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View Full Version : (Very) short poem: I love standing in the rain with my clipboard and my gun


GendoTheGreat
02-06-2003, 09:06 AM
This came too me as I was thinking about a job I had awhile back as a guard for one of those secured housing estates. Quiet, easy, night work - everything I love in a job. The poem isn't very good, but the job was. I really miss that job.

I love standing in the rain with my clipboard and my gun
Do you have a pass?
Yes? Go on through sir
No? Move along sir
I love standing in the rain with my clipboard and my gun

amadeus
02-06-2003, 09:38 PM
I like it! I really like it! Good poem. Sounds like an intersting job too. What's a secured housing estate?

GendoTheGreat
02-07-2003, 12:48 AM
A neighborhood surrounded by a wall with a big steel gate and guards at the front. Usually housing very rich people, or very old people. Mine had rich people in it, which is why they gave us guns.

Metallus
02-07-2003, 01:59 AM
Ah, they have those in the US, too. They're referred to as "Gated Communities" sometimes. Nice poem, but I don't think I ever want to live in one of those places.

GendoTheGreat
02-07-2003, 02:52 AM
Me neiher, but guarding one was great. Got a tad boring sometimes, though. No internet access like the job I had before my current one. Speaking of which, I should get back to it soon, before I smoke myself to death and gain 50 pounds sitting in front of the computer for hours a day.

Darth Eggplant
02-07-2003, 11:58 AM
ah dear sweat Sympatico.
proud son and soldier of the middle class
on the front line with gun in hand
protecting the Alpha society
from the dregs of Delta's and Epsilons.
forever doomed to be a Beta,
no hopes of being accepted by the elite
and desperately trying to escape the fate
of D's and E's.
*this is not social commentary
meant to DIS you Gendo, take note.*

and this post is also an excuse
for song lyrics, and I have just
the song in mind.

Capitalism

There's nothing wrong
with capitalism
There's nothing wrong
with free enterprise
Don't try to make me feel guilty
I'm so tired of hearing you cry

There's nothing wrong
with making some profit
If you ask me
I'll say it's just fine
There's nothing wrong
with wanting to live nice
I'm so tired
of hearing you whine
About the revolution
Bringing down the rich
When was the last time
you dug a ditch, baby!

If it ain't one thing
Then it's the other
Any cause
that crosses your path
Your heart bleeds
for anyone's brother
I've got to tell you
you're a pain in the ass

You criticize
with plenty of vigor
You rationalize
everything that you do
With catchy phrases
and heavy quotations
And everybody is crazy but you

You're just a middle class socialist brat
From a suburban family
and you never really had to work
And you tell me
that you've got to get back
To the struggling masses,
whoever they are
You talk, talk, talk
about the suffering and pain
Your mouth is bigger
than your entire brain
What the hell do you know about
suffering and pain, ya dumb ****.

There's nothing wrong
with capitalism
There's nothing wrong
with free enterprise
Don't try to make me feel guilty
I'm so tired of hearing you cry

There's nothing wrong
with making some profit
If you ask me
I'll say it's just fine
There's nothing wrong
with wanting to live nice
I'm so tired of hearing you whine

You're just a middle class socialist brat
From a suburban family
and you never really had to work
And you tell me
that you've got to get back
To the struggling masses,
whoever they are
You talk, talk, talk
about the suffering and pain
Your mouth is bigger than your entire brain

There's nothing wrong with capitalism
There's nothing wrong with capitalism
There's nothing wrong with capitalism
There's nothing wrong with capitalism

Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh, ahh!

GendoTheGreat
02-07-2003, 12:17 PM
No diss percieved and none intended I'm sure. I don't know about the "gun in hand" bit though; they were ex-police issue 22s circa BC. The piece of **** probably would have fallen to pieces had I touched it, much less fired it. But you better believe I could throw that sucker pretty hard; a great deterrent for the dangerous door-to-door salespeople and deadly Mormons we dealt with every eight weeks or so.

Darth Eggplant
02-07-2003, 12:36 PM
ooo scarry Moromons
wearing their magical undergarments
( ie:translates magical underwear)
before they go out crusading
all called elder.
hmmm Elder Eggplant
*yes? no? maybe?*
actually we have a mormon church
close to my home
and I can not leave my home,
and I can not leave the house
without one of them approaching me
asking me if I know about
Jesus Christ.
*and I think well....
white male, living in the 20th century
in a majority christian\Judaic culture,
in the western hemisphere,
have I ever heard of someone called
Jesus?
no actually never heard of him.;) *

GendoTheGreat
02-15-2003, 12:40 AM
I could never be a Mormon, I'd feel stupid having to call kids half my age "Elder".