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Old 03-05-2006, 03:38 AM   #196
machievelli
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Las Vegas Nevada
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Sorry everyone. It seems I must have forgotten to post my review on friday. Consider me rebuked.


Coruscant Entertainment center


Darth Insurgo - Heir To The Sith
Potsie

Before and during the beginning to Phantom Menace. Another young Sith works to become master.

Youíre making the same mistakes as before, Potsie. A novel or story is not like a movie. Movies have to be fast paced because the audience isnít going to sit still forever. But I have sat in one place for several hours reading a good book.
Again, slow down. Lead the reader, donít drag him.
All in all a good concept, and an interesting underside view of what occurred in Phantom Menace.

The Mandalorian Apprentice
Reclaimer

Set in the KOTOR era. A Mandalorian Jedi is hunted by bounty hunters.

Except for spelling and grammar errors, this is pretty good. The biggest problems I had were minor. One, where in the Mandalore code does it say you cannot be a Jedi? The average warrior code praises a warrior for discovering and using new talents, and a warrior code places someone who defends those unable to defend themselves higher than one who battle only for gain.

Second, and I have to agree with JM12 on this, why place a bounty on an entire race?

Other than those, great work, and I want to see more.

Ebon Hawk Pranksters
CountVerilucus

Set during KOTOR, the crew decides on a plan to get Bastila to lighten up.

I was amused almost instantly with this little piece. The set up for the prank was outstanding, and using HK as the straight man was choice.
Check your grammar and spelling. Other than that, thumbs way up, kid.



Galactic Senate Coruscant Theater


Star Wars: The New Empire
Grand Admiral Thrawn

Another splinter of the Empire strikes out 29 years after the battle of Endor.

Except for grammar and spelling, i saw nothing wrong with it.
One reviewer on the site gave him flak for having an Admiral that expected people to call him Chief Master Sergeant. When i read it I merely considered the military mentality. Most grab the highest rank they ever achieve, such as Custer wanting to be called General even after that rank was no longer his. The character earned CMS, and feels that anything else was given to him.
Well done, and I am sorry he stopped after two chapters.

The chronicles of the sith
Lord LeHack

The start of a young Sithís path.

The biggest problem is that LeHack forgets to have conversation breaks in his writing, and some grammar punctuation and spelling problems. No biggie.
I enjoyed the idea of seeing the actual Sith species for the first time, but the timing left a lot to be desired. There is no timeline on when Korriban was originally settled, and whether that first settlement was human or Sith. The Essential Chronology and the previous books imply almost a thousand years between the first incursions by the Sith species, and the break away Jedi joining them. Yet he has compressed it (In my opinion) into a period of fifty odd years.


The Voyage Home
Tresk Imínel

Set four years after the battle of Yavin concurrent with the Rogue Squadron books. Two people find love among the ravages of the civil war.

Treskís first work according to other reviewers is definitely worth reading. They style is a bit stilted, and needs some work, but that is just polishing rather than a major rewrite.


From Kotorfanmedia

Revanís Gift
Allronix

Set during the interim between KOTOR and KOTOR II. Three years after Revan left her crew to travel alone, Mission finds a gift.

The style is clean and well rounded. The story excellent. 15 readers on the site gave Allronix a thumbs up, and they are well deserved.



After the Fall
athenaprime

After the Star Forge is destroyed, Nouri (Revan) mourns the loss of Bastila and her innocence.

Athena prime, like a lot of excellent writers, took the story yet another way. We are all working with the same basic ingredients, but having her main character mourning a brain dead Bastila, her love for Carth in tatters, and suffering from survivorís syndrome makes excellent reading. 24 readers gave this a thumb up.

Denouement
David Gaider

After the Star Forge is destroyed, and the Republic celebrates, Revan decides what she wants in life.

David Gaider is an anomaly among us. He works for Bioware, and wrote this piece at the request of fans he knew. He immediately disclaims a lot of things. He denigrates his own work more than the most vicious critic.
Yet 34 readers gave it a thumbs up. 21 reviewed it.
Not bad, eh?


'To argue with those who have renounced the use and authority of reason is as futile as to administer medicine to the dead.' Now who said that?

From the one who brought you;
What we die for...
Acceptance
KOTOR excerpts
Star Wars: The Beginning
Star Wars: Republic Dawn
Return From Exile
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