View Full Version : Lets start a bar Fight!!!

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12-14-2003, 07:03 PM
*Resurrects himself from the dead and looks to Darth Zaius.*

You've got to be joking! Though, like you said, too bad you have to die.

*Charges Zaius and slices him in two.*

Zaius is out for 1 post.

12-14-2003, 08:27 PM
*Does :jab: to topshot so hard, that his cheek breaks. :p*

topshot is out for two posts.

12-14-2003, 09:42 PM
*jumps on a ewok glider and flies over perfectagent... Then drops bowling balls in his head*


[_PerfectAgent_ is out for 2]

12-15-2003, 03:54 AM
*Feeds MMMPIE!!!! to a hungry creature*

MMMPIE!!! is digested for 3 posts

12-15-2003, 06:57 PM
mennonite super-jumps onto MMMPIE!!!'s ewok glider, which MMMPIE!!! abandoned.

[MMMPIE!!! can never use his Ewok glider again.]

As mennonite is a science whiz and genius, he invokes the Force to create an acid that has a pH of 0.2, which is so acidic that it could melt adamantium in a second. mennonite then pours a single drop of the acid, which I call SuperAcid, onto |GG| Crow_Nest's head.

[Crow_nest's hair and skin is melting off for two (2)posts]

12-15-2003, 11:39 PM
*Shoots a hole into the glider Mennonite stole as he never got off.*

Mennonite is falling for two posts.

Darth Homer
12-16-2003, 02:52 AM
*summons a Coopa Troopa & slams it down onto PerfectAgent*

PerfectAgent is a green blob on the sidewalk for 2 posts

12-16-2003, 04:14 AM
*Uses the energy from the Chaos Emerald to smite Homer with a Chaos Spear attack.*

Darth Homer is stunned for 2 posts.

Jabbas WhOr3
12-16-2003, 04:34 AM
**Me being an innocent bystander is caught in the crossfire and beheaded**

Jabba is dead forever :p :D :(

12-16-2003, 07:48 AM
Agh! I've taken the life of an innocent child! These hands of mine are soiled with the blood of a little lamb! Agh!

*Jumps off a cliff and lands face first through a spike.*

I'm dead for 3 posts.

12-16-2003, 03:53 PM
*runs to get a battering ram, just to discovers that the only ram he can come up with is filled with flesh-eating maggots... Starts hurling maggots at PerfectAgent*

[PerfectAgent has no flesh for 2 posts]

12-16-2003, 07:48 PM
*mennonite sprays himself with bug spray as to prevent perfectAgent's maggots from hurting me.
*mennonite recovers from his glider fall, more determined than ever.
mennonite gives MMMPIE!!! a pie full of bees.
MMMPIE!!!: Thanks! Awesome!

MMMPIE!!! is out for one [1] post because of bees stinging his innards

mennonite sees Darth Homer, and decides to assist him. He then gives him rubber, as it is immune to electric shocks.

Darth Homer
12-16-2003, 09:20 PM
*Thanks Mennonite for the rubber, but accidently pushes him over the cliff onto topshot*

Mennonite is dead for 2 posts


12-16-2003, 10:22 PM
*Possesses Darth Homer and shoots himself.*

Darth Homer is dead for 2 posts.

12-16-2003, 11:20 PM
*topshot turns and sees Kain standing there*
*Kain lifts him by the throat and snaps it*

topshot is dead for 2 posts

12-16-2003, 11:30 PM
*Slams Kain with a computer keyboard.*

Kain is down for one post.

12-17-2003, 12:23 AM
*Grabs the keyboard and hits CTRL + Alt + Delete, therefore shutting down perfect agent's brain.*

Perfect agent is out for 2 posts trying to re-activate his brain

12-17-2003, 11:27 AM
*gets out a cell phone and holds it to Joetheeskimos ear... MOHAHAHA! then it rings and joe gets the dangerous rays into his brain!*

[joe is out with cancer for one post]

12-17-2003, 12:36 PM
*Chucks an Iron Maiden album towards MMMPIE!!! as if it were a shuriken throwing knife.*

[MMMPIE!!! is busy trying to remove the disk from his chest for 2 posts.]

12-17-2003, 12:53 PM
Vegietto blocks the album and throws it back at topshot hitting him in the head making him unconcious

(Topshot out for five posts)

12-17-2003, 06:37 PM
*mennonite observes that this is supposed to be a bar fight, which should take place in a bar.
*mennonite gives everyone bait and lures them back into the bar, except PerfectAgent.
*mennonite steals one of the pictures from the album that topshot and vegietto were using.
*mennonite tosses it like a frisby right at vegietto.

[vegietto is choking from an enormous paper cut for three [3] posts]
I know, don't paper cuts hurt like heck?

12-18-2003, 08:22 PM
*grabs Mennonite by the neck, saying "DO.NOT.DISS.MAIDEN!". he then chucks a screwdriver into mennonites cheek and screws out his tongue...*

[MennoniteHobbit is out for 2 posts trying to find his tongue...]

Darth Homer
12-18-2003, 11:32 PM
*Homer pulls out a weird looking machine from his sub-space pocket. He then grabs MMMPIE and stuffs him into a small compartment & turns the machine on.*

*MMMPIE is digitized & placed into the middle of the Normandy Invasion form Medal of Honor.*

MMPIE is riddled w/ bullets from a machine gun nest & dead for 2 posts

Captain Wilson
12-24-2003, 01:57 AM
press a huge button

captain wilson then beheads darth homer who becomes out for 3 posts

12-24-2003, 04:54 AM
*tears out Wilson's spine, then proceeds to beat him with it*
*then Mennonite tries to get the jump on Kain, but gets choked to death with Wilson's spine*

Captain Wilson and MennoniteHobbit are dead for 2 posts

12-24-2003, 06:29 AM
*strangles Kain Homer Simpson style*

kain = out for 2 posts

12-24-2003, 11:26 PM
*Chops off Crows limbs Rune-style, and starts playing headball with crows head*

[crows head is out for 3, the rest of him is out for 2]

12-27-2003, 10:27 PM
Hmmm. What to do, what to do, what to do.........Ah!

*Pulls out a machete and chops off MMMPIE!!!'s head.*

*Pie is dead for 3 posts.*

Darth Homer
12-29-2003, 02:24 AM
*Summons army of angry slapping penguins & charges them at Topshot*

Topshot is being slapped by countless penguins for 2 posts

12-29-2003, 04:08 AM
*Summons crows and commands them to start pecking penguins and homer* :p

homer = out for 2 postz

12-29-2003, 07:36 PM
i use my jedi mind powers and turn your animals against you both of you peck to death.

(Grow and Homer out of 3 posts)

12-30-2003, 12:55 AM
*Kicks vegietto into a nearby carbon freezing chamber and activates temporary freezing.*

Vegietto is frozen like Han Solo for 2 posts.

01-09-2004, 12:23 AM
Originally posted by MennoniteHobbit
*mennonite observes that this is supposed to be a bar fight, which should take place in a bar.
*mennonite gives everyone bait and lures them back into the bar, except PerfectAgent.
*Get's the Lam.... station wagon and runs it into the bar it explodes*

topshot is recovering from the explosion for three posts.
_PerfectAgent is recovering from the explosion for three posts. D'oh!

01-14-2004, 05:37 AM
*pours bleach into agents mouth until be bleaches to death*

agent = out for 1 post

01-14-2004, 12:30 PM
vegietto has a freestyle contest with topshot and raps him to exhaustion

Topshot out for 5 posts

01-15-2004, 05:18 AM
*chokes Crow*
He's already got posts against him! You can't add to them!
*Crow dies*

*Crow is dead for 2 posts*

Darth Homer
01-15-2004, 11:23 PM
*comes running up in a Police Uniform*

You there! You just strangled that man! You're coming with Me!!

Kain is behind bars for 2 posts

*grabs Vegietto*

Look, you can't hit someone who's already down, you did it to me, you did it to someone else, stop it

*chokes Vegietto, he dies*


*points in a direction* THE HORROR!!

*runs in opposite direction*

01-15-2004, 11:50 PM
*Chases Darth Homer with a mallet, thinking he's an evil penguin.*

Homer is being chased by *God-like booming voice*"ME!!!!!" for 1 post.

Was that a little too out of control??? :confused:

01-16-2004, 02:58 AM
It's sad to see that this is the only active thread happening in this forum. Ah well, I know this place will pick up soon and better and better topics will come about.

01-16-2004, 09:13 AM
Indeed. =(

I think it will pick up close to the release of Episode 3.

*throws grenade into room and runs*

01-16-2004, 10:42 AM
*quickly picks up the greanade and throws it at topshot*


topshot is out for 2 posts.

01-18-2004, 06:27 PM
Originally posted by Leemu Taos
It's sad to see that this is the only active thread happening in this forum. Ah well, I know this place will pick up soon and better and better topics will come about.

This is exactly why I started bein a swampie months ago. At least there there are more topics of discussion. If the parts of the LFN start running dry of good topics of disc., I may choose to leave LF to never return again. In the mean while, Im still here, lucky for all of you. ;) :D

01-19-2004, 05:42 AM
*bashes Mennonite down with a large mace*

Mennonite is quite clearly dead for 3 posts

01-19-2004, 10:14 AM
*uses a ballpoint pen and stabs kain in the heart*

Kain is dead for 2 posts

01-19-2004, 01:25 PM
*Sends Crow loads and loads of spam-mail*

Crow is drowning in spam for 2 posts

01-19-2004, 04:56 PM
*Sends Death to Pie's house.*

Pie and the Grim Reaper are partying for 3 posts.

01-20-2004, 08:18 AM
*Sabretooth walks in*
*Opens his money pouch*
*Takes out Super-Nuclear Bomb*
*Clicks on the button*

After one post, the bomb's time will be over and...

All current members in this post will be boomed for 3 posts.

Of course, new members may start off.

Right guys?

Darth Rythe
01-20-2004, 08:55 AM
I walk in, oh crap, BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I die................woop!

01-20-2004, 09:29 AM
*uses hell bullet and shoots rythe and sends him to hell*

Rythe is trapped in hell and begs for his life for 3 posts.


01-20-2004, 09:15 PM
*Feels that was SO inappropriate of Crow to send my former apprentice to hell that Mr. Nest eventually becomes digitized and attacked by a computer virus.*

Crow_Nest is fighting the Blaster worm for the crown of infectiousness(for 3 posts).* :evil2:

Darth Homer
01-21-2004, 03:55 AM
*walks up to Topshot, taps him on the shoulder, & then hides*

Topshot is twirling around looking for whoever tapped his shoulder for 2 posts

01-21-2004, 05:13 AM
*beats Sabertooth to within an inch of his life*
No, you can't do that. *stomps him a bit more before leaving*

01-21-2004, 11:04 PM
Originally posted by Kain
*beats Sabertooth to within an inch of his life*
No, you can't do that. *stomps him a bit more before leaving*

Can't do what? :confused:

*mennonite is normally a pacifist, but now decides to fight someone.

*mennonite digitizes Kain to the Windows XP desktop.
*mennonite then downloads Desktop Destroyer from www.gemtree.com.
*mennonite mutilates Kain (the background of the desktop) with various hammers, phasers, chainsaws, flamethrowers, machine guns, and even termites!

Kain is stuck as the background of the desktop mutilated for two posts

*as a safety precaution, MennoniteHobbit then digitizes himself into computer

MennoniteHobbit is infected by a Backdoor/SubSeven Trojan for a post

01-22-2004, 09:51 AM
*Infects homer's PC with a deadly computer virus that could cause it to selfdesdruct :p*

hobbit is busy fighting with the horse for 2 post.

Darth Homer
01-22-2004, 10:01 AM
*runs away from the computer before it explodes*

*tramples over Crow in desperate attempt to get far enough away*

Crow is down for 2 posts

Computer explodes after 3 posts, anyone in the blast radius is instantly down for 2 posts

*anyone who is up at the time of the detonation, but does not escape the explosion in the next 3 posts is considered within the blast radius*

01-22-2004, 07:01 PM
Originally posted by |GG|Crow_Nest
*Infects homer's PC with a deadly computer virus that could cause it to selfdesdruct :p*

hobbit is busy fighting with the horse for 2 post.

Hey crow, I thought that u couldn't KO me if i already am KO'd. Oh well.

MennoniteHobbit sees everybody's body on the floor.
Hobbit decides to inject himself with cold water, just in case there's an explosion within the next 5 posts. If there is im not ko'd.

Hey, if Homer is dead, I'll leave him alone. If he's still alive, I'll bury him that way for two posts.
(Sorry, didn't know if Homer was dead or not)

01-23-2004, 02:11 AM
Originally posted by MennoniteHobbit
Hey crow, I thought that u couldn't KO me if i already am KO'd. Oh well.

Doh, i made a typo :(

01-23-2004, 10:42 PM
Well, now........let's have some fun.

*Tosses Crow out the window with the power of his mind.*

That was fun.....I'm bored now........

*Disappears back to the nexus from which he came.*

Crow is falling through the sky for 1 post.

01-27-2004, 10:08 AM
"Honey, I'm home!" :D
*throws a crazy barrel o' monkeys at Topshot*

Topshot is out for 2 posts beeing eaten by monkeys

Darth Homer
01-28-2004, 03:46 AM
Hey, that Barrel O' Monkeys thing was kinda cool.

*grabs barrel and stuffs MMMPIE!!! into it*

MMMPIE!!! is stuck inside barrel for 2 posts

*sits down at bar, looks at broken bartender droid*

Nuts, looks like I'll have to make my own Flaming Moe...

*jumps behind bar*

Boba Rhett
01-28-2004, 04:29 AM
*walks in with his freshly prepared sandwhich*

Hey guys, what's u-

*is bumped by MMMPIE!!! in his barrel and drops his sandwhich*


You will all die for this.

*picks up barrel and throws it into crowd*

MMMPIE!!!, Homer, and Crow are out for two posts*

01-28-2004, 10:36 PM
*Returns from the nexus of which he came. Eyes Rhett, magnoclamps his pants to his hips (ouch!), and tries to attempt an assassination of the ol' smokin' Yoda.*

Foolish admin! Fear my power! :p

*Grabs the yoink stick and turns him into a sandwich.*

Rhett is a sandwich for 1 post.

01-29-2004, 05:01 PM
((I was already out when Rhett threw me, so it doesnt count for me))
*gets out of barrel, brushes off monkey droppings, and sees a lovely sandwich without pants just lying on the floor. Walks over and eats the sandwich...
"MMM....FRUITDELICIOUS! ((i think i saw that on a american commercial once ^^))*
*Dies from poison*

I am out for 2 posts due to food poisoning

01-30-2004, 04:17 AM
*Miniminzes topshot with a shrink ray and steps on em*

topshot is flatened for 2 posts.

Darth Homer
01-31-2004, 02:31 AM
*Force pulls shrink ray away from Crow & shoots him with it*

*Crow shrinks down, but his clothes don't*

Crow is an inch tall & naked for 3 posts

Lightsaber Lad
02-02-2004, 07:12 PM
Lightsaber larry comes in and picks out his lightsaber and says Hire me kills of the Barkeeper and gets for a suspicuis reason knocked down by Vader who starts to scream iam your father Larry Larry sais noooooooooooooooooooooooo and pick up topshot and trow him against Vader who is killed and topshot is knocked out for @ posts

Lightsaber Lad
02-02-2004, 07:14 PM
i mean 2 posts

02-02-2004, 07:28 PM
A newbie has decided to join our little bar fight... when will newbies learn to stay away?

Now, since you have decided to come here... I have decided to scheme...

Oh well, I'll be on ur side, NEWBIE, but for now... put at least SOME punctuation in ur posts... hard to understand urs.

*MennoniteHobbit picks up a Bespin Gem Diver facility gem, points it at Lightsaber Dad...

Lightsaber Dad is mesmerized via his beady little eyes for... let's say, 3 (three) posts?
Hey, don't be offended... welcome to the bar fight thread!

Lynk Former
02-02-2004, 08:27 PM
Oh dear god. Rhett! Not you too!!

02-03-2004, 06:45 AM
*Beheads hobbit with an axe*

Hobbit is busy looking for his head for 2 posts

Lightsaber Lad
02-03-2004, 03:07 PM
how can yu order a drink i killed that Bar guy didnyt i

02-03-2004, 10:08 PM
Hey Lightsaber Dad! You stole my avatar! NOW... YOU... SHALL... PAY!!!!!!!!!


oh, and by the way, while ur too busy thinking about "how can you order a drink...", I decide to... um... wait for it.... wait for it.... oh YEAH!!

*MennoniteHobbit, yup, that's me, takes Lightsaber Dad's lightsaber, and stabs lightsaber lad with it....

mennonitehobbit: "You know, i would try to use something else to injure you, but your lightsaber seemed handy..."

LIGHTSABER LAD is suffering from a newbie's skin puncture for a post...

02-04-2004, 12:53 AM
Originally posted by Glaive
*strolls into the bar (ducking from a stray bottle launched from the crowd)


*draws his vibro sword and runs at the crowd


*beheads lighsabre lad, then walks to the bar to order a drink.

Foolish swordsman! Feel my wrath!

*Picks up an Armorslayer (from Fire Emblem) and beheads Glaive with it.*

Glaive is looking for his head. (He's out for 1 post.)

Glaive v.1
02-04-2004, 07:12 AM
*Glaive finds his head in quick time
ha ha ha topshot it'll take more than that to stop me.

*pulls out a thermal detonator /lol

*graps toshot and rams the detonator down this troat a runs behind a table.

Thats a spicy meata ball ha ha ha ha ha ha

*topshot blown into thousands of pieces.

*topshot out for the remainder of the thread

Lightsaber Lad
02-04-2004, 07:27 PM
LL is back and trying to get his Lightsaber back by the force and killing Hobbitguy so he stucks it in his troath and hes burned for 2 posts

02-04-2004, 10:20 PM
Originally posted by Glaive
*Glaive finds his head in quick time
ha ha ha topshot it'll take more than that to stop me.

*pulls out a thermal detonator /lol

*graps toshot and rams the detonator down this troat a runs behind a table.

Thats a spicy meata ball ha ha ha ha ha ha

*topshot blown into thousands of pieces.

*topshot out for the remainder of the thread

There are rules that were stated by myself and others before me. I suggest you follow them before somebody becomes pissed off and calls a mod in. I'm serious.

Darth Homer
02-05-2004, 12:08 AM
Yes, for the record, let me repost what rules I can remember.

1) If someone says you are down for X posts, you are down for X posts. There is no healing or potions or anything else to get you back up faster.

2) Once a person is down, they cannot be attacked & have more time down added on.

3) A person is considered down until they post again. After they repost, they are fair game.

4) Maximum number of posts to be down is 5. Generally accepted times are 2-3 posts. No one is allowed to permanently kill off someone else. (edit:however, it is perfectly legal to kill yourself off permanently)

5) You cannot take down the entire room. Generally, the max number of people allowed to take out in one post is 2.

6) Only posts that take a legal action in the fight count towards ressurection goals. (Ex: this post, Topshot's last, & Glaive's "find head" post do not count).

Please note, this IS a spam thread. I assume the mods & admins let it stay because it is fun for us & as long as it does not get out of hand & lead to flame wars, etc, there should be no problem. For any clarification of these rules, please pm myself, Kain, Topshot or anyone else that is a frequent poster in this thread.

*gets down off soap box*

Glaive v.1
02-05-2004, 06:45 AM
Soz guys. I never saw the rule post.

You will pay for your insulence.

*runs at topshot in a mad rage of bloodlust*

glaive and topshot enbrawled in a vicous duel (both out for 2 posts)

02-05-2004, 08:26 AM
*walks in just as Homer gives his rules speech*
Well said, ole chum! HAHA!!
*impales Homer on the Soul Reaver and leaves*

*Homer stands back up*
Homer: *******...

*fight continues*

02-05-2004, 09:51 AM
*Kain was clumbsy and trip on a bananna peel, slipped and fell into the pot of boiling hot water in the kictchen* :p

kain is boiling in the water and feels pain for 2 posts.

Lightsaber Lad
02-05-2004, 02:27 PM
so LL (me) was behind Crownest wen i use a forcepush to push him in the pot of hot boiling water Crow jumps out and i knock him right back in with my beloved New pink Lightsaber (pink?)
Crownest is hurt for 2 posts

02-05-2004, 06:18 PM
*Pie wakes up and sneaks up behind LL. He then sticks pointy can openers in LLs back*

Lightsaber Lad is beeing can-opened for 2 posts

Darth Homer
02-05-2004, 11:35 PM
*walks up to MMMPIE!!! & pricks him with the sword sticking out of my back (he said I was impaled, but not down...)*

MMMPIE!!! is slowly bleeding to death & out for 2 posts

02-06-2004, 12:56 AM
*Tosses into the kitchen a donut time-bomb, knowing Homer loves to eat donuts during a coffee break at the Springfield Power Plant.*

If Darth Homer eats the donut, he's gone for 2 posts.
If Crow eats it, he's gone for 2 posts as well.
If anyone picks it up and tries to feed it to topshot, they're out for 3 posts.

02-06-2004, 01:13 AM
Trows a thermal detonator into the bar and the tick of the fuse freezes every one then KABOOM everyon on the right side of the bar is out for 2 posts ohh ya and I get away in my speeder to hind for 1 post.

Darth Homer
02-06-2004, 01:46 AM
Originally posted by Whimseyboy
Trows a thermal detonator into the bar and the tick of the fuse freezes every one then KABOOM everyon on the right side of the bar is out for 2 posts ohh ya and I get away in my speeder to hind for 1 post.


We just went through this...please check the last page for the rules, you aren't allowed to take out lots of people at once.


*spies donut*


*eats it*

Hmm, not bad, the glycerin added a weird tang...wait, glycerin? D'OH!!!

Now down for 2 posts

Glaive v.1
02-06-2004, 06:47 AM
*sneaks up behind lightsabre lad and taps him on the shoulder*
*lightsabre lad turns round to meet a face full of pie*

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

lightsabre lad blinded by pie out for 1 post

02-06-2004, 10:18 AM
*Fires 1001 bullets at glaive and his body was full of holes*

Glaive is out for 2 postz. :cool:

Lightsaber Lad
02-06-2004, 08:33 PM
is not blinded anymore by tha pie and trying to get bavk MMPIE but gets lost in the kitchen i am lost in the kitchen for 3 posts

02-07-2004, 05:29 AM
Homer: Mmmmmm..... Forbidden dounut....... http://crownest.poonpipi.com/images/donut.gif

*trys to grab it*

*Presses deteonate button BOOM!!*

Homer is blasted for 2 posts.

02-07-2004, 06:46 AM
Sabretooth arrives!

Starts a lightsaber frenzy with is dualsabers


A rat (poor guy)
7 tables (lucky? not for them)
13 chairs (wouldn't have got killed if they were 12 or 14)
a crows nest

"A CROWS NEST" programming error. Actually a character, crow's nest is sabered for three posts.

02-07-2004, 09:36 AM
*as Whimseyboy is running, Kain appears before him*

Kain: My, my, my...someone has a bit of trouble reading? And now, Whimseyboy, it is time!

Whimseyboy: Time for what? To kill me? Thats your answer to everything! KILL!!


*impales Whimseyboy on the Soul Reaver and watches as the life leaves his body, then drops him dead on the floor*

Whimseyboy is dead for 5 posts

Edit: Dammit Crow, I thought you'd learned by now that you can't down someone until they post again. You just wasted a post...tsk, tsk, tsk...

Lightsaber Lad
02-07-2004, 12:18 PM
finaly out the kitchen i see the death rat i say crying i get you back for this sabretooth i get my lightsabre and trying to find sabretooth i see the tables i start crying again then i see sabretooth and i say you you mean Rat and tablekiller then starts to slaughter sabretooth then i put his legs in his noseholes

Sabretooth has his legs in his noseholes for 3 posts

Glaive v.1
02-09-2004, 09:31 AM
*sees kain and charges at him with the BLADE OF CARNAGE.

*slices and dices kain

*sweeps kain into the corner of cantina

Kain trying to pull himself together. Out for 3 posts

02-09-2004, 06:42 PM
*spots Glaive swinging his sword*

Glaive is spotted (not out) for 1 post

Glaive v.1
02-09-2004, 08:50 PM
*spots MMMPIE!!! looking at me

*runs at MMMPIE!!! swinging sword madly

*grabs MMMPIE!!!'s hand and begins to shake.

engaged in freindly conversation both out for 1 post

02-10-2004, 09:19 AM
Sabretooth arrives
Seeks Lightsaber Lad
Finds Lightsaber Lad
Throws Lightsabre(tooth) at LL
Attack Misses and hits Glaive
LL laughes damn loudly and is still laughing

Glaive is sabered for 2 posts.
LL is in a laughing frenzy for 1 post.

02-10-2004, 10:21 AM
*Summons sharp blades to slice n' dice sabretooth to bits*

sharp blades + sabretooth = out for 2 posts :cool:

Lightsaber Lad
02-10-2004, 06:53 PM
So that was funny stopped laughing and asked Sabretooth how do you get your legs out of your nose then Darth Homer arrives and begins a story Darth Homer and Me are both out for 1 post

Glaive v.1
02-10-2004, 07:05 PM
*spots lightsabre lad. Using BLADE OF CARNAGE slices him into tine tiny pieces.
*collects LL's remains onto a plate. Sits down at a table adds salt
and pepper to taste and begins to eat LL.

LL is busy being eaten out for 2 posts
Glaive busy eating out for 1 post

02-11-2004, 12:10 PM
Sabretooth arrives (with sharp blades)
Looks around
Takes and sit and starts sipping vodka at the bar

Sabretooth and the bartender are busy drinking vodka and chatting for 2 posts.
p.s. the bartender is busy, no asking for drinks or 2 posts.

02-11-2004, 12:26 PM
*sabretooth finds himself standing under a garbage crushing machine in the bar*

Me: Oh what does this button do?

*pushes button, SQUASH!*

Opps sorry didnt see you there.

sabretooth is crushed for 2 posts.

02-11-2004, 04:55 PM
*Is done chatting with Glaive and walks up to Crow.
After a light shove Crow joins sabretooth in the garbage crushing machine.*

Crow is out for 2 posts

Glaive v.1
02-11-2004, 05:15 PM
*graps MMMPIE!!! and throws him across da bar*
*sits in a dark corner and takes a back seat to the fight.

MMMPIE!! out for 2 posts
Glaive out for as many posts as i can be bothered

02-12-2004, 10:11 AM
sabretooth arrives with bent blades
knows that he is the only one who can post
knows that crow is gonna thrash him when crow gets out
sabretooth bites his jaw with the sabretooths and gets new excuse for going to the hospital
sabretooth scrams!

Sabretooth is in the hospital and receiving medical treatment for 3 posts.

Lightsaber Lad
02-13-2004, 06:12 PM
well eeeerrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmmmm LL dont like it that everyone is hurt so he is feeling lonely then he thinks i join them and sticks his Lightsaber in his one nose

LL i busy eating out of its nose with pain
Crow has a hearth attack of the laughing and is down for 0 posts

02-13-2004, 06:26 PM
*Looks at LL.*

Hmph! Pathetic human.......

*Grips and tosses LL into the garbage compactor nearest him.*

Lightsaber Lad is crushed for 3 posts.

Darth Homer
02-14-2004, 06:52 AM
*puts on headphones & starts listening to Rob Zombie, forgetting that he sometimes lashes out with the force when distracted*


*Topshot slams into the back of a force-Dragula*


*Topshot slams into the back of a force-Dragula again*

Topshot is down for 2 posts

Do it BAY-BAH! Do it BAY-BAH!

*wanders off, still singing*

02-14-2004, 08:10 AM
*sits down and kicks feet onto a table to watch the mayhem*

Tsk tsk...so messy...

*if anyone attacks Kain, Kain counters and puts them down for 5 posts, so ha!*

02-14-2004, 02:02 PM
*Attacks Kain*

(i'm down for 5 posts)

02-15-2004, 04:38 AM
Sabretooth arrives
Sees Kain laughing his head off
A pie is slithering away
Sabretooth ignites his lightsabretooth
Attacks Kain and chops his head off

Kain is looking for his head for 3 posts.

Darth Homer
02-15-2004, 07:11 AM
*walks past Sabertooth, still listening to his music, this time Peter Gabriel*


*Sabertooth is hit by a large force-Sledgehammer*

Sabertooth is down for 3 posts

02-15-2004, 08:04 AM
*infects homer's PC with a "IAmDoomed4EverAndEver" virus and he cant turn on his PC*

Homer is stuck without a PC and is locked outside the bar for 2 posts.

Glaive v.1
02-15-2004, 09:54 AM
*sees crows nest infecting homers pc.

*graps a themal detonator and disguises it as a meat ball adds some spagetti and offers it to crows nest

*corws nest with now questions ask

*glaive(me) runs away and hides behind a table.

*5...4...3...2...1....... crows nest explodes all over the walls.

*no one else harmed

Thats a spicy meat ball

ha ha ha ha ha

corws nest out for 3 posts

02-15-2004, 10:52 AM
Originally posted by sabretooth
Sabretooth arrives
Sees Kain laughing his head off
A pie is slithering away
Sabretooth ignites his lightsabretooth
Attacks Kain and chops his head off

Kain is looking for his head for 3 posts.

*sabretooth didin't read apparently, so as he comes up on Kain, Kain kills him for 5 posts*

02-15-2004, 12:56 PM
*Pie runs over to glaive and kicks him in the nuts*

[Glaive is dancing the nutcracker for 3 posts]

Darth Homer
02-16-2004, 12:54 AM
*joins Glaive in dancing the nutcracker*

Dumpa-dumpa-dumpa HEY!

*kicks MMMPIE!!! squa in de nutz*

MMMPIE!!! is also dancing the nutcracker for 2 posts

02-16-2004, 01:12 AM
*Seriously owes Homer for that double force-dragula, takes out a Garth Brooks cd, and silently switches Homer's "tunes" to good ol' country music.*

That'll teach 'im. Bwahahahahaha. :evil2:

Homer listens to Garth Brooks' "Honky-Tonk Bar Association" for 3 posts straight.

Darth Homer
02-16-2004, 02:06 AM

Darth Rythe
02-16-2004, 02:46 AM
*sticks corks in his ears, walks away.*

Darth Homer
02-16-2004, 08:12 PM
He's already down, he has to post again before he is considered up...

02-17-2004, 09:13 AM
Sabretooth arrives!
Looks at some penguin with bleeding ears
Seeks revenge upon the one who bled the poor penguins ears
Challenges topshot to a sabreduel
when duelling, sabretooth tosss topshot over to Kain
Kain is scratched by the sabre

What happens to topshot next?
Kain is the judge of that.

02-17-2004, 09:26 AM
*Heats up bullet with hot fire and shoots at sabretooth*

*Bullet is so hot and powerful that sabretooth started sweating and melts*

sabretooth is transformed to liquid for 2 posts.

Glaive v.1
02-17-2004, 01:22 PM
*attacks darth homer w/ his blade of carnage.

feel da wrath of my mighty weapon.

darth out for 1 post

02-17-2004, 09:10 PM
Originally posted by Glaive
*attacks darth homer w/ his blade of carnage.

feel da wrath of my mighty weapon.
Uh, uh, uh.
darth out for 1 post

I already got 'im for 3 posts.

He's already down, he has to post again before he is considered up...

And that means after his limit is up , so yours doesn't count.
Don't worry, Rythe's didn't count, either....


*Accepts Sabretooth's challenge and chops 'im in 2. Feeds his lower torso and legs to the piranhas.*

Sabretooth's trying to re-assemble his body and must wait for 2 posts.

Darth Homer
02-18-2004, 04:53 AM
Yes, please go back a few pages and review the rules, the ones that apply here are:
*A person is considered down until the make their next legal post
*A legal post is one that takes an action in the game

So, actually, Topshot, Darth Rythe's last post does count, it is a legal action just done to himself. However, my previous post & this post do not count as I have not made a legal action in either.

Have a nice day :)

edit: And let's get some real imagination in these posts! Saber duels, shootings, & claws have all been done...I know you guys want to let loose with something interesting like rabid raccoons or giant ostriches...let's make this game fun!

Darth Homer
02-18-2004, 05:07 AM
*looks around the room, spies Topshot*

HA! I have found you again! Prepare for a battle the likes of which have rarely been seen before!!

Homer & Topshot are engaging in an uninterruptible JENGA game for the next 4 posts

Glaive v.1
02-19-2004, 07:08 AM
*attacks crows nest with a pack of monkey ninja trained in the ancient art of monkey kung fu

attack my monkey minions
ha ha ha ha ha (evil laugh) :evil3:

crow getting his ass whiped by monkey ninjas for 3 posts

02-20-2004, 09:16 PM
*Hears the country music and starts dancing a funky dance*
"Yeah, play that thing funky monkey!"
*Gets weird looks*
*Is shot by 3 shotguns at once*

I'm dead for 3 posts

Glaive v.1
02-22-2004, 11:35 AM
is there no body who can post.

*glaive sits down and begins to plot his plans for world domination with a squrriel.

out plotting for 3 posts

02-22-2004, 02:39 PM
Glaive, how can you mix Matrix sayings and Predator numericals? It just seems a bit...odd.
(this does not count for recoveries, niether will Glaive's response unless he takes an action)

Glaive v.1
02-22-2004, 05:03 PM
Originally posted by Kain
Glaive, how can you mix Matrix sayings and Predator numericals? It just seems a bit...odd.
(this does not count for recoveries, niether will Glaive's response unless he takes an action)

well i used the Gimp to create it but know as you can see i found a better way to do the coding.

(doesn't count towards respawns)

02-23-2004, 08:46 AM
*Turns Glaive into ash with meh ray gun*

Glavie's ashes are blown away for 3 posts. :cool:

Lightsaber Lad
02-23-2004, 06:50 PM
takes topshot out with a cute little funny looking rabbit who me uses as baseball bat

topshot sees rabbits flying before his eyes for 3 posts
i am bitten for 0 posts hahahahahahahahhahahah

02-23-2004, 07:17 PM
No Crow, because he was still awaiting respawn. And Glaive you missed the point of my question. You mixed 2 scifi movies. Its just wierd.


Darth Homer
02-24-2004, 10:32 PM
ok, lightsaber, there have been only 3 legal posts since my & Topshot's Jenga game started, so we are not out of it yet & he cannot be touched until he posts again. Sorry, I know with all of the non-counting posts it's a little hard to keep track, last legal post was Glaive's Squirrel-based World-Domination scheming

02-24-2004, 11:11 PM
*impales Lightsaber Lad on a javelin and throws him an incredible 700 yds, winning the gold medal for Nosgoth*

Lightsaber Lad is flat out dead for 2 posts*

02-25-2004, 12:20 PM
*Kicks kain's butt with a hockey stick all the way to africa*

kain is out for 2 posts.

Darth Homer
02-25-2004, 06:51 PM
*uses the force to squeeze Crow down to Hockey puck size, then forms a Jedi vs Sith Hockey game*

You do not realize the power of the dark side slapshot!!

*game starts, Crow is used for the puck*

*game ends in a 2-2 tie, with 2 sith and 3 jedi killed during the game*

Crow is out for 3 posts

02-25-2004, 08:53 PM
Prepare for a battle, the likes of which have never been witnessed before.

Topshot and Darth Homer begin playing an uninterruptable 1-on-1 match of HORSE for an equal 4 posts.

Lightsaber Lad
02-26-2004, 07:54 AM
stand up and trying to get back to the bar i am trying to get back to the bar for 4 posts (i keep tripping over my big smelly hanging in the middle Lightsaber)

Darth Homer
02-27-2004, 12:13 AM
May I say, EW!

Ok, Top, I believe it was H-O to H-O-R and your shot!

(does not count at all towards anything and is really a fairly poor excuse for a post)

Glaive v.1
03-02-2004, 12:36 PM
this doesn't count twards any posts ,but i've become confussed :confused:.

Who's in an who's out i cna't really tell now.

03-04-2004, 09:49 PM
Everyone is awake now, just to end any confusion.

03-05-2004, 12:57 AM
ok, *slice*
shoves an extremely long sword of pain into Kain,
*down 1 post *
((im kinda new 2 the cantina,So can any of u guys tell me if i do anyting wrong?thx))

03-05-2004, 12:59 AM
First, talk about who you're attacking, then say how many posts they are down for, on a scale from 1 to 5. And you can't kill everyone in a single post. If you scroll back a few pages, I posted the rules.

03-05-2004, 05:40 AM
*Returns to the bar and starts shooting milk and throwing eggs at kain*

Kain is milked and egged for 2 posts.

03-05-2004, 05:52 AM
Takes a scorching hot piece of earwax and inserts it in crow nest's ear!

Crow's Nest is hollering and waving for 2 posts.

Darth Homer
03-05-2004, 06:27 AM
*waves back at Crow*

Hi!! How ya doing?

*walks to bar*

*orders ale, spies jukebox in the corner*

Hmm, I think I'll play a song...

*goes to jukebox and flips through pages*

Hmmm, no....hate Rod Stewart...ooh, The Darkness, that's a good one, what else is there? "Beat Sabertooth with a 2x4"? Never heard that...

*pushes button, Sabertooth is whacked with a 2x4*

Hmm, doesn't seem to be working...

*presses button several times, Sabertooth is hit with the 2x4 several more times*

Oh well, The Darkness it is..."I Believe in a Thing Called love", excellent!

*pushes button & music starts, goes back to bar & drinks ale*

Sabertooth is down for 2 posts

Glaive v.1
03-05-2004, 07:05 AM
*picks up a wet kipper*

*begins to slap homer round the face with kipper vigerously*

homer dazed and confused for 1 post

03-05-2004, 10:00 PM
Revan throws Barnuts heated to 400 degrees into Glaives face, melting the flesh
down 2 posts

03-05-2004, 11:26 PM
*Gags Revan with a shoe string and pours ammonia down his throat.*

Revan is having convulsions (or whatever effect ammonia has) for 2 posts.

Darth Homer
03-05-2004, 11:52 PM
*picks up Topshot & dunks him through the basketball hoop*

Topshot is caught in the nylon for 1 post

03-06-2004, 03:50 AM
*Plants a bomb under homer's car, when he tries to start the engine he ended up flying instead*

homer = out for 2 postz

03-06-2004, 05:02 AM
Arrives with a rubber microphone and hits crow.

No Effect.

Attacks with a sharp edged, teethed, and explosive microphone!


Da crow's nest slashed, cut and boomed for 3 posts.

03-06-2004, 06:17 AM
ALL OF U ARE FOOLS *2cool appears from a dark corner in the bar* now my old master DARTH ZAIUS shall be avenged!!!

2cool pulls out a large stick of dynamite and ignites it
the whole bar is vaporised.(including 2cool) muahamuaha~!:bdroid2:

03-06-2004, 02:47 PM
Well that was dumb as hell, i mean, y did you just do that?
u didnt even say how many posts we got!
lets pretend that never happend

Revan bitchslaps 2cool, knocking him dead cold for 7000 posts
((thats serious))

Revan whips out a long firey board with rusty barbed wire sticking out the end of it.
he smacks sabre-tooth in the back of the head with it, rippin his skull out!
Has no skull for 2 posts

Darth Homer
03-07-2004, 12:06 AM
Originally posted by the_lord_Revan
Well that was dumb as hell, i mean, y did you just do that?
u didnt even say how many posts we got!
lets pretend that never happend

Actually, we don't have to pretend, it is against the rules & therefore is ignored.

Originally posted by the_lord_Revan
Revan bitchslaps 2cool, knocking him dead cold for 7000 posts
((thats serious))

Unfortuneatly, that is also against the rules (too many posts). But, seeing as he didn't make a legal post anyway, it wouldn't count if it was legal. If you have questions, go back in the thread a few pages & rules posted by myself or Kain should be there. Learn them, know them, love them.

*this post doesn't count*

Edit: I created a new thread w/ the current set of rules in it for quick access. Please see it for clarification.

03-07-2004, 01:18 AM
Well...I get that! What i was saying was he diddnt post that!
but the rest of my post was meant

Darth Homer
03-07-2004, 01:26 AM
oh, ok, I think I understand now

It was a good excuse for the rules thread anyway :D

*pulls micro-sized time machine out of his pocket, sets it, & clips it to Revan's belt*


*a portal opens & Revan is sucked through*

Revan is lost in time for 3 posts

03-07-2004, 01:31 AM
*Gives Homer a slap-kick combo right in the face.*

Homer's nose is cracked and bleeding for 3 posts.

03-07-2004, 01:57 AM
*looks around*
*a scorching hot, coal-filled ice cream truck hits topshot*

Topshot is slammed for 3 posts.

03-07-2004, 05:16 AM
*Runs my car and 100000 pound tank over sabretooth*

sabretooth is paralyzed for 3 posts :cool:

03-07-2004, 11:11 PM
slams crows nest through a glass window, than rips his head off

Then rips homers leg off and beats him silly with it

Crows nest headless 4 posts
homer legless 3 posts

Glaive v.1
03-08-2004, 06:54 AM
* attacks the_lord_Revan with his mighty Barbarian Kick of the Terrors*

Glaive v.1 goes all Kung Fu

the_lord_Revan out for 2 posts

03-09-2004, 01:05 AM
thank god, I was in here looking for him; he nearly killed me.

*surveys mess*

Just no one pick on me and the world will go around as it should.

03-09-2004, 03:57 AM
Takes an electric cord and wraps it around Glaive.
Switches on power.

Glaive is being electrocuted and wrapped up for 3 posts.

03-09-2004, 04:14 AM
*Absent minded sabretooth found himself stuck on wet cement that i planted*

**Cement then suddenly turns into quick drying quick sand!**

Sabretooth is burried under th sand for 3 posts. :cool:

03-09-2004, 01:06 PM
*takes out his frustration over being ****ed out of 4 hours of work because his ****ing ride won't answer their ****ing phone out on Crow*

*everybody is in awe at the disguiting acts of brutality carried out on poor Crow*

*anyone who attacks Kain is met with the same punishment*

Crow_Nest is smashed, bashed, burned, gutted, impaled, and flat out dead for 5 posts

Darth Homer
03-09-2004, 07:26 PM
Ok, few problems with the last couple of posts

starting with Revan's last

I'm already down & cannot have more posts added onto my count or be attacked until I post again

Then, Crow, you posted after 3 posts, but if you look, you were down for 4

because of that, Kain, your post is not legal either, sorry

I have reposted the rules in a seperate thread so that it is easier to find & review them, it is out there, called "Bar Fight Rules." If you have questions, please see it first. I'm tired of refereeing here, this is the last time I'm gonna do it. We now have a new spam thread in the Stupid QA. This thread is all but dead. If you want it to continue, stick to the rules, otherwise I'm sure Lynk will be more than happy to kill it.

03-09-2004, 08:36 PM
Aww geezus, people. The rules have been posted a god-awful amount of times. DAMN NOOBIES(revan, that is)

03-09-2004, 10:35 PM
((quite frankly Kain, blow me, AND as homer saw from my pm 2 him, I DID look at the rulez, i just didn't look at the one saying that he was down UNTIL AFTER I had posted, so.....Just to say, KAIN your gonna get your *** whipped, got me?))
Revan whips out a Hellish Chainsaw of Doom and dismembers Kain, then gets a flaming stick with rusty barbed wire around it into Kains stomach.

Kain is Impaled, bleeding and dismembered for 8 posts, and anybody who calls me a newbie will suffer the same consequences. got me?

((Told ya Kain))

03-10-2004, 12:29 AM

*Surprises Revan by slamming his backside into a wall of spikes.*

Revan remains stuck in the Pungy Pit (or whatever skaters call them) for 3 posts.

03-10-2004, 03:46 AM
Picks up Topshot and throws him into a closet.
Puts a 4 foot-high crazy cat with him.
Closes the door

Topshot is being used as a scratching post for 2 posts.

03-10-2004, 10:51 AM
*Invents a punching machine and punches sabretooth until he dies*

Sabretooth is dead for 2 posts.

Glaive v.1
03-11-2004, 08:39 PM
*using mystical powers of shassuco transports crow to the mystical realm of unnamed flames*

shasso susso walla walla ko ko

*crow in a realm where squirrels run free and birds are as big as trees*


crow lost in the imagination of glaive, out for 5 posts (thats the max number of posts isn't it)

03-12-2004, 12:26 AM
Revan runs over and smashes Glaives head into a barstool, than opens up a can of wupass on him with ultra-triple-smash-vertical-ass smashing kick on him, rupturin his colon.

Glaive has bloody stool for 3 posts.
((Crap if you dont know it!))

03-12-2004, 02:33 AM
Actually, revan, you ARE a noobie. 8 posts isn't within the rules. For someone who plays games (You say you're a jock), you sure do have a bit of difficulty following rules. And as for the intimidating over the internet, I don't know who you talk to online, but they must not have much common sense if you're little bully-online tactics worked, and I won't be intimidated by you or anyone who thinks that its cool to threaten people they don't even know. I put up with it my freshman year in highschool and I almost put that jackass jock in the hospital, so YOU can BLOW ME. And the last person to call me a geek for playing D&D also got beaten, so you're stereotypes are what make you a geek.


*beats the noobie jock revan to within an inch of his life*

*revan is on the ground crying and dying for 5 posts*

03-12-2004, 03:41 AM
*Picks up Rocket Launcher*
*Shoots it at Kain*
Oops! No rockets!
Takes a pie and smashes it at Kain

Kain is feeling insulted for 2 posts.
Sabretooth is off to get some rockets for 1 post.

BTW, if it so that whoever attacks Kain gets out for 5 posts, it's not fair! Kain will be invincible and that is outta the rules.

03-12-2004, 09:44 AM
Originally posted by sabretooth

BTW, if it so that whoever attacks Kain gets out for 5 posts, it's not fair! Kain will be invincible and that is outta the rules.

lol, I was just pissed at the time. Sorry about that:D

[this does not count toward awakenings, lets try not to flood this up with these again, eh fellas?]

03-12-2004, 06:07 PM
*walks into bar filled with absolute carnage*
So this is what you crazies are doin in here?
Well may as well sit down and have a beer
*orders beer and sits on barstool, proceeds to get a little too sloshed*

Glaive v.1
03-12-2004, 07:01 PM
*sees DarksideDjembe slosed*
*walks over and begins to chat to DarksideDjembe*


*starts sword fight*
*chops darkside arm off*
Ha i win
darkside-no you haven't
yes i have i chopped your arm off
darkside-its just a flesh wound i've had worse
*glaive continues to remove limps from darkside*
darkside- ok we'll call it a draw then
*glaive walks off*
darkside-ohh running away eh come back here you coward i'll bit your legs off.

darkside without limps for 2 posts

03-12-2004, 09:22 PM
(Monty Pithon Eh?)

swgbking walks in the bar, and notices the bloodstained walls. He walks over to the bar, and pushes Darkside of a bar stool, and then sits on it.
"What a slaughter house, what fun"
He grabs one of Darside's limbs and throws it at Glaive as he is walking away, knocking him over for 1 post.

03-12-2004, 10:52 PM
o is that so kain? if its so illegal than yd u still stay out for 8+ posts? kinda dumb there man. and you actually thought i was talkin about u when i made my sig? nope! and i'm actually 27, and bench 279 lbs. so back off, I could kick your ass anyday.((I've just about ripped a guys arm off the last time i got in an actual fight, so im serious about not messing with me)) no offense,
truce?oh and i wasn't calling you a geek, nerd, handbasher, meat packer or anything like that, so i was just sayin sh*t in my sig, so dont worry bout that!
((at least it would end our fighting!!*in real life anyway, not the fight*))

"hmm.... arm ripped off eh? ive got something that'll fix that!" Whips out a bar stool and beats swgbking sensless. then shoves his hand down throat, placing a few things in there and ripping his trachea out
swbking is babling sensless for 2 posts and Kain is unable to speak and chokes on his own vomit for 3 posts
((c? i didnt keep u from talkin in retaliation, otherwise it woulda been 5 posts!))

03-13-2004, 02:19 AM
Actually, revan, I stayed out for howmanyeverposts because I don't come here day after day after day checking to see whos on who and whats going where, so nyeh on you.

And I don't care how much you can bench or if you THINK you can kick my ass, cuz we'll never know, so nyeh again.

[this post does not count toward awakenings]

03-13-2004, 05:47 AM
*Kain was resting on his bed and i shot a fire arrow at him*

*kain caught fire and started running and screaming like a sissy girl*

KAin is burning for 3 posts.

03-13-2004, 05:57 AM


*brings down the artifical mod console and kills Crow*

Crow is DEAD until Homer, Topshot, or I decide he ISN'T

The last legal post toward downtime was revan's.

03-13-2004, 01:13 PM
((hey Kain, wanna call a truce? this inssesant war has gotta be getting annoyin to you, cuz it is with me! truce? oh, and isnt your last post illegal too? i was just wondering....))

Lynk Former
03-13-2004, 01:31 PM
.................................................. .......... :dozey: .... you know what this whole thing has gone on for long enough and it's become as repetative as a poorly designed videogame... call a truce? let's call a total cease fire in here, clean up the bar, repair all the broke chairs, clean up the blood, and collection all the missing teeth that belong to various people, and head on home so you can all get some sleep and sober up and hopefully find a better use for your time because obviously some of you need to find a healthier hobby... :dozey:

thread closed. have a nice day. don't bother argueing with it, it's done, no way to get it back open.