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Old 11-14-2004, 11:03 AM   #24
Fealiks
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Britain
Posts: 2,202
okay, not for a while. Here goes.

STORY SO FAR!
Out of the darkness he saw the little flash of light. That was the sign. He thumbed the safety catch off… it was now or never.

He rethumbed the safety catch on, deciding that he could never do it. Not ever.

His hands began to shake and he started to sweat uncontrollably. He knew that by giving up without a fight, they would win.

But, he stuck by his first decision and went off too eat a burger instead, but little did he know that...

... the burger had been exposed to gamma rays and toxic waste, mutating it into a grotesque psychotic meaty monster.

"Do I get fries with this?" he muttered under his breath, once again releasing the safety catch on his... wait, that's not a gun. Who puts a safety catch on a toothbrush?

He tried to brush, wondering why the safety catch was there... BAM! er... nothing. He later found that the safety catch was merely a piece of meat

Armed with just a safety catch-less toothbrush, he prepared himself for battle with the mutated burger monster. Suddenly a thought came to him. what he needed was a

person who could help him defeat the monster. So he asked the person next to him to help him. They then...

...flew into action, but accidentaly hit a wall because the universe seems to also have a sense of humour. But the wall wasn't a wall, but actually turned out to be...
marzipan. "what the hell is going on??!" shouted the man in frustration. little did he know that things were about to get weirder...
when the hambuger monster sperated and made two. He got up after the 1st hambuger monster blew him down...........

wait he thought to himself, I've still got to do the thing that sivy ahem, uh I had came for in the begining. The burgers backed away knowing that this was important. "Grandma, he said " I'm a --...
"i'm in love with oddly shaped fruit and that’s why grandpa got suckered into this. but don't worry, i'll get him out! no mutant burgers are going to stop me!" he then picked his up toothbrush and left.
Our young hero, Ick Van Shneidenheid II, was off to his best freind's house, he had a carboot sale there and had heard that there were som Geeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrate toothbrushes there, so he bought the laser sonicare one for £250 (yeah, ££££!!!) and went to Manbroom lambbad to talk about the...
...one thing that could probably kill a fuc..... coff coff ...mutating hamburger....(drum rolls)....THE ZEROFASCINATIONINSTATION 5000 whith safety thingy et all. This weapon was devised by the master minds of the CIA, for the attack of the mutant lobsters in the Vegas sub and....
....university of Liverpool which are currently updating the ad shown in....
L.A. The Person who selled this to our hero was a person whom knowledge of the secret matters were very well known to him, like the flying bicycles that the bushadmnistration is trying to invent or the sub-narotiomanism system that nobody knows what the fu it is!
Ick Van Shneidenheid II then went off to blockbusters to buy porn porn. Damn, I mean er... sex videos. NO, erm, Die Hard, yeah he rented Die Hard he kept it under his bed because...
at the middle of the night he had the urge to watch Bruce Willis's tight arse. Then he kept the lethal weapon that could kill mutating Hamburgers under his bed also because tomorrow he would be hunting them!So when he fell asleep he dreamt of....
...Brucee's lap dancing skills in a room surrounded by red velvet curtains. He woke up not only to realize that baby oil has a new use, but also...
That it was already noon. So he picked up the lethal weapon that could kill Mutant Burgers an went out for the hunt. He started ....


my part:

...scratching his arse cause he'd layed on a nail, then went out to kill the hamburgers by...

Last edited by Fealiks; 11-14-2004 at 11:16 AM.
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