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Old 12-15-2008, 11:29 AM   #1
LordOfTheFish
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The End of the Beginning.

“Kill him! Make him pay for what he’s done! Fred was my friend, he’s a good man, he’s as sane as any of us… Except him, the Batman…” The crowd had yelled…


~~~~~~~~

Arkham Asylum: Cell # 1139

Name: Wayne, Bruce

Crime: Murder….
________________________

I had one rule… To not kill… So I thought… Bruce Wayne stared at the grey stone floor of Arkham Asylum. He’d put countless criminals and psychos here, to sit and rot. And now, he would share they’re same fate. He had been sentenced, by the judge, to a public hanging. Waiting was all he could do, waiting for death…

I sat up on my bed feeling lifeless. Arkham was cold, damp, and smelly. The horrible odor of feces and urine was enough to make me vomit, if I had had any food in my stomach. I knew in my heart I didn’t deserve this. Maybe serving time in a jail wouldn’t have been so bad. But to sit here in a insane asylum, and to listen to those blood curdling screams was pure torture.

“So, what are you in for?” My cell mate asked, staring at me from darkness. His eyes almost yellow.

“…Murder…” That word haunted my dreams.

“Murder,” He laughed “I’m in here because I assassinated you friend, Commissioner Gordon.”

“Gordon? When…?”

“Just yesterday. They threw me in here last night. You were asleep.”

“You… killed him?”

“Yeah, I was hired.”

“Hired by who?”

“Eh, why do you care? Besides, he’d kill me, even if I’m in here.”

“Tell me now.” I said and held him against the wall by the collar.

“Ok, ok. Take it easy guy.” The man looked around the room, frightened. “It was that crazy guy… You know, the one with the green hair. I forget his name I’m um, not that bright you see.” I stared blankly at him. How could anyone, forget his name…

“His name is… the Joker, craziest man in all of Gotham City. I tried for years to through him in jail… But he always escaped. He had no purpose, nor did his crimes… Some men, just want to watch the world burn…” My cell mate laughed.

“I had no purpose either. But I didn’t have much of a life anyways. A life of crime seemed to be the only way to go, for me at least. Then you got people like you, billionaires. Why do you do what you do?” The man laughed again. “My bad, why did you do what you did?”

“Please, don’t anger me, I’m tired.”

“Alright. Just tell me one last thing, before you go. Why’d you kill him…?” The nausea returned at the question. He began to look me in the eye and grit his teeth. “Why! Why'd you kill him! What did he do to you…?!” The man stood up and walked over to me, and repeated the question. When I refused to answer he punched me in the gut.

“What’s it to you, scum?” I said filled with anger.

“Because, he was my brother….” He punched me again. I lent over the side of my cot and threw up the last of my lunch of bread and slop. As I sat back up and wiped my mouth we met eyes again.

“Do you really want to know.” I stood up revealing my size over him. Tears filled his eyes.

“Yeah, man, I do… I want to know what happened. They’re going to kill me too, you see. And I just wanted to know what my sweet little brother could have possibly done to deserve death.” I smiled and leaned against the wall, my back facing him.

“Your brother, was hardly sweet…” The flash backs of that horrid night filled my head. “ Your brother, killed my butler, Alfred. He was family to me. The only person who stuck by me after the death of my parents. I once asked him, You still haven’t given up on me, have you Alfred. He replied, No, and I never will. That man meant the world to me. So, out of my anger I went after your brother, not intending to kill him. It’s just… when I found him he ran. I chased him up the stairways of a building until we reached the roof top. There was this board leading across to another building. He ran onto it and stopped in the middle. I remember him laughing and saying I don’t think this board will hold the both us. Can’t you see I’ve won! I’ve beat the Batman! He hopped around, taunting me. When he proceeded to cross the rest of the board he slipped… And fell. I didn’t actually kill him. I just didn’t think anyone would believe me…” The man begin to cry. He approached me, bringing his knee into my back, knocking me to the ground.

“Liar! My brother was a good kid. He did his homework, went to college, he was the perfect son, unlike his piece of dirt brother...” I stood up, looked him straight into the eye. I could see fear, cowering behind what pretended to be tough. I landed a solid blow right under his chin, sending rolling backwards into the wall.

“Believe what you want. It makes no difference to me, or anyone else. We’re both going to die anyway.”

“Your not lying, are you..?”

“I’m afraid not.” A guard approached our cell at that moment. He threw my costume onto my lap.

“The Judge wants you to where this during your, ah, execution. I’ll give you a minute to put it on, than it’s go time.” Disgusted at the idea, I slipped into my costume for the last time. I looked at my cell mate and said.

“Look, I’m sorry about your brother, but what’s done is done. I’ve learned in the past that letting loved ones go isn’t easy, but in the end you’ll be happy.”

“Maybe for some people, Batman, but I aint got no time left in this wretched life of mine. They’re going to kill me with one of those sleeping pills they kill the crazies with tomorrow afternoon.” He began to weep again as the guard reappeared.

“Time to go Bat freak.” He handcuffed me, and I took my final walk, down the halls of Arkham…

*****

The noose wore tight around my neck, rubbing my flesh raw. The crowd yelled and teased me, spewing their venom. I thought they appreciated what I did. Looking down, I saw faces, many faces which I had saved from death, and this was how they repaid me. All that, mattered nothing now… The judge appeared.

“Batman. Long have you tortured Gotham City with your evil deeds. Today, we change that! Your story will now become no more than a fairy tale. I’ll allow you your last words, Bruce Wayne.” That’s when it hit me. My identity was no longer a secret. The whole word now knew the face of Batman. I seemed to have no point in living.

“I have no last words, your honor, or regrets.”

“You are a fool, Bruce, just like your father.”

“My father, helped keep this city from crumbling. He was a great man, one of the greatest Gotham has ever known, and ever will.”

“Enough! It’s bold of you to challenge me, Batman. But how bold are you when your hanging, dead! Pull the rope, now!” For sure, it was my time… I thought. A man appeared bandaged in a wheel chair.

“Your honor, I here by object this act of so called ‘law’.”

“Who dares…” The judge turn around stunned to see who appeared in front of him. “Gordon,” He laughed “aren’t you suppose to be dead?”

“Shut your mouth, Ronald, your going to need it in court.”
“Court? I am the court, Gordon, stop teasing me. On with the execution.”

“Stop! Don’t pull that rope, or you’ll end up with a not so different fate. Batman, you’ve long been my friend, and many time you’ve saved my life. Now, I’m here to repay that debt.” He looked me into the eyes, and smiled. I said.

“Gordon? I thought you were dead.”

“Ha, I was for a minute. Your cell mate said he assassinated me, which is only partly true. I was hit by his bullet in several places, but it only missed my heart by a fraction of an inch. So, I stand here today with good news to me and only a few others.” He removed a piece of paper from his coat pocket, and put on his glasses. “I have here a legal document stating that hanging, was banned only a few months ago. Signed by the President himself. It also states that anyone who breaks this law, is here by sentenced to life in prison. This document was shown only to Judge Ronald Bacon, who hid it in fear that his dream, to publicly hang the Batman, would be impossible. So, with that being said, I here by place you under arrest.” The Judge didn’t speak for a few seconds, obviously amazed at what was happening. He then laughed for what seemed to be forever.

“That’s absolutely nonsense! You cant prove it, Batman’s mine, Gordon, get lost.”

“Read it yourself.” Gordon threw the paper at the Judge. I could tell by the look on his face, it was over. “Arrest him!”

“Wait! You cant do this!”

“It has nothing to do with us, but everything to do with the law.” As they dragged the judge off, Gordon wheeled his way up the ramp to where I was almost hanging.

“Gordon, I don’t know how I could possibly ever thank you.”

“Oh, that won’t be necessary. It’s not like you’ve never saved my skin.” He smiled again and removed the noose and hand cuffs. “So, are you going to mysteriously disappear again?”

“I’m afraid that's what I do, old friend. I will take you out for coffee sometime.”

“Sounds good to me, as long as there will be doughnuts.”


END

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Old 12-21-2008, 11:02 PM   #2
Chevron 7 locke
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This story was a bit confusing. it was well written but the plot seemed a bit confusing
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Old 12-22-2008, 01:46 AM   #3
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Ehhh...this doesn't make sense. Batman would never let himself get caught and stuck in the asylum.

Also, it was very, very choppy. And I don't think Bruce would just start 'fessing up to a criminal who killed his friend. He also wouldn't let anyone punch him and kick him like that.
None of the characters sound like themselves. Lastly, Gordon wouldn't be up and about if a bullet just missed his heart.

One more thing (sorry, forgot to put it in the last post, no edit button :/). This doesn't fit the topic, and it's not Star Wars. I was under the impression that it had to be Star Wars to be eligible.

Merged!


Chapter 12 of A Soul Adrift is out.

Short stories:
T'katlu: On the planet Felucia, a young apprentice of the Dark Side thinks back to the beginning of her training as she lies in wait for her prey...

All the Time: After four years in the Unknown Regions, the Exile returns to the known galaxy to visit an old enemy.

Broken: A master of the Dark Side finds himself about to lose the one thing he cares about--and he will do anything to stop her from endangering herself.

Last edited by Bee Hoon; 12-23-2008 at 10:54 AM.
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Old 12-23-2008, 11:06 AM   #4
Bee Hoon
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Endorenna is correct, our rules state that we require Star Wars fics. And now I see why you said it didn't fit the topic! If you like, I can move it to the main forum, as it is ineligible:P But anyway:P

Quote:
Originally Posted by LordOfTheFish
Bruce Wayne stared at the grey stone floor of Arkham Asylum. He’d put countless criminals and psychos here, to sit and rot. And now, he would share they’re same fate. He had been sentenced, by the judge, to a public hanging. Waiting was all he could do, waiting for death…

I sat up on my bed feeling lifeless. Arkham was cold, damp, and smelly. The horrible odor of feces and urine was enough to make me vomit, if I had had any food in my stomach. I knew in my heart I didn’t deserve this. Maybe serving time in a jail wouldn’t have been so bad. But to sit here in a insane asylum, and to listen to those blood curdling screams was pure torture.
Whoa, there's an abrupt change from third person to first person point of view.

Quote:
I was hit by his bullet in several places
Uh what?

As Endorenna pointed out, there are gaps in logic, as well as polishing problems (grammatical errors etc). I really can't believe that Bruce Wayne is dumb enough to get framed, much less arrested. And the idea of executing him in his suit (which btw would mean that the noose isn't in direct contact with his skin:P) is...weird. The descriptions too could use work (e.g. I said and held him against the wall by the collar.). I've seen you produce better works, so I'd chalk it down to rushing. All the same, it would be good if you thought the story through and allocated some time for polishing.



The sun goes down and the sky reddens, pain grows sharp.
light dwindles. Then is evening
when jasmine flowers open, the deluded say.
But evening is the great brightening dawn
when crested cocks crow all through the tall city
and evening is the whole day
for those without their lovers

-Kuruntokai 234, translated by A.K. Ramanujan

[Fic] Shreds of a Dying Belief
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