Thread: [NSW-Fic] The Squad
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Old 02-19-2009, 11:34 AM   #8
Bee Hoon
@Bee Hoon
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Sydney
Posts: 1,269
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I like how creative it is, although there are typos and punctuation errors. As always, all your little touches add great depth: the regulated flying height, the unicorn (!!), the explanation of the resonance field (although I got lost somewhere through the explanation) and so on. As you intended, I'm left wondering about the sword--why he was chosen for it, and by whom. By the way, you said that they had did activating the resonance field somehow undo the seal which also removed human powers?

The sun goes down and the sky reddens, pain grows sharp.
light dwindles. Then is evening
when jasmine flowers open, the deluded say.
But evening is the great brightening dawn
when crested cocks crow all through the tall city
and evening is the whole day
for those without their lovers

-Kuruntokai 234, translated by A.K. Ramanujan

[Fic] Shreds of a Dying Belief
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