lfnetwork.com mark read register faq members calendar

Thread: Review: Reign of Fire
Thread Tools Display Modes
Post a new thread. Add a reply to this thread. Indicate all threads in this forum as read. Subscribe to this forum. RSS feed: this forum RSS feed: all forums
Old 07-17-2002, 01:36 AM   #1
BeastMaster
Dragon in Residence
 
BeastMaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 1999
Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,275
Thumbs down Review: Reign of Fire (SPOILERS, duh)

Blech.

This was just wrong.

Okay, I'll allow that my personal feelings toward dragonkind may colour my judgement, so I'll ignore the little things. Things like dragons being portrayed as no more intelligent than locusts, the incorrect use/creation of dragon-flame, the impossible nutritional requirements (they eat what?!?), the ignorance about the difference between dragons and wyverns, and even about how to distinguish genders.

I'll stick to the dramatic concerns.

Nope, it still stinks.

The set-up is okay, but when the narration comes up (to cover the time-jump through the apocalypse) the plot inconsistancies start piling up.

Apparently, dragons were real, but humans managed to beat them back with swords and lances from horseback. Okay. Now, however, the dragons are a match for the finest weapons that 21st century humanity can field. Assault helicopters, tanks, and nukes aren't enough to wipe them out.

The plot from there drags through a typical post-apocalyptic Messiah story (seriously, check out Christian Bale's look as Quinn; all he needs is the crown of thorns).

Enter Van Zan (or Van Zane, depending on who's saying it). The American Dragonslayer.

It's a British movie (as evidenced by "England as the World," as opposed to "USA as the World" ), but this is a bad showing for archetypal American. I know Dragonslayers are all pompous, mean-spirited jerks (it's kinda a job requirement), but seriously. Zan is an @$$hole worthy of Captain Ahab.

So, it turns out that the big dragon that we saw earlier, the one who's been dormant (under London, the most bustling city in England) for centuries is the only male, and that all these dragons are female. So, if Zan can kill the male, all the other dragons will die off (no-one to mate with; no new generations).

Because, of course, the alpha male in frickin' London is the only male on the entire planet, after about 10 years of breeding enough to fill the sky with clouds of the beasties.

So, if the big dragon that woke up in Act 1 was the male, and it was the only dragon running around at first, where the frell did the rest of them come from???

Incidentally, that pregnant (no pun intended) pause in the action, where Quinn pulls the egg from the female's corpse? The scene that's in all the trailers (and several posters)? Utterly irrelevent. Absolutely no reference or explanation later on, not even a lame sequel-setup.

Plus, on a purely environmental basis, I didn't like the whole idea of genocide being the only way to save humanity.

Oh, and the reason the dragons are burning everything in site? They eat ash. That's right, ash. Yet they still gleefully scoop people up and crunch them in their sharp, predatory teeth. I guess they have to get their basic nutrients somewhere.

That's right folks, this was Battlefield Earth with "dragons."

Save your money and go see something classy instead, like Croc Hunter.


"The Beasts know much that we do not." -Ancient Jedi proverb
BeastMaster is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-17-2002, 02:02 AM   #2
Boba Rhett
I Slay Dragons
 
Boba Rhett's Avatar
 
Status: Administrator
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Man-Room in Missouri
Posts: 13,806
Current Game: Scrolling Eldery
LFN Staff Member 10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! 
Ok ok, you're right about pretty much everything you said.


I didn't mind how they portrayed dragons. I don't really have an opinion on it like you do.

I thought it was explained that the dragons went into hibernation because of they brought about the Ice Age and that they ran out of enough food? I don't remember anything about people beating them back. Maybe I just forgot.

I didn't mind Van Zan's character. The only part that really REALLY bothered me was the ending.
spoiler:
Why'd he have to jump at the dragon?
Boba Rhett is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-17-2002, 05:50 AM   #3
BeastMaster
Dragon in Residence
 
BeastMaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 1999
Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,275
The way I understood it was that the dragons burned away the dinosaurs and caused the ice age with the ash, during which they starved themselves nearly into extinction/hibernation.

They had however re-emerged since then, which was where the medieval legends come from.

What really got me was how they were suddenly everywhere, and unstoppable.

As for Zan's kamikaze attack, I guess he figured that a one-in-a-million chance of doing some damage with his axe was better then a certainty of dying by jumping off in any other direction (or just waiting to be eaten).

He figured he was dead anyway, so he might as well try to do some damage.

The most engaging thing about the movie was the Shanghai Nights trailer. I didn't even know that one was in the pipe.


"The Beasts know much that we do not." -Ancient Jedi proverb
BeastMaster is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-17-2002, 06:26 AM   #4
Boba Rhett
I Slay Dragons
 
Boba Rhett's Avatar
 
Status: Administrator
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Man-Room in Missouri
Posts: 13,806
Current Game: Scrolling Eldery
LFN Staff Member 10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! 
Oh yeah, I can't wait for Shanghai Nights. Shanghai Noon was one of the funniest movies I've ever seen. I've never laughed so hard before.
Boba Rhett is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-17-2002, 11:53 PM   #5
BeastMaster
Dragon in Residence
 
BeastMaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 1999
Location: Ottawa, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,275
Thumbs up



As a general rule of thumb, anything involving Jackie Chan is good. He's one of the few true artists of physical comedy, and you can tell he truly enjoys what he's doing.

Jackie Chan & Owen Wilson is almost as good a team as Jackie Chan & Chris Tucker.

EDIT: Can somebody tell me why I had to cut and paste the popcorn smilie to avoid this? opcorn:


"The Beasts know much that we do not." -Ancient Jedi proverb
BeastMaster is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 07-18-2002, 04:05 AM   #6
Boba Rhett
I Slay Dragons
 
Boba Rhett's Avatar
 
Status: Administrator
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Man-Room in Missouri
Posts: 13,806
Current Game: Scrolling Eldery
LFN Staff Member 10 year veteran! LF Jester Helpful! 
When Aristotle put them up, he forgot the ":" on either side of them and normal words where being replaced with smilies so I quickly stuck the ":" onto them but some of the words he chose contained other smilie codes. Like ": and P". That's why the one you tried made the face.


It'll be fixed sooner or later.
Boba Rhett is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Post a new thread. Add a reply to this thread. Indicate all threads in this forum as read. Subscribe to this forum. RSS feed: this forum RSS feed: all forums
Go Back   LucasForums > Network > Star Wars Classic Gaming > 1. The HuB > The Cantina! > Review: Reign of Fire

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:33 PM.

LFNetwork, LLC ©2002-2011 - All rights reserved.
Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.