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Old 12-29-2001, 01:39 AM   #1
Kylilin
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Ever wonder?

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made

with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't

they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 12-29-2001, 05:35 PM   #2
digl
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lol
some good questions there
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Old 12-29-2001, 07:38 PM   #3
Jman3ooo
 
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Why is Phonetic not spelled phenoticly


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Old 12-30-2001, 03:13 PM   #4
SlashAndBurn
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Damn...those are some good questions. Esspecialy the one about congress.
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Old 01-01-2002, 10:34 AM   #5
Jman3ooo
 
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Sex is not the answer, It is a question. The answer is YES


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Old 01-03-2002, 09:49 PM   #6
BeastMaster
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Post

Quote:
Originally posted by Kylilin
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
It has to do with substance. Skin darkens as the pigment reacts to the radiation ("visible" light has nothing to do with it), but hair doesn't have the same type of pigmentation, so it reacts a different way.

Quote:
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Because they need to stretch the skin when they put on makeup; opening their jaw stretches the rest of the face like an elastic. It's the same thing men do when we shave.

Quote:
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Because it's assumed that everyone important already knows.

Quote:
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
False issue. The abbreviation you want is abbrv.

Quote:
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Because doctors aren't infallible.

Quote:
Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?
Because you start the shutdown process.

Quote:
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dish washing liquid made with real lemons?
You ever tasted real lemon juice? That's why.

Quote:
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Because he takes whatever's left for his fee.

Quote:
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Because if you could get quickly to where you wanted to go, you wouldn't be in a rush.

Quote:
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Mouse tastes like chicken.

Quote:
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
A better question would be: Who judges that it has improved?

Quote:
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Because he was smart enough to collect them when they were in the larval stage; he kept them in a bowl of water.

Quote:
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Possibly to avoid any diseases interacting with the poison and neutralizing it (hey, it could happen).

Quote:
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
It's not the substance, it's the construction; boxes don't have the best aerodynamics.

Quote:
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of a drive-up ATM?
Standardized construction; the buttons of all ATM machines come from the same mold.

Quote:
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Because they're not 100% wool. Meat and bone doesn't shrink.

Quote:
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
Because each module is divided apart from the rest.

Quote:
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
Yes.

Quote:
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
Because it connects to the terminus of the flight.



"The Beasts know much that we do not." -Ancient Jedi proverb
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Old 01-04-2002, 02:26 PM   #7
Kylilin
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uhhh....thanks, I guess....


"Who is splendid among men, who is glorious among heroes?"
--excerpt from Gilgamesh
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Old 01-04-2002, 10:56 PM   #8
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Thank you Beastmaster, you saved me from doing the same thing.


No working sig now, just lazy ones...
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Old 01-05-2002, 12:24 PM   #9
Nitro
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Yes, you saved some of us from a decent amount of work...


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Old 01-06-2002, 08:49 PM   #10
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Why do we drive on a parkway, and park on a driveway?

What color does a smurf turn if you choke one?

And, if Morpheus should chose the red one, wouldn't spoon fed be better?


No working sig now, just lazy ones...
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Old 01-07-2002, 06:58 AM   #11
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Im still wondering why the hell chicks dont dig StormTroopers...they see me and run


Mankind must put an end to war, before war puts an end to mankind-J.F.K
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