tim Shafer?. Curiosity overcoming her, she opened it. What was written confuzzled poor Mayhem. It read,
" Dear Miss_Mayhem, we here at DoubleFine are requesting the services of fellow Psychonaut fans from Razputin.net to assist us in the fight against the Anti-Tim. Surely you have heard of the jerk. Rally with other members at RD, this will be like so totally epic, d00derz! An email with an attachment awaits in your yahoo. Sincerely, Tim Shafer
More confuzzled than before, Mayhem clicked back to The Mental Minx's off-Topic Party. Hmm..Mashi was on right now. Clicking on her name nelow a thread she had started, mayhem sent Mashi a PM that read, "Mashi??? I just got this 00ber-weird pm from Tim Shafer...did you get one? I'monna ask the others..."
(Oh, and before I forget, everything here that refers to real people is used in a parodic manner and no mony is made, such as no character is defamed either. In fact, if you can't tell, we are all fans of Tim' work)
07-30-2006, 02:42 AM
Name: Pyramid Head
Age: he's... some kind of... OLD.
Weaknesses: Slow, dumb, can't talk no english.
Skills: Ridiculous amounts of physical strength.
Pyramid Head wandered around the LF, occasionally cutting down a popup or banner filled with spyware with his Great Knife. That's pretty much all he does.
07-30-2006, 02:47 AM
Mashi gave a thumbs up at Pyramid Head. "Yeah, you kill those popups." Suddenly her User CP beeped. Because it can. ANd she got a new PM.
"Hey, PH. Tim Schafer needs our help." Suddenly she appeared wearing a White Mage's robe. "Round up the neighborhood. It's time to go to war!"
There was a bitter silence, as Mashi was fuming at Steve's latest remark. "I'M AWARE I'M NOT A WHITE MAGE, STEVE. SHUT THE F00k UP!"
07-30-2006, 02:47 AM
An annoying pop-up dared to ... pop-up just as the PM was sent, but before it completely ...pop-upped, a sprite sword cut through it. Pyramid. Seeing as he was active, Mayhem PMed Pyramid:
*pantomining entire time* Kay you speaky no English, blah-blah, talk talk, Tim Shafer sent me a PM! *more pantomine* You 2? n33d l33t $p33k?
07-30-2006, 03:01 AM
[A note: Pyramid Head talks in growls and grunts. I know this because I...do. I assume he understands it, though.]
Mashi walked out of her thread on the search for a highly populated one. Steve was with her, being the voice of anti-reason as always.
"SHUT UP, STEVE OR I'LL THROW YOU OFF THE DAMN CLIFF."
07-30-2006, 03:05 AM
Pyramid Head followed Mashi about. "Grrig?" It asked.
07-30-2006, 03:08 AM
"No," she responded. "I'm making the thread...THAT'S IT STEVE. YOU'RE DEAD." She threw the rock off that cliff that was previously mentioned. It hit someone on the head.
07-30-2006, 03:11 AM
Pyramid Head walked over to a UGO advertisement and chopped it up, before returning to following Mashi around, dragging his knife along the ground, making the worst, most terrible screeching noise, ever.
07-30-2006, 03:17 AM
OW *Dies then regenerates* Mayhem types, "was Steve being a jackass again? And that Anti-Tim thing ... it's creepy. We should drag Steve along to die. he's dispensable"
Name: Brandon "Smon" Waldmann
Weaknesses: Poor spelling, cowboys.
Skills: Can enter the internet... that's right. I'm not typing this. I'm saying it.
Smon was typing on the computer posting around the LFRD when suddenly he got a PM. It said simply. "Dude, Anti-Tim, action go.".
"...I ****IN' KNEW IT."
Smon quickly typed into the address prompt of Firefox: *@[=g3,8d]\&fbb=-q]/hk%fg and then pressed delete. Suddenly his screen glowed and pulled him into the internet where he started a thread called "I ****IN' TOLD YOU SO." and waited.
07-30-2006, 03:54 AM
A new thread! Mayhem entered and excitedly typed: You too? You got the PM??? d00derz, 'tis quite weird... seeing as you are the local Anti-Tim specialist, what should we do? I mean, you can tell if it's the real TIm and not some prank, right? I looked into my Yahoo and there was an attachment. I thought it was a virus...should I open it yet?
Smon quickly posted. "Hell yes you should open it, all life as we know it may cease to be if you don't!"
07-30-2006, 03:58 AM
Nick names: (I just thought I'd add them) Pyro, Madz.
Age: Almost twelve.
Gender: Female (Hence pyrohappyGIRL)
Race: Elven psychic
Appearance: Tall, pale and thin. She's got like, pointy ears, and her hair is ginger with red streaks (But she dyes it a lot) She wears a pair of dark blue trackpants with a repeated white CCC logo in green down the side. She has a black t-shirt with a picture of fire on it, with the quote 'fire is pretty' on it. Over the top is an open purple vest and she has a pink, red and orange crystal necklace around her neck. Her teeth are bright white and her eyes are forever glowing like fire. If she ever dies, they would burn out and return to their natural colour, a pale green. Some of her accesories include a backpack that seems to have INFINITE room currently holding a limitless supply of dye and cookies, a black guitar with a purple flame painted on it, and a large, imposing silver sword.
Weaknesses: She's a slow runner, she has a history of falling over nothing, she can be rather indecisive. Can't balance... Scared of heights... Scared of falling... Scared of drowning... And can't swim very well, so tends to avoide swimming.
Skills: She can set stuff on fire... And psy-blast... And sing really well. Oh. She always has dye with her if you need it. Mainly red dye... And she has good skills with a blade. And a guitar.
Likes: Sasha Nein (Dibs on him if Psychonauts characters come into this), Razputin Aquato, Psychonauts, Lucasforums (What can I say? MOST OF YOU GUYS ROCK!!!)Green Day, Music, Bonus Stage, fire... And psychic powers (YUSS! My online identity who you know me as IS in fact psychic!!! But she can only use pyrokinesis and psy-blast) warm colors.
Dislikes: School, working, homework, chores, water.
Personality: You should know what I act like by now!!!
Pyro sat and stared at the screen, her eyes glazed over.
"Oh man, another PM from someone. I get so many... Not really," She mumbled. The little voice inside her head shuffled around weirdly.
"Okay, time to see if it's another insult," She mumbled, clicking on the link in her e-mail and looking at the page.
"Wait a second..." She mumbled.
"TIM SCHAFER HAS A LUCASFORUMS ACCOUNT!?!?!" She cried.
"That's scary..." She mumbled, clicking on the button to read the message entitled 'help'
"He's... Being attacked by anti-tim? Weird... I thought Smon just made it up," She mumbled, scanning through the message. At the bottom, after explaining the help he needed, it only said, 'PM someone'
"WHATEVER YOU SAY TIM!!!" Pyro yelled, rushing off to the boards to post her message.
As she reached the off-topic board, she noticed something. It was... deserted. Normally, this was the time everyone was on, but... Nobody was... She was scared.
"Hello?" She thought, clicking on a topic.
"Man, this is... Eerie," She mumbled. Suddenly, some form of magical thing happened and Pyro found herself in cyber space.
"Ooh fun," She mumbled. She looked over to her left and saw a guy attacking pop-ups. He stopped attacking abruptly, and began to follow a cat-girl around. Pyro recognised the girl immediately.
"Hey Mashi! Hi!" She called, running over to said cat-human hybrid.
07-30-2006, 04:06 AM
Appearance: Too damned sexy to describe.
Weaknesses: Fanny Packs, mesh clothing, Gemma Ward
Skills: fashion sence, Napoleon-like dance moves, a feirce strut
Ave then walked in on everyone convo.
"Yo? What's shacken' my homies?" she said.
07-30-2006, 04:39 AM
"Oh. Hi Darth," Pyro mumbled. Fiddling with some fire she had conjured up.
07-30-2006, 04:49 AM
Pyramid Head swung around and killed another pop-up, as spyware came flooding out of it as it died. He walked away, once again.
07-30-2006, 04:51 AM
"PYRAMID HEAD? OMG! I haven't seen you since 'The Hunt is On.' Dude, where ya been?" Ave said, running after pyramid head.
07-30-2006, 05:11 AM
Pyro blinked. She felt left out, due to the fact no-one cared she existed.
"I'm sad..." She sobbed, sitting down.
07-30-2006, 08:35 AM
Name: St. Jimmy
Age: Not sure...
Gender: So damn male!
Apperance: There aren't very many clear photos of me but I have large white wings on my back and I always seem to have a white 'censor' line over my eyes. I'm tall, have dark hair, and I don't wear a shirt.
Habits:I tend to look down whenever I walk. I really don't give a **** what people think and I REFUSE to be a victim of authority. I represent the needle in the vain of the establishment. There's more but I won't bore you with Green Day quotes. (Go listen to the song.)
Strengths: Incredibly Defiant, Strong, Will stand up for anything I belive in, Am allways on a rush, Won't take **** from anyone!
weakness': Can't handle Authority. An ex-girlfriend called Whatsername.
Skills: I'm a badass.
*Is wandering aimlessly* *See's Mashi* "Ooh, a Cat person hybrid thing! that's pretty hot!" (heh.) *follows mashi*
07-30-2006, 02:24 PM
Mashi hadn't been paying attention for awhile. "What? Huh? Oh ****! There's more people following me!" She started having a anxiety attack. "Steve sent you all, didn't he?" She shouted off the cliff. "**** YOU STEVE!"
She turned around, her bi-polar disorder making her happy. "Hey, guys," she said, waving. "What's up?"
Suddenly a flier flew into her face. "Hey, Smon started a thread!"
07-30-2006, 10:32 PM
Taking heed to Smon's reply, Mayhem maximised her yahoo page, and with a deep breath ... she opened the link.
"Hey You!" her mother called from another room.
Mayhem flipped her head in her mom's voice's direction, "I have a real name ya knwo-ahh! oh shee--"
Her computer screen glowed a strong but soft white. And like that, the world around her, namely her room, faded away in the blinding white. She felt as if she was falling...And like that, she just stopped. Mayhem was utterly confuzzled. She was in a... where was she? It was white and featureless, like floating in a pool of milk, just that it didn't smell so bad. And off in the distance, she saw Smon, Jimmy, Avery, Pyramid, Pyro and Mashi, "...So she really IS a catgirl.."
Just then, a familiar sultry, disembodied voice thundered, "hello ther mayhem, this is the voice of the Rapid Transit System. I can take on other voices to--"
"JOHNNY DEPP!" Mayhem pleaded.
"Fine," The RTS spoke in his voice, "This is cyberspace, and you got here with some fancy device with a really long name created by Proffesor Farnsworth. It is accesible even though the proffesor is from a different dimension as all the websites in the world, even from other dimensions are interconnected. You just cant access the ones from alternate dimensions as they are deep-web sites to us. Look deep-web up on wikipedia, I dont feel like it. Anyway, everyone here has gotten the PM, and as soon as you can all get it together we should be able to teleport you to whereever you are needed."
But Mayhem wasn't listening, she was too busy chatting it up at this point.
07-30-2006, 11:04 PM
Ave stood inside the interweb. "FINALLY I CAN HAVE SOME REAL FUN!" She surfed over to google and googled google.
07-30-2006, 11:08 PM
Mayhem turned her attention to Avery who was uh websurfing, "hey Avery! You gonna help us kill that uber-jerk, the Anti-Tim?"
07-30-2006, 11:17 PM
Mashi became logical all of the sudden. "Ave, there's a internet crisis going! And you're going to look up google on google!? Dude, I could've told you what google was. Or a google. Which is a really long number beginning in 1 and has one hundred zeros trailing behind it like eggs to Yoshi."
Then she realized something. Her tail twitches when she realizes something, plus she gets that "OHSH33T!" expression on her face.
"Did we make that journey to Smon's thread yet?"
"No," someone said.
"Well ****, man. Let's go do that."
THEY WENT ON A LONG PERILOUS JOURNEY TO THE LEGENDARY KINGDOM OF H-ANN ...I MEAN THEY TOOK A BRISK WALK SMON'S THREAD. [Stupid lack of strike-through tags.]
"HI SMON!" Mashi shouted unnecessarily. "Sorry, we're late. But we're here now so get to debreifing. Even though we already have a vague idea what's going on. But go ahead and tell us your plan."
Steve was there.
07-30-2006, 11:21 PM
"OK! Let me google image search some weapons for us!" She typed in weapons into the search bar and pulled out a flamethrower, a few bombs, and some weapons from Halo 2. "I'm so set!" Ave yelled, holding a covenent carbine.
(Actually I think there are delicious doughnuts strike-through tags...)
Smon was sitting in his thread waiting for someone to read it. It said:
"Okay, here's the plan:
Step 1:Find the Weinermobile
Step 3:Stop Anti-Tim"
07-30-2006, 11:27 PM
Mayhem googled herself some pics of kickass guns. Afterall, who needs courage when you have a glock? Stuffing her guns and katanas into a backpac she had googled as well, she turned to Smon, "Okay, shouldn't we teleport to San Fran then? The disembodied voice said we could and thats where DF studios is."
07-30-2006, 11:31 PM
"Already there." Ave said, dressed in SPARTAN armor. "I even have Cortana!" She yelled. Ave popped out of the internet and out of the computer at Doublefine's headquarters. Then, Scott Cambell walked by.
"uh, I think your looking for Bungie's headquarters." he said to Ave. She pulled out her energy sword and stabbed him. "That's for straying off storyline in recent updates. I wanna hear more about captain." she said, walking off.
07-30-2006, 11:38 PM
[Agh! The dreaded s! Thanks Smon. If only there were scantly clad amazon women delicious donuts.]
Mashi googled her friend Lena (http://www.deviantart.com/view/29566516/). "Lena's here because I can't kick ass and she can. She's a demon."
"Chyeah. I can use magic and summon zombies and junk."
"Demons vs. the other kind of evil. It'd totally work."
"Or," the lemur continued. "We might team up and destroy all good video games ever."
And awkward silence. Mashi burst out laughing.
"Yeahhh, that'd never happen. You're generally light-hearted, Lena."
"Hehe, yeah." To her dismay, Mashi was still laughing. "Shut up, Pinky."
07-31-2006, 04:35 AM
Jimmy finally followed Mashi to Smon (He got sidetracked once or six times on the way) and was falling in love with Ave 'cause of all the HALO loving that was going on, When he suddenly realised Mayhem's old Avatar was back! "YAY!!!" he screamed like only a deranged saint can. Googeling DragonBallZ He empowers himself (joking joking) :blast5: But anyway, He' stocking up with even MORE HALO weapons (and Billie Joe's electric guitar 'Blue') When he see's a fly and gets distracted, and while wandering off says absentmindedly "I'm ready to go when you B****es are..."
07-31-2006, 07:59 PM
"Hey, wait up for me you guys!" Mayhem yelled as she saw someof her friends fade away. Pouting, Mayhem checked her backpack quickly, "Kay, katana, dagger, glock, spitting-hydra from R&C, ammo, 5 medpacks, hmm...I should bring a laptop if we need to get somewhere on the go..." And so she did. But that didn't mean she knew how to teleport.
"Need some help?" The disembodied voice teased. Before Mayhem could snap back though, she felt the world give way beneath her feet, ("Hurry up Jimmy!") and a large room full of computers and Pnauts memorobilia faded into view. She stumbled before she fully realized where she was. DF studios!!!
"You're finally here," Avery said. Mayhem nodded and looked around,
"Is this everyone so far? Shouldn't there be more people here?"
Avery shrugged, "Some poeple dont bother to check their PM's. Who's still missing anyways?"
Mayhem counted on her fingers, "Well, Smon is missing and Jimmy is on his way...someone's coming"
"Who's there?" a strange voice asked, Mayhem craned her head and saw a redheaded man who looked alot like Fred stare back. "Are...are you supposed to be our fans?"
"yup" Avery nodded. The man groaned, "We have a sexy pandagirl and a vampire..elf...thing...but we still need more"
At that, Avery reached for her sword, and Mayhem bared her teeth,"I'M NOT A VAMPIRE! It just happens that us elves have pointy teeth, kay? Ande besides, some other people are on the way"
The man shrugged, "If thas' what ya say. My name's Manny, see? your's?"
"Avery," Avery grumbled.
"Call me Mayhem," the elfgirl said.
"Your plan?" Manny asked tartly, "Do you have one?"
"Hmm?" Avery turned "Oh, Smon is working on it. So far we have 'Step 1:Find the Weinermobile, Step 2...um? and Step 3:Stop Anti-Tim.'
Manny sighed and slapped his forehead with his palm, "...great, wayda go, Tim...ya know, if you needed help planning this out, you coulda PMed Tim for intel and help and stuff."
That called for a chibi-moment.
(St Jimmy and ja'll better hurry up, this Manny d00dR is a jerk!)
07-31-2006, 08:16 PM
"Ha ha! vampire!" Jimmy laughed only to be looked at evily by Mayhem.
"Well, I'm here now.. so... Hey a new guy!" *Looks and points*
*Get's filled in on the situation by Avery*
07-31-2006, 09:25 PM
Manny groaned, "nNw we have a guy with wings...we have the weirdest fans..."
Mayhem smirked, "Just wait till you see Mashi and Pyramid-Head!"
"Whatsi and who-head?"
the 3 just rolled their eyes.
(w00t! this is my 200th post! Can I get a wh00p-wh00p?)
Suddenly one of the computer screens glowed and a DF worker ran from it screaming, Smon leaped out yelling. "I'm here too! Yay for me!"
07-31-2006, 09:55 PM
Mashi stumbled through the portal, landing face down on the ground (like Tony in the Mark an' Tony intro, still smiling and everything) while Lena flew in all graceful-like, because she had wings and could do that.
"Mashi, where's Pyramid Head?" Mayhem asked. "And who's THIS?"
"I introduced you guys to Lena like TWO MINUTES AGO."
"As for PH, I have NO IDEA."
The lemur was still floating nearby, looking around the offices of Double Fine. "Nice place you got. When can I summon a legion of the undead?"
07-31-2006, 10:14 PM
*While playing 'Blue'* "So, what do you guys wanna do while we wait?"
"I suggest something with kittens"
08-01-2006, 10:01 PM
Manny groaned once more, "A catgirl, a lemur, and another otherwise normal dude jumping out of the DF PCs...we have to work on our target audiences...alot..."
Everyone glared daggers into Manny, who didn't seem to care a single bit. Just then, a frazzled looking woman with red hair scrambled in, "Bad or good news, take your pick, but the Weinermobile has been spotted by the docks!"
Smon cried, "To the Anti-Tim mobile!"
Did that happen? No.
Avery rolled her eyes,"We never googled one, 'member? And besides, Pyramid's still not here."
Another one of the PC screens glowed, and something leapt out. No, not Pyramid. "Ow!' Mayhem yelled as she felt a dull pain hit her back and force her to the floor. Getting up, she saw a rock with a smiley face on the ground next to her,"...Dammit, Steve's here!"
That prompted Mashi to yell, 'NOOOOOOO!!!!!!'. Mayhem threw Steve to the ground, "Well, as soon as Pyramid gets here and we kill Steve, we should find a way to the docks. Wanna split a cab?"
08-01-2006, 10:32 PM
Pyramid Head googled for twin spears and another Great Knife in the mean time, and he dragged both spears along over to the gang. "Grhgrhg," he said. Another Pyramid Head had been googled out too.
08-01-2006, 10:52 PM
"THAT'S Pyramid-Head?" Manny gasped. The gang snickered at his shock. Pyramid seemed ready to dice Manny up into little peices with his sword, but was stopped by Mashi, "Later, we have a cab to split and a Weinermobile to catch."
Mayhem nodded, "That's everyone, then. Heyyy...since he knows more about this freak car then us, shouldn't we get the chance to talk to Shafer himself?"
08-01-2006, 11:53 PM
"Right..." Manny stood around for a moment and coughed only once. "Follow me."
They walked past many cubicles, walls covered in pictures of the MOST EXCELLENT GAME and people who waved until they stopped on a great door, designed with carvings of past Schafer characters in almost a cathedral-ish style.
"Nice door," Lena said almost sarcastically. Or maybe it was. "When do we get in?"
"Um...doorbell!" Manny pushed a button on the side of the door that made a weird *didllililililDING-DOOOONG!* sound.
"IN A MINUTE! Geez." *thud* "Damn footstool." *click click* *door opening noise* "Hey, Manny...these the LFRD guys?"
"Sweet! Come on in guys, I got hot cocoa and cookies."
08-02-2006, 12:00 AM
Ave then appeared in front of everyone, 5 shades oranger.
"You look like a brunette oompa loompa." Smon said
"I know. I hate the beach." Ave replied, getting into a bathtub of soothing aloe stuff.
5 MINUTES LATER!!!
"Ok. I'm ready again." Ave said, back to her normal pale state. she grabbed a shotgun and preped to fight anti tim.
"What happened to your armor?" Mashi asked.
"I had to ditch it. Cortana was being a bitch."
08-02-2006, 12:10 AM
Jimmy (wearing Darth's old MJOLNIR armour) headed straight for the afore mentioned cookies. Packing a Pistol and blue. Sat down in the corner (out of boredom) and waited. (just like a good saint should)
08-02-2006, 12:15 AM
Then a call phone rang. Avery picked it up. "Hello? Okay, okay..mhmm...buy."
there was a pause
"My mom just called. She wants-"
"your mom just called." Mashi interrupted
"Nice. she's gonna help us destroy anti tim."
"She's going to send me a box."
"Filled with what?"
"I don't know, but it's coming via UPS."
Then Dale Jarrett drove by in the big brown truck and gave Ave the box.
She opened it and inside was the magical weapon. Silly string. Cans upon cans of silly string.
"They must of had a sale!" Ave yelled.
08-02-2006, 12:19 AM
"Um..." Tim interrupted as everyone seated their rears and helped themselves to cookies and cocoa, looking very fangirl/boy-ish prepped to SQUEE!, "We dont really know where the Anti-Tim is yet. He keeps hopping back and forth between dimensions. So far, we've only been able to use that freaky transport device that Farnsworth made to teleport to locales in our world. Without the proper tech, we can't dig up deep-web portals. The tech that can and does is very complex. Not so as C++, but our programmers would have to learn another computer language."
"So what then?" Smon asked.
Tim shrugged, eating another cookie, "But that Weinermobile would be a start. It has tracking devices, which explains how it knows where our employess are so it can terrorize them. And that tracking device would lead us straight to the bad-evil people-d00derz controlling it. And they'd be close to Anti-Tim without a doubt"
Mayhem licked her lips free of crumbs, "The Wienermobile is apperantly by the docks, according to this redhead."
Tim's eyes narrowed, "Then to the docks you must venture!"
Mashi said, "Umm...how? We still don't have an Anti-Tim car, and I have yet to see any cabs we can split driving through the streets from the windows."
Tim nodded, "If it's an Anti-Tim mobile you need, it's an Anti-Tim mobile you get! Manny, take them to the garage!". He tossed a set of keys to Manny.
Manny grunted and left the room, beckoning the others to follow. No one left right away, there were autographs to get. Descending down a thin elevator, the gang found themselves in a dim parking structure. manny grudgingly pointed to a car.
It. Was. Awesome! Much like the Batmobile, but with enough notable differences to prevent copyright-infringment. For example, the big DF on the doors. Or the 2HB looking all badass on the hood.
Mayhem w00ted, and pulled out a bow and a slingpack of arrows, "Tme for me to do what elves to best: shoot random things using utter proficiency with pointy sticks!"
*cue Batman action sound*
08-02-2006, 12:20 AM
"NIce!" Jimmy had shedded the armour. "It hurts my wings... SILLY STRING!!" "WOO!! Now we have everything we could possibly need!"
08-02-2006, 12:24 AM
"Except a clue or logic!' Mayhem replied. Somehow, Steve ended up driving. What a crazy world we live in. With a screeching sound, ther ATM (anti-Tim Mobile) skidded out of the parking structure (Mayhem making sure to make a face to Manny), ready to meet with the monster car.
"How is Steve driving wihtout arms?" someone asked.
08-02-2006, 12:32 AM
How is anyone living without wings? Jimmy demanded.
08-02-2006, 12:34 AM
'How can anyone live without wicked elf abilities?" Mayhem retorted.
08-02-2006, 12:46 AM
"That's true. Give me some." He said around a mouthfull of cookies. "So, when are we getting there?"
08-02-2006, 12:53 AM
Lena simply responded, "Steve's possessed. But only speaks in Mashi's head."
"SHUT UP, ASSWIPE." Mashi threw a rock at the cat-driving rock.
"Hey hey hey, save it for the Wienermobile."
"You're using your awesome demon powers on it, remember?"
"No. I don-" Lena's long lemurs dropped in shock. "Oh...god." One cocked back up and fanned out. "Does anyone hear that?"
A haunting tune filled the salty air. "My bologna has a first name, it's O-S-C-A-R. My bologna has a last name, it's M-A-Y-E-R! Lalala~!" (Because I forgot the rest.)
Mayhem readied her bow. "I'll try and shoot the driver...if there is one."
Mashi came back from throwing Steve in the ocean. "That'll teach that- oh, we're being attacked?"
"PANIC TIME." She ran and hid behind the Anti-Tim Mobile.
"What a loser," Lena said, pulling a staff out of nowhere. "Let's do this."
[EDIT NOTE: Jimmy, we're already there.]
08-02-2006, 01:10 AM
Mayhem held her breath to steady her aim, and focused her vision on where the driver should be. A chill went up her spine, "...No one's driving it." The ATM swerved violently, now hidden by a large dumpster.
"A Change of plans then?" Smon asked.
"---," But Smon was cut off when the Weinermobile changed tune, though the recording that 'sang' the song sounded echoey, and diabolical, as if a chorus of mutated, dead orphans were the ones chanting, ..."Oh I wish I was an Oscar Mayer weiner, for that is truly what I'd like to beEeEeEeEeEeEeE, for if I was an Oscar meyer Weiner...everyone would be in love with me..." The final note held too long for comfort, a bone-chilling laugh at it's heels.
The engine roared thrice, St Jimmy and Smon smacking their heads with their palms at once. But Jimmy explained, "He knows we're here, and he's calling us out."
08-02-2006, 01:21 AM
"I'm going out there," Lena said.
"YOU'RE CRAZY!" everyone whisper-shouted.
"Hello? Does everyone keep forgetting I'm a DEMON?" She whapped a nearby forum-goer with her staff. "I have freaky demon powers and freaky demon wings and freaky demon horns and a freaky demon attitude of being a freaky demon. We all clear?"
"Cool. Now let's do this like Brutus!" She jumped out from behind the dumpster and was instantaniously run over. But not all *SQUISH'D* or anything, she actually flew into the windsheild. "OOF!"
Wienermobile drove around in circles for a while. Lena shook her staff. "I command thee, vile automobile! Stop your stupidness at once and OBEY M- AAAAUUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHHHH!" She was thrown off into the dumpster. "Hey, I didn't finish the incantation! CURSE YOU WIENERMOBILE!"
Mashi blinked. "Well, Lena's down. Who else wants to go?"
08-02-2006, 02:04 AM
Pyro was all alone... So she dialled for pizza! After eating it all, she went back to feeling lonely. Opening up a random hole in the fabric of space and time, she warped to where the others were gathering. As she arrived, she leapt up into the air, after noting the sucky entries of the others, and fell down whilst flipping. She landed head first.
"I'm OKAY," She mumbled, walking over to Mashi. She noted the bemused looks from everyone else.
"And before you say anything, I am an ELF. Not a vampire, or a cat-human hybrid. Do not state otherwise,"
08-02-2006, 02:08 AM
"Ha Ha!" *Raises hand in the air.* "I say Miss Mayhem aims for one of the tyres while I shut that ****ing speaker up..."
"but that doesn't solve our problem Jimmy" Mashi pointed out.
"It solves MY problem!"
*smacked over the back of the head by Smon*
"Ow! okay then, What should I do?" *grabs some of Pyro's pizza..*
08-02-2006, 02:12 AM
"What do we do now?" Ave asked, silly stringing the weinermobile.
08-02-2006, 02:17 AM
"Guys, we need to battle this thing with the power of sheer rock!" Mashi waited for a response. "That means 'Smon, challenge it to a Guitar Hero duel.'"
08-02-2006, 02:17 AM
"Oh man! I forgot all about the silly string! okay, what we need to do is make a silly string bomb! You have to tie a few cans together, make a fuse, and have a good aim! The problem is I don't know where to aim if there's no driver..." Jimmy raved excitedly.
"My goodness Mashi! I'm here and you want SMON to be the challenger?!?!?!?!? good idea." *hands Smon blue.*
08-02-2006, 02:19 AM
Okay, so how do I delete this post?
08-02-2006, 02:22 AM
(St. Jimmy, NO DOUBLE POSTING. There's a edit button on the bottom of your post.)
08-02-2006, 02:31 AM
Pyro stared at Mashi, before bursting into a large, toothy smile.
"GUITAR HERO!!!" She screamed, opening up another hole in the fabric of time and pulling a guitar out. She played a few chords, before looking at Jimmy.
"What did you say?"
08-02-2006, 02:34 AM
What we should do is, find Billie Joe if you're looking for a guitar hero that isn't me or Smon...
08-02-2006, 02:38 AM
"Who needs guitar hero when you have A BOOMBOX!!" Ave pulled out a boombox that began playing 'We Will Rock You'
08-02-2006, 02:40 AM
Pyro started laughing, before beginning to play 'Whatsername' on the guitar.
08-02-2006, 02:42 AM
"Who needs a boombox when you have a $100.000 Sound system in your CAR!?" *goes to fetch his Monaro full of wonderfullness and begins playing Homecoming very VERY loudly.*
08-02-2006, 04:28 AM
Pyro started to dance, before switching the song to 'Whatsername', because she loves that song.
08-02-2006, 04:58 AM
St. Jimmy switched it over to Hitchin' A Ride and was hardcore gettin' into it when it dawned upon him that none of this had anything to do with the story.
So, back to the action...
08-02-2006, 05:06 AM
Darkness suddenly fell and Pyro lifted a torch under her chin.
"We defeat the Anti-Tim," Everything became light again.
"And tehn we have a party! With QUEEN and Green Day and... Panic! At the Disco," She laughed. Everything fell dark again.
"No seriously, we have to defeat Anti-Tim,"
08-02-2006, 05:16 AM
"Yes we do. I just don't know how. I still like my Silly string idea..."
08-02-2006, 05:23 AM
"Hey... How bouts we use our magical powers and or other things?
I mean, I can set stuff on fire, Mashi can... Scratch them to death and you can beat them with that guitar,"
08-02-2006, 05:29 AM
*horrified gasp* "I would never do such a thing!" *brandishes guitar*
08-02-2006, 05:45 AM
"EEEP!!!" Pyro screamed, ducking and throwing her hands out in front of her.
"If you dare try, I'll... Set you on fire. Or something..." She mumbled.
"Just, don't kill me!"
08-02-2006, 12:55 PM
(Note: I'lll be camping a couple of days and wont be back till Fri. Just take me along with you since i wont be able to manually follow anywhere we go. Nature skeerz me)
Mayhem loked out of the windows, "if you let me out near a fire-escape, I could get to the roof and shoot out the tires so it can't try to run us over."
And so it was. Just not as intended, for they merely pushed mayhem out of the car, forcing her to scramble to safety. She did get to the rooftops though.
(note#2: being an elf with no sillystring, I fight with guns and bows/arrows from a distance and usually never upfront, trying to avoid close combat)
08-02-2006, 01:56 PM
Mashi can... Scratch them to death...
Mashi held up a paw and tried to retract her claws. "Uh, yo. Declawed."
Pyro raised an eyebrow. "What catgirl in their right mind gets declawed?"
"The ones that misuse them for self-defense purposes. There was that one time when-"
Mayhem interrupted. "No time for stories. Why have we been DAWDLING for the past...minute? WE NEED TO DEFEAT THE WIENERMOBILE!"
Wienermobile honked. (Translation: COWARDS!)
Lena poked her head out of the dumpster. "I AM NOT A COWARD."
Wienermobile honked again.
"DON'T YOU DARE MOCK THE KA'FIYM NAME."
Wienermobile honked "La Cucaracha." and drove around in a circle.
"RAAAARGGGGH!" And then...Lena battled the Wienermobile again.
Mashi whapped Smon, Jimmy and Pyro. "That could've been you guys! Lena was an hero!"
08-02-2006, 04:16 PM
"You know what. Let's finish this thing." Ave said, pulling out a crossbow. She began to board the bus when a small tan/green thing popped out. "OHSNAP EL CHUBACABRA!!" Ave then ran off.
08-03-2006, 02:09 AM
Pyro stared blankly at the chaos unfolding.
"Oh shiznit, my lawyers will kill me if I don't show up in court tomorrow defending my case as an 'innocent', and that I haven't killed anyone," Pyro said, her eyes shifting shiftily.
"I mean, I didn't set anyone on fire on PURPOSE," She said. She received blank stares from Mashi and the others.
08-03-2006, 02:19 AM
"Wow!" Jimmy remarked. "So many of us are really stupid. I mean, I can't think of ANYTHING productive (except pizza) Lena keeps getting pwned by the wienermobile, Ave's run off, Mashi's been declawed, Smon's done nothing and the only one of us who IS doing anything is sitting up on top of a building!"
*Mashi smacks Jimmy again*
"shut up moral lowerer!*
*Jimmy rubbed his head where scratch marks should have been*
"I'm just Saying!" Jimmy whined while taping Silly String cans together.
08-03-2006, 02:25 AM
Pyro giggled, setting Jimmy on fire.
08-03-2006, 02:34 AM
"AH! MY WINGS!" Jimmy yelled "Do you have any idea how much they stink when they burn!?" (Note: seriously, go outside and burn some feathers.) "Believe me I know!" He went on... He was getting ready to backhand Pyro out of rage when Ave caught his hand and scowled "don't be stupid. We need someone to set things on fire."
"But I can do that with my mad little lighter!" Jimmy pulled out his wicked little cigarette lighter. "yes, but Pyro doesn't need a lighter, and we need someone who THINKS fire..." And with that, Ave ran off again.
"Fine." Jimmy sulked, nursing his scorch marks.
08-03-2006, 02:40 AM
"HEHE BURN!!!" Pyro screamed, setting Jimmy on fire again, and then shooting him.
08-03-2006, 02:42 AM
Mashi thought. And thought. For a long time. Suddenly, she came up with a conclusion.
"Why don't we all lure it into the ocean? Cars can't drive in the ocean no matter how hard they tried!"
08-03-2006, 02:44 AM
"Sounds... Delightfully simple and good!" Pyro cheered, poking Mashi with a stick.
"But they can fly. If he drives it into the ocean he may have a jet mode attached to escape."
08-03-2006, 03:17 AM
"Good point Smon," Pyro sighed, stopping with the stick-poking.
"What we need... is a Phantom Zone projector. It can trap him with villains almost as evil as he is."
08-03-2006, 04:15 AM
"Yes, yes." *brushing charcoal off of self* "Phantoms are good. Zones are pretty good too. Projectors are alright." At this point Pyro was coming near him with a flame. "OH HELL NO!" St. Jimmy yelled and smacked her upside the face. "Owch!" she rubbed her face and shot him again. "I say we try for the ocean approach." Jimmy scowled. "Jet-mode or no, we can allways try. Plus it's allways fun sinking evil cars." He said over a mouthfull of pizza.
"I think you misunderstand. The Phantom Zone Projector is a powerful tool used by superheroes to trap villains in a vile dimension parallel to our own, one way in, no way out. The ocean plan may fail, but the PZP can't."
08-03-2006, 04:41 AM
"Oh don't worry, I understand. I just think it would be funnerer if we sunk the car. and if it failed (which it prolly would knowing I'm helping) we could use the Zoney thing!"... "what!?"
08-03-2006, 04:45 AM
"Can't I just kill this guy?" Said Chuck Norris.
"NO!" Smon yelled. "You're too powerful. You could create a universe of destruction with one swift roundhouse kick. The world would implode!!"
"Yes. Now you pet some puppies and then destroy them. Norris AWAY!" Chuck Norris then flew off.
"What'd I miss?" Said, Ave in a jedi costume.
"You change your clothes. A lot." Mashi said.
"You know, I just have to find the right thing."
08-03-2006, 05:29 AM
Pyro got out some dye and began to dye her hair.
"You dye your hair a lot," Mashi mumbled.
"I know," Pyro sighed, throwing some blue highlights into the mix.
"And DONE," She cried, revealing her now blue and black hair.
"Anyway, I reckon Smon's right. Just one thing," Pyro sighed, darting into a nearby set of toilets and changing clothes.
"I have to wear this," She said, stepping out. She was wearing the same trackpants, but now she had red goggles and a green striped turtlneck with short sleeves.
"So I like to change clothes. Who cares?"
08-03-2006, 04:13 PM
"Hey! Those are MY goggles." Mashi whined as Lena stumbled out of the dumpster.
"Did someone say PHANTOM ZONE PROJECTOR?!" the lemur said, pulling said machine-thinger out from behind her back.
"Where did you get that?" Smon asked.
"I found it in the dumpster. Dumpsters are miracle-making machines."
"Dumpsters aren't machines," Mashi corrected while she was wrestling her goggles off of Pyro.
"Whatever. I still found the thing. BE HAPPY!" She threw it in the general direction of Smon, assuming he knows how to use it.
"EXCELLENT! I do know to use it! It's very simple, red button is imprison, green button is communicate, and blue button is release, AH CRAP." he pressed it and General Zod leaped out of the Phantom Zone "I AM FREE." he then flew away. "...we'll worry about that later."
08-03-2006, 10:25 PM
*Gasp!* "All hail the dumpster machine!" Jimmy intoned. "And Smon, Who knows how to use the confusing thing!"
08-03-2006, 10:55 PM
"We're never getting into this bus." Ave said, in a bunny suit.
"YES WE ARE!" said a booming voice
"FOR GOD SAKES NO!"
Tim than jumped off the roof or DF, wearing his pinstripe suit.
"What are your powers Tim Gunn?"
"Gunn?" Smon said. If you mess with the Gunn, your gonna get shot."
"EXACTLY! I'm gonna open the door for you guys."
"KILLER QUEEN!" Ave yelled in a Wonder Woman costume
Tim than used his fashion ray to open the Weinermobile door. "Carry on!" He said. Then he hopped into his Saturn Sky Roadster and drove off to Parsons.
08-03-2006, 11:16 PM
"Have you guys noticed how Ave seems to attract randoms alot?"
A bolt hit the seat just as the door opened and everyone looked up and remembered that Mayhem was still there.
"Anyway," Jimmy went on, "If Ave can get people here all the time then so can I!"
*St. Jimmy rips through the fabric of coolness and pulls out...* "A Spartan!" He yelled.
"okay MC, You have to go and 'commandere' that Wienermobile!" Jimmy ordered.
"But I'm not-"
"I don't care just hurry up!"
So the Spartan (who's armour was a strange tinge of blue) carefully approached the vehicle. and was immediately run over.
"What!?" Jimmy yelled. "Hey what's that writing hanging in the air? 'H377R4I23R was splattered by the Wienermobile?' Oh, Bloody hell! I just got a n00b killed from a multiplayer game!"
"So what now?" Pyro asked.
"We chew ass and kick bubble-gum." Smon said, loading a chainsaw and starting a shotgun. "And I just ran out of ass."
08-03-2006, 11:54 PM
"I get the good randoms. You have to have the hook-ups. and to get the hook-ups, you need the skills." Said Ave, wearing a Dr. Z costume. "And to have the skillz, you gotta have the wardrobe. i'll show you. CA COOO! CA COOO!!!"
Then a bunch of owls flocked to her. "We need you to get on the Weinermobile and peck out the windows. Then fly in and drag out anti Tim. If you want some mice, You'd better do this right."
So the owls did what she told her to. They flew to the bus, remensicient of 'The Birds' and pecked out the windows. then the hundreds of owls flew into the weinermobile and dragged out the evil Anti Tim!"
"OHSNAP OWLS!!" he yelled as he was dropped into the street. Ave pulled out a bucked of mice and yelled "GO FOR IT BOYS!" At which the owls began to feast on the many rats.
08-04-2006, 12:18 AM
"I am SO GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS FOR PLAYING THAT BLOODY MUSIC!!!!!!!!!" Jimmy psyco-screamed. Miss Mayhem was suddenly with them again. "No you're not." she said. "We need him."
"For WHAT!?" he said irately, still advancing
"Not sure yet."
"Just a little ass-kicking?" he asked patheticly.
08-04-2006, 01:29 AM
"THE WIENERMOBILE IS COMING THIS WAY!" Mashi shouted. "SMON, USE THE FORCE...I MEAN PHANTOM ZONE PROJECTOR. That's what I meant to have...said."
Smon spun around. "Wha- oh!"
The Wienermobile closed in on the group...
08-04-2006, 01:30 AM
Suddenly Pyro noticed something.
"We need a role-play draw out! Something to make this cooler and longer!" She yelled, setting Jimmy on fire.
"Like what?" Phil, who had suddenly came from the BS universe, asked.
"OMG THAT IS NOT THE REAL ANTI-TIM!!!" Mashi screamed.
"Like that!" Pyro cheered.
"And now we continue with the story," She concluded, setting Jimmy on fire again, because he had returned to normal.
Smon saw the Weinermobile and noticed the big glowing red light on the front. "HIT THE LIGHT! The rest of it is indestructible! I know this because I played Contra and Megaman!"
08-04-2006, 03:11 AM
"Okay!" Pyro yelled, shooting the light. It snarled at her, before it curled up and died.
"Hooray!" She cheered, before poking Smon.
"You're cool," She mumbled, before setting Jimmy on fire YET AGAIN.
"Yes, I am that's why I won the Fonzie for "Coolest Nerd" in 2003."
08-04-2006, 03:24 AM
Lena gonked. That is a word, apparantly. "What about that plan we had sending the Wienermobile to the Phantom Zone? Huh? HUH? HUH?!"
"SHUT UP LENA," Mashi replied. "At least the Wienermobile is gone. NOW WE MUST GO FIND ANTI-TIM'S EVIL HEADQUARTERS."
[This should be long and full of awesome!]
08-04-2006, 03:25 AM
"Nice," Pyro mumbled, shooting Jimmy in the head.
"WHY WON'T YOU DIE!!!" She screamed, setting him on fire to finish him off. He immediately came back to life.
"Darn, I forgot pyro can't directly kill ordinary people," She laughed.
"I'll just have to find another way..." She hummed, poking Jimmy.
"So, anyway, what should we do now?" Suddenly, pyro's bag vibrated.
"Oh my god! Raz just texted me! He's in trouble! The REAL anti-Tim is attacking him and Sasha and Lili and most of the Psychonauts!!!" Pyro cried.
"Why do even HAVE a phone to communicate with fictional characters?" Mashi asked.
"No time to explain, we have to hurry," Pyro mumbled. She pulled her top away, revealing a spiderman outfit.
"I'm spiderman," She mumbled. Mashi gave her an odd look.
"How are you..."
"Just joking, I'm only Pyro," Pyro chuckled, magically changing back into her old outfit.
"Let's go save the world or something,"
08-04-2006, 04:01 AM
Mashi started crying for no reason. "Why is she more insane than MEEEEEEE?"
Lena...didn't bother to comfort her at all. She's a demon. Comfort isn't her shtick. She flew somewhere...probably to Denny's.
"Hey, let's go to Denny's," someone said.
08-04-2006, 04:05 AM
"So does that mean I can kill this bitch?" Jimmy paused momentarily from kicking the fake Anti Tim's ribs. *starts readying some plasma grenades* "And I'm not an ordinary person." He backhanded Pyro.
08-04-2006, 04:08 AM
"NO!!!" Pyro screamed.
"I gotta go save the entire Psychonauts universe!" She screamed, pulling a jet pack out and shooting off on it.
"Wow... That was random," The still-alive Jimmy sighed.
"Huh... jetpack..." Smon starting yelling at the sky where Pyro was last seen. "You know I carry a portal there at all times right!?"
08-04-2006, 05:13 AM
"Nope," Pyro mumbled, jetting back.
"Why'd you come back?" Jimmy asked.
"Because," Pyro mumbled, landing next to Smon.
"I need a little thing called HELP to defeat Anti-Tim," She finished, before quickly dyeing her hair again, this time into pink and red stripes.
((500TH POST OH BOY I FEEL LOVED AND STUFF!!! THANK YOU FOR BEING SO NICE EVERYONE HUGS AND KISSES XOX PYRO HOORAY!!! :D))
08-04-2006, 05:37 AM
"So, how exactly are we supposed to help you, my jet-packing friend?" St. Jimmy asked exasperatedly.
"Quiet while I dye my hair." (there was brown in there somewhere now.)
"Actually, Jet-packs are pretty fun Smon." Jimmy realised aloud as he was touching-down.
"Yeah... jet packs are cool and all..." Smon said gently hovering into the sky. "But kinda useless when you cna actually fly..."
08-04-2006, 05:49 AM
"Hah! Yeah, BEHOLD THE WINGS!!!" Jimmy said lamely and showed everyone his awesome wingspan.
"Cool eh? I don't really use them for flying though, It's very tiring."
08-04-2006, 05:50 AM
"Want a cookie?" Pyro asked for no reason whatsoever.
"Hah! Yeah, BEHOLD THE WINGS!!!" Jimmy said lamely and showed everyone his awesome wingspan.
"Cool eh? I don't really use them for flying though, It's very tiring."
"See, I can just levitate. For I am... *rips off clothes only to reveal identical set of clothing underneath* VOCABULOR!"
08-04-2006, 06:47 AM
Pyro magically shot up into the air. WITHOUT her jetpack.
"Wow... I think I just passed my LEVITATION MERIT BADGE TEST!!!" She shouted. Suddenly, everything went dark and an instrumental came on. A podium was raised from the ground, and Pyro went into the official Psychonauts pose. A sheet came up, and a signature was scrawled across it. A badge came flying through the air, and lodged itself on Pyro's backpack. She smiled, before flying again. Everything went back to normal.
"Wow, that was... Kinda cool," Pyro mumbled, flying again.
"I guess I don't need THIS!" She cried, heaving the bjetpack off elsewhere.
"Now where were we?"
"You were about to give me twenty bucks."
08-04-2006, 06:53 AM
"No I wasn't!" Pyro shouted. A bemused smile came over her face.
"We were gonna go fight Anti-Tim!" She yelled, lowering down to the ground and poking Smon.
"You're lucky you haven't pushed my self-destruct button yet."
08-04-2006, 07:04 AM
Pyro stopped poking Smon.
"Okay, I won't poke you then,"
08-04-2006, 11:12 PM
~I'm BACK! You can either cheer or scream 'noooooooooooooooo!!!!!'. I expect the latter. *Sniffles* I missed out on so much! I regret going now...not like I had a choice...~
Mayhem 'ha-hummed', pulling out her laptop, "The Weinermobile is dead, and what a show that was...too bad I didn't bring popcorn. You'd be amazed at the wonderful views one gets from the top of a warehouse roof...Anyway, we should report back to DF now. Or at least find one of those programs that can decript sites that are deep-web so we can teleport ourselves to the Psychonauts universe."
Pyro nodded, "Being random is still more fun, but the Psychonauts world has to be even zanier than this."
St Jimmy didn't look at all thrilled, "...My feathers will burn even more there for sure..."
Mayhem then realized, "Wait, how can we tell what universe a site is from?"
Smon did that whole mysterious chuckle, "Hehe, easy. All we have to do is look up the official Whispering Rock website. What self-respectin camp doesn't have a website?"
08-04-2006, 11:26 PM
"Camp Wannaweep!" Jimmy said in reply to Smon. "But then again it's not really very self-respecting.. Pizza would be great right now. !!PIZZA!!" He shouted, and pulled some pizza out of the fabric of coolness. "Damn! this is good." he chewed. However he got depressed quickly 'cause he just realised he hadn't contributed to the story at all... "Damn." He mumbled andd sat down on the ground.
08-04-2006, 11:32 PM
Mayhem patted Jimmy's back, "that's okay, it's better than almost dying out in the wild."
When can we teleport to the Pnauts world!?" Someone screamed.
Smon removed his fedora and it became a big swirly vortex of DOOM... and Psychonauts.
08-05-2006, 12:40 AM
Everyone felt all floaty as they got sucked into Smon's eternal vortex of eternal doom...and Psychonauts in his eternal fedora of eternal doom...and Psychonauts.
"Why didnt you say you could do this back with Tim!?" Mayhem realized.
And with a loud 'pop', the swirling colors of the world faded away, replaced with the scene of a very familiar camp.
"Whoa!" Mayhem gasped, "My proportions are all squished and I look all Psychonauty! Ugh...that sounded wrong..."
After a while of oohing and ahhing, the group remembered their purpose. But not for long. There were many distracting shiny things. Then...a fahreaky noise. There it went again! Everyone went into defensive mode, keeping an eye on a shivering bush.
And then...out popped a little blue kid in a red jumpsuit, "AHH! Don't hurt me! You're not with that scary lady that came here earlier, are you?"
"What?" Pyro asked, "We're not gonna hurt you...alot...maybe..."
"What scary lady?" Mayhem asked the trembly child. He regained his composure and spoke in a soft voice, "I think she called herself...Tammy Shafer or sumthing..."
"WHAT!?" everyone screamed.
The Anti-Tim was a WOMAN!
08-05-2006, 03:31 AM
"Woah!" Jimmy was still a bit spaced out after the whole teleporty thing.
"Blue kids? Women? RED jumpsuits? The kid should be shot!" The child shied away.
"Good one Jimmy!" Miss Mayhem whispered angrily.
"Who wears RED jumpsuits?!"
"It doesn't matter! He didn't do anything wrong."
"Yeah,... well.., He wore a red jumpsuit! And that's wrong!"... "Owch!"
08-05-2006, 09:06 PM
Realizing who it was, Pyro smiled.
"Ello, Dogen," She mumbled, poking him.
"Careful, I might explode," He mumbled. Pyro smiled. Suddenly, out of the woods came... SASHA NEIN.
"OMFG IT'S SASHA NEIN!!!" Pyro screamed, running up to him and hugging him.
"Save... Me," He gasped, just as she let go.
"You WILL stay here, Sasha, or I might set you on fire," Pyro mumbled, making a fireball appear in her hands.
"But I'd just..."
"Aww, good Sasha," Pyro chuckled, patting him on the head.
08-06-2006, 01:53 AM
having heard the commotion, a frantic Milla came rushing to the scene, "You kids better not be trying to sneak outta camp over the parking lot gates ag--ah!". The gang looked at her in disbeleif, Milla staring back
"Who are you people and what are you doing in this top secret fecility! You better give me a good answer!" Milla said at last, unable to look away from the choking Sasha and elfgirl patting his head and not sure what to think of.
Mayhem raised a hand, "Actually, we are touring the campgrounds, some of us are interested in joining and the rest have relatives who could benefit from the uh, training. yeah, thats right."
Milla calmed down and a smile graced her lips, "Oh? I didn't know that you were supposed to be here, not aware of your appointment. Sorry for the misconveniance. But unfortunately, we are not taking any more pupils from this day, seeing as Whispering Rock may not be in use as soon as the program ends this week." She said the last bit with a sad tone and a crestfallen expression.
"What do you mean?" someone within the group asked.
Milla sighed, "A woman came by earlier today in regards to the deed of the camp. You see, the camp is owned and founded by Ford Cruller, operated my Morcuea oleander, thus it is titled a government facility as I stated earlier, though it is privately owned. But this woman...Tammy Shafer says that the camp will be closed down, since Ford Cruller is not in the best state of mind and probably wasn't when he bought the land. She says that this means that the deed to the camp is up for grabs, and that she would like to buy it herself."
"How evil!" Pyro growled, finally releasing Sasha who was now sputtering for air as he inched his way to Milla.
He breathed heavily, "Evil? I haven't even seen the woman nor met her, and her argument seems awfully valid."
Milla continued, "This is especially distressing since some of the children have gone missin. As much as I want them back since I simply love those kids, missing children doesn't help our case much."
Mayhem pondered for a moment, "How 'bout we help you find them? My, uh relative...yeah, thats right...deserves to come to a place such as this!"
Sasha and Milla raised their eyebrows, huddling together to discuss the proposition.
"They certaintly are a unique...interesting bunch." Milla said softly.
Sasha adjusted his shades, "Interesting' doesn't even begin to describe them, but look at me; I have green skin and the extra help would be of use."
The two looked back at the group, "Why not? We need the help"
08-06-2006, 02:01 AM
"Aww..." Pyro sighed, taking a rope out of her backpack and tying it around Sasha's shoe, before attaching a padlock to it.
"Stay," She firmly said, before turning to Milla.
"What Miss Mayhem said is true. I really wanted to come here, as you will see, I'm kinda like, a psychic, and I can't do much other than set stuff on fire..." Milla stiffened at the mention of it.
"And, shoot stuff, and fly," Pyro sighed, before turning back to Sasha.
"Good boy," She mumbled, hugging him. Sasha groaned, before turning to Milla.
"Help me... Milla..." He hissed. Pyro smiloed at Milla.
"Wait here, I gotta go change into my 'ACTION GO' outfit," She laughed, running into the toilet, changing quickly, and coming out dressed in an outfit not unlike a Japanese schoolgirl's. Her hair was dyed purple and black, and she held her guitar.
"So, what should we do to help?" Pyro asked Milla.
"Tell us and we'll do it. But in return, give me Sasha,"
08-06-2006, 02:03 AM
Sasha raised a finger in responce, But Milla forced it down, "Some of the kids are missing as we've said, we could use the help finding them."
"Guys! I figured out what Tammy is up to!" Smon said urgently.
"We know," Mayham interrupted, "She wants to shut down WR."
"Wha?" Smon said and looked down at his notepad that simply said Dracula with an underline underneath it. "Er... right!"
08-06-2006, 02:09 AM
"But what would shutting WR do? If she really wanted to make a difference, she'd try to bring down something bigger." Mayhem then thought aloud.
Smon continued, "First of all, thinking out loud is not cool, second of all, did you forget the missing kids? It's like a mystery that uh...I cant think of anything witty. Sorry. But if WR is shutdown, that means that Ford would be booted out and Tammy...could hack into the Pnauts mainframe computer jabberwocky from his sanctuary or sumthin?"
"She could just want to ruin Tim Shafer's creation" Avery said.
Smon sighed, "Whatever sounds cooler is the truth we will acknowledge. it's called Wikiality."
08-06-2006, 02:10 AM
"I knew all this would happen. Hence the ACTION GO outfit," She chuckled.
"But something I don't know. Is Mikhail here?" She asked, beginning to pull a ball and chain out of her bag.
"No, sorry," Sasha grumbled.
"What about Raz?" Pyro asked. Continuing to pull the chain out.
"Uh... I think so..." Sasha sighed.
08-06-2006, 02:15 AM
Then...Mayhem was attacked by a bear. Reviving, she cussed, "DAMMIT! If Tammy is gonna kidnap something, why not the bears!"
"Can't you charm animals into doing your bidding?" Jimmy asked.
"Yeah, but it doesn't work if I'm bein smacked upside the head and getting pwned!"
"What going on?" A familiar voice said at last, going visible, "What's this I here about WR shutting down?" Lili!
08-06-2006, 04:09 AM
"It's a Lili!" Pyro cried, running up to said child and poking her.
"She's squishy!" Pyro cried, before yanking Sasha over.
"Where's Raz?" Pyro asked Lili, before pointing Sasha at her.
"If you don't tell, I'm going to make him set you on fire, and then pick your smoking carcasse up and throw it for a bear to eat," Sasha grimaced as Pyro waved him about, further explaining how she would punish Lili if she didn't share the secret of where Raz was.
"And then I'll make the cougar cough up your blackened remains," Pyro finished. Lili glared at Pyro.
08-06-2006, 10:32 AM
Ha Ha ha.. heh... *moan* "I'm so out of my depth here." Jimmy said flatly, not unlike the way I just did...
08-06-2006, 02:33 PM
"Ok! I've got a plan to save whispering rock and stop this Tammy person!"Ave yelled
"Go on." Sasha said
"Alright. We're gonna have to get inside the mind of this Tammy, track her down. When we've infiltradted the inner workings of her brain, then we shut it down, put her in a coma or somthing."
"Yeah, but we have to find her first." Mashi added.
"Uh, find a fingerprint and clairvoyance."
"...we are dumbasses."
"I know." Avery said, holding Elton's arm. "We're goin' down to the lake."
08-06-2006, 03:56 PM
Even though Mashi had said only one line of total relevance, she was still staring into the clouds, trying to find the one shaped like a two-headed baby. Lili, however, had finished glaring at Pyro (because it wasn't worth it) and wandered over to Mashi.
"...WHY ARE YOU A CAT?"
Mashi looked down, and suddenly her eyes gushed with happiness. "OH MY GOD, YOU'RE MORE ADORABLE IN REAL LIFE." She scooped Lili up in her furry white arms and hugged her. "Lena, can I keep her?"
"Lemme think..." Lena said sarcastically, rubbing her chin. "No."
Lili's eyes begged the lemur to force the catgirl off of her. She would've actually said that (and she did) but I already wasted it on the action.
"Sure. Mashi, put the little human down."
"D'awwww." She set Lili down on a nearby rock where she sat and blinked for a while.
Then she spoke. "Thanks, lemur-lady. And...I better go find Raz." She glared at Pyro whilst exiting. "I got my eye on you."
Mashi followed her, also walking backwards-ish. "Water triiibe!" she whispered, flashing a few gang signs. Lena pulled her back and threw her in a tree.
*THUD!* "MEOW, I'M A CAUGHT IN A TREE!"
Lena laughed. "That's the first time she probably meowed."
08-06-2006, 10:08 PM
And then Grud popped out from behind a tree for no apparent reason.
"GAH!....Oh, err, hello. I saw the PM and all of a sudden I was here."
Other Stuff: Glasses, tall, stonger than the average bear. Dislikes being killed without permission, and average bears.
"What did I miss?"
08-07-2006, 01:22 AM
"Actually, Come to think of it... You actually missed quite a bit! None of which I had anything to do with." Jimmy realised. "I had Pizza?"
*Goes off and tries to get the whole tree popping trick happening*
08-07-2006, 03:18 AM
Ave was now standing next to Sasha.
"Hey Sasha, I read your blog."
"Really? The LJ one?"
"Awesome. I freggin hate abnormal shampoo."
"LAUGH OUT LOUD!"
quietness, however ave broke it.
"silence....of the lambs. Wanna go watch that?"
"HELL YES!" Sasha said. "Hannibal Lector is so 1337."
"He's hot too. In that creepy way."
"Totally. I'd do him."
"Hold up. You said you wern't gay, or an S&M enthusiast."
"Everyone's a little bi."
"True. Let's go." Then everyone went to watch Silence of the Lambs up in the lounge.
08-07-2006, 04:26 AM
except Jimmy who was busy trying to think of ways to make himself usefull.
08-07-2006, 05:21 PM
Mayhem lost all interest in the current situation, deciding that the tweeting birds had to die by her bow and arrow. Also the squirrels cuz they were being jerks. Milla shrugged and walked away, followed by a sighing Lili that followed. They reached the main-lodge together, Milla walking upstairs in search of somthing and Lili heading to the tv lounge.
"LILI!" Raz cried, grabbing her wrist and commencing to shake her by the shoulders, "Something wonderful, fantabulous and AWESOME to da Xtreme has happened! Bobby has gone missing! Me and the remaining kids are gonna throw a party."
Lili was about to say something in responce but Milla rished down with a pen and a few papers in hand, "Bobby? I don't mind much really, but this is nothelping in our defence against this Tammy Shafer person. Raz, Lili, if you don't mind, please take these items to these people waiting in the parking lot."
"Huh?" Raz asked, "Why? What do they lookk like and who is Taammy Shafer?"
Lili tugged on his hand and led him to the gang in question, "You can't miss them, there's a guy in a fedora, another with wings, a strong-dude, another with a sword, a demon-lemur, two elfgirls, a furry and another who's watching a movie plus this rock with a crayola smiley face. They're weird even by our standards. As for Tammy Shafer..." Lili filled her confuzzled BF in.
(We need someone to be Raz!)
08-07-2006, 06:16 PM
"And last I remember, the catgirl was thrown in a tree," Lili said, wrapping up her story as they arrived in the parking lot with the stack of papers.
"Oh, she's still there," Raz said, pointing at Mashi, who promptly meowed again. Lena was still LMFAO-ing.
"That's SO rich!" Lena perked an ear at Steve. "I know!"
Lili cleared her throat. "Hay, guys. We have paper things."
Mashi jumped out of the tree to see what. (Lena suddenly became sad. "I know, Steve. That was weird.") "Is this like- HEY IT'S RAZ." She hugged him.
"STAY FOCUSED!" Lena shouted, tossing Steve at her head.
08-07-2006, 08:31 PM
Lili cleared her throat, "Though I'm not sure how much help it will be, i can feel someone's mental signature on these things. A woman, so i suppose Milla gave me a few items that Tammy Shafer came in contact with."
With another cold glare, she handed the pen and stack of papers to one of the elfgirls, "If Tammy Shafer is related to the dissapearinces and this helps find some of the missing kids, leave Bobby Zilch behind please."
08-08-2006, 02:35 AM
Pyro sniffed. She was all alone in the world. Except not really. So she flew to the main lodge where she found Darth and Sasha on the beanbags watching Silence of the lambs.
"YOU STOLE HIM FROM ME!!!" Pyro screamed, pulling Sasha away from Darth.
"Come, Sasha. Let us... Uh, do stuff," She said, pulling Sasha out of the room.
"But I want to talk to..."
"No buts. You are going to help ME save the world," Pyro grumbled. Sasha grimaced, hanging his head. Stepping outside, everything was quiet.
"This is very peculiar..." Sasha mumbled. Pyro glanced arund, before seeing someone hiding in shadows which had somhow appeared.
"Who are YOU?!?!" Pyro called.
"No! Not maths! It is my BIGGEST WEAKNESS!!!" Pyro screamed, crumpling to the ground.
"Haha," The cloaked figure laughed.
"No!" Sasha called as the hooded apparition telekinetically lifted up Pyro and carried her away. Sasha, being the responsible adult he was, decided to follow after them... Yes, folks. Pyro had been kidnapped by Anti-Tim.
08-08-2006, 06:00 PM
"This calls for action!" Ave yelled wearing a Hannibal Lector costume. "I must eat someone! Specificaly the Anti-Tim!" She ran after Sasha and Pyro.
08-08-2006, 09:06 PM
"What's going on?" Mayhem thought aloud once more. She, the rest of the RD gang, Lili, Raz and now Milla rushed to the source of the noise. What they saw froze them in their tracks. A hooded, feminine figure with long dark hair had Pyro! Feeling rushing back to their legs, they chased after the Anti-Tim, only to learn she was quite the fast runner. They sped after their quarry until they reached a lake, Tammy grimacing at her misfortune. A dead end and being surrounded at once!
Pyro whewed in releif and looked haughty with relief for a few moments, smiling at seeing her kidnapper ready to get what she had coming, seeing as the gang was ready to face off with whatever weapons they could get their hands on. Tammy turned, and they truly saw her for the first time. She was tall with pale skin and raven-black hair that went past her shoulders and concealed an eye. Her facial features were sharp and ruthless. Her thin, purple lips curled upwards in a smile as she raised a hand...and snapped her fingers.
At the sound, Bobby, Elka, Phoebe, Kitty, Maloof, Chloe and Chops jumped down from amongst the treetops and crowded Tammy.
Elton peered from behind a tree, "Hey...it's...it's..."
"The Missing kids!" Milla and Sasha yelled, sending psi-blasts to Tammy's way. But it didn't hit her. it hit...Kitty!? She had valiently stepped in the line of fire, now doubled over in pain. She raised her head and mumbled,
"No one harms our mistress."
This took everyone by shock, and Raz said, "Look at their eyes, they're all glowy and stuff, Tammy must be using mind control!"
"How observant," Miz Shafer said in a sultry voice with another cheeky grin, "Hairboy and Hairboy number 2...take them!"
Bobby and Chops advanced upon the group, going invisible and attacking with a barrage of psi blasts. Getting their grips together, no one was able to get a final glimpse of the Anti-Tim and her fellow goons who had simply vanished along with Pyro.
08-08-2006, 10:26 PM
Elton was standing in front of Darth, getting ready to fishslap her.
"ELTON I'M SORRY!" Darth yelled. She lunged at Elton and began to eat his face, Lector style.
After elton's skeleton was vistable and everyone had stopped looking at Ave in horror, Ave ran after Schafer, carrying Elton's carcass to burn in traditional jedi manner.
08-08-2006, 11:30 PM
"I'm going to help Ave!" Jimmy yelled unnesesarily. with that, He ran off in the wrong direction.
Elton was standing in front of Darth, getting ready to fishslap her.
"ELTON I'M SORRY!" Darth yelled. She lunged at Elton and began to eat his face, Lector style.
After elton's skeleton was vistable and everyone had stopped looking at Ave in horror, Ave ran after Schafer, carrying Elton's carcass to burn in traditional jedi manner.
"...ya know, considering the damage done, it might just be a better idea to just break the disc in half."
08-09-2006, 12:01 AM
"But that's not the jedi way." Ave said. She trekked through the woods, following the footprints. You think they'd be smart enough to levitate, but no.
(Smon, where do you find the highest post count thing?)
08-09-2006, 12:07 AM
Mashi jumped back in the tree to hide as Lena lunged at some kids with her staff. She ended up being surrounded by five of them. WHAT WILL SHE DO?
She'll pull out her first super-cool demon move in the entire RP, that's what!
Dropping her staff, she spread her arms and wings wide open and closed her eyes. A pillar of purple flames appeared around her. As suddenly as they appeared they were unleashed onto the attacking students. The words "K.O. X 5" appeared somewhere.
"I'd call that Elegant Spinning Destiny, but that'd be stealing." She flew up in the tree and dragged Mashi out.
"No, I wanna stay here."
"TOO BAD!" She threw Mashi at another kid.
08-09-2006, 12:19 AM
Jimmy returned with some berries he found. "THIS IS A JOB FOR!!!! someone else." he said and kicked the nearest person.
08-09-2006, 01:02 AM
"Battle scene?! OH NOES!! Time for me to do my part!" Triumphently announced Grud.
And with that, he somehow managed to float into the ground.
But as soon as he did, he heard a loud booming voice that declared,"YOU CHEATED!!"
And Grud yelled back at the voice, " Oh come on! If they can use the internet for weapons, why can't I turn on noclip mode? Fine, be that way."
And with that Grud went to google, and he shall return in a few posts time.
08-09-2006, 01:31 AM
Oh Shnaps, battle scene! Mayhem and Lili turned to look at the other and nodded in silent agreement. Bobby lunged at them but Lili set up a shield. With a 'bonk!', Bobby learned of it and slowly got up, only to be rained down upon with a volley of arrows shot by Mayhem. What followed was uber violent and shouldn't be read by young kids: it was like :smash: and :blast5: :fire2: :blast9: :lazeye: :firemad: :lsduel: and even some :cowdance . Weird. And Violent(tm). Too many smilies!!! Bobby was relentless though. Beggining to feel drained, Mayhem and Lili prepared for a final attack. Lili set up a small illusion, being all she could muster. A soft column of light spiraled around her and Mayhem, brightening till it was too bright to look at. Bobby shielded his eyes, and when he could look once more, Lili was alone. Slightly confused, he froze in 'though't. "HEEEYAHH!" He heard from above. He was dumb enough to look and met with the sole of Mayhem's white boot. He was now down for the count. Mahem and Lili high5ed, only to realize that Chops was beggining to trudge their way. Shooting at him a bit, Mayhem looked at Lili, "We should RUN now, Tammy's gettin' away!". And so it was.
"Like I said, the portal I have only leads to my copy of the game, we break that in half, the jedis get pissed over me killing... what thirty innocents? Then we go home and wait for this whole thing to blow over."
((Right here Darth. (http://lucasforums.com/memberlist.php?postslower=0&postsupper=0&ausername=&homepage=&icq=&aim=&yahoo=&msn=&joindateafter=&joindatebefore=&lastpostafter=&lastpostbefore=&order=DESC&sort=posts&pp=30<r=)))
08-09-2006, 02:15 AM
"WHAT!?" Mayhem cried from a treetop she had climbed to escape the sluggish, bighaired Chops, "That's all? Wait, someone obviously has to leave to break it in half, but even if we all left with you, Tammy still has Pyro! What will happen to her when you break the disk?"
"And me?" Lili actually whimpered, "Will I die? And what is this I hear about all this only being a game?"
Fourth wall breakery!!!
"WHAT!?" Mayhem cried from a treetop she had climbed to escape the sluggish, bighaired Chops, "That's all? Wait, someone obviously has to leave to break it in half, but even if we all left with you, Tammy still has Pyro! What will happen to her when you break the disk?"
"And me?" Lili actually whimpered, "Will I die? And what is this I hear about all this only being a game?"
Fourth wall breakery!!!
"I feel a need to explain, don't worry, I played Black and White AND Actraiser," Smon cleared his throat. "You, and everything you know, are but a game in our universe called Psychonauts, logically, if we leave Tammy here and break the disc all reality will corrupt, so you may live, but much more likely you will die. However it would still be a good idea to get Pyro out first." Lili looked sad. "And only one of you can leave with us, since we need a soul-weight to counterbalance Tammy's destruction."
08-09-2006, 02:55 AM
Pyro randomly bit Tammy, causing her to be dropped. Staggering away from the crazed evil woman, she began to feel dizzy. Randomly falling about, she walked along, before stopping. She was being mind-controlled. Walking towards the edge of a waterfall that Gruducuuz had accidentally googled into existence (Let's just say it came under firearms for some reason) Sasha, Mashi and Smon noticed and let out a scream of NO!!! But it was too late. Pyro walked over the edge and plummeted to the bottom. The group gasped. Because, being real and stuff, not a bunch of pixels, she was, well... Kinda dead.
BUT ALAS! Her spirit randomly came out of nowhere!
"Hey guys, what just happened?" She asked, shrugging.
"Uh... You... Just... Died," Sasha sighed. Pyro chuckled.
08-09-2006, 06:34 AM
"Ha Ha you're dead." Jimmy said "but still not a saint like me. what we need to do is one of two things, catch your spirit in a jar like they do to the poes in Zelda, or leave you here, or some cram your spirit into your body. Then, once that's all over we turn to Smon once again with his master plans."
08-09-2006, 01:05 PM
"I have returned!!" Yell Grud outside the camp gates.
A few seconds after being said, the camp gates were busted open by the most strange vehicle ever created... words can not explain it... (http://www.lexam.net/peter/carnut/hamburger-mobile.jpg)
But the thing drove through camp and right into Tammy, as she was powerless to stop it. Being it her one weakness,( Tim's weakness is the Wienermobile, so the opposite of a weiner is a hotdog, and the opposite of a mobile is a motorcyle!)
After being ranover several times, Grud realized something.
"It's not Tammy! It's the only councelor that hasn't been mentioned yet! I just ran over Ford Cruller in a dress and a wig! OH NOES."
After Ford being discovered, Tammy's link to him was somehow shattered, and everyone stopped fighting and stuff, but Lili still looked really, really, sad.
08-09-2006, 06:12 PM
Finally understanding what had to be done, Mayhem nodded and shot Chops in the head with an arrow, "Hey, you're gonna die anyway." She then nimbly jumped off from her perch in the tree, her crouched form and feet landing on Chop's bouncy hair, giving her enough of a boost to jump off and land safely. From there, she ran over to her comrades, "Kay, so they're gonna die and nothing can be done about it. Tammy Shafer has escaped and may not even be in this world anymore, we have to stuff Pyro's soul back into her body...crapperific(tm). If only we had that dagger from the Prince of Persia series...We could turn back time...wait, only 8 seconds, too late now."
08-09-2006, 08:05 PM
"Wow! I just had the best idea!" Jimmy was thinking again. "We have to go get the telephone booth from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure!" And upon saying jumped into a google screen.
"I'm Back! Hey guys check out this mad putty I got!.... Right umm the time machine booth." *jumps back into google*...*comes back out in the telephone booth.* "Got it!" He yelled from inside. "Okay, What we need to do is everyone get in here, It's a tight fit but it can be done. Dial the number for the Year, Date, and time and we should be able to go back in time just far enough to prevent the whole death of Pyro thing. OR we could just prevent a lot of things that shouldn't of happened! Who's with me?"
(Should make things interesting if there's agreement.)
08-09-2006, 11:32 PM
Grud then suddenly jumped into the phone booth, and then came back several seconds later, holding the severed head of a teenager.
"MWUAHAHA! EBAUMSWORLD.COM EXISTS NO LONGER!!"screamed Grud.
"Okay, what were you saying?"
08-10-2006, 03:03 AM
Mayhem beamed, "Not a bad idea! While I'm not sure how and when to use it to stop Tammy, it should be able to prevent Pyro's death! Just gimme a sec." She warped into google, reappearing shortly, but with a silver bluish dagger thing in her hand, and dressed as such (http://img366.imageshack.us/img366/2068/farah8qy.png).
"Give that back!" Said woman in picture snapped, followed by the generic but still angry grunts of this dude (http://images-eu.amazon.com/images/P/B0002YCSTU.03.LZZZZZZZ.jpg).
"Shnaps, canon cahracter invasion!" Mayhem squealed before pushing them back into a reality/dimension rift that opened behind them. "Well...'tis the dagger 'o time! Just in case..."
08-10-2006, 05:55 AM
Pyro glared at the people.
"But I LIKE being dead. I mean... Like, yeah," She commented. People looked at her funny, because of the fact she was protesting against being alive again.
"Well, hasn't ANYONE here read 'Always and forever'?" Pyro received blank stares from all but a few, who raised their hands slowly and shakily.
"I warped reality with that fan fiction. Now... Dead characters in the Psychonauts universe return to life," Pyro hummed.
"But the characters I killed off haven't died yet," Pyro finished, as Miss Mayhem glanced towards Sasha.
"In summary. I LIKE BEING DEAD. Other than the fact my eyes don't look like they're on fire, but hey," Pyro mumbled, shrugging, before flying through Jimmy, and setting a tree on fire with her mind.
"Look! I can still use Pyro! Total and utter love of being dead,"
08-10-2006, 06:54 AM
"uuughh.. Now I feel sick" *sits down in corner of phone booth*
08-10-2006, 07:32 PM
And Lili was...still sad.
Mashi went over to her and said "DON'T BE SAAAD!" in a high-pitched voice, reminiscent of Fyre of the Action Squad Detective Force.
"I DON'T LIKE YOU," she replied, totally NOT reminiscient of Spink of the ASDF.
Lena grumbled. "Mashi, leave the little human girl alone. She's SAD."
"AND I'M TELLING HER TO STOP BEING SAD." Suddenly, Mashi burst into flames. "AHAHH! FYYYREEEZZZ!"
Lili grinned at Lena. "I'm happy now." She glared evilly at Mashi. "|3UUUU|2N!!!!11!1 LOOLOL!!"
08-10-2006, 08:14 PM
Mayhem sighed and turned back time 8 seconds with the dagger, pulling Mashi away before she could be set on fire, making the last 2 seconds of the above post so they never happened, "M'kay, but a dead you still isn't as helpful as a living you, so GET INTO THE PHONEBOOTH!". Mayhem then tried to shove the protesting catgirl inside to little avail. Giving up, she crossed her arms, "Fine, but if we find out that Tammy is still here, we'll leave this world and smash the disk. And who knows what will happen to you if you're dead when that happens. So.." She turned to the rest of the RD gang, 'We've pretty much killed Chops and Bobby..."
"w00t!" Raz cried, while Milla and Sasha shook heads knowing that explaining the odd deaths to the kids' parents would be tough.
"...Tammy's gotten away and pyro's dead....So what's the plan?" She said at last, motioning to the phone-booth, Mashi's ghost, and then Smon's fedora.
08-13-2006, 04:06 AM
"WE PLAY THE ACCORDION!" Pyro screamed, yanking an accordion out of her backpack and beginning to play. After seeing the dissapproving looks from her elders, she sighed, and threw the accordion at Maloof, who either died or re-died, depending on how he was.
"Look, I might just have the easiest way to fix this in my backpack," She sighed, pulling a small box out of her backpack. Everyone gazed at it in wonder.
"What... Uh, is it?" Mashi asked.
"It's something special," Pyro mumbled, opening up the box and pulling an old lava lamp out. Rubbing on it, a purple smoke came out. It slowly formed to reveal an elegant purple genie, who smiled at Pyro.
"Hello Bianca," Pyro chuckled. Mashi stared blankly at Pyro.
"You have a genie?"
"You betcha! How do you think I got psychic powers, or elf ears?" Pyro laughed. Mayhem and Mashi shrugged.
"Exactly. Anyway, I have one wish left. You can tell me what I should wish for... What do you think? AND DON'T SAY TO BRING ME BACK TO LIFE!!!" She shouted, before smiling up at her genie.
08-13-2006, 03:00 PM
I would think the smartest thing to wish for would to be wish us all to have genies, so that's at least, umm, 15 or so trys to get Tammy. Or you could wish for more wishes.
08-13-2006, 09:20 PM
"Depending on the genie that's not allowed." Jimmy informed Gruducuuz.
Note: Hewo everyone! I'm gone for the week! BYA!
08-13-2006, 09:30 PM
suddenly, Ave fell from the sky and yelled "I WISH EVERYONE FROM BONUS STAGE WAS HEREEEEE!!!"
"Okay."Said the genie. Everyone who was ever in Bonus Stage poofed into Whispering Rock.
"WHAT THE HELL?" Smon yelled.
"Well, with these guys help, we can surely catch Tammy. Plus, I wanted to meet Keen." Ave picked up the ASDF and began snuggling with them.
"Hey, this doesn't bother me. OMFG RYA!!!!" Mashi that lept onto Rya, pretty much suffocating her.
Slim then landed on Smon's head and asked for him to buy a superphone. "Well, I guess this doesn't suck." Smon said.
08-14-2006, 02:16 AM
Mayhem went chibi, "...Mmmkay, I guess this could work too...Well, we should all poof outta here, if Tammy is gone."
A bruised and battered Raz raised a hand, "Even though two kids are dead, she left with all the others. Kitty happened to drop her friensdhip bracelet. He held it up for all to see, grinning from ear to ear. Lili nodded with another cold glare, "Use clairvoyance on it. We may get a clue as to where she is." Raz shot them a thumbs-up, concentrating on the bracelet, before he finally looked up,"...I'm not sure, but if this Tammy really is from a different dimension like you guys are from and say she is, she has to be there now. The environment is just too different from what we have, and there are alot of people, so you know. They are all tall and stretched out with tiny eyes.."
"That's our world all right," Mayhem interrupted, 'What can you tell us about the environment?"
Raz bit his lip in though, "Well, there are alot of bright neon lights that say 'Live, nude girl's!', and a pyramid with a light shining off the top.."
"Las Vegas!" Mayhem cried, "Now that we found her here, she abandoned her previous plans to shut-down WR, but took the kids with her to help her with her diabolical schemes! Now...should we take Raz, Lili and the Pnauts gang with us?"
08-14-2006, 02:51 AM
"Don't forget everyone from BS!" Ave yelled, hugging Keen. "You were so much cooler in 2 legit. Why'd you go and change?"
"Well, I had to be undercover at the band camp."
"Whatever, I miss your helmet."
08-14-2006, 02:58 AM
Milla and Sasha huddled once more, after a minute of whispering, they turned back to the group, "You can take Raz and Lili..."
Milla continued, "I suppose we owe you Sasha as well."
08-14-2006, 03:04 AM
"I guess we'll take Sasha. I mean, pyro's a ghost so there won't be any glomping. For Sasha, but still smoking is bad."
"How are we gonna get to Vegas?"
Craig pushed his way out of the crowd. "I don't............know."
"Hey, isn't Rya a jetpack?" Phil asked
"I don't know, let's just hop in my car."
"Your car must be huge."
"It's a PT crusier. We can make it work. Or we could call Donald Trump and ask to borrow his jet."
"Yeah, Ave. That's really likely."
Just than, Donald Trump's jet landed in the forest.
"That's convient!" Ave yelled. Then everyone hopped into the Trump Jet and flew off to vegas.
08-14-2006, 03:12 AM
The jet broke through the space-time continum, and within 3 short minutes, everyone was within their native (not counting the Pnauts gang) Las Vegas. w00t! Vegas! Gambling, drinking, gambling...um, and saving the world!
08-14-2006, 03:55 AM
Is Pyramid Head still around, even? Either way, he busted a move. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgDdMOBXt5I&search=pyramid%20head%20dance)
08-14-2006, 10:42 PM
[Wait, Mashi's dead? WHAT?]
Lena groaned. "This is getting stupid and weird and weirdly stupid and stupidly weird," she said, obviously using 'stupid' and 'weird' and 'and' too much in that sentence. She tapped her staff on the ground. "Are we going on with plot or not? There's no NEED for more teammates. Plus, they all look retarded."
"What are you trying to say while breaking the fourth wall, Lena?" Mashi asked.
"Are we going to save the damn Psychonauts world or not? Adding characters isn't HELPING! But I think taking them away would help. Plus, I'm a magical freaky demon so...yeah!" The lemur held up her staff and smiled evilly. "Can I? Pleeeeaaaaasssseeeee?"
[Sorry, I'm a bit angry at the WAY TOO MANY CHARACTERS. This goes on a list of stupidities as to why I leave certain forum RP's.]
08-14-2006, 11:50 PM
(Since my character seems to be gone forever I guess I'm out too.)
08-14-2006, 11:58 PM
"Fine!" Ave yelled. "I'll go. But you just watch Project Runway, Cause I'll be on there in a few seasons. Also for Kaybert." Ave hopped into a car and drove off.
08-15-2006, 12:07 AM
@ Cheez, the word everyone and everybody is used so that people dont have to manually follow to a different area. You are still here, but since you hadn't posted here in like forevurz, you didn't get mentioned much.~
Raz looked to Lena, "4th wall breakery?"
Mayhem grimaced, "it's nothing," she then turned to Lena, "I dont really watch Bonus Stage or wherever these new dudes are from, so if you poof 'em away, I wont be too mad."
Lili Was the only focused one, now bored with the new premise, "So Tammy is here, but can we be more specific?"
Mayhem turned and thought, "Well...this place isn't kid friendly, she'd probably have to lay low someplace less...adult. Circus-Circus seems like a good hotel to start. It's not far from here..."
"Is that a batmobile?" Lili asked, her figers pointing to...
"The ANti-Tim-Mobile!" Mayhem squealed, "What a stroke of good luck. Raz, Lili, be thankful you or your world wont die."
08-15-2006, 02:39 AM
Pyro sighed, before sighing again.
"I want my genie back..." She sighed, before noticing what the others were doing, and where she was.
"LAS VEGAS!!!" She screamed, before immediately rushing up to Mayhem.
"Will you come with me to the venician?" She asked.
08-15-2006, 03:15 AM
Mayhem flipped her head back, "SURE! I love that place."
"But the Anti-Tim," Someone whined. Mayhem wagged a finger, "Tammy is an adult, over 21. She cant resist some gambling, we might as well use that to our advantage!"
08-15-2006, 10:35 PM
Lena was bust sending the Bonus Stage characters to an alternate, hellish dimension when she heard that gambling was mentioned.
"G-G-G-GAAAAMBAHLIIINGK?" she gasped, zapping Craig into a portal. "I know, I know. We'll play roulette!" She pulled out a revolver. "With six bullets in the gun!"
"Lena, that's RUSSIAN roulette," Mashi explained, suddenly being smart. "You don't win money in THAT. Just death."
"Oh." She tossed the gun aside. It went off, casting a bullet into Mashi's leg.
"OH GOD, I'LL NEVER WALK AGAIN."
Raz groaned, kicked Mashi in the shins and TK'd the bullet out. "Anything ELSE you need?"
"Yeah, can you get me a-"
"No." He walked up to Lili and smiled.
"You know," she said to him. "I could've done that myself."
"Yeah, but, I...won or something."
"I guess. Have a silver medallion!"
"Why not gold?"
"NOBODY CAN HAVE THE GOLD MEDALLION! Now can we go do what we're supposed to do?"
Everyone left the...square I guess, leaving Mashi to wallow in pain. ...Wait, she's still in pain? What a wuss.
08-16-2006, 02:42 AM
Mayhem's eyes glinted, as she unsheathed the dagger of time, "Vegas, watch out. I have a wad of imaginary intarwebz money and a dagger that can remind time with full sand-tanks...this is gonna be fun. I suppose we can always catch the Anti-Tim later."
08-17-2006, 05:19 AM
"WOW Vegas!" Jimmy yelled as loud as he possibly could attracting surpriseingly few stares.
"This place Rawks all over the place! I vote POKER!!!!!! It rocks and I am the king at it."
Note: Seriously, I just bought some World Poker Tour cards today while I was on holiday.
"W00! Texas hold 'em here I come!"
08-17-2006, 02:01 PM
"If there is one good thing to come out of the game Oblivion, it is that homeless people see and hear everything. I'm off to question hobos." Announced Grud.
08-17-2006, 09:50 PM
At this point, no one cared about the Anti-Tim. Each walked off to whatever interested them. In Mayhem's case, it was the gambling.
"Yo you, kid. No one under 21 allowed," bellowed those annoying security dudes at her as she tried to enter. Mayhem grumbled, and grabbed the dagger. Wee! Slomo sequence! Mayhem casually sanutered past the man at normal speed, laughing at how funny his face looked in slomo. Wee! She was inside!
Smon was bored in Vegas. "Ya know what this place needs? DEADITES!" and thus a big portal into nowhere opened up and a bunch of fast zombies walked out. "Yay! I get to play Gauntlet!" and suddenly he donned Wizard gear and a mysterious voice rang out. "RED WIZARD HAS ENTERED THE GAME."
08-17-2006, 10:58 PM
"Zombies? In Vegas!?" Mayhem cried out. *little blinking flashbulb* She waited calmly at one of the slot machines, and sure enough the zombies invaded the Venetian.
"Halt ye! I command thee to break and rob doth slot-machines, give the coin-stuffs to me and you will get brains!". And sure enough, they listened. Pyramid grunted somthing unintelligable. Mayhem nodded no, "Of course I'm lying. I will take the money and then just shoot them afterwards."
08-17-2006, 11:05 PM
Ave than drove back.
"ZOMBIES?? Are they t-shirt zombies?"
"No." Smon replied.
"FOR GOD SAKES NO!"
"Ok then." Ave than drove off again after her brief cameo.
08-17-2006, 11:42 PM
There was screaming. Delish! There was violence. Double-Delish! Mayhem muahaha'd evilly as the zombies gave her the money. Life was good. Raz and Lili ran to her, panting and covered in what appeared to be bite-marks. Lili cussed, "Damn zombies! What do they contribute to the Tammy-Shafer search?"
"Absolutely nothing. But they are good minions and are an excellent diversion," Mayhem answered.
"We must save our Mistress!" Yelled a chorus of children in the distance.
"Hey, did that sound like the missing kids?" Raz asked. Mayhem pointed and the two looked. It was Tammy Shafer and the kids in front of the Pirate-Themed hotel! Batmobile time! Not really, the hotel was across the street.
Tammy Shafer fended off a zombie with her boots, then turned to the 3, "Unleashing a horde of zombies to smoke me out, eh (Off in the distance, Smon yelled , 'uh, YES!')? Not bad, but I will be like, so totally victorious!"
"I feel stupid," Mayhem sighed as Tammy ordered Phoebe to chew her leg, "A little help please!" Raz sighed, "You shouldda asked the others to help you, you get what you deserve."
"I am so gonna kick your ass once she chews my leg off and lets me go."
08-18-2006, 01:51 AM
Pyro sighed, kicking some pebbles down the street she had been left on. Then she remembered she was dead, and realized she wasn't kicking anythig, she was walking through stuff.
"Awww," She sighed as she saw the massive fun the others were having.
"They're all killing people without me!" Then she remembered something.
"WOOT I CAN DO RANDOM STUFF FROM DANNY PHANTOM!" She yelled, turning invisible and flying over to a casino. After stealing several things, she realized something.
SHE COULD DEFEAT ANTI-TIM BY HERSELF!
Flying up again, she brought out her laptop, which had magically got wireless internet, and used it to track Tammy Schafer.
"Oh my gosh!" Pyro yelled, after discovering where she was headed.
"Tammy's going to the Gold Coast!" She shouted, before realizing another something!
"I've got to go stop her!" She screamed, before flying at a billion miles per hour to the Gold Coast. During that time, she had PMed Smon and Mashi, telling them about where Tammy was.
08-18-2006, 02:45 AM
"California? Home!" Mayhem gushed as she she stabbed Phoboe with an arrow. "To the Anti-Tim-Mobile!" she screeched at the tope of her lungs. At a snap of the fingers, the ATM sped to her side, and of course, Steve was driving. Mayem hopped in, followed by Raz and Lili. "We are heading to Lalaland, peoples! Cant let Pyro have all the fun, I wansta kill her too!" she called to the other's, holding the door open so they could enter.
08-19-2006, 03:50 PM
Pyramid Heads had been following the WHOLE TIME with the unnerving noise of their swords scratching the ground. One of them was holding a dead guy. They often made puppet shows with corpses, for your information.
Headdy 2 held up the corpse and wiggled it to pretend it was talking. "Qfmurgl! Ngarghlig!"
Headdy 1 smacked him across the arm and 2 looked away sadly.
Then they hopped in the ATM.
Still holding the corpse.
08-19-2006, 06:24 PM
"YAY! Cali here we come!" Mayhem gushed, closing the door and pseeding off to her homeland.
08-20-2006, 04:45 PM
Double-post of double-doom!
Wait, I thought the Fedora of Doom could like, transport places and grumble/grumble. Meh, I just wanna be the person to hold the 200th post. I know, i'm a monster. Feel free to commence hating me.
08-22-2006, 02:29 AM
Pyro noticed nobody was following her.
"Oh man, they're heading to the wrong Gold Coast!" She yelled, slapping her forehead with her hand, which then passed through her. She quickly got her laptop out again.
"Mashi! Darth! Mayhem! Smon! Everyone else! Wrong Gold Coast! AUSTRALIA!!!" She typed, before sending the message out to everyone, and landing in Australia, at Dreamworld.
"We can't let you in there mam..." The ticket guy began to say.
"Two things. I'm dead, so try to stop me, and the fate of the world might be in my hands," Pyro shouted, before running through the queue and into Dreamworld, where she believed Anti-Tim may be.
08-22-2006, 11:09 PM
Mmm.. I was wondering which Gold Coast you meant.
"Ha ha!" Jimmy charged directly in the other direction to Pyro. " I do believe that i can get to the early morning markets at Berleigh heads! Maybe I can find some info there. and if not I'll at least get some useless ornamental crap!"
08-23-2006, 12:10 AM
Mayhem slapped her forehead, "NOES! We were so close to Cali...oh well." She clutched the steering wheel and jammed it in the right direction. Zip! Zam! Zoom! The ATM semi-gracefully flew to Australia. 3 min. later (the ATM is fast) she met up wiht Jimmy. Pyramid grunted to him. Mayhem nodded, "ditto. So, where is Tammy?"
"Idiot," Lili sighed, pointing to a burning building not too far off, "She's right there, can't you see her?"
"The ATM can fly?" he then asked. Mayhem shrugged, "it can also make killer chai-lattes."
"So..." gargled voices then rang through the otherwise still atmosphere, "You came back for more? Well, no one harms our mistress." THE KIDS!
"Mayhem tensed, "Raz, Lili, you take these dudes on, me and Jimmy here...and hopefull the others when they get here are going into Tammy's mind." The two nodded, commmencing an action scene too awesome and violent to type. Mayhem thrust the arrowhead on her quiver through the psi-portal Raz had handed her. She took aim at the ever-nearing Tammy's head and released. "&*%$!" She wailed. Mayhem rushed forward in time to be sucked into the madwomans mind, knowing she'd die pretty soon.
08-23-2006, 02:27 AM
Pyro heard the ping of an arrow from the other side of the Gold Coast.
"Those elf ears do serve some purpose," She concluded, before realizing what it meant.
"Pyro... AWAY!" She yelled, flying towards the sound of the arrow. Soon arriving in Burleigh Heads, she landed and got a psycho-portal out of her backpack.
"I didn't know I had one of these... ANYWAY!" She shouted, disappearing into Tammy's mind.
08-23-2006, 05:26 PM
"Pyro?" Mayhem gasped. "God, I feel stupid for entering, I thought you were already inside her mind. I shouldn't have come in eitherway, ducking and hiding is my thing..."
She sighed again as she stared into the twisted lanscape surrounding the 2. It was like a giant mall all decked out in Halloween decorations, but far more menacing and dark-looking. "GET OUT!" Tammy's voice boomed. Mayhem and Pyro flipped their heads about in search of Tammy's mental self. "Crappers," Mayhem groaned as she noticed her hand fading away, "I think she's still too strong to attack like this, she needs to be worn down further...I want my mama."
08-23-2006, 08:31 PM
Mashi and Lena arrived...yhei.
"What'd we miss?" Mashi asked.
Jimmy stammered. "I...I forgot."
08-23-2006, 11:40 PM
"Thank goodness you're here!' Raz stammered as he breathed heavily, "Tammy is setting the kids on us, and they're tough. Mind helping please?"
Thus began the ass-kicking
:blaze6: :lsduel: :chainsaw: and even some :cowdance
08-24-2006, 01:38 AM
Pyro watched the cow dance.
"Yeah, go dancing cows!" She called, before setting Tammy on fire. Tammy screamed, and Pyro cheered for no particular reason. Suddenly, a strange voice rang in from somewhere else.
"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" It laughed. Pyro hissed for no particular reason.
"I know that voice!" Mayhem suddenly exclaimed.
"COACH OLEANDER!!!" Jimmy, Pyro, Mashi and Mayhem yelled in unison. Oleander emerged from the flames Pyro had caused.
"I am the one behind all this!" Oleander yelled. Pyro stared blankly at him.
"That was MY line. Prepare to die, evil short guy... Or should I say... TIMOTHY JOHNATHON SCHAFER!!!" Pyro yelled. Everyone turned to her, wondering what the hell she was high on, or what she was on about.
(CUE THE BLANK STARES- Pyro)
08-26-2006, 01:24 AM
"You..." Oleander stuttered with a contorted face, a finger pointing to Pyro "DAMMIT! You are Pyromania? My AIM buddy? Shiznabbit, I should never vaguely reveal secret plans to total strangers on the intarwebz!" Pyro stared back blankly.
Mayhem (having been booted out of Tammy's mind) got up, disgusted to see how Lili or Raz had neglected to protect her body stuck in it's astral trance while her psyche struggled to stay inside Tammy's mind those few seconds. She was all covered in rubble and wine(?) stains, her jeans on fire. It would take FOREVER to get those stains out! Seeing as she had collapsed in front of (the rather woozy looking) Tammy, she 'eep!ed' and crawled away. "Not so fast!' snarled Tammy, a shiny magical-looking but probably fake staff thingy from the 99cents store cocked at her head. Mayhem pouted and crossed her arms, "Well then, it seems as if you're not even the Anti-Tim."
Tammy was taken back, "Wha?? Of course I am!"
"But...Oleander, um, I mean, Timothy..." Mayhem gasped, slowly inching away.
Tammy smirked, "You think there are only 2 universes? only 1 Tim Shafer and 1 Anti-Tim? Or course not, there are hundreds of thousands of universes/dimensions, half with a 'Tim Shafer' of their own, the other half 'Anti-Tim'. Me and him conspired, knowing it would only take two to ignite a chain revolution. As soon as we rid of this Tim, the one that had brought Timothy into his dreaded existance, all the other universes will begin to war themselves without knowing we were behind it! And soon, there will be no more creative games left, so us retarted game designers can keep rehashing tired concepts and get rich off it!"
Mayhem rushed back to her crew, panting and reaching for her bow. The others did the same with their own weapons. "I see..." Timothy/Oly said, "We have had just enough of you two, always getting in our way. This will end right here, right now."
Hey, this is gonna end at some point. It better end right, full of shiny explosions, accurate particle effects, rag-doll physics and more dancing cows.
08-26-2006, 12:41 PM
Grud then came out of freaking no-where, being followed by thousands of Tim Shcafers.
Grud then shouted, "You'd be surprized how many hobos know how to get to alternate realities, Tammy! Good Tims! ATTACK!"
And the war commenced.
(Someone else can describe it if they want this to be the end.)
08-26-2006, 03:54 PM
"Where the heck are we?" A 'Tim Shafer' questioned, before pointing to a Gamestop, "Quick, we must throw out all the crappy, unimaginative games!" Several of them rushed to that. "Buy plenty of copies of PSYCHONAUTS!" Mayhem screeched, "And half of you stay behind!" Half the 'Tims' returned, slightly dissapointed. Then one of them said, "Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...channel our creativity...blah blah blah... into hugeass gun...blah blah blah blah kill those two."
"You hop to that then" grunted Pyramid, though of course it came out as imcomprehensible grunts noone could decipher but still understood. "We'll need a little time," The Tim said. "We can weaken slash stall Morry and Tammy while you work on it," Mayhem replied, "Good idea, bty, Tim."
"The name is Tom. Tom Fasher."
08-27-2006, 04:06 AM
And so the war raged on, people hitting other people with spatulas, Tims, Toms, and Tams brutally murdering one another. Suddenly, Pyro thought of something. Charging over to Mayhem she began to blurt out her idea.
"We have to defeat them using the least imaginative thing possible... High School Musical songs," Pyro mumbled. Mayhem and Mashi mouthed the word 'No'. Pyro smiled softly.
"Yes, it's the only way," A million miles away, several babies began to cry.
"Otherwise the world shall end in flames and dust," Pyro announced, before breaking into a chorus of 'Breaking free'. About halfway through, Mashi started to scream.
"My friend Jo sings it a LOT. I don't like it Mashi, but it must be done!"
"I have an idea that doesn't involve brain damage! How about we trap them in a tangent universe? We just need to open a portal to a tangent universe, trap them inside, kill the living receiver, and boom. They'll be trapped inside and it'll collapse in around a month."
08-27-2006, 04:47 AM
"Sounds good," Mumbled Pyro, pausing in the middle of 'Get cha head in the game'
"Carry out your magic!"
"It's not magic, it's science!" thus Smon did snap his fingers and the Tams, Toms, and Tims poofed away, replaced by a jet engine. "That's the artifact, no-one touch it for twenty-eight days, six hours, forty-two minutes and twelve seconds or you'll be bound to the tangent universe with them."
08-28-2006, 01:59 AM
"Yay!" Pyro cried, and the munted camera that had been filming everything zoomed backwards. The LF gang did one huge high five, before...
"Argh!" Pyro yelled, waking up with a start.
"Whoa, that was perhaps the weirdest dream I've ever had..." She mumbled, before glancing at the clock.
"And it's still 1:00 AM! Better get back to sleep..." She mumbled, snuggling back into her bed. But outside, a short bald man wearing light brown began to laugh evilly, before leaping of the tree and floating down gently.
But that was something she would deal with another day.
08-28-2006, 02:21 AM
More pointless violence! Lots of guns, light-sabers, Anti-Tims getting sucked into tangent universes ... Mayhem laughed, her arms akimbo, "No one will ever terrorize Tim Shafer again!"
"OH NOES!" Oleander and Tammy cried, their features fading, their bodies being sucked into a warp-hole behind them. Mayhem continued laughing, hi5ing the others. Her laughter echoed and gradually faded away as black overcame her. Mayhem's eyes fluttered open, and she stretched her arms out, "Wha?? Wait, I'm...in my room?" Mayhem got up from her seat and looked around, she had apperantly fallen asleep in front of the computer. "What a weird dream, I coulda sworn it was real. I might as well go vampire hunting for college credits seeing it's so late, 1 AM actually" She said at last, grabbing her bow and quivers. Hoisting herself over her bedroom window, she let out a content sigh and dropped down to the wet earth below.
At DF studios...
"They did it, I can't beleive, it, THEY KILLED THE ANTI-TIM!" Manny shuddered, collapsing against his chair and staring blankly at his PC. "Never underestimate the fans," Tim replied, "The Anti-Tim moniter has stopped altogether and I haven't seen the Weinermobile in hours when we usually sight him every 10 minutes. They wont recall what happened, but I wish those weird kids the best of luck." Tim smirked and left Manny's side, "We should keep working on our topsecret game, doncha think? Lets just hope we have such loyal fans next round..."
Smon awoke with a start. "Whew, for a second there I thought I was gonna be a manipulated dead... well, I'm sure some other dead guy will be responsible for cleaning up this tangent universe problem." he said and then got up to play the computer, because he usually wakes up at about 1:00 AM anyway.
08-29-2006, 02:33 AM
You know, before I started this, I looked at the final pages of other RPG's, most didn't have an ending. People just lost interest and the thread died, this was one of the few that actually ended, and ended right on a good note (sorta). I just had to comment on that.
08-29-2006, 03:07 AM
Hehe, I agree with Mayhem. Now I should start up another role play.
09-01-2006, 07:22 AM
^Oh for craps sake no Pyro.
note: BTW GUYS I'M BACK!!!!
09-01-2006, 03:30 PM
Yay for returniness. Oh, but Grud is gone foevas. *emonessicity*
09-02-2006, 01:30 AM
09-02-2006, 07:07 PM
I'M WRITING AN EPILOGUE HAHAHAHAH I RUINED YOUR GOOD ENDING
Pyramid Head #2 took off the helmet. "Wow, so the clone Anti-Tim is dead?" He was, in fact, Anti-Tim.
"Yup," #1 said, revealing his face as THAT GUY WHO HAD THE GRIM FANDANGO TATOO. "Now we can get our revenge for true."
"Do we get to keep the knives?"
09-04-2006, 01:59 AM
Psha, it was just ironic that St Jimmy came back just as Grud left, and of course since I never shut my yap I had to comment on that too ^^.
Well, Cheez has gone over to the dark side fosho, *emoness/happines*. Why happines? We need a villain, every forum has one. Neh, I'm being random again, someone stop me. Knives or gunshots will do.
09-04-2006, 06:06 AM
-pulls out Scatter gun from Jak-
-shoots shot into Mayhem's arm-
I didn't do it... -shifty eyes-
09-04-2006, 11:08 AM
Yeah, you didn't do it. Didn't do it LIKE A FOX!!!! *calls for medic which in-turn revives Mayhem* *Puts straight-jacket to use*
09-04-2006, 02:04 PM
Straight jackets are so ... strappy. A bold fashion statement indeed.
09-04-2006, 10:48 PM
09-08-2006, 05:49 PM
FERRIS BUELLER: It's over...go home.
09-09-2006, 07:46 AM
Ooh! I likes teh quote game!
09-09-2006, 03:20 PM
sdlkdslfjg; IT'S NOT THE QUOTE GAME.
09-09-2006, 10:38 PM
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