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-   -   Fic: Luke Skywalker: Computer Problem (http://www.lucasforums.com/showthread.php?t=193043)

CommanderQ 10-16-2008 11:58 AM

Luke Skywalker: Computer Problem
 
Luke Skywalker was sitting next to his computer one day, wondering how to do something. He had just joined a group on the galactic wide internet and wanted to submit a story. He had read the instructions over and over again, but just couldn't understand what to do. Finally, he went to drastic measures. "3P0! I need your help!" he shouted. As much as Luke didn't like C-3P0 he needed help. "Yes, Master Luke!" 3P0 said. Luke took a breath," 3P0, I'm trying to post something on the internet and I ca..." "
"Master, this has considerable risk!" interrupted 3P0, "Do you not realize you can be spammed or scammed! Does anyone know your credit card number! Your password! Or who you are!!" Luke rolled his eyes, "3P0! Stop worrying so much, you aren't helping at all!" 3P0 did something that sounded like a sigh, "Sometimes I just don't understand human behaviour..." and 3P0 walked out of the room, muttering nonsense to himself. Luke decided to take a risk. He wrote his story down in a random place and and was about to press submit. "Whelp, here it goes..." and Luke pressed SUBMIT.

Sabretooth 10-16-2008 12:38 PM

To be perfectly honest, I do not know what to say about this story. It appears to be a comedy dealing with your own state (I saw you inquire on how to enter Javyar's ;) ). However, I can't quite see what the problem was. The conversation wasn't very thick either, and I'm wondering at the moment whether this was a single-post fic or a multi-post one.

All in all, I really have nothing to say other than Welcome to CEC! :D

Lynk Former 10-16-2008 01:02 PM

-post snipped-


Your comment was uncalled for Lynk. CEC is for constructive criticism and not insults. Since you have made many posts on this site you should be well aware of the rules regarding posting. Keep your comments constructive in the future- JM 12

Endorenna 10-16-2008 02:09 PM

Lynk, that was uncalled for! :sithm:

I liked the line about, "Do they know your credit card number? Or your password? Or who you are?!" :lol: I can just see 3PO saying that...

CommanderQ 10-16-2008 02:50 PM

When I wrote this story, it was actually just an experiment to figure out how to post a story. The next stories that I will write will be a bit better, though. It was still fun to make.

You can always use the edit function if you make changes. Feel free to do so.- JM12

LordOfTheFish 10-16-2008 04:58 PM

Hmm, interesting...

machievelli 10-16-2008 06:50 PM

removed

JediMaster12 10-16-2008 07:26 PM

Alright folks keep the criticism constructive. Let us keep this forum a fun place. - JediMaster12

Det. Bart Lasiter 10-17-2008 03:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CommanderQ (Post 2539505)
Luke Skywalker was sitting next to his computer one day, wondering how to do something. He had just joined a group on the galactic wide internet and wanted to submit a story. He had read the instructions over and over again, but just couldn't understand what to do. Finally, he went to drastic measures. "3P0! I need your help!" he shouted. As much as Luke didn't like C-3P0 he needed help. "Yes, Master Luke!" 3P0 said. Luke took a breath," 3P0, I'm trying to post something on the internet and I ca..." "
"Master, this has considerable risk!" interrupted 3P0, "Do you not realize you can be spammed or scammed! Does anyone know your credit card number! Your password! Or who you are!!" Luke rolled his eyes, "3P0! Stop worrying so much, you aren't helping at all!" 3P0 did something that sounded like a sigh, "Sometimes I just don't understand human behaviour..." and 3P0 walked out of the room, muttering nonsense to himself. Luke decided to take a risk. He wrote his story down in a random place and and was about to press submit. "Whelp, here it goes..." and Luke pressed SUBMIT.

install linux problem solved :kamina:

Lynk Former 10-17-2008 04:00 AM

What I said in my first post in this thread before it got edited was "I think you need to spend more time masturbating and less time writing fics of any kind... you're better off, and so are we."

While it may have sounded harsh to a certain mod who was meant to give me a warning before she infracted me (yes, I know how things work around here because I used to work here too), it wasn't meant to be a mean comment.

I was just having a little fun with you CommanderQ. Welcome aboard, I find your fic very unconventional and interesting. Good job :p

The_Catto 10-17-2008 07:05 AM

Welcome to the CEC! :D
Hopefully get to see some awesome stories from you soon!

CommanderQ 10-17-2008 10:50 AM

Thanks Lynk and Mr. BFA

machievelli 10-17-2008 03:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CommanderQ (Post 2539909)
Thanks Lynk and Mr. BFA


I expect more from you as well CQ.

CommanderQ 10-17-2008 04:13 PM

Imperial Palace
Coruscant

As Luke submitts randomly to who knows where, Han Solo is sitting in front of his computer playing music. Darth Vader music. Han loves the Darth Vader theme and started singing along with it.

"Dum dum dum dom de dum dom de dum!" sang Han.

He then began to turn around in circles on his swivel chair, acting like he was 30 years younger. This wasn't normal for Han who usually says things like, "Let's go find some trouble, eh kid," or, "I gotta bad feeling about this." That or "I hate snakes, I hate 'em!" But that's a different story entirely.

Han is having a great time doing things he would never do until he notices that he was being watched. Leia was standing at the far end of the room with a huge grin on her face. Han stopped and said, "Honey, don't tell look Chewie! He'll never let me live this down!"

Leia chuckled, "I don't think I'LL let you live this down." She then left the room. Han shook his head and looked at the computer. It suddenly started beeping as the security screen went off.

"You have been spammed! Security leak, potentially dangerous!" the computer security shouted.

Han clicked on who the risk was and a name showed up: LukeSkywalker@jeditemple. Han couldn't believe what he was spammed with. It was a story called "The Tale of the Pink Rabbit." Han gasped aloud.

"Luke!" he shouted to himself, "What's happened to you!" Han stood and ran out the building to find Luke at the Jedi Temple.

Part 3 coming soon...

This story is like a comedic infinities story, this would never happen to Luke or Han and so on. heh

Inyri 10-17-2008 11:20 PM

Quote:

Shortly after Luke submitted randomly to who knows where, Han Solo is sitting in front of his computer playing music.
You have written in two completely different tenses within one sentence. Pick one tense to write in and stick with it.

Also it's Coruscant, not Coroscant.

CommanderQ 10-18-2008 12:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Inyri (Post 2540179)
You have written in two completely different tenses within one sentence. Pick one tense to write in and stick with it.

Also it's Coruscant, not Coroscant.

Thanks for noticing. I do have a tense problem, and the miss spelling will be fixed.

LordOfTheFish 10-18-2008 11:01 PM

Improvement from part 1, no doubt.

Quote:

Originally Posted by CommanderQ
This story is like a comedic infinities story, this would never happen to Luke or Han and so on. heh
That's what FanFic's are best at.

CommanderQ 10-19-2008 12:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by machievelli (Post 2539996)
I expect more from you as well CQ.

Thank you Machievelli:D, sorry I didn't thank you earlier.

CommanderQ 10-20-2008 01:43 PM

Luke Skywalker: Computer Problem Part 3
 
Coruscant
Jedi Temple

Luke sits happily in front of his computer as he hooks up a webcam to his pal Han Solo, who was online. Luke took the last cord and stuck it into the computer, and an instant video appeared. Han was sitting in front of his computer too, but didn't know that the webcam was on. Luke smiled and pressed record and left the room to grab a sandwich.

Suddenly, Luke's computer blinked red and flashed about. Luke ran to it and clicked the problem.

"Government system hacked! Security Screen online!" the computer shouted.

The computer's screen went blank and Luke shouted something that was better not to be typed down.

Suddeny, someone knocked on Luke's door. Luke went over and opened, Han rushed inside,

"Luke! We gotta get you out of here!" shouted Han.

"Why," Luke said bewildered.

"You hacked into my computer, a government computer, anytime now the CSF will be breaking down your door!"

Luke shook his head," No they wouldn't. I'm a Jedi Master, what threat would I be?"

Han sighed," I'll get you out using the Falcon. I think there's a guy in CSF who doesn't like you, Luke!"


Next door to Luke's Apartment
Jedi Temple

"Officer Jones, do you know anything yet about the robbery of my apartment?" asked Boba Fett.

Officer Jones shook his head, "None that we know of Mr. Fett."

Boba stood from his seat in his apartment, "I have no idea why I moved to the Jedi Temple! I can't hunt anymore Jedi ever since Solo pushed me into that jerk of a sarlacc. There went my rep!"

Officer Jones stood as well, "I'll check with Master Luke Skywalker, next door. He might help."

Boba nodded, "I'm going to the cantina to wash away my worries. If you need anything meet me there."

Officer Jones frowned and walked out the door.



Luke's Apartment
Jedi Temple

Someone knocked on the door. Han and Luke looked at the door quickly.

"CSF here! I've gotta a couple questions for ya!"

Han gasped, "Oh No! They''ve come! Let's get out, Luke! Out the window!"

Luke, scared from the story Han told him about what happens to people who hack into the Imperial palace, moved fast. He forced push the window open and he and Han jumped out. They then ran to the nearest cantina, the same cantina Boba Fett was going to.

Upcoming part 4

Endorenna 10-20-2008 01:58 PM

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

CommanderQ 10-22-2008 01:48 PM

Luke Skywalker: Computer Problem Part 4
 
Coruscant
A Cantina near the Jedi Temple


Han and Luke walked slowly into the Cantina, staring at the various hives of scum and villiany. Han smiled, "Ha, just like old times, eh, Luke."

Luke covered his nose, "Smells just like old times, too."

Han shrugged. He didn't seem to notice the smell, because he was stepping in it. He didn't notice, though, so he kept on walking right down the aisle.
Luke whispered," Hey, Han, I think we should lie low and not strut around like you're doing now. We're fugitives, thanks to you."

Han smiled, "Fugitives, nah, we're stylish refugees."

Luke rolled his eyes, "Just LIKE old times."

Han and Luke kept on walking until they reached the reached the main bar.

A scruffy man in a dirty brown shirt came to their help, "What'y'all have?"

Han put on his "cool" face and leaned on the table, "I'lll have a Correlian ale."

The bartender started laughing, "I'm sorry, heh, I'm sorry, I just can't take you seriously with that face...Who are you, Han Solo? Heh. Oh, okay I'll get your drinks, heheh."

Han's face had gone from "cool" to embarrassed. Luke tapped the bartender on the shoulder.

"I'll have a milk."

This made the bar tender and much of the bar hysterical with laughter. Even Han was laughing.

"Kid," he said, "When you go to a bar, you order a real drink." Han was apparently happy about the embarrassment being lifted from him to Luke.

Suddenly the whole bar went quiet, everyone's eyes blank. Luke smiled, and the bartender gave him his milk.

Han sighed, "No fair, I don't have the force."

Luke smiled,"Better to have milk then dead brain cells."

Han rolled his eyes and sighed. Suddenly he noticed a familiar sight: Green armor complete with weapons and a helmet, only a few feet away.

"Oh, no."

"What is it, Han."

Han pointed a shaky hand, "Boba Fett, they hired Boba Fett!"

Luke looked at Boba Fett and sighed, "Han! Stop assuming everyone's out to get us!"

Suddenly a blaster shot from a random gunfight on the other side of the cantina, hit the bulkhead near Han's face. "You sure?" he said

Suddenly, Han noticed something peculiar about Boba. He was swaying back and forth, drunk.

"Doo da day, I think, flzzerel,le to. Heheheheheh," Boba said. He then started swaying back and forth again.

"I didn't think I hurt his feelings THAT badly when I pushed him into the sarlacc."

Luke sighed, "You're getting soft in your old age, Han."

"Poor guy, this is all my fault?"

Luke rolled his eyes, "Yeah, Han. All your fault. He's content with drowning himself in liquor."

Han walked over to Boba, "I think I should help him out."

Luke shook his head,"No, Han, don't do it."

Han tapped Boba's shoulder, "Are you Boba Fett?"

Boba coughed, "No, I am Mrs. Nezbit."

Han kept from laughing, "No, you're Boba Fett, show some backbone."

Boba wasn't making eye contact with Han, "You're right, I shouldn't be like this. Thanks for the help..." Boba stood and looked at Han.

"Hi, Fett."

"YOU!"

Luke drank his milk down and handed it to the bartender. He pointed at Han and said, "I don't know that guy." Boba picked up his rifle, and Han grabbed Luke. "To the Falcon!" he shouted. The two men ran quickly from the Cantina to the spaceport, Boba hot on their heels.

"My rep will be saved with your capture, Solo!" Boba said.

Han whispered to himself, "Should've brought Chewie."

The two men made it to the Falcon in hangar 41 and locked the door. Boba banged hard on its surface, but he quickly left. Han sat in the pilot's seat, Luke in the co-pilot's. "Hey, Luke, how does Tatooine sound to you?"

Luke nodded,"It's okay."

Suddenly, the smell of the cantina reached Luke's nose, and he looked at Han's foot.

"Hey, Han, "he said.

"Yeah, Kid."

"What's that on your foot?"

Han looked and his eyes went wide, "AHHHHH MAN!!"



PART 5 coming soon....

Endorenna 10-22-2008 04:20 PM

Hahahahaha, that was funny! (You stole Mrs. Nezbit from Buzz!) ;)

CommanderQ 10-22-2008 08:29 PM

Yeah, I thought it might seem pretty funny coming from Boba Fett, hehheh

The_Catto 10-23-2008 07:00 AM

Lol, nice so far. It's refreshing to have a comedy fic in the mix every once and a while.
Good work, CommanderQ.

knight 12167 10-24-2008 02:44 AM

This is great! awsomely funny keep it up

CommanderQ 10-27-2008 02:17 PM

Luke Skywalker:Computer Problem part 5
 
Millenium Falcon
Somewhere in space

Han Solo and Luke Skywalker sat quietly in the cockpit of the Millenium Falcon. Little did they know that they were being watched. Three blue ghosts of the Jedi, Yoda, Obi-Wan, and Anakin, stood quietly watching Luke and Han.

Anakin spoke first, "You know, I used to have a friend like Han. Always getting me into trouble, heheh."

Obi-Wan turned to face Anakin, "Oh, you did, did you!? What else were you hiding from me!"

Anakin's face turned red, "Master, I didn't mean to be disrespectful of you and the council. I just happened to have a lot of friends."

This made Obi-Wan angrier. "Not disrespect me?! You had a girlfriend for years and you didn't even invite me to the wedding!"

Anakin sighed, "Master, you know very well that if everyone knew I had a wife, I'd have to leave the council!"

Obi-Wan sighed as well, "Well, why did you have a girlfriend, then?"

Anakin shrugged. Obi-Wan sighed once more, "Had I known you'd have kids like Luke and Leia, we probably would've made an exception."

Anakin frowned, "Master, how would you be able to tell that I'd have kids, I didn't even know 'till I chopped off Luke's hand!"

Obi-Wan chuckled, "Fine father figure you are!"

Yoda laughed aloud, "It seems, that I'm the only one enjoying being dead and in the afterlife, hoo hoo hoo. Never stop arguing you do."

Yoda then took a packet of cheese munchies out of his cloak and started to eat and laugh.




Luke and Han sat quietly, not saying anything to each other. Han smiled and looked at Luke and spoke up first," Well, this is fun, just like the old days, eh, Luke."

Luke smiled back, "Yeah, this is fun, we're being chased by Boba Fett and we're on the run from Coruscant authorities. Yep, old times."

Han frowned, "Ah, come on Luke, you gotta have a little fun like this."

Luke chuckled, "Yep, I haven't had so much fun since my hand got cut off."

Han shook his head and brought the ship out of lightspeed. "Well, here we are, Tatooine."

The ship cruised slowly into Mos Eisley space port and landed softly on the sand. The Falcon's ramp lowered and Luke and Han walked out to the customs post. A man in a light blue shirt and pants walked up to them.

"Hello, and welcome to Mos Eisley space port! I hope you enjoy your stay."
The man was always smiling, then again, he was a tourist guide.

"Does your ship need refueling, sir?"

Han nodded, "Let me see how much the fuel is."

The man handed Han a small wooden board.Han's face showed shock, "The gas prices are through the roof! 5 credits a gallon! What's coming to the world!"

Luke nudged Han, "Maybe you should ask Leia to petition a new fuel like..."
Han elbowed Luke, "Stop being so smart, Luke! First milk over alcohol, now the force over fuel!"

Han handed the board back to the man, "Well, just fill 'er up, okay."

The man smiled, "Sure thing, oh by the way, do you know a man in green Mandalorian armor."

Han gasped, "Yeah, why?"

The man started walking away, "Oh, there's some guy in green armor at the Cantina who keeps saying he's going to catch Han Solo."

Han and Luke looked at each other and gasped aloud. They then walked back to the Falcon, slowly and carefully. Suddenly, a ship flew over head and Han and Luke looked up. A semi-small ship stood hovering in the air.

"Hey Han, what type of ship is that?"

Han looked closer, "A Fire-spray assault craft, why?"

Luke pointed at the ship's side, it said Slave 1.

Han gasped again and grabbed Luke's shoulder, "To the Cantina!"

Luke tried his best to walk\drag with Han.

Suddenly, the Slave 1's loudspeakers crackled to life.

"Hiya Solo!"

Just like old times.


Part 6 upcoming...

Endorenna 10-27-2008 04:41 PM

Haha. Boba had it in for Han after he pushed him into the Sarlaac. :^:

knight 12167 10-27-2008 05:09 PM

Love this fic

Yoda eats cheese crunchies?

CommanderQ 10-27-2008 06:02 PM

Yeah, this time we showed Yoda's secret love for food {cheese munchies in particular}. :D

Rev7 10-28-2008 01:09 AM

Not bad. Keep it up!

Bee Hoon 10-29-2008 11:57 AM

Ahhh Yoda and cheese munchies ;D Out of curiosity, who's this friend that Anakin is talking about? I liked the banter between them, and the wry references to Luke's arm being cut off. Keep it up! :D

CommanderQ 10-29-2008 12:54 PM

Thanks Bee! Thanks Rev!

Well, I'm not exactly sure which "Friend" Anakin is talking about, but I think it might've been Kitster from his child hood, but I'm not entirely sure myself. Thanks again!

knight 12167 10-29-2008 05:35 PM

Yeah I read Tattoine Ghost and it said Kister and ani where likable troublemakers

CommanderQ 10-29-2008 06:48 PM

Yeah, then it would probably be Kitster.

The_Catto 10-29-2008 11:27 PM

Haha, "Hiya Solo!"

Lol, I'm loving this fic, CommanderQ.
Nice work indeed! Very funny!
Looking forward to more!

PS: The Force over fuel??? Hmm, if only! :lol:

CommanderQ 10-30-2008 01:35 AM

Thanks Mr. BFA! The next part will probably be coming soon! :D

The Force would probably be alot better than fuel, haha:lol:

The_Catto 10-30-2008 08:04 PM

A lot more cheaper as well x]

CommanderQ 10-31-2008 02:39 PM

Yeah, gas is expensive these days, agghhh! Cheaperness would be good right around now.:D

CommanderQ 11-03-2008 03:50 PM

Part 6

Tatooine
Mos Eisley Spaceport

Han and Luke started running as fast they could toward the cantina. Slave 1 was hot on their tails, preparing a devastating barrage of proton torpedoes.

"Going somewhere, Solo?! You think you can escape Boba Fett!" Blared Slave 1's loudspeakers.

Han stopped running and looked at the incoming ship.

"You know, you really need a better catch phrase. I mean, "Going somewhere, Solo" is completely out of style by way of phrases!"

Luke grabbed Han's arm, 'Don't do it, Han. I told you not to talk to him on Coruscant. Three words, take...my...advice."

Boba spoke again, "Okay, then, how's this! Bu-Bye, SOLO!"

Han turned around and started walking away,"Nah, I'm not getting the annoying feeling that comes with bad phrases."

"You sure, I'm getting one." Whispered Luke.

A missile broke out of its socket and rocketed toward Han and Luke. Han pushed Luke into a small alcove near the cantina and quickly jumped after him. The missile lost its target and began searching for another one. And seeing that Slave 1 was the only ship airbourne at the time, it reacquired a target. The missile changed direction.

"No, no! What's it doing!" Shouted Boba.

The missile collided with Boba's engines. The ship lost power and fell to the ground in a bunch of smoke. Luke and Han stood quickly and began running toward the cantina, reaching it without problem. Suddenly, the smoke filled canopy of what was Slave 1 flew into the air and Boba Fett stepped out.

"First, you throw me into a Sarlacc and now you blow up my ship,"Boba began to laugh hysterically, "You're in for it, Solo."

Boba then made a personal note in his mind, Hey! I just got a catch-phrase!

End of Part 6

Part 7 is soon to come...

Rev7 11-03-2008 07:12 PM

Nice update!


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