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Old 07-15-2005, 06:11 PM   #18
Star Ghost
@Star Ghost
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: On Dantooine Status: Has become one with the force.
Posts: 90
Hi guys, got caught up in summer vacation so i haven't posted for a while.

I have been messing around with a story for about a year, i once wrote all the way to chapter 5 then relized i was writitng like a 5 year old and started again about twice.

With lack of a better name i am calling it 'Fairyland: The Darksword'

What it's about:
The demi-goddess of darkness, Necria, is jealous of the full gods because they have more power than her. Then she learns of an ancient artifact called the darksword, which is held by the mysterious clan of Brightstar. She sends her army of dark and foul beasts and damned men to destroy the clan and bring her the sword, which is said to have the power to destroy entire continents, even heaven. But the Brightstar clan's leader, the Far Seer John (aka star ghost) foresees all of these events years before they happen, and decides to make war with the assistance of the god of the stars.

Btw there may be some romance later and some parts are missing because i am workking on how to introduce all the characters.
Also this is the first time i've shared my work so can i have some feedback?

Chapter 1

'death... destruction...'
'ha ha ha... i will destroy you...
'The gods are against you'
'the gods will not defend you... they gave the sword to you to protect...'
'You shall be slain'
'join me... we can rule the earth and more... together'
'You can not seduce me you fool'
'you waste your power 'Star Ghost'... who thought of that name! Ha ha ha ha... I shall corrupt your soul'

A surge of dark energy coursed through John's body as he violently jerked in his sleep and then woke up sweating and panting.

"Master, are you alright?" his servent enquired.
"Yes, you are dismissed."
"Yes master" the servant bowed and left the room.

John thought about Necria's offer, though he wasn't thinking about accepting it. He remembered his childhood. Before he discovered his powers he had been 'free', meaning he had had time to do things he wanted. He had had a special girl. After the clan discovered that he was a Seer, he was forbidden to see her again. After they discovered he was a Far Seer, The Far Seer, he was immeadiatly made leader of the clan and given his freedom back. But now she hated him.

Chapter to be continued.
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