View Full Version : The Ruin a Wish Foundation

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05-17-2008, 12:30 PM

Here's a little game I got from another forum. It's called the 'Ruin a Wish foundation.'
Basically, someone posts a wish, and the next persons grants it, but just...not with the whole good result. :xp:

An example:
"I wish I had a car!"
"Granted, but unfortunately, I had to sell the wheels."

Another one:
"I wish I had a million dollars!"
"Granted, they are spread across America in the form of cents!"

I'll start:
"I wish I had an X-Wing!"

05-17-2008, 04:00 PM
Granted, but Lucas sues you for everything you have and wins.

I wish I really was a baron.

Rabish Bini
05-18-2008, 03:34 AM
Granted, but I had to remove the on, leaving you with a bar

I wish I had a knuckle sandwich

05-18-2008, 03:42 AM
Granted, but it's being delivered to your face. Really fast.

I wish fire was cold.

Rabish Bini
05-18-2008, 04:24 AM
granted but I preheated it

I wish I was a turkey

Boba Rhett
05-18-2008, 04:32 AM
Granted but I'm planning on filling every one of your orifices with delicious cornbread stuffing. I also have very large hands. Brace yourself.

I wish I had a big pitcher of delicious iced tea.

05-18-2008, 04:39 AM
Granted, and as a bonus I put cyanide in it.

I wish I could come up with an awesome wish.

05-18-2008, 07:17 AM
Granted, but the awesome wish was considered a virus by your mailbox.

I wish I could fly!

05-18-2008, 10:43 AM
Granted, but you may not have the safest landing you'd like.

I wish I could erase bad memories.

Ctrl Alt Del
05-18-2008, 02:19 PM
Granted, but your good ones goes with them.

I wish I had some ice-cream.

Marius Fett
05-18-2008, 04:40 PM
I got you some ice cream!

But I eated it...

I wish I could walk through walls...

05-18-2008, 05:48 PM
Granted, but you have to go at a speed dependent on what the wall is made of and how thick it is...

I wish all your base were belong to me.

Ctrl Alt Del
05-18-2008, 08:37 PM
Granted, but all the others games clichés will come along. Ouch.

I wish the cake wasn't a lie.

05-18-2008, 10:18 PM
Granted, but it's an octopus and thorn cake. With barbed wire frosting.

I wish I was C'Thulhu.

05-18-2008, 11:22 PM
Granted, but he is then kidnapped and murdered by his arch nemisis.

I wish I hadn't picked to read "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" for Language Arts.

05-19-2008, 12:31 AM
Granted, but that's because you're in Africa and can't afford to go to school.

I wish that it would snow here just enough to give everything a thin and harmless blanket of white so everyone would be happy. o_Q

Serpentine Cougar
05-19-2008, 01:03 AM
Granted, but the cold weather freezes your pipes and they burst.

I wish there was a spoon.

05-19-2008, 03:17 AM
Granted, but there's nothing to eat.

I wish Keanu Reeves wasn't in the Matrix and Samuel L. Jackson was Morpheus.

Rabish Bini
05-19-2008, 04:33 AM
Granted, but Nicholas Cage is now Trinity. Ooohhhh

I wish that ice blocks could be used as heaters

Marius Fett
05-19-2008, 11:48 AM
Granted, but they are BROKEN heaters...

I wish I had a bigger....

House. :xp:

Ctrl Alt Del
05-19-2008, 01:52 PM
Granted, it's located on Mars. Have a good trip.

I wish September arrived earlier this year.

05-19-2008, 01:56 PM
Granted, but you realise that it was April the first.

I wish I had limitless internet connectivity in my brain.

05-19-2008, 03:37 PM
Granted, internet wires have been surgically inserted, including all spam and trojan horses.

I wish was Batman!

Marius Fett
05-19-2008, 05:11 PM
Granted, but you have to wear pink instead of black.

I wish I had wings.

05-19-2008, 07:07 PM
Granted, but they're water wings.

I wish I had a brain, or a heart, or courage.

05-19-2008, 07:15 PM
Granted. One brain with no intelligence, a heart as black as sin (and w/a pacemaker no less), and courage w/o convictions.

I wish we lived in a perfect world.

05-19-2008, 11:42 PM
Granted, but this game wouldn't work anymore.

I wish I could turn back time.

05-20-2008, 12:55 AM
Granted, but you have to stay there.

I wish the end of the school year stress was over.

05-20-2008, 01:12 AM
Granted, however you have been assigned summer school. Njoy! :xp:

I wish to know what I want my career to be.

Marius Fett
05-20-2008, 02:10 PM
Granted, it's sanitation engineer. (AKA bin man)

I wish I had pizza.

Ferc Kast
05-20-2008, 05:41 PM
Granted, but it's a Mexican pizza.

I wish that I had a girlfriend.

05-20-2008, 06:23 PM
Granted, but she's a hutt.

I wish gasoline was only 5 cents/gal (including tax) and in abundant supply.

05-20-2008, 06:30 PM
Granted, but then OPEC puts an embargo on us and we're screwed.

I wish for Chocolate Chip Muffins.

05-20-2008, 07:46 PM
Granted, but there's hash in the batter so you get arrested.

I wish my long weekend didn't end yesterday. :(

05-21-2008, 12:20 AM
Granted, it ended day before yesterday now.

I wish I had a supercomputer that could emulate every possible video game platform.

05-21-2008, 01:23 AM
Granted, but it would always crash.

I wish Microsoft would stop releasing $#&%@* software before it's actually ready.

05-21-2008, 02:00 AM
Granted. Microsoft collapsed and Mac still isn't supporting most games, so nao you ruined it.

I wish I had a delicious pie right nao.

05-21-2008, 04:00 AM
Granted - it's on your face right now.

I wish I was in a steampunk universe.

05-21-2008, 05:10 AM
You are, but it is merely 5 minutes from collapsing into a giant black hole.

I wish celebrities would stop making their cheezy porn videos.

Rabish Bini
05-21-2008, 06:26 AM
Granted, but they make cheezy cooking videos instead.

I wish i dint fail my first maths exam

Hayden Kered
05-21-2008, 06:34 AM
Granted, but you will fail all other exams.

I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a '64 Impala!

05-21-2008, 02:40 PM
Granted, but the rabbit will now jump out of the hat and destroy your '64 Impala with his bat.

I wish people could breath underwater (w/o O2 tanks, etc..).

Ferc Kast
05-21-2008, 04:46 PM
Granted, but the world will be flooded.

I wish that I could make quality mods.

Marius Fett
05-21-2008, 05:21 PM
Granted, but they are bad quality...

I wish I could understand 3ds Max.

05-21-2008, 06:10 PM
Granted, but how are you going to model things now that you have no hands?

I wish I could log keys with just a log and a keyboard.

05-21-2008, 08:25 PM
Now you can, but everytime you use the log, it shatters the keyboard.

I wish reality tv would vanish to the pit from whence it came (never to return).

05-21-2008, 08:31 PM
Granted, but it's still being transmitted by radio.

I wish it would hurry up and be summer here.

05-21-2008, 11:12 PM
Granted, but a phenomenal heat wave creates a OMGWTFBBQ of you all.

I wish I had an iPod that stored bands physically.

05-22-2008, 12:03 AM
Granted, but then you drop it on your foot and die from the sheer pain of countless tons of human flesh and instruments concentrated into a small handheld device.

I wish that people would stop using cell phones while driving their cars.

05-22-2008, 07:01 PM
Granted, but now they put annoying sub woofers in their back seats and talk on bluetooth.

I wish that Pokemon existed.

05-22-2008, 08:17 PM
Granted, but you were crushed by a Chancey at the hospital shortly after birth.

I wish there was a legal and safe way to punch babies.

05-22-2008, 11:21 PM
Granted, but it is legalized only after babies are outfitted with people-destroying lasers.

I wish I had some sort of VR interface to my computer.

Rabish Bini
05-23-2008, 12:44 AM
Granted, but you die from radiowaves.

I wish I didn't have any homework,

05-23-2008, 02:18 AM
Granted, but now all you can do is clean sewers for a living.

I wish Sabertooth would get himself a girlfriend so he could stop all that masturbating. :xp:

Rabish Bini
05-23-2008, 03:15 AM
Granted, but he's too shy to get any so he keeps masturbating anyway. :xp:

I wish that this wish didn't backfire.

Ctrl Alt Del
05-23-2008, 11:02 AM
Granted, you wish won't, but I will.

I wish we could go back at Sabrez sexuality.

05-23-2008, 01:55 PM
Granted, but Sabre now has a girlfriend - in fact, he has three.

I wish there were no Sexually Transmitted Diseases.

05-23-2008, 02:36 PM
Granted, they now only appear in relationships in which the man has three girlfriends or more :xp:

(Double backfire!)
I wish I had a real functional lightsaber (and even a pink one would be cool enough!)

Marius Fett
05-23-2008, 04:43 PM
Granted, but you dropped it off a cliff 5 mins after getting it.

Now it's broke. :xp:

I wish I had some chicken.

05-23-2008, 05:18 PM
Here ya go, but due to genetic engineering....it doesn't taste like chicken anymore.

I wish dead people would bathe more often.

Marius Fett
05-23-2008, 05:57 PM
Granted, but they use YOUR bathtub...

While YOU'RE in it...

I wish my mother loved me... :(

05-23-2008, 06:23 PM
Granted, but now she loves you in a way that is forbidden and unnatural. :xp:

I wish I had the Midas touch, but only for inanimate objects.

05-24-2008, 03:50 AM
Granted; however, it is for both animate and inamate objects. ;)

I wish that I had all of the html codes 'embeded' into my head.

05-24-2008, 08:00 AM
Done, but embedded was taken literally as well. Your whole skin of your head is now full of codes, like one giant nerd-tatoo! :xp:

I wish for the Force Unleashed to hit the PC as well!

05-24-2008, 10:07 AM
Granted. The game disc comes alive and breaks the PC with a baseball bat.

I wish to see what happens to me in a parallel universe version of Lucasforums.

Ctrl Alt Del
05-24-2008, 10:37 AM
Granted, but the latest upgrade on vbulletin erased that universe.

I wish I could use bigger signature images.

Marius Fett
05-24-2008, 10:56 AM
Granted, but RedHawke killed you...

I wish I had a drink...

Ferc Kast
05-24-2008, 11:02 AM
Granted, but it's from the Kath Hounds' Watering Urn.

I wish I had a custom title...

Marius Fett
05-24-2008, 11:51 AM
Granted, but it says Veteran.

I wish my laptop had more memory.

05-24-2008, 12:10 PM
Granted. It has more memory, but at the expense of your own life experiences.

I wish Raptor Jesus existed.

05-24-2008, 01:14 PM
Granted, but he bites off your head.

I wish I didn't have just one week to catch up on late assignments.

Ferc Kast
05-24-2008, 01:31 PM
Granted, but you have just one day to catch up on late assignments.

I wish there was a KotOR III being made...

05-24-2008, 03:36 PM
Granted, but it will be released in 2050 on a platform obviously not yet in existence.

I wish KOTOR 3 were already out on PC (so that issue could finally be behind us).

05-24-2008, 04:07 PM
Granted, but it's a direct port of the Commodore 64 version.

I wish that is what she said.

05-24-2008, 04:27 PM
Granted but she's lying

I wish I wern't going to Freshman Farewell stag.

05-24-2008, 08:46 PM
Granted, you failed every class you had this year and therefore will still be a freshman next year.

I wish water was flammable.

Det. Bart Lasiter
05-24-2008, 08:48 PM
It is. I saw it on the Colbert Report.

05-25-2008, 01:51 AM
Yeah, but that was on the April Fool's Day show.

I wish I could think of a wish right now.

05-25-2008, 01:05 PM
Granted, but I already replied so you'll have to wait until you can post it.

I wish the Soup-Nazi from Seinfeld would be retconned into the Death Star Cantina!

05-25-2008, 02:43 PM
He was, but he refused DV soup and was last seen floating through space.

I wish that things like those ultimate fighting matches were death matches.

05-25-2008, 03:40 PM
Granted, buy your match against an extremely powerfull martial artist El Ertisto de lã Murete (Artist of Death, I believe?) will be the first to air!

I wish I was of royal blood!

05-25-2008, 03:47 PM
Granted, you now have hemophilia.

I wish I was in Spain right nao.

05-25-2008, 03:51 PM
Granted...you are on a very nice camping in Spain near a forest. *Forest fire FWOOOOOSH*

I wish I could trace my family tree further back...it only goes to 1580 :(

05-25-2008, 03:53 PM
Granted, you discover that your ancestors were dropped down by aliens. You don't get their superpowers and the FBI knows too.

I wish I had your soul. Muahahaha!

05-25-2008, 04:14 PM
Granted, but my soul is rotten by alcohol abuse, beiing Dutch, too much Monty Python, Star Wars and extreme exposure to Lucasforums. You die of extreme exposure to my soul and spontaniously conbust.

I wish I had my soul back! :xp:

05-25-2008, 05:02 PM
After Hal's unforseen demise, you now do. However, it now claims you life as well, as in a suicidal fit you knock me out and face El Ertisto de lã Murete in my place.

I wish this forum had even more options than the recent upgrade allowed for.

05-25-2008, 10:38 PM
Granted. However, half your user_name gets taken away as a result.

I wish I could change shape and form.

05-25-2008, 11:11 PM
Granted, but you can only change into a Snorlax.

I wish I had triscuts.

05-25-2008, 11:13 PM
Granted, they're the new cyanide flavoured ones.

I wish I could shard your purplez IRL.

05-26-2008, 12:30 AM
Decides not to grant wish, just for the helluva it.

I wish Bill Gates liquidated all his stock and gave me the money for my own.

05-26-2008, 12:48 PM
Granted, but due to technical difficulty, the economy begins to drop even further and you begin to owe the government twice the amount you received from Microsoft.

I wish I knew what I was even talking about......

05-26-2008, 03:29 PM
Granted, but you forget it a moment later.

I wish my internet connection speed was fifteen times faster.

05-26-2008, 03:34 PM
Granted, but it only moves 15x faster than partially frozen molasses.

I wish I had a fully stocked complimentary wet bar at my disposal.

05-29-2008, 06:52 AM
Granted, but the idiots who went to place it misunderstood the wish and disposed of the thing immediately.

I wish I had Uber soccer skills :)

05-29-2008, 10:22 AM
Granted. Soccer is all you ever think about now. Say goodbye to oral hygiene, food, family, friends, school, etc.

I wish there was a cure to end all suffering without having to die or some such.

05-29-2008, 02:24 PM
Unfortunately, there isn't.

I wish I owned all the diamonds in the world.

05-29-2008, 08:17 PM
Granted, but people now realise how useless they are.

I wish my wisdom teeth weren't removed today. >_<

05-30-2008, 01:59 AM
Granted, all of your other teeth are pulled.

I remember something exactly liek this on another site, the 'Corrupt-a-Wish' thread...

I wish for KOTOR III to come out now and be the best game ever.

05-30-2008, 07:05 AM
Granted, it's now released for the Atari 2600 and even the Angry videogame Nerd thinks it's good.

I wish I didn't have to work in a few hours....

05-30-2008, 08:19 AM
Granted, but you get fired for not showing up.

I wish I hadn't registered for LucasForums.

Marius Fett
05-30-2008, 09:21 AM
Granted. But tommorrow the Admins will come to your house in a black van and kill you.

I wish I was a Stormtrooper... (One that's alive) :xp:

05-30-2008, 12:49 PM
Granted, but then you're killed immediately afterward.

I wish politicains would cut taxes instead of raising them (as if).

05-31-2008, 08:13 AM
Granted! But the world economy colapses and you end up living in a box...

I wish I had a Subaru Impreza WRXI...

05-31-2008, 09:49 AM
Granted. It's missing its engine.

I wish I had a working ray gun.

Marius Fett
05-31-2008, 10:44 AM
Granted, but you held it wrong and killed yourself.

I wish my laptop wasn't Vista...

05-31-2008, 11:45 AM
Granted, it's MDdos , 1987 version!

I wish I could ride that Honda CRX racing car I just raced again :D

05-31-2008, 06:43 PM
Granted. It breaks down upon inserting the ignition key.

I wish I had more courage.

06-01-2008, 05:54 AM
Granted, but you're so courageous that you join the military and it doesn't end well for you.

I wish I could watch the new season of Venture Bros from Singapore.

06-01-2008, 08:22 AM
Granted, but are immediately arrested for dropping your bubble gum on the pavement in Singapore (an are sentenced to prison), which truely counts as a crime there.

I wish I was an Epic moderator/admin here! The power....the POWER! :xp:

06-02-2008, 02:21 PM
Granted, but it comes with the responsibility of dealing with the stupid noobs.

I wish I had a yoink stick.

06-02-2008, 06:03 PM
Granted. However, you'll have to duel Rhett or itchy to keep it.

I wish for an extra wish.

Marius Fett
06-02-2008, 06:10 PM
Granted. But you wished never to be able to wish again. :p

I wish I had some chicken...

06-03-2008, 01:57 AM
Granted, but it's genetically altered chicken that tastes horrible.

I wish I could be beta Halo 3 on Legendary. Speaking of which, anyone got any tips on the levels on Legendary?

06-03-2008, 07:45 AM
Granted, you can beat it! After intensive training, that is....

I wish my Battlefield 2142 would stop messing around :(
(Everytime I want to play it, it says it can't find the disc...tried everything, helpdesk etc..but no result)

06-03-2008, 10:19 AM
Granted, you can fix it (that game rocks)

I wish my skin would be viewable in ModView

06-03-2008, 11:30 AM
Granted. You have no model to attach it to, though.

I wish I had an extra pair of jeans.

06-03-2008, 01:56 PM
Granted. But it's brown and full of holes 'n dirt.

I wish I could do my homework faster

06-03-2008, 04:31 PM
Granted, but now you've forgotten that your dog ate the homework and have flunked class the next day.

I wish an opening theme would play every time I take a step.

06-03-2008, 11:00 PM
Granted, but people beat you up cuz it's annoying. *pounds topshot to a pulp.* :)

I wish the stupid people would shut up.

06-04-2008, 03:44 PM
Granted, but now the super-intellectual people won't stop being so damn annoying!

I wish my DS had history-rewriting capabilities.

06-06-2008, 05:30 AM
It does now and plans to write you out of existence.

I wish the election were tomorrow so that the media would shut up about it already.

06-06-2008, 05:32 AM
They do, so no-one knows about the elections and a dictator is chosen!

I wish I could play the guitar as good as Clapton..

06-06-2008, 05:37 AM
You do, but it's Izzy Clapton from down the street (who also happens to be extremely tone deaf).

I wish that Sex And The City would flop.

06-06-2008, 05:38 AM
It does...for the male viewers at least :xp:

I wish I could play for the Dutch team on the Euro Soccer tournament..

06-06-2008, 05:44 AM
You can......but you're only the towel/water boy.

I wish all the people that wrote malicious virus code had their computers explode everytime they attempted to create a new bug or modify an existing one.

06-07-2008, 11:29 PM
Your wish has been granted. Unfortunately, you attempted to create a virus, and your computer exploded, destroying you as well.

I wish that I was immune to the Ruining of Wishes! :p

06-07-2008, 11:42 PM
Granted; however, but the government will force you to. Sorry! :)

I wish for a great summer!

06-08-2008, 01:10 AM
Granted, but when September rolls around you don't feel like working and your GPA gets shot to Hell's basement.

I wish I was a Deep One.

06-09-2008, 03:54 AM
Granted, but deep has now been redefined as shallow.

I wish spring skipped summer and went straight to fall.

06-09-2008, 09:21 AM
Granted. However, it is now winter where you live and fall for the rest of us where we are.

I wish I had a good job.

06-09-2008, 09:37 AM
Granted; but hating tomatoes will get you fired!!

I wish kids in my neighborhood would stop thinking they are better then me at street surfing.

06-09-2008, 10:56 AM
Granted, but now they start thinking they are better then you at everything else.

I wish I had a more creative title.

06-09-2008, 05:56 PM
You create one, but the staff thinks it's too pornographic and ban you for life.

I wish we needed to sleep fewer hours a day.

06-10-2008, 01:50 AM
Granted, but passing out drunk does not count as sleep. :xp:

I wish I had some pie right now.

06-10-2008, 01:53 AM
Granted, I make a mean Apple Pie. :D

I wish I was 16.

Here's your pie


06-10-2008, 02:05 AM
Granted, but you get a crappy car to drive.

I wish I had Team Fortress 2.

06-10-2008, 05:37 PM
You get it, but only to find out the install disks are empty.

I wish red were green.

06-10-2008, 05:42 PM
Granted, you're now colorblind

I wish I was rich...:lol: doesn't anyone...

06-10-2008, 08:43 PM
^Granted, you now owe the bank 1 million dollars.

I wish I was Adam West.

06-10-2008, 08:46 PM
Who's that, granted if it makes you happy :)

I wish I lived in California (San Diego)

06-11-2008, 12:51 AM
^Adam West was Batman (1960s TV version)

You will......after it becomes part of Mexico.

I wish I had the Midas touch, but that the only thing I couldn't turn into gold was human flesh (ie then I can't accidentally kill myself).

06-11-2008, 10:36 AM
Granted! But the stock market collapses under the overflood of gold and it becomes worthless and you are stuck with unfortunate smelting accidents around you.

I wish the computer-fix guy would take up his phone! This d*mned machine is still pumpin blue screens!

06-11-2008, 12:24 PM
Granted, but your machine blows up and you can't use it anyways...

I wish, I didn't have to get glasses...

06-11-2008, 01:13 PM
Granted, you can either take lensen, laser your eyes or walk into every object you (can't) see. Pick one! :xp:

I wish I could use Force Lightning to fry some idiots...

06-11-2008, 02:44 PM
Granted, but you on accident shock you and your girlfriend while in a public pool...

I wish, I could play the drums like Neal Pert...

06-11-2008, 04:24 PM
Granted, but now you become nonexistent, since I have no idea who Neal Pert is.

I wish I could play guitar like Buckethead.

06-11-2008, 04:40 PM
Granted, but now you become nonexistent, since I have no idea who Buckethead is. (Deja Vu :D)

I wish The Force was real

this is Neil Peart (I misspelled his name :D)

Here's his life story too

06-11-2008, 05:01 PM
Granted, the Force forces you off your computer. :xp:

I wish I could think of a wish.

Granted, but now you become nonexistent, since I have no idea who Buckethead is. (Deja Vu :D)

Shoulda seen that coming.
THIS (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buckethead) Is Buckethead, the best guitarist you've never heard of.

this is Neil Peart (I misspelled his name :D)

Here's his life story too

I also shoulda known who Neil Peart is, I'm a big Rush fan.

06-11-2008, 05:08 PM
Granted, you think of wish, but your wish is for you to go bankrupt and you end up on the streets as a beggar :xp:

I wish, Emperor Palpatine died in a saber fight with Vader...

06-11-2008, 06:01 PM
Granted, but he inhabits a clone body afterwards to fry Vader's behind...

I wish the girl I loved would realise it without me having to tell her :)

06-11-2008, 06:19 PM
Granted, she realises it because of everyone else telling her. And lawling.

I wish I didn't have my three hardest exams in the first two days of Exam Week.

06-11-2008, 06:36 PM
Granted. Your teachers excuse you from the exams, but fail you for the courses. Off to summer school with ya, lad. :xp:

I wish I didn't have to come up with a wish here but would still be able to continue playing this game.

06-18-2008, 07:48 AM

Anyways, I wish I could do the barwizarding stuff...

06-18-2008, 01:28 PM
Granted, but you're forced to work in a poor country where people can't afford to tip you.

I wish it were Christmas already.

06-18-2008, 01:36 PM
Granted, its New Years Day. :\

I wish that I had a camera...

06-18-2008, 03:02 PM
Granted, but it's a camera obscura, and it's not the portable kind.

I wish I had the power to melt faces on command.

06-18-2008, 10:17 PM
Now you can.....burn the faces off your plastic soldiers with your new pack of matches.

I wish you well..

06-18-2008, 11:53 PM
Granted, but I get a well. :(

I wish I could fly...

06-19-2008, 12:39 AM
Granted, and you're now in season too!

I wish I had a cannon.

06-19-2008, 12:44 AM
Granted, but you get that camera that I wanted.

I wish for peace...

06-19-2008, 12:53 AM
Granted, but it's the peace of the grave. RIP

I wish I could conquer malaria and become rich doing it.

06-19-2008, 02:28 AM
Granted, you conquered Malaria, but you didn't get rich. Sorry. :(

I wish I had my own computer.... :/

06-19-2008, 06:46 AM
You do, but the OS is in an alien language that nobody understands and can't be replaced.

I wish I had a flawless copy of KOTOR3 (in English) for the PC by Christmas 2008.

06-19-2008, 01:00 PM
Granted, but your computer blows up and you can't use it anyways :lol:

I wish I could do this sometime...


06-19-2008, 02:32 PM
Granted, but it wont be Hillary Clinton:D

I wish I could buy everything in the world

06-19-2008, 03:33 PM
You can, but the cops chase you down thinking you stole it all, now you're rotting in a prison cell...for the rest of your crummy life :lol:

I wish I could run for president, instead of err...

06-19-2008, 03:55 PM
Granted, but the USA becomes a parliamentary republic, so the President wields symbolic power while the Prime Minister (who would be HRC) wields all the real power.

I wish I had a brick in my hands.

06-19-2008, 05:50 PM
Granted, but all you can do with it is smash yourself in the head repeatedly.

I wish I were invincible.

06-19-2008, 06:02 PM
Granted, but your still weak:D

I wish I became an airplane

06-19-2008, 06:12 PM
Granted, but you run into a tornado because someone on onboard used a cellphone and messed up your navigation system :lol:

I wish I was the commando in my avatar...

06-19-2008, 06:29 PM
Granted, but your skills suck as a Commando:D

I wish I had an HK-47 droid

06-19-2008, 08:56 PM
Granted, but I read it as 'I wish I had an HK-47 droid trying to kill me'.

I wish I had inner peace.

06-20-2008, 03:22 AM
Granted, but now you're brain dead.

I wish we could use bigger images for our avatars.

06-20-2008, 05:19 PM
We can. But the mods will downsize them and hate you for life... :(

I wish my computer would STOP messing around! The DVD drive is broken....Me needs Mass Effect. Me needs...

06-20-2008, 05:23 PM
Granted, but you can't play Mass Effect because your disc is two scratched up:xp:

I wish I could get another xbox360:D

06-20-2008, 06:10 PM
Granted, but your screen breaks because of a baseball game inside accident so you can't use it anyways :xp:

I wish I had the best computer on earth...

06-20-2008, 08:13 PM
Granted, but the first thing it does is beat you at chess.

And you can't resist beating it at kickboxing in return.

I wish I had a pet (vegan) bear.

06-20-2008, 08:36 PM
Granted, but he is a man-eater. Sorry and have a nice day. :)

I wish I had a Xbox 360....

06-21-2008, 12:55 AM
Granted, but the Xbox 720 comes out right when you get it. :xp:

I wish I could become a Flash Artist on Newgrounds.com.

06-21-2008, 06:12 AM
Granted! You'll become a very bad one though, with your current skills :xp:

I wish my new DVD-reader/burner thing would allrive already! ME NEEDS MASS EFFECT!

Ferc Kast
06-21-2008, 09:40 AM
Granted, but it arrives broken.

I wish that I had a girlfriend...

06-21-2008, 01:25 PM
Granted. Ferc Kast, meet girlfriend. Girlfriend, meet Fer Kast.


I wish I could go to a party this evening instead of taking the bar shift.

Ferc Kast
06-21-2008, 02:08 PM
Granted; But, the party is June 32nd.

I wish lightsabers were real.

06-21-2008, 02:44 PM
Granted, have a flashlight.

I wish that I was faster.

06-21-2008, 05:07 PM
Granted, you run at Mach 2 into a brick wall.

I wish I could be Halo God.

06-21-2008, 05:33 PM
No. :xp:

I wish that I had more wishes.

Ferc Kast
06-21-2008, 05:41 PM
Granted, but I thought you said dishes. :xp:

I wish for world peace.

06-21-2008, 05:56 PM
Granted, but it's on another world.

I wish I could photosynthesise.

06-21-2008, 11:32 PM
Granted, but you turned green.

I wish that...........................................tha t there is more time in a day.

06-22-2008, 10:32 AM
Granted, but you just waste it anyway.

I wish all the women on the planet were hot (as in extremely good looking, not suffering from terminal hot flashes).

06-22-2008, 04:21 PM
Granted, and all the men in the world are hot too.

Except for you.

I wish I had DnD 3.5 bard class features.

Granted, but you turned green. How is that a downside?

06-22-2008, 04:24 PM
Granted, but 4.0 bard class is released just now. (?)

I wish I had MGS4.

06-22-2008, 04:49 PM
Granted, but you find out that it isn't a porno. :P

I wish 4e DnD would DIAF.

Granted, but 4.0 bard class is released just now. (?)If it's like the rest of 4e I'm not missing much. o_Q

06-22-2008, 05:33 PM
Granted, but I have no clue what you said so the wish probably ended up wrong. :)

I want vacation! NOW!

06-23-2008, 02:03 AM
Granted.....unfortunately it only lasted as long as it took to come up with that wish.

I wish HAL weren't so brain damaged.

06-23-2008, 01:05 PM
Granted...but then food would be.

I wish the olympics were somewhere closer to home.

Marius Fett
06-23-2008, 01:35 PM
Granted. They're in your garden. Which means you've been evicted from your home. You now have to go and live in a small shack made out if baked bean cans and a small piece of rubber tubing, in a small cave outside San Francisco. :)

I wish I had a cookie...

06-23-2008, 01:53 PM
Granted but that means you have to join the dark side, once you eat the cookie you then become hungry for more and you eat until finally the Sith are ashamed of you and kill you.

I wish I could have anything I want (ex computers, all the knowledge in the universe)

06-23-2008, 03:17 PM
Granted, you can. But it's called stealing.

I wish I could join the air force...and become an ace

06-23-2008, 03:25 PM
Granted, but you get shot down the next day and die :xp:

I wish I was amazing at skinning and modding

Marius Fett
06-23-2008, 04:00 PM
Granted. But it's modding Golden Axe for the Sega Megadrive. :)

I wish I two gerbils called Freddie and Flossy...

06-23-2008, 04:14 PM
Granted but Flossy would eat Freddie and then come after you

I wish my girlfriend would come back from vacation

Marius Fett
06-23-2008, 05:48 PM
^Granted. But she came back with another boyfriend called CARLOS.

06-23-2008, 06:15 PM
^That would freaking suck!

I wish I had a hot girlfriend :lol:

Marius Fett
06-23-2008, 06:47 PM
^Granted. She's 500 degrees and burnt off you foreskin. :)

I wish I could fly...

06-23-2008, 07:04 PM
Granted but you would be on drugs then.......

I wish my soccer team did not have to travel as much

06-24-2008, 01:44 AM
Granted. It's just been disbanded due to lack of interest.

I wish many women would "feel" less and think more.

Det. Bart Lasiter
06-24-2008, 02:55 AM
Fine, but now they're not "feeling" you IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN HURR HURR.

06-24-2008, 08:03 AM

I wish I could do a kick-flip on my wave board.

06-24-2008, 09:13 AM
You finally manage to, but kill Jmac in the process. Guess there'll be no women "feeling" him now either. :xp: :lol:

I wish the game makers would focus more on producing good games for the PC and less time worring about the other platforms.

06-24-2008, 09:17 AM
Once it happens the PC is so backwards technologically that the games do not work and they seem to be just like the old bad games

I wish the games I ordered would get here

Det. Bart Lasiter
06-24-2008, 09:29 AM
they do, however they are shot through totenkoph's stomach, landing him in the hospital where he dies a slow, painful death.

Ray Jones
06-24-2008, 10:21 AM
thine wish is hereby granted oh wisest of all wish-men

Det. Bart Lasiter
06-24-2008, 10:35 AM
woah there, das friendo, i'll grant my own damn wishes with good old american ingenuity

06-24-2008, 10:37 AM
Yes it is but you soon get Alzheimer's and all the wish granting power you once had is gone

I wish my Custom Commando was done (the one i am working on)

Det. Bart Lasiter
06-24-2008, 10:40 AM
yes what is i didnt make a wish

Ray Jones
06-24-2008, 10:54 AM

Det. Bart Lasiter
06-24-2008, 12:35 PM
i have no idea what the **** that post i made before was

06-24-2008, 02:31 PM
Guess there'll be no women "feeling" him now either. :xp: :lol:
You'd be surprised at what happens under the moonlight in cemeteries.

06-24-2008, 02:38 PM
Zombie luv ftw...

Anyways, I wish I had Jedi skills! The precognition and stuff..

Marius Fett
06-24-2008, 04:53 PM
Granted. But then you got killed by a Dark Spoon.

I wish I had a bigger room...

Det. Bart Lasiter
06-24-2008, 08:35 PM
you do but the walls burst into flames and you die a slow, painful death as well.

06-24-2008, 08:58 PM
I wish I had the power of breathing underwater :D

06-24-2008, 09:50 PM
Granted, and if you're lucky the ladies where you live are into the whole gills on men thing.

I wish plants would grow themselves.

06-24-2008, 09:53 PM
Granted, that way the tree huggers won't have to do it :lol:

06-27-2008, 05:34 PM
^^ ????????????????? makes no sense

I wish that sniper would stop saying hello you're dead and say something more comforting..........

06-28-2008, 02:43 AM
The thing is, you will never hear him say anything comforting. Bye bye. :wavey:

I wish I had a bannana. :/

06-28-2008, 07:18 AM

I'd wish people would stop forgetting to include a wish in their post after bashing somebody else's into oblivion.

Rabish Bini
06-28-2008, 07:20 AM
Granted, but now people forget to wreck the other persons wish

I wish I was Davor Suker

06-30-2008, 07:52 AM
You are, but I just saw your obit in the morning paper.

I wish it were cooler outside right now (say ~ 65F) with very low humidity.

07-02-2008, 01:51 AM
^Granted, But then the ground opens up and you fall into a MUCH warmer place

I wish Kotor3 would come out

07-02-2008, 03:44 AM
It does, but it is sentient and won't allow you to play it.

I wish people would stop worrying about when Kotor 3 comes out and just relax.

07-02-2008, 03:42 PM
^Granted, but then it comes out nobody cares and all the made copies get dumped on you crushing you.

I wish Bill Gates gave me all his money

07-02-2008, 08:37 PM
^Granted. It's only been one month since you received his donations in exchange for your house and your relatives.

I wish everyone here would give me all of their money.

07-02-2008, 08:56 PM
^Granted, Your donation: 3 cents :xp:

I wish my gmail would stop being SPAMED

07-02-2008, 10:58 PM
Stop signing up to porn sites, it's not that hard.

I wish that next patch
rouges pickpocket
ur epix

07-02-2008, 11:03 PM
Stop signing up to porn sites, it's not that hard.

I wish that next patch
rouges pickpocket
ur epix

Nah its some stupid money site, that gets like a hundred post a week, every post get emailed to me, I would block it but each post is a different email :mad:

07-03-2008, 09:46 AM
No soup for HK-42!

You forgot a wish, and so we have decided that the pr0n spam shalt continue! :D

I wish Bring down the Sky patch/upgrade for Mass Effect was released for PC!

07-04-2008, 01:22 AM
It will be, but unfortunately will only work w/Win95.

I wish gasoline would drop down to $1.50 gal w/o using discounts.

Det. Bart Lasiter
07-04-2008, 02:06 AM
It does but every gas station starts a "free raping with every $10 purchase" campaign.

07-04-2008, 02:12 AM
I wish people would follow the rules of the thread.

07-04-2008, 02:45 AM
Granted, but some people never read the rules. :/

I wish that I could fly.

Det. Bart Lasiter
07-04-2008, 03:20 AM
granted but you fly out of earth's atmosphere and die slowly in the cold abyss of space.

07-05-2008, 08:57 AM
I am Error, please insert wish!

07-06-2008, 01:12 PM
I wish this wish was better than the last persons wish but not as good as twelve posts before my wish if the wish is as bad as this one even though the wish 95 posts before me is not as good as this one.

07-11-2008, 12:06 AM
I wish these wishes were even more wishful.

Ferc Kast
07-13-2008, 05:31 PM
Granted, but they couldn't be fulfilled.

I wish that I could time travel...

Det. Bart Lasiter
07-13-2008, 06:00 PM
granted but you go too far back and burn slowly in the magma of the newly formed earth

Great Scott!
07-13-2008, 06:26 PM
I wish I had a Mattel Hoverboard...

Ferc Kast
07-13-2008, 07:32 PM
Granted, but it's broken.

I wish that Revan was real...