View Full Version : Only in America...

07-16-2002, 09:33 AM
Here is some stuff I found while surfing the net (LMAO):

1. Only in America.....can a pizza get to
your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America......are there
handicap parking places in front of a
skating rink.

3. Only in America......do drugstores
make the sick walk all the way to the
back of the store to get their
prescriptions while healthy people can buy
cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America......do people order
double cheeseburgers, large fries,
and a diet coke.

5. Only in America......do banks leave
both doors open and then chain the
pens to the counters.

6. Only in America......do we leave cars
worth thousands of dollars in the
driveway and put our useless junk in the

7. Only in America......do we use
answering machines to screen calls and
then have call waiting so we won't miss a
call from someone we didn't want
to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......do we buy hot
dogs in packages of ten and buns in
packages of eight.

9. Only in America......do we use the
word 'politics' to describe the
process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning
'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America......do they have
drive-up ATM machines with Braille

07-16-2002, 09:42 AM
:lol: :rofl: :lol: Pretty funny, and it is all true. :D

07-16-2002, 09:43 AM
why is everyone anti-american? i dont want to start an argument so please only worthy responses.

edit- im not saying this thead is anti-american but ive noticed a lot of tension towards america

Guardian Omega
07-16-2002, 09:45 AM

07-16-2002, 09:46 AM
partly my fault

partly british (and other) patriotism

partly bush giving u lot a reputation for stupidity

thats what id blame if i were american

07-16-2002, 10:24 AM
I'm not anti-american by any means, but that stuff was pretty funny. :D

07-16-2002, 10:33 AM
You dont have to be Anti-American to enjoy Humor. Even if its about America.:)
Funny stuff!:thumbsup:

Darth Talliusc
07-16-2002, 10:56 AM
very funny, also sad how much of that is also true in canada (100%) ah well, its like that old quote goes "if you couldnt laugh at the odd things in life then you couldnt respond to most of life"

07-16-2002, 11:08 AM
Canada is funny and some Amercian things are funny! I am an American an i find those funny and true!:D

07-16-2002, 11:14 AM
i agree it was funny and im by far Patriotic but just in general ive notice some animosity toward america. an example would be the which is your favorite sport thead. when americans where talking about american football, right away people where starting to build tension. well i guess i was just curious on "why" and i feel im at defense becasue i grew up in a us military family (Unfortunately)

07-16-2002, 12:20 PM
nah there's just people from all over the world here-- and america stands out from all of them because of *cough*bush*cough*. even though im from the US, there's no denying it- bush gives this country a shameful name. he represents that mtv sort of look that makes us all seem like superficial dopes. and that's hardly the case. but you have to admit- george dubbya has a pretty damn good administration

07-16-2002, 12:36 PM
Yeah, I've seen this list before... and it's still funny. :lol:

Pardon me while I add a few more, even if a couple are a stretch...

Only in America.... are there more choices of beer and liquor at the market than any kind of foodstuff available.

Only in America.... will you find some rather interesting stores next to each other...

-Real Examples-
Jenny Craig right next to Dunken Doughnuts.
A councelling center right by "Totally Nuts."
Lipstik (a strip club) right next to "Kiddie Kampus." (Hey mommy, what's THAT?)

... and two of those three are in your town.

Only in America.... can "Rush Hour" last all day long.

and finally,

Only in America.... can you get free food, free beer, and free amounts of "Designer" items... but no free health care. :rolleyes:

And I'm American, at that. Two of the three store proximity examples really are from my home town, too. :rolleyes:

Edit: Oh, and I almost forgot:
Only in America.... Can they serve piping hot coffee that you promptly spill on your lap over a speed-bump.... and you win $32 million dollars for it in court. :rolleyes:

07-16-2002, 12:56 PM
It's funny 'cuz it's true!!!

- Homer J. Simpson

07-16-2002, 01:01 PM
hehee...the various freedoms we americans fight for...heheheh