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The Christmas o
f Ewan Katarn
The deep black space surrounded a lone ship, The Sky Eagle
, where it’s inhabitants: Jedi Knight Ewan Katarn, his girlfriend and sort of Padawan Amber Skye and their faithful and furry companion, Geyyshhyyk, and Christmas was on the air…
“Now Ewan, we’re on our way to Coruscant to celebrate Christmas!” The young Amber shouted out on the main hull where she and Ewan where.
“So? What exactly is Christmas?” Ewan inquired.
“What, you don’t know? Well, now this is terrible, you never had a Christmas?”
Why the fuss about Boss never having celebrated Christmas,
asked Geyyshhyyk who had been working on the engine, My kind doesn’t celebrate it either!
“I know Geyyshh’, but you’re Wookiees, he’s Human,” Amber told Geyyshhyyk, then turning back to Ewan, “Listen, every year, on 25th of December, people celebrate Christmas, it is a time of joy, peace and love, it’s to be with your families. That’s what Christmas is all about!”
“Yeah, well, do I need to remind you I spent about 3 quarters of my life on the Jedi Order?”
“I know Ewan, it’s just, well, you’re my boyfriend, and I’d like to spend it with you…”
“Alright, alright, I’ll go with you,” He smiled.
“Oh, you rock!” Amber yelled, immediately hugging him.
“Well, we on Coruscant yet?”
We are now,
“Well, my first Christmas. This is exciting,” Ewan said.
Upon reaching Coruscant, Ewan docked the ship on a public landing pad and paid the fee for landing.
“Oh and, here’s a little extra for you since it’s Christmas,” Ewan said, handing out more 50 credits, “Merry Christmas.”
“Thank you sir. Merry Christmas as well!” The man said as they walked off the building. Upon reaching the exterior, they had a big surprise. It didn’t seem like Christmas at all. It seemed more like everyone was afraid or something.
“Well, this sure shouts out the spirit of Christmas,” Ewan joked. Geyyshhyyk roared in laughter.
“Don’t say that Ewan,” Amber said, a bit angry, but shook it off. She went to see someone, “Excuse me, lady, what happened here?”
The old lady was frightened and you could see that when she nearly jumped.
“Oh, well, it’s because of Santa Claus. He basically tears Christmas apart this days…”
“Santa Claus?” Ewan asked, “I once heard of a Jedi with that name.”
“Named Santa Claus.”
“Yeah. Wait, now that you think of it, he was Jedi Nicolas, but people called him Santa Claus.”
Amber looked at him with a serious face as Ewan turned to Geyyshhyyk.
I dunno Boss,
He told him on Shyriiwook.
“Eh, don’t look at him like that. The boy is right. Last we heard of, he was on Rhen Var.”
“Rhen Var? That is only a one day trip and we’re still on the 23rd! We maybe still can save Christmas!” Amber shouted excitedly.
“Well then, I guess we wasted a trip to here, let’s go,” Ewan said as the crew re-entered their ship and plot a course to Rhen Var as the Sky Eagle
Meanwhile, on the planet of Rhen Var in the Ice Fortress of the Sith, on chair laid Santa Claus, but, he looked nothing Jedi-like, but more like a Sith. He could sense The Sky Eagle’s
presence from anywhere near space and in so left out a maniacal laugh.
At the main hull on the ship, Ewan was sitting reading a book. He seemed very focused on it until Amber came.
“Hey Ewan, what are you reading?” She asked, curious of what her boyfriend was reading.
“Uh, what? Oh, this? Oh, it’s nothing…” Ewan said, closing the book.
“Listen, Ewan, I need to talk to you,” Amber told him, sitting on the chair besides his, “I’d like you to try and be more felicitous Ewan, not this whole thing.”
“You mean more “Christmasy”? Well, I was robbed of my whole infancy, but then again, I guess that doesn’t count much.”
Hey, you guys! Don’t fight! Besides, we’re reaching Rhen Var,
The Sky Eagle
finally reached Rhen Var and the crew of three came out, and, while Geyyshhyyk was a Wookiee and needed nothing to cover himself, Ewan and Amber put on appropriate clothes for the environment. It seemed very vast, with only a few small houses. The planet was covered with ice and even on the lowest point of the snow planet, you could see the Ice Fortress of the Sith, where they could sense Santa Claus…
“Well, I’m assuming we just go there and convince him to be good?” Ewan asked.
“No, the path is probably blocked with traps.” Amber replied.
“The girl is right, you know,” Said an unknown voice. Amber and Ewan quickly held onto their Lightsabers but didn’t ignite them. Then a short purple humanoid creature on green and red clothing appeared.
“What, you’re one of Santa’s dwarfs?” Ewan joked.
“Ewan! Besides, it’s elves, not dwarfs. But who might you be?” Amber asked.
“I’m kinda like one of those elves, but I’m a Rhenvarian.”
Geyyshhyyk asked, I thought you guys where extinct?
“Contrary to popular belief my Wookiee friend, we are very much alive. Except now with Darth Christmas there on the Fortress, it’s practically impossible to do anything.” The Rhenvarian said.
“Well, we are here to put a sock on it. Heh, sock on it, those socks you put on the fireplace, ha-ha,” Ewan laughed.
“As much as rude that joke sounded, at least you still know things about Christmas.”
“Yup, and that’s what counts. Let’s just get to Darth Christmas,” Ewan said, laughing on the inside.
“You know I don’t have knowledge of the Force but you know I can sense you think his Sith name is amusing,” Amber said, letting out a small grin.
The crew walked towards the ice fortress when they saw it had to be climbable and it seemed very hard when Ewan had an idea. He brought his speeder and the three hopped on it. He started the engines and with an enormous shout, the speeder burst off right to the entrance of the Fortress. They left the speeder where it was and entered the gigantic fortress…
Although it had large dimensions, it was a one-way up by a very accidentally slidable spiral surface.
“Aagh!” Amber shouted, almost falling out had it not been for Ewan who picked her up by her kneecaps and back before letting her go.
“Thanks,” She thanked.
Eventually, they reached a large ice door, which seemed impossible to open.
“Heh. Nothing a “little heat” can’t melt,” Ewan said as he ignited his Silver Lightsaber and Amber her Green Staffsaber. Geyyshhyyk prepared his Bowcaster as he repeatedly shot the door with roars as Ewan and Amber plunged their Sabers onto the door. Finally, it gave up and opened as they entered a very security-like room as they saw a beaten up and tied up Santa Claus on the center of it.
“Santa!” Amber shouted out as she ran at him but suddenly the room burst and while nobody got hurt, a figure appeared. It had brown short hair, and had a blue suit.
“Greetings. As many of you believe, he hasn’t fallen to the Dark Side and isn’t Darth Christmas. I am. So, prepare to have a red Christmas…” Darth Christmas said as an armour attached to him and made him look like a black HK unit.
The duel went on for a little while. Geyyshhyyk had been previously kicked to the wall by Christmas and he was now shooting at Amber while Ewan was being taken care of by the auto-turrets. Just suddenly, a stray shot hit Amber in the hand, not severing it but knocking her to her back. Darth Christmas stepped up to her and stomped her Staffsaber, crushing it. Then as he was brandishing his Lightsaber, Ewan came jumping in and cut off his weapon hand with a 450º spin on his front. Christmas roared in pain and Ewan then Force Pushed him to a console, which prompted the whole fortress to self-destruct. Geyyshhyyk grabbed Nicolas and Ewan helped Amber up as they made a leap of faith by jumping directly onto the ground below, Ewan breaking their fall by casting a shield of Force. The crew got out of the fortress and entered the speeder and the fortress blew up right as they flew up, prompting the speeder to go directly to the ship’s front.
“Thank you, but, I have a proposition,” Said Santa Claus who had been woken for a few minutes now and had just listened to their story, “Will you help me delivering these presents?”
“Sorry Santa, but we still have got to celebrate Christmas,” Ewan smiled.
“Very well,” Santa said, “Have a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!”
The crew entered The Sky Eagle and flew to Coruscant, where Christmas was hot…
On a building on Coruscant, everybody was partying while Ewan and Amber where both looking at the planet on a window.
“Hey, Amber,” Ewan said, turning to her and taking out a box, opening it, “I want you to have this. This is the first Lightsaber I made, and since yours was destroyed, I’d like you to have this. As your Christmas present.”
Amber took the box and looked at it.
“Why thank you Ewan, you’re so..” She said as she then looked at Ewan and was received with a kiss.
“Mistletoe, Amber. Mistletoe.”
“Well, you’ve certainly learned a lot about Christmas.”
“I sure have.”
The two then kissed again.
Have a Merry Christmas
Happy New Year!