View Full Version : CHEWIE PUT THAT EWOK DOWN!!!!!

Stealth Echo
04-30-2000, 07:44 PM

A furious lightsaber duel is underway. DARTH VADER is backing LUKE SKYWALKER towards the end of the gantry. A quick move by Vader, chops off Luke's hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft. Luke backs away. He looks around, but realizes there's nowhere to go but straight down.

Darth Vader: Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.

Luke: He told me enough! He told me you killed him!

Darth Vader: No... I am your father!

Luke: No, it's not true! It's impossible.

Darth Vader: Search your feelings... you know it to be true...

Luke: NO!

Darth Vader: Yes, it is true... and you know what else? You know that brass droid of yours?

Luke: Threepio?

Darth Vader: Yes... Threepio... I built him... when I was 7 years old...

Luke: No...

Darth Vader: Seven years old! And what have you done? Look at yourself, no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate your own ship out of the swamp...

Luke: I destroyed your precious Death Star!

Darth Vader: When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!

Luke: Well, it's not my fault...

Darth Vader: Oh, here we go... "Poor me... my father never gave me what I wanted for my birthday... boo hoo, my daddy's the Dark Lord of the Sith...waahhh wahhh!"

Luke: Shut up...

Darth Vader: You're a slacker! By the time I was you're age, I had exterminated the Jedi knights!

Luke: I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon

Darth Vader: Oh, for the love of the Emperor... 10 years old, winner of the Boonta Eve Open... Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer... right here baby!

Luke looks down the shaft. Takes a step towards it.

Darth Vader: I was wrong... You're not my kid... I don't know whose you are, but you sure ain't mine...

Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the shaft.

Darth Vader looks after him.

Darth Vader: Get a haircut!

04-30-2000, 07:56 PM
Damn, that was funny! http://www.roguesquadron.net/forums/smile.gif http://www.roguesquadron.net/forums/smile.gif

04-30-2000, 09:31 PM
Hilarious!!!!! Nice work!

What- You think you're some kind of Jedi, waving your hand around like that?
We're doomed!

Nute Gunray
04-30-2000, 10:10 PM
Second (sorry http://www.roguesquadron.net/forums/smile.gif) funniest thing I've ever read!

I have far more interesting and important things to do with whatever time humanity has left than fretting about this load of BS...like hierarchizing my extensive collection of taped "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?" episodes by lifelines and final answers.

04-30-2000, 11:54 PM
Encore! Encore!

Don't do things like wear stinkey green tennis shoes, they may get a lot of attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love...Ack...Phhht!!!

05-01-2000, 12:23 AM
Very nice. Don't listen to Nute he's just some sort of hippocritical cretin. He has no appreciation for funny, good work.

05-01-2000, 06:23 AM
<font size=1>Can't...work...buttons! Laughing...too...hard--!</font>

Stealth Echo
05-01-2000, 07:56 PM
Thank you all
I might post mre of these

The Master
05-01-2000, 07:59 PM
Now if you don't think thats funny you don't know what funny is! It was great! Now... write another. And thats an order!

05-02-2000, 07:42 AM
That was very nice SE. http://www.roguesquadron.net/forums/wink.gif

does any one remember the story that was wrote about SW and ST, the cross over thing, and who wrote it?

It has been about 6-7 months ago.....

05-02-2000, 09:41 AM
ROFLMAO ! http://www.roguesquadron.net/forums/biggrin.gif

05-03-2000, 06:12 AM
Imladil remembers! It was the handiwork of Rebel Jediknight, but I haven't seen her hereabouts of late...

The Master
05-03-2000, 07:37 PM
Ahhhhhhhh! I see.......