My friend's in History class:
I have a penis! AH! Question!
My other friend's in conversation:
Oh my God, you are so horny. I mean, nosy.
Oohh! Vile epitaphs! (meaning epithets)
(pre-explaination: I was at my friend Dana's, and we had this piece of chocolate cake in her basement. My other friend Edmee wanted some so I took a bit off and put it in her mouth so she could eat it. Dana left for the bathroom, and then I proceeded to [as a joke] stick the entire cake in Edmee's mouth [as she was laughing hysterically] after tons of laughter Dana walked back into the room)
Dana (referring to the cake): Oh my God! It's all over the floor!
Me: That's because I shoved it in her mouth!
(we laughed for hours)
I can't seem to think up a good signature.