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Old 07-09-2013, 11:39 PM   #412
redrob41
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Edmonton
Posts: 941
Current Game: just modding TSL
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zhaboka View Post
Doesn't necessarily need the comma after "undetectable," grammatically speaking. Seems like a dash would be better; i.e. "Juhani wears this light armor to enhance her natural talent for Force Camouflage, making her nearly undetectable - and extremely deadly."

You have been paid a visit by a certified obsessive-compulsive freak. Love the description, it meshes (NPI) with the game descriptions very well.
Thanks Zhaboka. I, too, like to ensure good grammar, but lack the expertise to know ALL the rules.

So, grammar man , what's your take on these saber descriptions:
Quote:
Juhani's own custom built double-bladed lightsaber.The hilt features classic Cathar styling with smooth curves and elegant detailed features. Juhani has added extra 'punch' to the blade. As always the blade is a reflection of the one who wields it; Elegant but fierce.
Quote:
Juhani's own custom built double-bladed lightsaber. The hilt features classic Cathar styling with smooth curves and elegant detailed features. Juhani has added extra 'punch' to the blade. As always the blade is a reflection of the one who wields it; Violent, sharp wrath.



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