There are servers with some of the things you're looking for....
To tell you the truth I believe there are servers out there with Ghoul 2 Collision enabled..... The thing is, I'm not sure which ones have it..... I am sure, however, of servers with dismemberment enabled because I think almost all of them are.... All you need to do is activate it and wait for the settings to take play. The server I usually frequent one called "Van BC Feed the Need" and it has dismemberment enabled and I believe that the Ghoul 2 Collision will work there as well..... I'm also sure that the two new stances work in this server because I was just playing there a few hours ago. Anyway, I know I haven't been much help but if you need to ask any more questions, I'm here. See you on the servers.
-Darth Vitruvio (My name on the servers is: Darth Vitruvio (purple font).