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Old 09-18-2004, 02:21 PM   #1
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Post The "One post story" thread. It's great!

This a great game that I posted ages ago once as pHILBRUSH.
Right, It goes like this:
*Ahem*

One person says one word, then a next says another ect. ect.
BUT, every three posts, we keep track, like so; {first dude} there.
{other dude}was. {next dude} a. *two spaces down* STORY SO FAR: one there was a _____________________________
Get it? Then I shall begin: Once...
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Old 09-28-2004, 02:19 AM   #2
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don't do a 'one word' one, they take forever to get anywhere and people lost interest to quickly. do a one or two line one. people can be more creative with that.

i'll start...


Out of the darkness he saw the little flash of light. That was the sign. He thumbed the safety catch off… it was now or never.
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Old 09-28-2004, 04:58 AM   #3
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He rethumbed the safety catch on, deciding that he could never do it. Not ever.

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Old 09-28-2004, 05:48 AM   #4
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Post

His hands began to shake and he started to sweat uncontrollably. He knew that by giving up without a fight, they would win.
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Old 09-28-2004, 07:50 AM   #5
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Post

But, he stuck by his first decision and went off too eat a burger instead, but little did he know that...
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Old 09-29-2004, 03:50 AM   #6
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... the burger had been exposed to gamma rays and toxic waste, mutating it into a grotesque psychotic meaty monster.
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Old 09-29-2004, 05:11 AM   #7
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"Do I get fries with this?" he muttered under his breath, once again releasing the safety catch on his... wait, that's not a gun. Who puts a safety catch on a toothbrush?

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Old 09-30-2004, 10:02 AM   #8
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He tried to brush, wondering why the safety catch was there... BAM! er... nothing. He later found that the safety catch was merely a piece of meat
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Old 10-04-2004, 02:28 AM   #9
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Armed with just a safety catch-less toothbrush, he prepared himself for battle with the mutated burger monster. Suddenly a thought came to him. what he needed was a
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Old 10-04-2004, 02:29 AM   #10
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person who could help him defeat the monster. So he asked the person next to him to help him. They then


Sig encountering technical difficulties...
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Old 10-04-2004, 02:47 AM   #11
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Well, someone should do a story so far thing.

Ahem...
STORY SO FAR!
Out of the darkness he saw the little flash of light. That was the sign. He thumbed the safety catch off… it was now or never.

He rethumbed the safety catch on, deciding that he could never do it. Not ever.

His hands began to shake and he started to sweat uncontrollably. He knew that by giving up without a fight, they would win.

But, he stuck by his first decision and went off too eat a burger instead, but little did he know that...

... the burger had been exposed to gamma rays and toxic waste, mutating it into a grotesque psychotic meaty monster.

"Do I get fries with this?" he muttered under his breath, once again releasing the safety catch on his... wait, that's not a gun. Who puts a safety catch on a toothbrush?

He tried to brush, wondering why the safety catch was there... BAM! er... nothing. He later found that the safety catch was merely a piece of meat

Armed with just a safety catch-less toothbrush, he prepared himself for battle with the mutated burger monster. Suddenly a thought came to him. what he needed was a

person who could help him defeat the monster. So he asked the person next to him to help him. They then...


and now my contribution

...flew into action, but accidentaly hit a wall because the universe seems to also have a sense of humour. But the wall wasn't a wall, but actually turned out to be...

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Old 10-04-2004, 03:25 AM   #12
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marzipan. "what the hell is going on??!" shouted the man in frustration. little did he know that things were about to get weirder...
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Old 10-07-2004, 02:16 PM   #13
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when the hambuger monster sperated and made two. He got up after the 1st hambuger monster blew him down...........


Sig encountering technical difficulties...
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Old 10-12-2004, 12:08 PM   #14
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wait he thought to himself, I've still got to do the thing that sivy ahem, uh I had came for in the begining. The burgers backed away knowing that this was important. "Grandma, he said " I'm a --...
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Old 10-13-2004, 01:02 AM   #15
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"i'm in love with oddly shaped fruit and that’s why grandpa got suckered into this. but don't worry, i'll get him out! no mutant burgers are going to stop me!" he then picked his up toothbrush and left.
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Old 10-13-2004, 01:03 PM   #16
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Our young hero, Ick Van Shneidenheid II, was off to his best freind's house, he had a carboot sale there and had heard that there were som Geeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrate toothbrushes there, so he bought the laser sonicare one for £250 (yeah, ££££!!!) and went to Manbroom lambbad to talk about the...
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Old 11-11-2004, 11:44 AM   #17
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...one thing that could probably kill a fuc..... coff coff ...mutating hamburger....(drum rolls)....THE ZEROFASCINATIONINSTATION 5000 whith safety thingy et all. This weapon was devised by the master minds of the CIA, for the attack of the mutant lobsters in the Vegas sub and....
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Old 11-12-2004, 08:33 AM   #18
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....university of Liverpool which are currently updating the ad shown in....
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Old 11-12-2004, 09:27 AM   #19
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L.A. The Person who selled this to our hero was a person whom knowledge of the secret matters were very well known to him, like the flying bicycles that the bushadmnistration is trying to invent or the sub-narotiomanism system that nobody knows what the fu it is!
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Old 11-12-2004, 11:08 AM   #20
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Ick Van Shneidenheid II then went off to blockbusters to buy porn porn. Damn, I mean er... sex videos. NO, erm, Die Hard, yeah he rented Die Hard he kept it under his bed because...
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Old 11-12-2004, 02:10 PM   #21
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at the middle of the night he had the urge to watch Bruce Willis's tight arse. Then he kept the lethal weapon that could kill mutating Hamburgers under his bed also because tomorrow he would be hunting them!So when he fell asleep he dreamt of....
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Old 11-13-2004, 08:32 AM   #22
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...Brucee's lap dancing skills in a room surrounded by red velvet curtains. He woke up not only to realize that baby oil has a new use, but also...
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Old 11-14-2004, 06:35 AM   #23
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That it was already noon. So he picked up the lethal weapon that could kill Mutant Burgers an went out for the hunt. He started ....
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Old 11-14-2004, 11:03 AM   #24
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okay, not for a while. Here goes.

STORY SO FAR!
Out of the darkness he saw the little flash of light. That was the sign. He thumbed the safety catch off… it was now or never.

He rethumbed the safety catch on, deciding that he could never do it. Not ever.

His hands began to shake and he started to sweat uncontrollably. He knew that by giving up without a fight, they would win.

But, he stuck by his first decision and went off too eat a burger instead, but little did he know that...

... the burger had been exposed to gamma rays and toxic waste, mutating it into a grotesque psychotic meaty monster.

"Do I get fries with this?" he muttered under his breath, once again releasing the safety catch on his... wait, that's not a gun. Who puts a safety catch on a toothbrush?

He tried to brush, wondering why the safety catch was there... BAM! er... nothing. He later found that the safety catch was merely a piece of meat

Armed with just a safety catch-less toothbrush, he prepared himself for battle with the mutated burger monster. Suddenly a thought came to him. what he needed was a

person who could help him defeat the monster. So he asked the person next to him to help him. They then...

...flew into action, but accidentaly hit a wall because the universe seems to also have a sense of humour. But the wall wasn't a wall, but actually turned out to be...
marzipan. "what the hell is going on??!" shouted the man in frustration. little did he know that things were about to get weirder...
when the hambuger monster sperated and made two. He got up after the 1st hambuger monster blew him down...........

wait he thought to himself, I've still got to do the thing that sivy ahem, uh I had came for in the begining. The burgers backed away knowing that this was important. "Grandma, he said " I'm a --...
"i'm in love with oddly shaped fruit and that’s why grandpa got suckered into this. but don't worry, i'll get him out! no mutant burgers are going to stop me!" he then picked his up toothbrush and left.
Our young hero, Ick Van Shneidenheid II, was off to his best freind's house, he had a carboot sale there and had heard that there were som Geeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrate toothbrushes there, so he bought the laser sonicare one for £250 (yeah, ££££!!!) and went to Manbroom lambbad to talk about the...
...one thing that could probably kill a fuc..... coff coff ...mutating hamburger....(drum rolls)....THE ZEROFASCINATIONINSTATION 5000 whith safety thingy et all. This weapon was devised by the master minds of the CIA, for the attack of the mutant lobsters in the Vegas sub and....
....university of Liverpool which are currently updating the ad shown in....
L.A. The Person who selled this to our hero was a person whom knowledge of the secret matters were very well known to him, like the flying bicycles that the bushadmnistration is trying to invent or the sub-narotiomanism system that nobody knows what the fu it is!
Ick Van Shneidenheid II then went off to blockbusters to buy porn porn. Damn, I mean er... sex videos. NO, erm, Die Hard, yeah he rented Die Hard he kept it under his bed because...
at the middle of the night he had the urge to watch Bruce Willis's tight arse. Then he kept the lethal weapon that could kill mutating Hamburgers under his bed also because tomorrow he would be hunting them!So when he fell asleep he dreamt of....
...Brucee's lap dancing skills in a room surrounded by red velvet curtains. He woke up not only to realize that baby oil has a new use, but also...
That it was already noon. So he picked up the lethal weapon that could kill Mutant Burgers an went out for the hunt. He started ....


my part:

...scratching his arse cause he'd layed on a nail, then went out to kill the hamburgers by...

Last edited by Fealiks; 11-14-2004 at 11:16 AM.
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Old 11-14-2004, 11:39 AM   #25
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his new scooter. He drove to the place where had first met them. He now only wanted to kill him. Hot sweat drip from his forhead, pee almost bursting from his blader, **** almost coming out of his anus, he would probably faint...butno he endured. he entered the place and saw that it was full of a gooey stuff probably made by the burgers. The smell was horrible...it smelled like rotten whip cream and eggs...oh wait that's just our hero who just made a lil poopoo on his pants...damn...
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Old 11-15-2004, 01:44 PM   #26
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He awoke with a start. He got up, looking around him. It had just been a dream. But why was he in the middle of the road? It all came back. The Burgers. The toothbrush. The scooter. The mission. His poor grandpa. He looked around, and noticed his scooter nearby."I must have been knocked off it by that..." A phesent roosted in the middle of the road. This was no ordinary phesent, he realized...

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Old 11-17-2004, 01:53 AM   #27
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that he did not know what was phesent.So then he got up but he hit his knew on a hydrant, and it hurt alot, so he couldn't stop saying: ''**** ME, MOTHEER ****ER, THIS SHT!!! DAMN, GO **** UR GRANDMA, MOTHER ****ER, **** OFF...AH!''
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Old 11-18-2004, 11:14 AM   #28
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...Is what he would have said, had he not been a civilized person. which he wasn't.''**** ME, MOTHEER ****ER, THIS SHT!!! DAMN, GO **** UR GRANDMA, MOTHER ****ER, **** OFF...AH!'' he rambled on, kicking the phesant, who then explained what one is. Apparently, it's a...
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Old 12-06-2004, 12:13 PM   #29
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SUDENLY he awoke again in bed, an thqat phesents don't ****ing exist. And then he thoght about deviding his 2 dvd of porn with his roomy but then discovered that 2 can't be devided.
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Old 12-07-2004, 12:02 PM   #30
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then took a lesson in basic maths, and found it can be divided to 1. SUDDENALEE
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Old 12-10-2004, 02:35 PM   #31
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A crazed Kermit the Frog clone ran in and pulled out...


Go ahead. Impress me. Do something intelligent.
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Old 12-16-2004, 09:52 AM   #32
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But then he descovered that it was just an ilusion created by what he was taking: L.S.D. Of course he just descovered this when he woke up next morning whith an old hag naked on his bed and no condom was found. So remmember lads safe sex.
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Old 12-17-2004, 02:29 PM   #33
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"get the heck out of my home!"He yells.But then...


Go ahead. Impress me. Do something intelligent.
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:28 PM   #34
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But then he looks at the middle part of the old hag and sees...OMG...a penis! And feels a slight tweeching in his arse. And he yells: "FOR ****'s SAKES!!!'' Then starts vomiting alover the his bed because he noticed that the hag WAS dead. ''Oh, no" says he ''If someone knows about this i'll be called a necrophile or what the ****'s it called''. He pinched himself and saw that wasn't a dream, and then he cut a bit of meat from his arm and still IT wasn't a dream. It isn't a ****ing dreAM . WHAT will our main character do to kill the mutant burger and get himself rid of this dead transexual hag that lying on his bed? OR is it possible that the burger was just another ilusion created by the acuds he is consuming?????
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Old 01-06-2005, 05:10 AM   #35
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Suddenly, his prized guava/eggplant hybrid rolled out from his robes and fell to the hard floor.

*plouch*

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

While he greived for his guava/eggplant hybrid, the Burger grabbed him and chucked him through the roof, into the attic. He stumbled around, but then he noticed, in a dusty corner, an axe...

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Old 01-06-2005, 04:35 PM   #36
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He ran to the corner and picked it up,but then it fell through the floor...


Go ahead. Impress me. Do something intelligent.
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Old 01-07-2005, 06:05 AM   #37
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He jumped after.
But little did he know that there was nothing else than the second part of the mutated hamburger and the axe.
He grabbed the axe, but then threw it at the burger, because he didn't need it.
So he grabbed the ZERO-FASCINATION-IN-STATION-5000 and...
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Old 08-01-2005, 06:36 PM   #38
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woke up again. "Oh for god's sake! when will i be properly awake? He got up, put the dog back on the floor and got dressed. He then went out his house and decided to...


IM NOT GOING TO BE ON THE FORUMS VERY OFTEN NOW! I MIGHT BE ON TIME TO TIME, BUT IVE BASICLY GIVEN UP THE FORUMS NOW!!!!

bye all

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Old 08-01-2005, 07:43 PM   #39
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get laid, because he would probably die in the fight between him and the burger. He went to a bordello, but noticed he didn't have enough money...so he had to make it with an old prostitute that worked in the streets, that had scabs evrywhere...EVERYWHERE. Oh god...That hurt but after awhile it smoothed. Then he went to find the burger. He entered...
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Old 08-02-2005, 04:34 PM   #40
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a trance. He wanted to know where the burger was - it would have got half the way around the city by now. So he used his mystical powers to work out that the burger was ...


IM NOT GOING TO BE ON THE FORUMS VERY OFTEN NOW! I MIGHT BE ON TIME TO TIME, BUT IVE BASICLY GIVEN UP THE FORUMS NOW!!!!

bye all

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