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Old 12-28-2005, 10:04 AM   #129
Charie's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Lithuania
Posts: 130
El Virus
As a short introduction, one of the words I use most often is 'hate'. I hate people who are cleverer than me, they make me feel mentally incompetent, and I hate those who are more stupid than I am, for the same reason, basically. Conclusion here is that, probably, I just hate humans on the whole (or, more preciesly, interacting with them).
So much for the lyrical digression.

That has been the thing with me; all I ever cared for was being old enough to do whatever I wanted <...>; and I lost my chances to enjoy some situations.
What could a child possibly want that isn't allowed to him? Or maybe it's just me, I was (and am) a spoiled child, never really denied anything I wanted. What situations are you talking about?

I still adore imagining too, and it is why I practically never get bored, but it's not the same now.
I also don't play pirates under the table anymore; I wouldn't fit in there.
Though yes, it's hard for me to get bored, as well; however in my case I believe it is due to overall idleness, not vivid imagination.

I wouldn't want to become a kid again; I've always believed that my current age is the best one ever.

You know, that's a strange thought - about you as a child. I can imagine some much too serious for his own good, pondering little guy, astounding adults with his pessimistic philosophic views of the universe and refusing to eat candy or run along with other kids in favour of reading Socrates.
I remember that when I was around thirteen, I once went to some distant aquaitance's of mother's house and there was this child, not older than eight, who was wise and intelligent as I'll never grow to be. One of the most embarrasing experiences in my life, it was. It's incredible how some adults can be so dumb, and virtually toddlers so sage. Though I suppose being as completely average as I am is... average.

One of the things that I like about life is not knowing what to expect, and being forced to improvise some time or another.
But don't get the impression that I'm a bum who is constantly changing his mind and leaving everything.
I didn't get such an impression at all, don't worry: in your case it seems unlikely.
By the way, it's one of the things about my life I hate most: not knowing what to expect. Surprises. Mostly, both pleasant and unpleasant surprises end up badly for me. It's some talent I've got here, I suspect.

I 'hate' myself because I am part of a struggling middle-class normal family, have caring parents, etc. so I shouldn't be complaining, as there are tons of people who have it worse than me.
And this is also an issue, as I do not dare tell anyone when I feel sad or un-happy, just because I am certain they will tell me that I am being silly.
Yep, when I'm complaining, they always tell me just that: that there're others who suffer much much more than I do, and I'm just being blind egoistic. Oh, and, of course, that everything is in the end my own fault. As if I didn't know that myself.
I don't think that 'it could be worse' is a credible argument, however. See, it always could be worse, no matter the situation.
As for not being able to tell anyone how you really feel - well, that only means you didn't find a right 'someone', yet.

Don't think that I care about many people; the amount of relatives and acquaintances I get along with is quite small.
I didn't think that. Sincerely caring about the small amount of close people is what is considered normal. And good. It's certainly way better than not worrying about anybody but yourself.

What language was your game in? Russian?
Hmpf. If you call that monstrosity I have on my disk Russian, then yes.

If you allow me to say it; you two are the most open-minded religious persons I know, and I truly respect you for that.
Perhaps that's because we are not really religious.

I'm not sure what does the mysterious notion 'young idealist' mean, especially a normal one, but once I sort of mused it would be nice to have a religion. Out of interest. As for Islam - I still didn't find a time to explore the religion properly (all because of Harry Potter), but I want to believe and I will, it's as simple as that (well, plus a couple of personal little matters). Until I don't want. Allah help me. You won't find deep philosophical meaning when concerning me; I don't appreciate profound sacraments and grave approach to the subject (any subject) very much.

you're the most open-minded atheist I know. Too many people have laughed at my face for believing in anything and called me a mindless slave to the church.
Those people you've met before were not atheists but downright cretins, then. If they think difference in belief somehow exuses rudeness.
Uhuh, one atheistic guy I liked very much once told me that, in his opinion, no belief is also a belief. Like, you know, a person has to believe in something, be that money, or Buddah, or fluffy little elephants in his head.

Besides, does anybody really know anything worthwhile abour religions?
There's a kernel of truth there.
As for my personal views on my own religion - wait until I read Koran. Not happening in the near future, though.

Last edited by Charie; 12-28-2005 at 10:28 AM.
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