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View Full Version : The Worst Lie EVER!


turtlefreak
01-07-2007, 12:23 PM
What's the worst lie you've ever told and were the effects. And when I say worst I mean, like, causes a complete disaster and makes a mess for everyone. Huh? Tell the truth. O_o

Grey Master
01-07-2007, 02:34 PM
Lying is bad!!! :tsk: :tsk:

.............I was eating with a friend, and he spilled his coffee a little on his pants, in the middle area, and he ask me why I looked at him like that, and I told him that it was nothing, but the pants were clear blue, and he looked like he had pissed himself, and when we got out, everybody was staring at him..........:D

DarthAve
01-07-2007, 03:44 PM
See the 'I'm a lierbird' thread for mine. I can't believe you dumbasses thought I was 15.

turtlefreak
01-07-2007, 03:53 PM
See the 'I'm a lierbird' thread for mine. I can't believe you dumbasses thought I was 15.
Whoa. Except that's not TOO big. If you said you were 15 and then turned out to be like, 30, then that's really somethin'. You're in band? What do you play?

DarthAve
01-07-2007, 04:10 PM
Whoa. Except that's not TOO big. If you said you were 15 and then turned out to be like, 30, then that's really somethin'. You're in band? What do you play?I used to be in band. I played trombone, but it got boring and I had just made the special choir and band might conflict.

turtlefreak
01-07-2007, 04:23 PM
Yeah, I played for a while and then I dislocated my neck or something while playing so I switched to flute. Me likes that WAY better. But yeah, Band can get boring.

Miss_Mayhem
01-07-2007, 04:31 PM
Then just quit it! You did say that the band teach was possesive, but there's a thing called SELF INDULGENCE. As for me ... the time I told an e-friend I'd been grounded and that was why I couldn't reply to her emails. I was really just too lazy to respond. :o

turtlefreak
01-07-2007, 04:33 PM
You butt crack.

Miss_Mayhem
01-07-2007, 04:35 PM
She beleived me.

turtlefreak
01-07-2007, 04:40 PM
Like I said. The worst lie that I ever told was to a friend when she asked me to ask a boy if he would go out with her. I was to lazy to ask so when she came for his response, I told her that he said yes (LIE!). Then she went up to him and tried to like, kiss 'em and he fell over backwards and hit his head on the pole.
OOOHH! Sub-topic: What's the worst injury you've sustained and how did you get it?

Miss_Mayhem
01-07-2007, 04:56 PM
Worst injury was ... damn I've been sheltered.

turtlefreak
01-07-2007, 07:33 PM
I once fell into a pile of rusty sheet metal. Anyone able to top that? :nut:

King Dando
01-07-2007, 08:55 PM
I once accidently turned over onto my hand going down one of those HUGE plastic slides, and tore alot of skin off it.....

itchythesamurai
01-07-2007, 10:32 PM
I think I might've turned a girl anorexic when I lied about how she looked this one time. She was actually pretty attractive. Oh well.

DarthAve
01-07-2007, 10:37 PM
I dropped a 20 pound weight on my pinky toe, lost my toe nail, and had to spend Christmas in bed because I couldn't get up.

elTee
01-08-2007, 12:20 AM
Haha, this one time I had taken some PCP and I jumped off a bridge into the electric lines over a railway. I was off my face. Really stang in the morning.

Of course in the real world, the worst injury I sustained was at University (the first time) when I drunkenly got my little finger caught in a really fυcking heavy door and it turned the nail completely black. When I sobered up it hurt like fυck and it fell off about two weeks later.

I know this isn't a particularly bad injury in the scheme of things, but I pass my good luck off on a combination of good karma and the fact that I eat a whole lot of cereal - and by association, shіtloads of milk which in turn provide me with huge amounts of calcium, and long story short: my bones are made of steel.

Det. Bart Lasiter
01-08-2007, 12:34 AM
Haha, this one time I had taken some PCP and I jumped off a bridge into the electric lines over a railway. I was off my face. Really stang in the morning.

Of course in the real world, the worst injury I sustained was at University (the first time) when I drunkenly got my little finger caught in a really fυcking heavy door and it turned the nail completely black. When I sobered up it hurt like fυck and it fell off about two weeks later.

I know this isn't a particularly bad injury in the scheme of things, but I pass my good luck off on a combination of good karma and the fact that I eat a whole lot of cereal - and by association, shіtloads of milk which in turn provide me with huge amounts of calcium, and long story short: my bones are made of steel.
elTee wins.

Carlo El Sanchez
01-08-2007, 03:58 AM
Back in 2004 i told my friend i saw Halo 2 in this video shop for sale, 7 months before Halo 2 acctually came out and he spent about 2 hours looking for it in the shop everywhere and eventually asked the guy at the counter and he said its not out mate...and yeahh he was angry.

itchythesamurai
01-08-2007, 07:53 AM
I think I was in pre-school when I slammed my thumb in a car door. I was at the ripe young age where I had not yet comprehended the value of making sure my digits did not conflict with shutting things. My thumbnail went through a procession of ugly colors over about a week and eventually fell off. I remember it vividly. I feel for you, elTee.

Grey Master
01-08-2007, 10:12 AM
Got hit by a car when I was 7 years old, got my leg broken and my right arm, was unconscious for two days.

Poopdogjr
01-08-2007, 02:56 PM
Damn. That is a pretty crazy injury. I think chances are that might be the winner here. It certainly tops my top two.

One of which is having a dog bit half of your lip off and having to get 20 stitches on the outside and 20 stitches on the inside to fix it up. It really wasn't that that, but it sounds worse then it really was. The worst part was the needles with the novicane stuff in it. Getting that stuck in your face kills like crazy.

What happened to the driver of the car? Did he stop? Did you guys press charges or anything on him?

elTee
01-08-2007, 08:18 PM
Yeah I had injections through the roof of my mouth (well, the hard bit of gum behind your teeth) in the dentist once. It felt exactly how you would imagine a sharp shard of metal piercing your mouth to feel, but then after fifteen minutes I was anesthetised and I couldn't speak properly anymore. I couldn't drink anything without spilling it either. Man, I wish they'd put me on nitrous, but they were only removing a tooth.

turtlefreak
01-08-2007, 09:11 PM
Icky man. You guys are more dangerous than I thought. The worst I had was when I was 8 and I tried to dive off a ten foot board into 9' of water. That hurt like hell. I belly flopped on the water and I sprained a whole bunch of stuff, then fell unconcious and almost drowned. I was unable to move for about a week. (It was over summer so I didn't have to go to school.)

Miss_Mayhem
01-08-2007, 11:30 PM
They're more dangerous than anyone expects. They live life on the edge - and I mean the very edge, where they're just hanging by a thread, that thread being their only lifeline. And it's a fragile thread, so they'll probably fall into the depths of despair ...


I need coffee!

Poopdogjr
01-08-2007, 11:39 PM
AWESOMENESS!

Miss_Mayhem
01-09-2007, 12:53 AM
I might consider turning that into a sig!

Grey Master
01-09-2007, 09:14 AM
@Poopdogjr: Uhhh.....thanks, the driver ran away like a coward, but I recovered just fine.
The stuff they put in the needles really hurt, believe me.
And that dog bite seems pretty bad.

DarthAve
01-09-2007, 03:50 PM
2 of my cousins, from different sides of the family, both got chunks of their butt bitten off by a dog.

Grey Master
01-09-2007, 04:01 PM
Ouch!! that had to hurt!

itchythesamurai
01-09-2007, 04:57 PM
chinks of their butt

I knew Eric would be a bad influence on you, causing you to spurt out racial slurs like that.

zelda 41
01-09-2007, 08:16 PM
I once when I was young tripped on a piece of plywood and both my legs were full of splinters. My mom had to get a needle and dig them out of my skin. IT HURT LIKE HELL.

Grey Master
01-09-2007, 08:17 PM
Still got some marks or scars?

zelda 41
01-09-2007, 08:26 PM
Surprisingly no. We used like two bottles of scar remover to get rid of anything left. Damn, it makes me shudder thing of that day.

Grey Master
01-09-2007, 08:28 PM
I have a lot of scars, I like them,its kinda freaky......

zelda 41
01-09-2007, 08:29 PM
Dude, my dog friggin scarred my right leg so bad by biting it.

DarthAve
01-09-2007, 08:35 PM
I have a lot of scars, I like them,its kinda freaky......
~pulles up pant leg to reveal scar~

I love my rugburn scar. I feel down the steps in heels.

Grey Master
01-09-2007, 08:38 PM
have a scar in my right knee when I fell down and cut myself and got stiches, also in my hand, cutted myself trying to make dinner with a knife....

zelda 41
01-09-2007, 08:41 PM
OH god. I remember when I was cutting some cherries for somthing when I was 7. I was using a butter knife, but it cut through my skin to my bone. OMG IT HURT

Grey Master
01-09-2007, 08:46 PM
Guys I have created a thread just for the scars topic, so we can get back on subject here.

@zelda 41: I know, I put alcohol in them inmediatly, then the fun begins......

KingCheez
01-09-2007, 11:19 PM
OH god. I remember when I was cutting some cherries for somthing when I was 7. I was using a butter knife, but it cut through my skin to my bone. OMG IT HURT

Hey Kenny, I never knew you came here. Listen I know it fullfils your erotic fantasies but please don't pretend to be a girl here.

DarthAve
01-10-2007, 03:07 PM
OH god. I remember when I was cutting some cherries for somthing when I was 7. I was using a butter knife, but it cut through my skin to my bone. OMG IT HURT
I was once trying to open a thing of pretzals with a steak knife, knife slips, goes into hand...Oh no.

I could see the inside of my hand. It was all pink.

zelda 41
01-10-2007, 06:57 PM
Hey Kenny, I never knew you came here. Listen I know it fullfils your erotic fantasies but please don't pretend to be a girl here.


.........wtf? Wat the hell are you talking about Cheez?

@ Darth: ewww, so was mine

Psychochaos3
01-10-2007, 07:35 PM
I was once trying to open a thing of pretzals with a steak knife, knife slips, goes into hand...Oh no.

I could see the inside of my hand. It was all pink.
See kids. That's why pretzels are dangerous.

This joke is in honor of the late Mitch Hedburg. "I do not feel like a tree."

zelda 41
01-10-2007, 07:39 PM
Okay, worst lie ever:http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=222

turtlefreak
01-10-2007, 10:17 PM
See kids. That's why pretzels are dangerous.




Oooooooh. Have you ever tried to turn yourself into a human pretzel? I tried once and brought my leg over my head and got stuck like that for a while. They had to pull me appart and I couldn't sit for about a week....that was dumb :wstupid:

Miss_Mayhem
01-10-2007, 10:47 PM
Pretzels .... mmm .... apple-cinnamon flavor .... *drools*

Det. Bart Lasiter
01-10-2007, 11:26 PM
Can any of you swallow a pretzel stick whole?

KingCheez
01-10-2007, 11:39 PM
My lies have only ever hurt myself.

alliespixie
01-10-2007, 11:58 PM
Can any of you swallow a pretzel stick whole?
nope..i wonder who can? can you even swallow a pretzel?

Det. Bart Lasiter
01-11-2007, 12:02 AM
I bet Madonna can.

Samnmax221
01-11-2007, 12:04 AM
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/hr/thumb/e/e9/George_Bush.jpg/200px-George_Bush.jpg

Poopdogjr
01-11-2007, 02:54 PM
I never knew pretzels were so evil.

DarthAve
01-11-2007, 04:26 PM
When you give a pretzal to a president, he CHOKES!

When you give a gun to a Vice President, he SHOOTS!

When you give an internets to a senator, he IM'S CHILDREN ABOUT PRON!

Poopdogjr
01-11-2007, 04:38 PM
Ah America, brings a tear to my eye. For more then one reason.

turtlefreak
01-11-2007, 07:29 PM
Can any of you swallow a pretzel stick whole?
Do you mean the little crunchy kind? I tried once and I choked.

zelda 41
01-11-2007, 08:19 PM
I tried that once. Didn't work out too well.

Miss_Mayhem
01-11-2007, 08:35 PM
Talkin' bout politickin' ... anyone here watch The Daily Show or The Colbert Report?

turtlefreak
01-11-2007, 08:39 PM
Once. The Christmas special on the Colbert Report

DarthAve
01-11-2007, 08:40 PM
The Daily Show
THE THEME IS PERFORMED BY THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS!!!

I just wanted you to know this.

King Dando
01-12-2007, 09:32 AM
THE THEME IS PERFORMED BY THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS!!!

I just wanted you to know this.

The guys who do the Malcolm in the Middle theme? I love that song

DarthAve
01-12-2007, 03:29 PM
The guys who do the Malcolm in the Middle theme? I love that song
They won a grammy for that song, yes. (http://www.tmbg.com/photos/hires/Grammy%20Pose.jpg)

itchythesamurai
01-12-2007, 04:12 PM
They'll always be that band that did a song about President Polk to me. Also, I can put both of my legs behind my head. Just putting that out there.

DarthAve
01-12-2007, 05:03 PM
And to my, they're the ultimate shippers of Phil/Rya. They did write a song that is the ULTIMATE Phil/Rya song (End of the Tour)

turtlefreak
01-13-2007, 05:48 PM
I liked Malcom in the Middle. It reminded me of my family... (But the bastards on Fox had to cancel it! Screw yous!)

Samnmax221
01-13-2007, 06:00 PM
Mayhem your friend is nuts.

Miss_Mayhem
01-13-2007, 06:04 PM
Yeah, she is -_-, like everyone else on RD, we'll just get used to her.

turtlefreak
01-13-2007, 06:07 PM
I just have issues... :angel:

Miss_Mayhem
01-13-2007, 06:12 PM
You're nothing compared to Jmac, SamnMax, Milo and perhaps Cheez.

itchythesamurai
01-13-2007, 06:15 PM
Is she comparable to me at least?

turtlefreak
01-13-2007, 06:18 PM
We should do a game show! "How crazy is she?!?"

itchythesamurai
01-13-2007, 07:37 PM
Not crazy enough to be committed yet. Which is not crazy enough.

turtlefreak
01-13-2007, 07:40 PM
Enough for what, might I inquire?

itchythesamurai
01-13-2007, 07:42 PM
For a discount on a straitjacket.

turtlefreak
01-13-2007, 07:44 PM
No but someone offered to stick me in a padded cell once. :nut:

Miss_Mayhem
01-13-2007, 08:49 PM
Oh, how could I forget to mention you, Itchy? But that straightjacket is very flattering I must say.

DarthAve
01-13-2007, 10:42 PM
I wanted a straightjacket, but I didn't get one. DD:

Halo_92
01-13-2007, 11:14 PM
I already have one but you can ave it ave.

*Gives Ave Straight Jacket*

DarthAve
01-13-2007, 11:20 PM
No, I really wanted one.

In real life. To wear to school.

Teacher- Avery, why arn't you doing your work.
Ave-I'm in a straightjacket, sir.
Teacher-Well...Let's try and get it off.
~10 minutes later~
Teacher- Well, I guess you'll have to write with your mouth.

Halo_92
01-13-2007, 11:43 PM
Okay thats cool too.

turtlefreak
01-14-2007, 11:17 AM
plus you can, throw your self at stuff and it woun't hurt. (That much)

Poopdogjr
01-14-2007, 03:00 PM
I would love to have a straight jacket. But you know if you did have one, some jerk who always randomly come up and lock you up in it, leaving you stuck in it. But that would be a neat fashion statement. You would need a hannibal-lecter facemask to complete the onsemble (spelling?).

DarthAve
01-14-2007, 03:25 PM
I would love to have a straight jacket. But you know if you did have one, some jerk who always randomly come up and lock you up in it, leaving you stuck in it. But that would be a neat fashion statement. You would need a hannibal-lecter facemask to complete the onsemble (spelling?).
ensemble, with an e, not an o.

NO PROBLEM SMON

itchythesamurai
01-14-2007, 04:39 PM
Ave, you fool! If we start correcting everybody's mistakes, why would Smon ever come back? *whimpers*

DarthAve
01-14-2007, 07:28 PM
Smon has to come back! If he doesn't I'll be next to leave.

D:

itchythesamurai
01-14-2007, 07:35 PM
Darth, your new sig is sexual and violent all at once. I'm brimming with pride for you.

DarthAve
01-14-2007, 07:37 PM
I am too.

Gordie looks so sexy and dangerous. I'm getting excited.

itchythesamurai
01-14-2007, 10:33 PM
TMI. I was searching on eBay for straitjackets, and they make really cool punk looking black leather ones. I would totally buy one if they weren't around $400.

DarthAve
01-14-2007, 10:35 PM
Those sound SO cool. I wish I hadn't spent all my christmas money on oreos and perfume.

Grey Master
01-15-2007, 12:15 AM
I leave this place for a few says and see what happens..

Did somebody mentioned a straitjacket?

itchythesamurai
01-15-2007, 12:17 AM
I started it. And I just want to clarify that straitjacket is the original spelling, but straightjacket is an acceptable alternative these days.

Samnmax221
01-15-2007, 12:19 AM
TMI. I was searching on eBay for straitjackets, and they make really cool punk looking black leather ones. I would totally buy one if they weren't around $400.
Do you have any idea what those are meant for, the only reason I would buy one is to practice getting out of one.

itchythesamurai
01-15-2007, 12:35 AM
Oh, the one I was looking at looked like it could be worn stylistically. As in you can wear it like a regular jacket if you don't do up all the straps and restraints.

Grey Master
01-15-2007, 12:37 AM
I seriously want one!!!

zelda 41
01-15-2007, 06:28 AM
Hot Topic at our mall sells them for $200. Dude, thats soooooo not fair

Grey Master
01-15-2007, 10:22 AM
Where is this mall u speak of?

Smon
01-15-2007, 10:32 AM
Smon has to come back! If he doesn't I'll be next to leave.

D:
I've been here the whole time, just more of a watchman than a guide.

...also I've been playing sid Meier's Pirates.

...

DarthAve
01-15-2007, 11:02 AM
also I've been playing sid Meier's Pirates.
That game is SO pimp. I swear, I am so good at it. I came so close to finding all the top 10 pirates, but my wife wanted me to come home. I found 7 of them.

turtlefreak
01-15-2007, 01:15 PM
I think people would look good in straitjackets. And they're pre-bundled for the loony bin!

KingCheez
01-15-2007, 11:32 PM
Hot Topic at our mall sells them for $200. Dude, thats soooooo not fair

kenny remember when the hot topic guy hit on you

i do

Samnmax221
01-15-2007, 11:37 PM
I got dragged into a Hot Topic once, they'll have to kill me to ever get me in one ever again.

turtlefreak
01-16-2007, 08:39 PM
Yeah, those people can be just a little creepy

Grey Master
01-16-2007, 08:44 PM
I got dragged into a Hot Topic once, they'll have to kill me to ever get me in one ever again.

Whats that? (sorry for the n00bish question!)

turtlefreak
01-16-2007, 08:55 PM
A Creepy emo store where the stuff is okay but the people and the music are really weird

Grey Master
01-16-2007, 09:03 PM
I kinda like Emos, I have many Emo friends, but Im not one, so I will search for one near me and go check it out...

Miss_Mayhem
01-16-2007, 10:15 PM
If anything, the anime-themed shirts there aren't too bad. They are actually wearable beneath a stylin' jacket.

DarthAve
01-16-2007, 10:38 PM
My aunt got me a Queen shirt there.

And they have cool Nightmare Before christmas stuff.

itchythesamurai
01-17-2007, 12:20 AM
I was upset when I went in there and they had Star Wars and Marvel Comics stuff. Those were sacred to me, and now they have a taint upon them which I cannot ignore.

Poopdogjr
01-17-2007, 12:26 AM
Yes, Hot Topic has ruined many a once loved and innocent thing. My main hate on them is Invader Zim. They now make it uncool to like it. But I secretly still do. They also destroy many other nerdly things they have no right to tarnish. And for that they have my hate.

itchythesamurai
01-17-2007, 12:29 AM
Yeah, they also ruined Johnny the Homicidal Maniac. They better not touch my other hyperviolent comics...

milo
01-17-2007, 12:41 AM
I was upset when I went in there and they had Star Wars and Marvel Comics stuff. Those were sacred to me, and now they have a taint upon them which I cannot ignore.
Then why did you go in there man?? Whatcha don't know can't hurt you.