Thread: [Fic] Survivour
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Old 10-06-2008, 03:37 PM   #12
JediMaster12
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OK this was better. There is a minor thing. It is break not brake, unless he was driving a speeder
Your description is getting better and I see you describing quite a bit more. You are taking the time to show us what the character is going through and that is good. Keep going.

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