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Old 12-31-2003, 08:15 PM   #1
Orca Wail
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Cool Guy Here we go again... :/

*Looks around*

We can't seem to keep a story for long......

So...

Perhaps we can make one last longer if we have a set of rules!
*is imedatly pelted with dirty looks from all over the globe*

NO SUDDEN ENDINGS
NO ACTING AS SOMEONE ELSE
unless it induces laughter/resembles person's actions
NO MARTHA
NO RIDICULOUS CLAIMS OF POWER
e.i., you cannot suddenly drop a H-bomb, you cannot be Death...(sorry, my friend :P)

:/ ....i see noone jumping to it...i will do it...

The sea was angry, like a nun on Valentine's day. It thrashed and fussed like a baby with a heavy diaper.

The mighty ship, The Sea-Kangaroo , was right in the thick of the storm. Captian Orca WaiL, scrouge of the seas, stood fearlessly at the steering wheel (not a bit of self glorification ).
She wouldn't let down the sails. She was determined to sail thru the storm.

"ARE YOU ON CRACK!!?!?!!!!!1" She heard her first mate scream.

"No," Orca replied over the din . "Chicken."

Her first mate...
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Old 12-31-2003, 11:24 PM   #2
Das Mole
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das mole, who was the captain of the submarine das mole, suddenly jumped down from the crow's nest.

"i'm gonna need a paperweight," he said.

"why?" questioned orca.

"why do you think? i'm trying to do paperwork in the crow's nest of a clipper ship. gimme a break."

"well, we ain't got no paperweights. we're hard-core pirates. you give me a break."

"i'm just trying to organize my competitions for the big brother game. i guess i'll have to go find a paperweight myself."

and with that, das ran off into the hatch leading downstairs. he searched all the through the kitchen and the bedroom and the storage hull, but he couldn't find anything as a paperweight! he ran back up to the crow's nest and sat down on his chair, saying "ow"; he had found something. he stood back up and there was a paperweight!

"oh, hey here's a paperweight!"

meanwhile...the not-so-great chef...(insert name)
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Old 01-03-2004, 05:11 AM   #3
Skinkie
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Skinkie having heard of das's problem decided that he must help him out by finding him a paperweight unknowing that das had already found one. He picked up his largest butcher knife and went off to find the crewman with the largest head, who happened to be....


Just because people think what I say don't make sense, doesn't mean I don't like popsicles.
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Old 01-03-2004, 01:13 PM   #4
DrMcCoy
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DrMcCoy. after a short fight involving an injection, the winner was DrMcCoy (of course...).
But suddenly...
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Old 01-05-2004, 09:50 AM   #5
Ray Jones
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..

ray stepped in, pressed the button and
TUM TUUMMM TUUUMMMMMM!!

..

restarted the whole universe. again.

"WHY, YOU LITTLE CREEPY .. CREEP??" das shouted. shouted? err. yes. shouted. he shouted. "I WAS JUST UP TO KISS MARTHA!!!!!"

so it came that orca showed up, knocked ray down with a iron panty and beamed das with a confusion ray (huh??? ), who turned confused immediatly, so that he passed out.

"i said NO MARTHA!!" then she smiled "you could kiss me instead..", but das was obviously too confused and tried to kiss the power outlet.
bbrrrzzzaaapppp.
"whooaa. what happened?" das was confused again.
At this second ray woke up , stood up and said: "people. i think we have a problem." he made a mean face "the air.. is clammy. again." he explained "and if you would take a look at the compass you may notice that we are directly heading for everyones best friend carl's place landing stage.
someone hacked this course into the boardcomputer and i cant find pete the millipede to fix it. that's why i restarted the universe. but to make it all worse, the button isnt working the way it used to. it 'remembers' the configuration of the universe and after the restart it reconfigures it so everything is like it was before."
ray was curios. he looked at the bottom side of the button and read it aloud "universe restart button 4.3 .. drat. someone updated it. this looks bad. we have to find another button. but where?"
suddenly the phone ringed.
rrrrriiinnggggg. rrriiiinngggggg.
ray answered it. "who is it?" he asked. "who is it there?" was the reply. "HEY!" ray said loud. "OUR phone, WE pay the bills, WE ask the questions here!!" not that he was angry, but he really really hates it if this happens. so he asked again: "who is it?" this time the answer was ..


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Old 01-06-2004, 01:36 AM   #6
Orca Wail
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(RAY! No riduculus claims of power!*smack!* NO UNIVERSE RESTART! If it gets boring...erm...we're doomed... )

(Wait...there's a phone on a pirate clipper ship? WTF? )

...some strange voice. It suddenly got all demonic and backwards and CREEPY.

"Rrraaayyy!Rrrrraaayyy! Its ME!"

"W..Who?"Ray stammered.

"Who do you think?"the evil thing said.

"Some evil demonic force?"

"BESIDES THAT!!!"

"Well..."

Meanwhile, das...
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Old 01-06-2004, 01:49 AM   #7
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Snatched the CELL PHONE out of Ray's sweaty palm. He put it up to his ear, and suddenly his heart went cold. That eerie voice on the other end.. he'd heard it before...
"Alia!" he croaked.
"I know where you are."
"No.. no! please, let me be!" cried Das
"You didn't listen last time, now you and you shipmates will have to pay. I'm suprised you haven't noticed that the rest of your crew's life is on the line" said Alia from behind him, snatching the phone and throwing it overboard.
Das looked around, and saw that all of his friends were being held by Alia's evil crew, katanas at their throats.
"Say good bye Das" cackled Shivers
But then...


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Old 01-06-2004, 08:40 PM   #8
Ray Jones
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(claims of power?? claims o power????? .. i just pressed a button..
*presses button* .. *dark* .. drat. that was the light. )

(of course there is a phone.. there is also a phone in the jungle. i mean .. tsk..)


..ray can free one of his hand and presses the button. a deep darkness fell over the scene. "damn, i catched the light!" ray thought.. but then he had an idea. "NOW DAS!!" he yelled. against all his usualnesses das didnt reacted confused to this command and quickly pulled out a clove of garlic and ate it. then he draw a deep breath and aspirated to alia's evil crewmanship. ray thought "crap. i should have warned the others." but it was too late. everybody on the ship had passed out, except for das and ray. "what now?" das asked. "stop breathing so i can!" moaned ray. then he added "lets stand back on back so that we can talk without the danger of melting my lung!"
so they stood, back on back to have a save conversation about how they gonna wake up their fellow crew to get rid of alia's evil crew and take alia for hostage and/or invite for a big breakfast with ham and eggs, croissants, marmelade and a big glass of chocolate milk. this was the first time in ray's life he didnt take any notice of the fact that the air was clammy. still.
"hey!" threw das suddenly in ..


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Old 01-19-2004, 09:05 PM   #9
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[edit ]

what is it?


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Old 01-20-2004, 02:09 PM   #10
Das Mole
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"i think i know how to unclammify the air!"

"really?"

"no."

"you suck, das." stated ray.

"hi." replied das.

"well, it looks like i'm in this thing by myself. i'm going to have to find a way to get us back to-"

"monkey island!"

"no, not monkey island..."said ray, "but instead, we're going to find atlantis!"

"hoorya!" said das. [yes, that was a typo, but i'm deciding to keep it like that.]

"let's go."

"but isn't atlantis underwater?" asked das.

"damn. you're right."

"don't worry!" and das pulled out a little remote thing. "wait for just a minute." and they waited. for a minute. "ah! here it comes!" said das.

"what's coming?"

and at that moment, a gigantic submarine surfaced right next to the boat. "my submarine!"

"hoorya!"

"now we just have to get everyone in there. we'll use the lifeboats."

a few minutes later, everyone was inside the submarine and they set course for atlantis.

meanwhile...
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Old 12-11-2004, 09:11 AM   #11
DarthTDe
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DarthTDe surfaced and ran into the Orcawail's ship,and readied a big timeporter thing!*DUNDUNDUUUUUUUUUNNNNNN!*but then he dropped the timeporter in the water.and it fell to...


Go ahead. Impress me. Do something intelligent.
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Old 12-13-2004, 10:26 AM   #12
PoM
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...The bottom of the ocean.
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Old 12-13-2004, 02:16 PM   #13
DarthTDe
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(DUH!)


Go ahead. Impress me. Do something intelligent.
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