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whitedragon
04-16-2003, 05:19 PM
sence this is my post im going to call myself a jackass


the adventures of white dragon (in the real world) episode 2: a bad day to be a dragon (inspierd by the panda cronicals)

*our story opens in a roman arena where we see two gladiators fighting. suddenly a gigantic shadow appears and a gigantic foot crushes a gladiator*

optimus prime: come on ian we need your help

*the other gladiator takes off his helmit and shows himself to be ian*

ian: optimus prime? but i thought this was gladiator?

optimus prime: never mind that right now the autobots need you

ian: well ok whatever

*optimus prime and ian fly off across the earth toward a grassy plain*

ian: uh prime so who are we fighting

cell: MWUHAHAHAHA so they bring another fighter to defeat me but even he cannot stand agenct my perfect form.

ian: oooooh boy

ash: dont worry will help right pikachu

pikachu: no you little punk

harry potter: i can beat him in quidditch

morpheus: you are the one ian

vader: if you only knew the power of the darkside

john kimple: IM A COP YOU IDIOT!!!

big gay al: IM SUPER!

ian:......................

carrot top: you can dial down the center with 1800-CALL-ATT

ian: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

*ian wakes up*

ian: i have got to stop eating those bean burittos so late at night

*in a internet cafe not to far away a spookey character is writeing a very disterbing message on the net*

spookey character: 1 4M @M l33T hAx0R AnD 1 WiLL R0X0R j00 N0O85 1 @m TH3 mOS+ 4W@$OmESt 4w5OME mR. 4w5Om3 Who eV3R @W5Om3D The NE+

*ian walks in and walks over to the guy*

ian: HI!!!

spookey character: I DIDENT DO IT

ian: riiiiiight

spookey character: you really shouldent sneek up on people like that

*after an hour or two ian gets back home only to find that his house has been broken into*

ian: SHOW YOURSELFS FIENDS

special agent baiter: hello mr. ian my name is special agent baiter. im with the FBI

ian: baiter!? your name is baiter???

special agent baiter: yes it is

ian: do you fish

special agent baiter: yes i do

ian: are you any good at it?

special agent baiter: yes i am a master at fishing

ian: *trying to hold back laughter* so i could call you master ba_ naw its much to easy a set up

special agent baiter: i think that you should come with me

ian: what did i do

special agent baiter: about two hours ago in a local internet cafe a man was posting l33t all over the net and after an hour or so
the cafe blew up like KA BOOM CRASH SMASH BANG BIFF BAM WHAM....*ehem* anyway we suspect it was you sence you hold
the last leet speak generator in the world.

ian: in other words i was the only person who downloaded it

special agent baiter: your comeing with me mister

ian: it wasent me! it was the two armed man

special agent baiter: HA likely story like theres really some two armed man walking around here. your under arrest dirtbag!

ian: WHAT ON EARTH IS THAT THING BEHIND YOU!!!

special agent baiter: what where!

ian: yoink

*ian runs away*

special agent baiter: i dont see anything where is it.....

*ian runs to a local 7-11 and stops outside of it to catch his breath*

ian: damn master ba_

jay: yo man what you doing on our turf

silent bob:....

jay: shut up fatty hes not just passing by hes tryin to steal our spot

ian: hey arent you guys...naaa you couldent be

silent bob:....

ian: nice to meet you silent bob im ian but im know as white dragon on the internet

jay: dude what the hell is the internet

silent bob:....

jay: oh yeah that thing. so ian my man what brings you to our humble domain

ian: running from the FBI

silent bob:....

jay: i hear you silent bob those FBI jerks can be a real pain in the ass sometimes.

silent bob:....

ian: well snootch to the nooch guys

silent bob:....

jay: snoogans

*meanwhile not more than a swallows flight away*

special agent baiter: i still dont see anything...wait a minut. i think ive been duped

*ian goes into a small diner not to far away. he sits down and thinks about what to do next
but dimises that when he sees that they serve corn beef hash*

waitress: can i take your order

ian: BRING ON THE BEEF!!!

*ian sees that the tv is on*

news caster: in todays top story a mad bomber blew up an internet cafe today for no apparent reason. the bomber is identafied as, first name ian. last name unknown.

ian: hey thats me. awsome! im on the tv!

*special agent baiters voice comes on a loud speaker*

special agent baiter: ian we know your in there. come out with your hands up.

ian: (come on ian think. think! what am i gonna do...i wonder what im going to have for dinner tonite? that macaroni is just going to go bad if i dont cook it.)

special agent baiter: ian are you even listening to me

*ian looks around and sees a man with a cowboy hat on*

ian: sir could i barrow that hat

man with hat: what do i get in return

ian: how about a nickel

man with hat: you got yerself a deal buddy

*ian walks out the diner with the hat on*

ian: dont shoot im just a guy with a cowboy hat trying to get out of the line of fire

special agent baiter: ok just hurry up and go

cop 1: uh sir thats the bomber

special agent baiter: no its not

cop 1: yes it is. you can see his face plain as day

special agent baiter: well let me tell you something mr. smartypants. i know for a fact that ian does not ware cowboy hats...i just let him get away dident i

*cops start shooting at ian as he runs down a drain pipe and then goes down the huge pipe untill he gets to the end where the water is draining out over a water fall
"you know like in the fugitive. duh"*

special agent baiter: end of the line ian. just give up

ian: im telling you it was the two armed man

special agent baiter: i wont listen to any more lies. your comeing with me

ian: NEVER!!!

*ian jumps*

special agent baiter: NO! DONT DO IT!!!

ian: ow

*special agent baiter looks down and sees that ian only fell five feet into a two inch pool of water*

special agent baiter: ooooh hes good

*meanwhile*

spookey character: MWUHAHAHAHAHA everything is proceeding according to plan...i really need a life

*we find ian running around a big city...wait there are no big citys in hillsborough north carolina*

ian: man i really need a some money

*he sees an old lady with a cane and picks up a baseball bat and walks over to her*

ian: well it worked in grand theft auto

*just as he is about to swing the bat she turns around and hits him with her cane*

ian: ouch! that never happend in grand theft auto 3

old lady: oh yeah well this never happend eather

*old lady pulls out a gun and starts shooting*

old lady: YOUR LUCKEY I FORGOT MY GLASSES TODAY YOU LITTLE PUNK!!!!

*inside FBI headquarters*

special agent baiter: ian got away again

the chief: yes you let him get away

special agent baiter: hey chief you want to hear me tell a joke...knock knock ( from catch me if you can)

*the phone rings*

special agent baiter: hello

little girl: you will die in 7 days (from the ring)

special agent baiter: sorry wrong number

little girl: oh excuse me. sorry

special agent baiter: its no problem. bye

*phone rings again*

ian: hello special agent baiter this is ian.

special agent baiter: ian? where are you

ian: oh well im...wait your trying to trick me

cop 1: uh sir weve traced his call. hes somewhere in the building.

*all the agents turn around and see ian sitting in a chair a few feet away from them talking on a cell phone. ian had on a really terrible fake handlebar mustash*

special agent baiter: uh ian

ian: i am not ian i am snidley whiplash (insert stupid 1920's badguy cartoon laugh here)

special agent baiter: ok sorry about that

*ian runs away*

ian: yoink

cop 1: uh sir that was the bomber

special agent baiter: im getting really tierd of your smartass attitude...that was him wasent it

*the agents follow ian to another internet cafe*

special agent baiter: the game is up ian. surrender!

ian: wait theres the two armed man right there

spookey character: DUUUUDE how did you find me out

ian: oh no

special agent baiter: my god its him

dell dude: DUUUUDE your getting a dell

ian: i thought you were arrested

dell dude: DUUUUDE i escaped

special agent baiter: so it was you who blew up the cafe

dell dude: DUUUUDE i dident blow it up

special agent baiter: it says right here that you there was a "mad bombing"

cop 1: i think it was supposed to say "mad spamming"

ian: must be a typo

dell dude: DUUUUDE thats alot of typos

ian: ok that dude thing is getting annoying

dell dude: DUUUUDE

special agent baiter: ok mr. dell dude im takeing you in

dell dude: DUUUUDE your going to have to catch me

ian: start the cool chaceing music

*scooby doo shows up and turns on some stupid 60's music, but then gets stragled by ian*

dell dude: DUUUUDE im getting out of here without music

*ian and special agent baiter run after the dell dude*

special agent baiter: i wish i had my car

ian: i wish i had my mp3 player. wait i have an idea

*ian throws a red and white ball on the ground*

special agent baiter: wow great idea. throwing a ball on the ground is really working well

ian: CHARIZARD I CHOOSE YOU

special agent baiter: dont tell me thats what i think it is

*that really big dinosaur/dragon thingy comes out in a flash of light*

special agent baiter: what in the_

ian: lets go charizard

charizard: yeah yeah yeah.

*ian jumps on the big dinosaur/dragon thingys back and they fly towards the dell dude*

dell dude: DUUUUDE what the heck is that thing

ian: charizard uh tackel attack. no wait...uh fire spin..no uh flame thrower, NO wait uh

charizard: how about i just beat the living hell out of him

ian: that works for me

*the big dinosaur/dragon thingy thus beats the living hell out of the dell dude. what a day*

dell dude: d-dd-duuude this sucks

ian: charizard return

charizard: NO I DONT WANT TO GO BACK IN THE BALL

ian: ok then bugger off

special agent baiter: nice job ian. you almost killed the dell dude. you would make a nice agent

ian: thanks but i dont really do things that the FBI would like

special agent baiter: oh well see you later

ian: or mabey sooner

special agent baiter: lets hope not

ian: dumbass

special agent baiter: jerk

*meanwhile somewhere in minasota*

dragonslayer: the dell dude did not complete his task. when he gets out of prison he is to be executed MWUHAHAHAHAHA

*dragonslayers door is broken in*

chinese food dilivery guy: oh so you here dis time. i thought i just break in door with crowbar like last time

dragonslayer: uh thanks just put the food there on the table

chinese food dilivery guy: water your plants they look like crap



THE END...OR IS IT...actually it isent...ill shut up

Rad707_Pandaz
04-19-2003, 01:32 AM
Wtf...dude, like...wtf?! Er...I'm getting this weird conspiratorial feeling that you're not telling me something...

Um...crap..nevermind.

Rad707_Pandaz
04-19-2003, 02:53 AM
Okay, man...I didn't want to do this...I'm lying...but Pandawan really wanted me to tell you this...okay that part's true.

We're getting this feeling that you Ripped Off parts of the Panda Chronicles, man!!!

Most of it is original...but some aspects REALLY stand out that make me say, "Wait a sec, isn't that from Ep.4 or 2?Wtf?!".
Should I at least get some credit?

whitedragon
04-19-2003, 11:18 AM
Originally posted by Rad707_Pandaz
Okay, man...I didn't want to do this...I'm lying...but Pandawan really wanted me to tell you this...okay that part's true.

We're getting this feeling that you Ripped Off parts of the Panda Chronicles, man!!!

Most of it is original...but some aspects REALLY stand out that make me say, "Wait a sec, isn't that from Ep.4 or 2?Wtf?!".
Should I at least get some credit?

:eek: oh man im so sorry about that. i know i got the fugitive idea from the panda cronicals but i dident know it looked like it was a rip off. ill change it if you want. im at least going to say something about the panda cronicals in there.

other than plageriseing you guys storys (which i feel really bad about) how did you like it over all. because i have some movie parodys that you mite like (which i made before i saw the panda cronicals)

Rad707_Pandaz
04-22-2003, 02:32 AM
As long as you give some credit, we're cool, man.

I read some of those movie parodies. They were pretty good. I heard you were working on a Matrix parody. Let me know when you get done with that.

I'm currently working on The Panda Chronicles: Episode 7: Rise of the Pandas. Some japenese dudes are playing JK3 and are calling themselves the Pandarens, and you know how the japenese are. They don't like Americans.

I'm also working on The Panda Chronicles: Spinoff #2. It's really just something for the fans of the Invisible Man TV show.

I'm just going to step into oncoming traffic...I'll be right back.

CRASH!!!...my nuts!!!

whitedragon
04-22-2003, 02:42 AM
episode 7 that sounds awsome i cant wait. and im now currently done with 50% of the matrix parody. so it shouldent be long (sence i finally have some free time i can work on it) traffic sounds pretty fun WAIT FOR ME!! :p

topshot
04-26-2003, 07:29 PM
Holy ****!!!!

*Drops to the floor and starts laughing his ass off.*


This is probably the best one I've read so far. You've gotta tell me how you come up with these wacky stories, dragon! :D:D:D:D

Seriously, this one is pure, solid gold! :cool:

whitedragon
04-26-2003, 11:47 PM
Originally posted by topshot
Holy ****!!!!

*Drops to the floor and starts laughing his ass off.*


This is probably the best one I've read so far. You've gotta tell me how you come up with these wacky stories, dragon! :D:D:D:D

Seriously, this one is pure, solid gold! :cool:
well (other than the bits of ideas i got from the panda cronicals.) i guess just being as random and silly as possable is what i do

topshot
04-27-2003, 12:30 AM
Well that's good advice. :D

whitedragon
04-27-2003, 04:20 AM
Originally posted by topshot
Well that's good advice. :D
it better be cause its my only advice :p

topshot
04-27-2003, 04:28 AM
I'm working on a story, as of yet. Not much of a spoof, but it's related to the movie "The One." I'm going to try to implement some humor into it. And when I mean related, I mean that as in related to the plot of the movie, but the story is actually my own work. I'll edit this post once I get it up. ;)

EDIT- Topshot's Tale : Episode 1 (http://www.lucasforums.com/showthread.php?postid=1127115#post1127115)

Captain Wilson
04-29-2003, 07:07 PM
some of the words that can be used to describe that would be-pointless,sensnslsless and crazy. I love it. One of you best yet. If i was wearing a hat i would take it off to you but someone would steal it ;)