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Old 01-08-2004, 04:27 PM   #1
Ray Jones
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Post the ray, the jones and the tasty thingys

i am usually hungry 23 hours a day. the remaining 4 hours i spend with eating. usually i leave my home with 10 cups-o-coffee, 2 glasses of ice cold milk and lets say 5 marmelade-chocolate-pretzels in my stomach. so i did today. but usually i get of the underground trains and am hungry again. there is this bakery where you can get tasty things like marmelade-chocolate-pretzels. they also offer "ready to eat" stuff like sandwiches and so on. so i got me a tomato-mozzarella-sandwich what i think i one of the tastiest things besides all the other tastiest thingys..

now it comes. sitting in fron of my computer a cup of coffee in one hand, this sandwich in the other .. taking the first bite.. i had to witness one of the worst crimes ever..
TUM TUUMMM TUUUUMMMMMMM!!!
..
MAYONNAISE!!!!

on a tomato-mozzarella sandwich. man. it was like discovering the world actually IS a plate. complete wrong. a desaster. i died at this moment. now i am here ranting from this other level of existance about so much incompetence. and with that i have to realize they do it always. they always put tons of mayonnaise on sandwiches. even if its a mayonnaise-sandwich already, they'd add some mayonnaise. and usually one half-rotten lettuce leaf, too. everywhere in this country it is like this. that is just disgusting.
i once asked "why".. the answer was "because then it isnt so dry."
HEY!! if I want something "not so dry" then i get me a soup or a girl and martini bianco. TSK!!

that's why i like cooking/ making my food myself. it's pretty like "no surprises and only your own hair in that sausage". and also cooking is fun. real fun.



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Old 01-08-2004, 04:37 PM   #2
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Re: the ray, the jones and the tasty thingys

MAYONNAISE???


i hate mayonnaise


i have abit of a fetish for peanut butter & celery at the moment, i hope i'm not pregnant... lol
like that Arnold swarzeggerejdkjfsk film... predator
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Old 01-16-2004, 04:49 AM   #3
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Post Spock here

Quote:
Originally posted by RayJones
i am usually hungry 23 hours a day. the remaining 4 hours i spend with eating.
Hmmm... 23 plus four hours a day equals...

27

Ray, you aren't even from this planet, are you? ARE YOU?
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Old 01-16-2004, 07:53 AM   #4
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yes i am .. but obviously my earth is rotating slower that yours. it needs 3 hours more for one complete cycle. hey..
or was it just because i redrew the dial of my clock..? one hour is now 53 minutes and 20 seconds..



siv: eewww... schwarzenegger inseminated a predator? these are nasty pictures.


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Old 01-16-2004, 03:26 PM   #5
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I thought maybe it meant you were still hungry while eating. Do you eat in your sleep too, or do you only sleep 1 hour a day?


Alright, alright. Let's just calm down and settle this over a nice cyanide pill eating contest, you go first.
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Old 01-16-2004, 03:43 PM   #6
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i use a metric clock, so there are 10 hours in my day...

10 hours per day, 100 minutes per hour and 100 seconds per minute

right now its 6:75.66

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Old 01-16-2004, 04:17 PM   #7
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Ray you've right (for once!! )

Why do all sandwiches seem to revolve around foul gunk that only dieting women seem to enjoy? Presumably dieting women enjoy this disgusting slimy mess because it puts them off eating for a few hours.

It reminds me of this time I was at work (back in the days before I became a freelance artist, genious and general great guy). I was working at a different site that day and the office girls/crones asked me if I'd like a sandwich......I asked for a cheese sandwich and was given some slimy, muched up combination of cheese and filth.

Down with mayonaise! Down with gunk!

A SANDWICH DOESN'T HAVE TO BE SLIMY TO BE JUICY!


Roy Tordes - The Legend
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Old 01-16-2004, 11:00 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally posted by SuicidalXWing
I thought maybe it meant you were still hungry while eating. Do you eat in your sleep too, or do you only sleep 1 hour a day?
no it said hungry= 23h; eating= 4h; for a 24h day this means: 4h= eating= not sleeping; 24h day- 4h eating= 20h (possible) sleeping. if we now would say a day lasts 1 hour and 12 minutes, i (possibly) sleep 'only' 1 hour a day. but never while i am eating .. i mean .. only 12 minutes.

with that and siv's example it's proven: scale is sizeable and size doesnt matter.

uuhhm.

and also i now damn myself for not posting a poll. hmpf.. even roy is against it. that means he has the same opinion like me, what usually only happens if you throw panties in the game and ask "is this a pantee?" ..
oh-no.. i could have banned it for ever from sandwiches!! boohoo.

errm.. that reminds me of a friend. everytime we go to mc d's he orders a royal ts without onions. usually they only have prepared royal tses with onions. so they have to make a new one. that way he always get a fresh and hot burger.

hmm.. worth a try.


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Old 01-17-2004, 12:00 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by RoyTordesLegend
A SANDWICH DOESN'T HAVE TO BE SLIMY TO BE JUICY!
That's true on so many levels...
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Old 01-17-2004, 11:56 PM   #10
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so this thread is mainly about the fact that mayonnaise is not good?


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Old 01-18-2004, 02:57 AM   #11
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well, mayonaise ISN'T good. It's disgusting. Just white gunky stuff taht doens't taste like anything. Mustard is the way to go.


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Old 01-18-2004, 08:37 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by Herminator_64
so this thread is mainly about the fact that mayonnaise is not good?
mainly it's about
TUM TUUMMM TUUUUMMMMMMM!!!
..
MAYONNAISE!!!!
..
on a tomato-mozzarella sandwich.



a summary (thanks to the people who participated ):
it's just "eewwwww" to use it everywhere and tons of it. it makes sandwiches slimy if used like water in an ocean, not to speak about salads. the taste is like not existing but it destroys also any other taste. everything's gonna taste like it feels .. slimy. roy and zoom also support the opinion that a sandwich should be juicy but not slimy.

i am pretty sure too much of it could be not good for health.

when my girl makes potato salad, she uses mayonnaise. but she only takes a little bit of it so that it's not gonna be slimy and the taste just adds up the taste of the whole salad. yummy.

so this thread is not only about "bad mayonnaise" it's in a wider context about good and maily tasty food and how to make it or where to get it. food also should not be any crap, because over 60% of the energy we produce from what we eat is used to drive the brain.



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Old 01-18-2004, 10:29 AM   #13
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Cool Guy Boxey thinking

Quote:
Originally posted by Herminator_64
so this thread is mainly about the fact that mayonnaise is not good?
Actually it's about Martha Stewart. We're just going about it very, very secretively...

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Old 01-18-2004, 03:41 PM   #14
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Shh! You've said too much already!


Alright, alright. Let's just calm down and settle this over a nice cyanide pill eating contest, you go first.
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Old 01-21-2004, 09:44 AM   #15
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I love mayonnaise, and I love garlic mayonnaise even more. Yes, I know I'm a freak.


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Old 01-21-2004, 11:38 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally posted by leXX
I love mayonnaise, and I love garlic mayonnaise even more. Yes, I know I'm a freak.
argh! liquid burp alert!!!
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Old 01-21-2004, 11:39 AM   #17
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"Martha Stewart" + "MAYONNAISE" = me running away
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Old 01-21-2004, 11:44 AM   #18
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yup. it's *runs away* season, again.

Quote:
Originally posted by Siv
argh! liquid burp alert!!!
i though it was "liquid laugh"


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Old 01-21-2004, 11:57 AM   #19
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Quote:
Originally posted by leXX
I love mayonnaise, and I love garlic mayonnaise even more. Yes, I know I'm a freak.
*breaks the 'in case of bad breath' container*
*gives mint to leXX*
*sounds liquid burp alarm again*


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-21-2004, 12:53 PM   #20
Ray Jones
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*pants -> wet*
















..

*runs away*


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Old 01-21-2004, 02:06 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally posted by RayJones

i though it was "liquid laugh"

the difference is a 'liquid burp' is when you burp it up and then it goes back down again. liquid laughing is the full-on exorcist up-chuck.

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Old 01-21-2004, 02:30 PM   #22
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aahhh-haahahahahahaha!
..

*wet pants -> ocean dry*











*ehem* .. so different from the burp the laugh basically must not be an oral one?



..


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