lfnetwork.com mark read register faq members calendar

Thread: Martha Stewart XXX videos on E-Bay
Thread Tools Display Modes
Post a new thread. Add a reply to this thread. Indicate all threads in this forum as read. Subscribe to this forum. RSS feed: this forum RSS feed: all forums
Old 05-28-2004, 03:38 AM   #1
Zoom Rabbit
Trekkie
 
Zoom Rabbit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: 1123.6526.5321
Posts: 3,288
Current Game: Tsuji-giri
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Exclamation Martha Stewart XXX videos on E-Bay

No.

Skinkie: One of your kind has gotten loose in the house, and I need you to talk reason to it.

Today I was reading, and happened to glance up just in time to see a little six-inch lizard walk across the floor. 'Oh great,' I said, 'there's a lizard in the house!' The creature stopped, turned and looked up at me with unhastened deliberation. It fixed me with a curious expression that seemed to say:

'I, sir, am not a common, frenetic lizard. I am a skink, which is an altogether more evolved family of reptiles with roots far back in ancient prehistory. Consider me an augury of good fortune.'

As I tried to capture the strange little lizard, which evaded me unhurriedly, it wisely found its way into the Forgotten Room, where the messy things are. No hope of catching the stowaway today, I said, 'Fine! My two kitties will probably find you next time anyway.'

So. The liz--excuse me, skink is pretty much doomed if it continues living in my house. Plenty of bugs come in because of the black light, so it could in theory find food to eat...but if it comes out to hunt, one of my cats will pounce on it with irony.

What should I tell it?
Zoom Rabbit is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-28-2004, 06:23 AM   #2
Dr Edison 007
Forumite
 
Dr Edison 007's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Freedonia
Posts: 625
Tell it that if it doesn't leave it has no chance of being your best friend....EVER.


We're not gay, but we ARE willing to learn.
Dr Edison 007 is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-28-2004, 06:45 AM   #3
Sivy
coming soon
 
Sivy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Posts: 7,314
Forum Veteran 
firstly you need to entice it out with seductive dancing and some easy-listening (e.g something like Moon River, You're the best thing... anything but crowded house's weather with you, he'll think you're taking the piss)
then all you need is a trail of rose petals leading out the front door. give him your bedroom eye's and then slowly make you way towards the door. if he doesn't follow you then let your cats eat him.
Sivy is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-28-2004, 08:15 PM   #4
toenail1
Junior Member
 
toenail1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 479
well... if its anything like skinkie it should like popsicles


Cellar door
toenail1 is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-28-2004, 08:24 PM   #5
Zoom Rabbit
Trekkie
 
Zoom Rabbit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: 1123.6526.5321
Posts: 3,288
Current Game: Tsuji-giri
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Lightbulb Gravity

It occurs to me that I could put my blacklight on the ceiling. The bugs would go there, and so would the lizard...but my cats would be unable to resist the earth's pull enough to pounce on him. Also, I could catch him with a bucket.

My only concern is: can a skink crawl on the ceiling? I think geckoes can, but what about skinks...?

Siv: Perhaps, but that approach didn't help me get Madonna out of my house. They're always too smart for that.
Zoom Rabbit is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-28-2004, 10:38 PM   #6
Skinkie
Definately, Maybe
 
Skinkie's Avatar
 
Status: Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Eh, Wherever
Posts: 2,438
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Re: Gravity

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit

My only concern is: can a skink crawl on the ceiling? I think geckoes can, but what about skinks...?
Sounds like you need to do some research on these fine creatures. Make sure nothing kills it, I'm pretty sure it would anger me.


Just because people think what I say don't make sense, doesn't mean I don't like popsicles.
Skinkie is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-29-2004, 02:49 AM   #7
SyntheticGerbil
Pasta Master
 
SyntheticGerbil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Underwater
Posts: 2,241
Man, **** ****.
SyntheticGerbil is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-29-2004, 02:50 AM   #8
Ray Jones
[armleglegarmhead]
 
Ray Jones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: digital
Posts: 8,250
10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! Forum Veteran 
are you sure it is a skink? in case it is a newt you may have flushed him already through your toilet and he might return as giant blue newt talking weeeeiiiiiirrd stuff.


Ray Jones is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-29-2004, 11:45 AM   #9
edlib
Close to the Edge
 
edlib's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Boston, MA., USA
Posts: 9,390
Current Game: DiRT 3; Forza 4
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Re: Re: Gravity

Quote:
Originally posted by Skinkie
research
That's a whole lotta skinks!


Native XWA.Netter (Nutter?)
edlib is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-29-2004, 10:29 PM   #10
Zoom Rabbit
Trekkie
 
Zoom Rabbit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: 1123.6526.5321
Posts: 3,288
Current Game: Tsuji-giri
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Cool Guy Electric blue dancing plasma dolphin

Sadly, those are all australian skinks, and my house guest wandered in from the grassy mountain valleys of Oregon. Now I'm presented not only with the question, 'Can skinks walk on the ceiling?' but also, 'Can skinks surf across the Pacific ocean?'

My cognac is disappearing, and my stash has been raided. Someone put the nature channel on while I was at work. It seems now that not only is the lizard still alive, but it's corrupted my kitties. This is getting out of control.
Zoom Rabbit is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-29-2004, 11:14 PM   #11
Skinkie
Definately, Maybe
 
Skinkie's Avatar
 
Status: Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Eh, Wherever
Posts: 2,438
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Re: Electric blue dancing plasma dolphin

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit
Sadly, those are all australian skinks, and my house guest wandered in from the grassy mountain valleys of Oregon. Now I'm presented not only with the question, 'Can skinks walk on the ceiling?' but also, 'Can skinks surf across the Pacific ocean?'
Hey I just typed skinks into Yahoo, that's only the begining of the knowledge out there, the rest is up to you.


Just because people think what I say don't make sense, doesn't mean I don't like popsicles.
Skinkie is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-30-2004, 01:52 PM   #12
Zoom Rabbit
Trekkie
 
Zoom Rabbit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: 1123.6526.5321
Posts: 3,288
Current Game: Tsuji-giri
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Arrow Cuidado

I'll say!



These critters appear to have a dangerous side...
Zoom Rabbit is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-31-2004, 05:53 PM   #13
Ray Jones
[armleglegarmhead]
 
Ray Jones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: digital
Posts: 8,250
10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! Forum Veteran 
he'll need a large toothpick for that.


Ray Jones is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-31-2004, 10:48 PM   #14
Zoom Rabbit
Trekkie
 
Zoom Rabbit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: 1123.6526.5321
Posts: 3,288
Current Game: Tsuji-giri
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Cool Guy Zoo show

This one has a blue tongue...



This one looks evil! What the hell, a voodoo skink?



And this skink is packing. Skinks for victory!



Google knows everything. Except for where that damn lizard is hiding in my house. I tried searching under skink, zoom's house and where the hell?, but the great google has more important things to do than figure out my vermin problems for me.

I'm going to try playing Paul Mc Cartney and the Wings and see if that doesn't flush it out. I have no idea why that would work, but I'll try it anyway.
Zoom Rabbit is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 06-01-2004, 12:35 AM   #15
Skinkie
Definately, Maybe
 
Skinkie's Avatar
 
Status: Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Eh, Wherever
Posts: 2,438
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
I like the voodoo one, I think he's cute.


Just because people think what I say don't make sense, doesn't mean I don't like popsicles.
Skinkie is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 06-01-2004, 06:53 PM   #16
Zoom Rabbit
Trekkie
 
Zoom Rabbit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: 1123.6526.5321
Posts: 3,288
Current Game: Tsuji-giri
10 year veteran! Forum Veteran 
Post Hey look--they're dancing!

The voodoo skink thinks you're cute, too, and wonders if you like to eat fat, yummy bugs.

When I asked Google what a 'cute skink' would look like, it showed me this picture of two lizards:



What the hell?!?
Zoom Rabbit is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 06-01-2004, 08:24 PM   #17
toenail1
Junior Member
 
toenail1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 479
Re: Hey look--they're dancing!

Quote:
Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit
The voodoo skink thinks you're cute, too, and wonders if you like to eat fat, yummy bugs.

i think that that answer is quite obvious...


Cellar door
toenail1 is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 06-30-2006, 09:59 AM   #18
Ray Jones
[armleglegarmhead]
 
Ray Jones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: digital
Posts: 8,250
10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! Forum Veteran 
I'm not so sure about that. Man, and I had a weird dream last night. That skink in Zoom's Forgotten room, managed to create offspring by making lizard lurve to his cats.

Zoom appears now to be in serious trouble, having to fight back hundreds of deadly dangerous skats, who already occupied his computer room and also the klingon slave girl lounge!


Ray Jones is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-02-2006, 09:43 PM   #19
Det. Bart Lasiter
obama.png
 
Det. Bart Lasiter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: `(.)~
Posts: 7,997
Current Game: all
Forum Veteran LF Jester 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ray G. Jones
I'm not so sure about that. Man, and I had a weird dream last night. That skink in Zoom's Forgotten room, managed to create offspring by making lizard lurve to his cats.

Zoom appears now to be in serious trouble, having to fight back hundreds of deadly dangerous skats, who already occupied his computer room and also the klingon slave girl lounge!
VIP QUALITY!


Unfortunately, it's like 2 years late.



"No, Mama. You can bet your sweet ass and half a titty whoever put that hit on you already got the cops in their back pocket." ~Black Dynamite
Det. Bart Lasiter is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-03-2006, 08:10 AM   #20
Ray Jones
[armleglegarmhead]
 
Ray Jones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: digital
Posts: 8,250
10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! Forum Veteran 
No, no. You seem not to understand. Zoom's living in a part of our dimension where time is not of importance. Santa must've send that skink, a putative innocent and harmless creature, to infiltrate and entamer my little fluffy friend and to capture his home. Why? Because he *is* the easter bunny, given pure wisdom and the omnipotent power of friendship!! He *must* be in real danger and thus is hiding in his secret room behind the fridge, wrapped up in thin foil, otherwise he would, without doubt, have send Wally the space dolphin with a ciphered message to call for help.

This is his last appearance, it's still unclear if there's already some coded message to be found in it:

Quote:


Wally the space dolphin has been caught completely unprepared for a contingency plan B since he was supposed to deal with plans E and S, and vaguely recalls a nervous looking eskimo man at the conference meeting who was supposed to be the plan B guy. Wally says get off his back--he's just a mid-level manager, and is really the most powerless guy in the whole structure with bosses above and below, not one of whom had the merest flicker of insight that he--a space dolphin--who was thoroughly trained and briefed in preparation for two other plans, would be expected to deliver the goods to an auditorium full of stern shareholders who fully intended to hear from him the details of plan freaking B. So:

Plan B: What do you want from me? I'm a space dolphin!

Plan E: Switch Laura Bush with Jane Fonda in the middle of the night and take pictures of the surprised president's face the next morning.

Plan S: Tweak the laws of fluid dynamics so that water will run uphill.


Ray Jones is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-04-2006, 06:11 AM   #21
itchythesamurai
Not Ichi the Killer
 
itchythesamurai's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Kashyyyk, Texas
Posts: 2,868
LFN Staff Member 
Man, this thread got my hopes up.

itchythesamurai is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-05-2006, 07:02 AM   #22
Ray Jones
[armleglegarmhead]
 
Ray Jones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: digital
Posts: 8,250
10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! Forum Veteran 
Hope dies last, that's why I decided to enter a thread titled "Martha Stewart XXX videos on E-Bay" in the first place.


Ray Jones is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Post a new thread. Add a reply to this thread. Indicate all threads in this forum as read. Subscribe to this forum. RSS feed: this forum RSS feed: all forums
Go Back   LucasForums > Network > Sam And Max.Net > Sam & Max Discussion > Anything & Everything > Martha Stewart XXX videos on E-Bay

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:54 PM.

LFNetwork, LLC ©2002-2011 - All rights reserved.
Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.