hmm, that's strange, your gfx card should show up under primary display driver. you have to select it and press enter before it shows up though. but either way, the game should be waay more stable in software mode.
have you tried launching the game straight from the executable and not with the launcher? what I normally do is just make a complete install to harddisk(do not install the directx version that comes with gf, it is way outdated.) copy over my patch like you did, and it should work. If not, the only other solutions I can suggest to you are updating your directx version and reducing hardware acceleration through the directx control panel or install win 98 instead of xp and try to run it on that.
I have not tried the game on a macbook, but it runs fine on my iMac with a radeon card. I suppose you are sporting a nvidia card which could prove slightly more troublesome to get to work