I never said coddling them was the thing to do, just that different people find strength differently. But yes, with this second post of yours, you're making a whole lot more sense now that you've elaborated rather than your first post which was severely lacking.
I totally agree that handling things differently for each case is the way to go and yeah, I do agree that some people just need a kick in the rear to set them straight... others don't. This second post of yours is what should have been your first post.
As for telling me to slag off, let this be your first official warning from me and the only one you'll get for anything. Don't talk to me that way again. I'm very harsh in my moderating compared to all of the moderators here which is why I usually stay the hell away from Kavar's.