View Full Version : Photoshop fake album covers (56k gets shooped out)
The Swamp has pretty much (d)evolved into a pit of spam and nonsensical threads by users who shall remain unnamed. Because of this I realize that this thread will probably fall flat on its face, but if anyone else but me has Photoshop and is a bit bored these summer nights, it might just work.
The general idea of this thread is to follow a set of "rules" in order to create random fake album covers for fake bands. The results might turn out looking anything from surreal, hilarious, beautiful, or just awful.
The "rules" are:
The first article title on the page is the name of your band.
The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.
The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.
I'll put up some starter images in a short while, and then hope someone else will actually contribute with something that isn't just /b/-tardery. :)
 To make things more flexible, you can always try again if you keep getting people's names as the artist name, or shorten/lengthen the album title with a word or two if the result is too nonsensical.
This (http://www.dafont.com/) is a good source for finding fonts that fit your subject.
I'd love to try this out, but I can't see the third link, it's blocked, could you put it on your Lucas Album please?
07-04-2008, 06:44 PM
Name: Ronald Johnson
Album: Always What I Pleased
You're doing it wrong.
Here are a few quick starter images:
After coming in third in American Idol 2006 because of her cuteness and charming voice, Debbie mostly slipped into obscurity. Her debut album, "Stoop To Admitting It", was a both critical and commercial failure, possibly due to her sudden change from covering poppy feel-good songs to singing sappy ballads about her often bad experiences with boys.
The humorously named college rock-band Cock Marsh play catchy but substance-lacking ironic tunes, often referencing popular culture in their songs. As a hit amongst frat-boys everywhere, you can hardly walk around a campus these days without hearing one of the singles from their sophomore effort "Entitled to the Appellation".
More to come later. :)
07-04-2008, 07:27 PM
Fed up with the rampant materialism of western society, these brave counterculture rebels jam out amongst their many fans in epic indie rock ballads that are often about the LOVE!
07-04-2008, 07:30 PM
Seems fun, might MS paint some **** up on here later : P
07-04-2008, 07:33 PM
Cost Hata Model is a band known for their soothing reggae-pop and happy tunes. They enjoyed great commercial success in the early 1990s, but they fell as quickly as they rose. Over All Too Soon, their third and last album, is consider by many to reflect the internal struggles of the band, and while it recived a lot of critical acclaim, it was a failure commercially.
07-04-2008, 08:01 PM
After reaching world-wide success with their albums "The Problems of Peace" and "Jacques Chirac Ate My Dingo", French indie band Parranquet sought to return to their new age roots with their third collaboration "Obstacles in Your Imagination". Unfortunately, it was met with massive disdain as eager French listeners popped the CD thinking they were going to listen to the latest pretentious indie riff on counterculture, armpit hair and hygiene and got hypnotically droll ambient music instead. The record hit all time low sales, selling only twenty copies, mostly to pompous, stuck up, beret and goatee-wearing struggling artists.
Tazawako Line are often looked upon as pretentious by their peers, but this doesn't seem to stop the post-rock trio from Japan in their quest to make the most complex yet ultimately yawn-inducing instrumental music in the world. Their fifth studio album is an extremely ambitious one, consisting of a single 50-minute track that just seems to go on and on and on...
Barb are sometimes denounced as trend-followers, as the band emerged after the second wave of American modern metal acts such as Lamb Of God and Chimaira gained worldwide recognition. The truth is, however, that their angsty lyrics about isolation and hostility is little more than a second-grade Disturbed, with roots closer to nu-metal than metalcore.
07-04-2008, 10:52 PM
07-04-2008, 11:06 PM
07-04-2008, 11:15 PM
Not long after their debut album The Kids Are Going to Make Out, preeminent death pop band Parasalla has released their new album, Nobody Wants to Read. Described as a combination of Deicide, Dead Kennedys, and Weezer, Parasalla's sound relies on soothing vocal melodies overlaying a harmony of growls and churning atonal metal riffs. The album, with such hits as You Gonna Get It When the Revolution Turns Illibertarian and Stupid Dumb****s Live in the World, is a clear message against the growing anti-intellectualism prevalent within society.
07-04-2008, 11:49 PM
Their first single, ain't too old to earn, was number on on the charts in Florida for over a month. Unfortunately, the band fell apart soon after the album was released. Though no one, even band members, can agree on what caused the rift. The most commonly held belief among industry insiders is that their manager caused the strife so he could direct the bands attention away from the money, which he pocketed for himself.
07-05-2008, 01:23 AM
I'd listen to them.
07-05-2008, 02:35 AM
Alright, so I wanna do this... how do I get the photos from that web site? All it's doing for me when I right click and do 'save as' is it saves a 'spaceball.gif', which is 1x1 pixel of nothing.
07-05-2008, 02:41 AM
The fastest way around it is just doing a print screen.
07-05-2008, 02:43 AM
No, I did that. It saves 1x1 pixels of nothing called 'spaceball.gif'. Tried it four times now, same result.
07-05-2008, 02:52 AM
Combining soul-filled geek rock vocals with entrancing electronica, Thomas Thwing's newest album Force Multiplier is a touching anti-war album that leaves you filled with understanding for all people. However, it failed commercially because of the bad publicity that rumours of the artist's abusive tendencies against minorities.
07-05-2008, 03:34 AM
Pie, I don't know where you got this idea, whether you made it yourself or just copy-pasta-d it from somewhere, I love ya. This is gonna provide tons of fun for the next couple hours. :D
James O. Magara's third album since 2006 is his most ambitious project yet. Using samples from sounds from all over his parent's house, his foley work creates new sounds never heard before. The album title "Happening All The Time" is a reference to the sounds of machinery and just random sounds in his home. The smash hit simply titled "Bong" is a collaboration of over 400 bong slurping sound effects recorded over a six month period. Other hits include the 24 minute long epic "Driver", an ambient mix of sounds from CD drives, garage door motors, and dish washing cycles. The eclectic tastes of his sampling are a delight to behold.
Semitecolo's seventeenth and best known single, "Men Do Not Think", is a unique folk classic recorded in 2000 that explores the psychology in the minds of men. Semitecolo's most controversial song is well known for the combination of flowing melodies of violent folk tales from Northern Italy, punctuated with random screaming, yelling and groaning in the chorus. "Men Do Not Think" is a audible treat for the matured listener, yet has been known to seriously confuse and make those who listen ponder what the hell Semitecolo was thinking.
Pop Rock band "Lompico, California" has often been compared to hit sensational band "Paramore" as the new thing. Lompico's debut album "dont need anything else" [sic] is a critically acclaimed album, receiving a 4 1/2 stars from Rolling Stone Magazine, and futures the hits "Because I Didn't Want To Say So" and "We Live There."
The most highly acclaimed Indy Rock band to come out in years, "To Contradict Other Philosophers" is completely unique album with the structure similar to Coheed and Cambria in that this album's 12 songs is each about a famous philosopher, explaining their beliefs in song, and then disproving each one's beliefs and theories before the end of each song. Voted the number one new talent in 2006, Saint Medan is a band you shouldn't miss.
07-05-2008, 03:36 AM
Take four very odd guys with a love of music and Greek art and you get the strictly instrumental band, Protogenes. Thrust these four guys into depression due to the failure of their first album and you prompt one of them to become the 'lead singer', which gives them an odd sort of 'screaming' sound... which has been proven to cause bleeding from the ears and a complete loss of sanity. Therefore, the title, '... until you're DEAD' is perfectly understandable and undeniably suitable.
07-05-2008, 03:39 AM
No, I did that. It saves 1x1 pixels of nothing called 'spaceball.gif'. Tried it four times now, same result.Flickr puts a 1x1 pixel transparent gif on top of the picture and stretches it over the photo in order to discourage people from downloading the original. Ha! ^_^
If you have adblock, all you have to do to save normally is right click on the picture, say block this image (spaceball.gif), and then ok. After that, just right click and save images from flickr normally. If there's a larger size version of the picture, it will have a "maximize" icon on the top of the image; click that and you can get the larger one without the spaceball gif on top.
Not sure how to do it with IE.
07-05-2008, 03:50 AM
Good thing I have Firefox then :) Thanks!
07-05-2008, 03:54 AM
For IE, I found that sticking "127.0.0.1 http://l.yimg.com" in your hosts file (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hosts_file#Location_and_default_content) does the trick. I don't know if it breaks anything, but it does work! :D
07-05-2008, 04:04 AM
A debut album. We're almost certain that 'List of highways numbered 71' will change their name to 'LOHN 71', as that's what most people are calling them anyway. At any rate, the music on 'travel alone' is wonderful music for a road trip... but only for a road trip. If you don't take road trips, don't buy this CD. If you do however, pop this in your player and you'll wonder how you got to your destination so fast.
07-05-2008, 04:06 AM
A mixture of soft rock, pop, and a flare of jazz.
Electronic experimental indie punk extravaganza.
Alternative rock with folk influences.
This is fun. :p
07-05-2008, 05:44 AM
Excerpt from Rolling Stones Magazine Review by Dathin Surgart, January 2008:
The more I listen to Levanter's newest album, the more I hate it. After listening to every song at least five or six times, and some over a dozen or so, every one of the 17 songs in "There Is No River" fills me with a special kind of rage. If you've never heard one of Levanter's previous eleven albums since 1994, let me sum them up for you:
Levanter is known as a very wonderful of band that is well known in their astonishingly beautiful rhythms and hymns. As my friend and collegue once said to me, and I shall quote him, "If Hitler could listen to this every day before he went to bed, he would have become such a powerful advocate for peace that he would rival Ghandi and the Dalai Lama and Mother Theresa combined in his greatness." And I had to agree with him, Levanter in their last thirteen years has done nothing but create the most beautiful and awe-inspiring music and lyrics that the world has ever heard. Combining smooth, almost lullaby like vocals and calming synth beats and uplifting strings. Though never a commerical success and never going big with a major hit, they have never the less been an insider's secret and has been well known for their amazingly beautiful music.
But that has changed...
Now that you, reader, are up to speed with Levanter's history, I must tell you that something terrible has gone wrong. "There Is No River" is essentially the total opposite of Levanter's previous works. Each song was seemingly created and crafted with pain in mind, each and every note has been deemed fit to inflict pain in the listener. All 17 songs start out with calming, beautiful music as they previous works, but after 15 seconds or so, it instantly converts to this hatred-on-disc soul sucking sound that just destroys my will to live... it literally makes me hate life. The screeching, the yelling, the random notes, the quick tempo changes, the epileptic inducing beats, the random fluctuations of volume, and incredibly distorted sounds just sicken me. Since listening to this album for a week prior to writing this review, I've attempted suicide once with a combination toaster, bathtub, hair dryer, noose, razor, shotgun, prescription drug, alcohol, combo... but then the track would end and would send me back up with it's 15 second long soothing melodies, before plunging me back into self loathing hatred for all life. Vocalist Mira Vestage on the cover just infuriates me, and has now become the symbol of my pain and hatred. If negative stars could be given for an album like this would be possible, I'd give it to "There Is No River". A dark and depressing hate filled void of humanity printed en masse on a Compact Disc. I hate this, I hate life, I hate Levanter, I hate everything.
1/2 Star out of Five
07-05-2008, 06:46 AM
Wow, TiE, I think you just wrote The Ring Three: The Album
One more for now:
The all-female band Verolanuova has an almost-impossible-to-pronounce name and an equally difficult to pinpoint style. It's upbeat but mellow, modern but retro. And what instrument is that, anyway? Despite their obscurity, their sleeper hit first album To Be What One Is topped the charts, and fans are eager for more.
07-05-2008, 01:37 PM
Mac Protip: Just drag the picture into photoshop, no need to circumvent the transparent .gif :D
Zachary Zatara burst onto the scene in the early 90's as one of the few solo artists from a former Eastern Bloc Boy Band to release a follow up album.
07-05-2008, 02:30 PM
Sharon Genish's first album since her hiatus in 2004, she has returned to what she does best: Lyrical story telling to remixes of old ska music with violin concertos and pan flute solos. Again employing the talent of Yvannie Skenzert, the proclaimed world's greatest pan flute player, Sharon Genish sings along to classic ska, retelling stories of past affairs she has had, and how she dealt with them when the wife discovered her relationship.
The breakout hit single, "The Little Man With The Pointy Red Hat", is a tale of her infatuation with a garden gnome and her stories of using it as a sex toy on a Granada Hills neighborhood lawn before getting arrested for indecent exposure and trespassing. Instant classics like this make this album one to remember.
"Into Someone Else's Marriage" also includes the acoustic track, "Eruption (The Pan Flute Version)", the critically acclaimed track featuring the skills of Yvannie Skenzert on the pan flute in his most impressive performance ever. A cover of of Eddie Van Halen's epic guitar shred from the 80's, Skenzert interprets the entire song at full speed with deadly accuracy and perfect pitch. As David Helm of Pan Flute International Magazine wrote in a recent article, "...I didn't think it was physically possible to trill and play arpeggios on the pan flute. I mean, holy sh*t, how did Skenzert attach a whammy bar to his pan flute? I saw videos of him playing, it's not bullsh*t, he actually plays it... with a whammy bar and effects pedals, I mean, holy f*ck..."
So don't miss this next hit album by Sharon Genish, "Into Someone Else's Marriage"!
After their last album, the critically acclaimed "A Very Serious Game", Lough Ramor has gone with a more contemporary style in this album rather than the psychedelic new age they are known for. The album has received mixed reviews thus far. Most reviewers cite the change in style does not suit Lough Ramor, but they like the overall sound. Look forward to Lough Ramor's new album, "Judging People By Appearances"!
07-05-2008, 08:39 PM
Hip hop jamz.
Dinner party hits.
I am amazed at how well this works.
07-06-2008, 02:21 AM
My humble contribution...
07-06-2008, 04:25 AM
The hit punk fusion techno pop rock band Album has released their all new album to critical acclaim... and confusion. With such a confusing "genre" to call their own and a strange band name, it's a wonder if anyone can make sense of them. Featuring the singles "Single", "Track", and "Song". In any case, this confusing album is one that is worth the full $15.99 price tag... more than a dollar.
07-06-2008, 03:29 PM
Darathy's contributions to this thread, since he absolutely refuses to post anywhere other than the KotOR forums:
07-06-2008, 05:26 PM
Review Written by Peter Heines for Alt. Rock Monthly Magazine, June 2008 issue.
"It's really a strange album, Cuneo's first album, first of all, has 14 songs, all named after contagious diseases, yet each song has little or nothing to do with any kind of sickness or disease. Maybe it's a form of irony or something, but when the songs "Acute Diarrhea" and "Typhoid" are actually love songs that are actually pretty decent, it just confuses me.
I can tell that the one song "Syphilis" would probably become Apple's next 'iPod Commercial song, but when you hear the lyrics and begin to understand the song as a story about the musician's time at a club with friends, you'd think it'd be called "The Romp at the Blue Cat Club" -as the line "...And it was a ROMP at the Blue Cat Club, TONIGHT!..." is repeated in the chorus- but no, it's titled "Syphilis." So it's chances are probably slim to none, as who wants to hear the cool song on the next iPod commercial, only to find out that it's called "Syphilis"? Really baffling.
Other than the strange titles, it's a solid album worth any alternative rock fan's collection. (4 stars out of 5)"
07-07-2008, 03:52 PM
...gotta be worth returning to the fold for.
"Heavier than a bag of anvils" - NME
"The best thing to come out of Eastbourne since the road to London" - Melody Maker
"S**t sandwich" - Kerrang
07-07-2008, 04:28 PM
07-07-2008, 05:31 PM
It's not nearly as funny without some description. Because most of these covers would only incite the thought of "huh, that's weird" - unless you get some funny text.
Also, most CDs tend to be perfect squares. Put some effort into it, people.
07-07-2008, 07:24 PM
The weird part is that pretty much every cover so far could be a real band.
07-08-2008, 08:25 AM
^: Yeah, cuz most bands have real freaky names now. :xp:
07-08-2008, 09:01 AM
Hey, a popular photoshop thread from GBS got transplanted into the swamp!
07-08-2008, 09:06 AM
My humble submission:
In her first major-label, non-import recording released Stateside, the lovely Ms. Somayajulu attempts to shed her Bollywood roots, and, with the help of a sizable team of top-Hollywood producers and image consultants, take on a somewhat more controversial (at least in her homeland) sex-kitten/ bad-girl persona in a daring rock/pop/ hip-hop crossover project... with decidedly mixed results.
You may be able to take the girl out of Bollywood, but you can never really take the Bollywood out of the girl... and unfortunately, here's where most of the problems lie.
One can clearly see that the title track was meant to be her take on an Alanis Morisette "You Oughta Know" anthem of pissed off spurned lovers everywhere... but one can only imagine the commercial impact that Alanis may have been able to muster had her breakthrough emotionally unhinged vocal performance had been about all the issues she is encountering in her arranged marriage, backed by a 25 minute odd-meter raga, and played mostly on sitars and tablas.
It doesn't help that her screechingly high-pitched voice, sing-songy delivery, and mangled English pronunciation (even slightly less intelligible than what you might find calling the service help line for Dell Computers...) make what is supposed to be the rants of an angry woman at the ends of her rope sound, at best, slightly peevish. As if she accidentally ruined a batch of curry before her husband brings his boss home for dinner. Which, by the way, is actually one of the very few situations presented in the somewhat cryptic lyrics that can deciphered out of the bizarre poetic imagery that leave the listener (or, more accurately, at least when it comes to the lyrics: reader...) far more baffled than enlightened.
Heh... sticking strictly with the rules of the game, mine actually worked out OK. I just wish the girl in the picture looked slightly more Indian... it would have helped the illusion.
07-09-2008, 03:02 PM
This is the artist's second album, the first being released under her real name, Nikki Summer. The album Malls, Boys, and Other Things I Like, released when she was only 12, was full of "tween" bubblegum pop; its grittiest song was "Kitten Broke Her Paw". It enjoyed some commercial success, but Nikki fell off the radar. Eight years later, she has resurfaced as Deitmar Schaurhammer, inexplicably named after an East German bobsledder. Her new album, Undue Depression in Adversity, retains the bubblegum pop sound but with much more mature themes, like child abuse, animal mutilation, and STD's.
london metal exchange's album, finished; it is abandoned is quite possibly the most depressing and distasteful group of songs ever gathered in one place. With songs like "God created the World, then filled it with jerks", "Punching Mother Teresa", "You're Different, And That's Bad", "How I Killed Santa" and "You have No Future", it is sure to fill the listener with dread and disgust. However, the tunes and rhythm are so catchy it is impossible to turn off. It is sure to be a bigger commercial success than their debut self-titled album, which featured songs about the prices on the London Metal Exchange (oddly, their song "Molybdenum" enjoyed unexplained success among members of an online Star Wars forum known as "Yoda's Swamp").
Rygar: the Battle of Argus is not your ordinary start up band. They have tried to make sure that every song has a very unique sound. Not that every song sounds different but that there is one very strange sound in each track. For example their first song "Who?" (a ballad about a schizophrenic friend's voyage of self-discovery) features three seconds of what can only be described as rabid kittens on a blackboard. Track two "What?" (about hearing loss) has what I believe to be the bludgeoning of a watermelon. Next up is "When?" (thoughts on the discovery of a tattoo believed to have been obtained while drunk) has the sound of a Wii controller in a blender (a statement about their ongoing battle with nintendo and Tecmo over an upcoming game release with the same name as their band). "Where?" (about waking up in a strange bed with a hangover next to someone they don't know) ends with a CD being cooked in a microwave. "Why?" (ruminations on the existance of God) has a bucket of cow hearts being poured on a counter. The bonus track "How?" (an obscenity laced tirade about assembling furniture from ikea) begins with the sound of a brutal sledgehammer attack on a bucket of pudding. Of course these sounds are up to interpretation and it has been rumored that there are actually several different versions of the album each with their own complement of unique sounds.
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