Then I'd be fat and curse like a sailor--and be responsible for managing the Jerky Boys as well being known and remembered as the chief who epically beat down officer Harry Cox for discourteous entry while wearing a "stupid effing hat".
What if Totenkopf was really Mick Foley--errm, Cactus 'Sack'?
"I wasn't counting cards, I was cheating."
"Ugh. you give me hives."
"It's Tee-revor time!!!"