Thread: The Sith Lord
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Old 05-31-2006, 04:54 PM   #92
Jae Onasi
@Jae Onasi
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Originally Posted by Pottsie
Thanks Jae. I think if I have time, I may edit some Chapters and describe Kyle, Jaden and all the other Characters who some may not know from JA. Battles are a bit boring when I write them (It's because I don't write very good Battles). The dialogue is set out like it is, because I've read books and that is how they're set out. But if you want in my next Fic, I shall do that. If I write a Fic after this one, everything shall be improved. Hopefully.
Nothing wrong with emulating (not copying!) someone else's style in well-written works, and the EU books are at least entertaining, if not Pulitzer prize winners. I'm not complaining, mind you, and I'm not trying to be offensive with constructive critiques. It's not as fun to have the 'areas to improve' pointed out like it is the good or fun stuff. Nor are the things I commented on 'bad', they are just areas to make better. I do that because I know you have the ample ability and desire to learn from those comments and improve, because I've seen your writing improve as you've been going along.
Writing takes time to develop, too. The writing I did as a freshman in high school was very different from the writing I do now, but I had to do a lot of writing along the way to learn and improve. Boy, did I have to do a lot. Some of my freshman high school writing was atrocious--you're way ahead of where I was at the same age. I'm _still_ learning! Believe it or not, the writing you do here will help in your regular studies, and vice versa. You can't lose there, even if you don't like school.

I find battle scenes challenging myself--how do you take a very fluid scene with action happening all over the place and condense all that down into words on a page? It's tough. If battles are boring, spice them up a bit. Make the good guys or bad guys do something totally unexpected that surprises everyone and makes them have to react in a novel way. Your battle scenes are not bad, btw. I think they can be pretty intense sometimes, and I like intense battle scenes where I can feel like I'm in the middle of the action and have to duck with the character.

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