Even though TSL is incomplete and full of plot holes, TSL makes more sense to me if K1's Revan was a DS male. Conversations with Kreia, even if you chose the LS option, just make Revan sound like a DS male. And it makes sense to me that if a jedi turned from war and had to leave for some years to get his or her head together (reflect) that jedi would be LS even if only marginally. So for me the story would be K1 DS male and K2 LS gender doesn't matter.
How do I actually play? I play all permutations I can. Each game I just play whatever I feel like at the time.