View Full Version : What a lovely time of year
12-21-2001, 11:42 AM
I was just wondering what you guys were doing for the holidays? I'm going to NC for two weeks to visit family.
12-21-2001, 05:13 PM
I want to see "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" (the original), and "A Christmas Story"...it's tradition man...
12-21-2001, 06:47 PM
Spread christmas cheer with the aid of booze and a base ball bat.
12-21-2001, 06:56 PM
I'm thinking of turning off the lights in my room, breaking the windows, barracading the door, turning on music with 18 minute songs, and chanting happy thoughts while I'm curled up in the fetal position on the floor. Merry christmas.
12-21-2001, 11:05 PM
no fair, all of you guys are gonna have fun, i'm just gonna drink a $300 bottle of wine and play strip poker with my 5 supermodel girlfriends in a 3 story cabin in the french alps. *sigh*:(
12-21-2001, 11:43 PM
I'm gonna go weigh those supermodels.
12-21-2001, 11:53 PM
You're going to eat them aren't you, you cannibal bastard!
12-21-2001, 11:54 PM
ONLY TWO OF THEM, jeez. I didn't expect a spanish inquistion!
12-22-2001, 12:13 AM
Now now, no fighting, you should share your models, if he wants to eat one or two of them i say let him
12-22-2001, 12:27 AM
Wow, this has degraded.
It'd take all five of em to make even remotely a meal.
12-22-2001, 12:50 AM
That kinda depends on how much they weigh now doesn't it
12-22-2001, 02:29 AM
Not with Jesters appetite.
12-22-2001, 09:53 AM
This is the fourth discussion you're having about cannibalism. Pick up the pace, or people will think we're almost normal.
Just kidding. There's no danger anyone mistaking us for normal.
12-22-2001, 12:45 PM
Good job iisacc, you killed it!
12-22-2001, 01:10 PM
But did he eat it?
12-22-2001, 01:16 PM
he just sucked all the fun out of this thread, where's all you chrismas cannibalism spirit, man?:(
12-22-2001, 01:33 PM
he probably just ate a bad elf.
12-22-2001, 01:35 PM
Elf cannibalism? NOW THATS JUST SICK!
well, its not really cannibalism. Aren't elves a different species?
12-22-2001, 01:37 PM
Yea. And most of the christmas ones are evil, and made up of jello.
12-22-2001, 01:39 PM
..and if they're really evil, its tapeoka
12-22-2001, 01:44 PM
12-22-2001, 01:46 PM
And santa...well lets just say: not even Bill Cosby would endorse what he's made out of.:barf:
12-22-2001, 06:43 PM
12-22-2001, 06:45 PM
NO DAMMIT! THAT WOULD BE TO EEEEEEEEEEASY! HE'S MADE OUT OF C-4 , AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!:laughing:
12-22-2001, 08:29 PM
Then how does he manage to smoke his pipe?
12-22-2001, 08:34 PM
well...uh, i mean his whole body isn't C-4. his head and lungs and stuff are like regular flesh, and he does have bones. BUT THE REST OF HIM IS PUUUUURE C-4!!!
Ew, I didn't think he'd have bones...
12-22-2001, 10:51 PM
I'm scared what if Santa explodes in my living room? and his bones smash me in the head and I die?
What then? What will you do without me?
12-22-2001, 11:20 PM
don't worry, santa only blows up if he senses danger. Then he will explode, sending peices of bone and coal hurling at speeds beyond that of sound, able to penetrate a 6 foot thick wall of titanium! And in his old age, he gets offly paranoid, so you better make sure your air conditioner doesn't turn on in the middle of the night or...well....KABOOM. HAHA. Merry christmas!:explode: :gift: :gift:
12-22-2001, 11:26 PM
Boy I'm glad it's too cold here to turn on the air conditioner... wait I don't have one. I guess my fears can be lessened. (Wait let me guess, now you gonna feed me all sorts of other stories in an effort to make me wet my pants, right?)
12-22-2001, 11:37 PM
wow, you're good:
anyway, he can also sense the slightest vibrations and sounds. He can go off because your dog sighed, or simply because he heard snoring. and...well...I didn't want to say this but, hes an offly mean guy, so if you live by yourself he'll explode out of cruelty (he doesn't like blowing up families, he made be made of C-4 but he's still human). And since he's a vampire, did you guys know that?, he's very sensative to light, even night lights or candles! what did i forget?.....hmmmm...oh yeah, he hates people under 25 (calls them "wipper-snappers")! AAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!
12-22-2001, 11:46 PM
Well, I don't have a dog, and I don't snore (honestly... don't look at me like that) I live with my family do there's another problem solved... I'll turn on a night lite and I belive in Buffy, she'll come save me if he attacks!!! But.... I'm only 16!!! I'm a wippersnapper!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I mean yes, screw you old fat Santa!
12-22-2001, 11:49 PM
did i mention he visits forums often? and he also killed Buffy...a while ago...I'M SERIOUS!
12-22-2001, 11:54 PM
You couldn't possibly mean these forums... could you?
12-22-2001, 11:56 PM
hehe, EVERY FORUM. he can also smell fear
12-23-2001, 12:03 AM
Ok I can believe that he can smell fear, and that he's probably hunting me down right now, but I refuse to believe he killed Buffy! That would be sooooo unfair. Anyways... aren't you worried? or are you an accomplis of his?
12-23-2001, 12:12 AM
lets just say i have a 10 year supply of my own invention: Santa-B-gone. Buffy isn't dead, she's just ... uh ... locked up ....uh, yeah thats it!
12-23-2001, 12:27 AM
So, this Santa-B-Gone... how much would it cost me?
12-23-2001, 12:29 AM
well, it is radioactive, and its also a carcinogen, and it burns....alot. So i'd say about $500 a bottle
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