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Old 01-16-2004, 11:52 PM   #1
Reborn Outcast
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My friends make fun of me because I do not want to get drunk...

I am 15 years old and I'm living a pretty good life now. I have good morals, I plan to save sex for a special person when I'm married and I don't want to get drunk.

It's the last part that I'm having trouble with now (well, not exactly trouble, just problems with my friends about). I'm in 10th grade, and ever since my friends and I got into highschool, I've noticed them wanting more and more to get drunk. Now, they pressure me to get drunk too, but everytime I refuse, saying that it doesnt look appealing to me, or that it just seems wrong to. Now, yesterday the emotions soared to the point where I was making bets with my best friends that I wouldn't get drunk in highschool. They made fun of me, saying that they were going to get me drunk sometime and that there was no way I could resist. I have other friends who don't drink, and I'm glad that I can go to them for support, but when they're not there, and it's 4 or 5 vs me, I don't know what to say. I can't come up with a plausable arguement as to why I don't want to drink, only that it "feels wrong, and doesn't appeal to me." They think that that is a stupid reason, and continually tell me so.

Has anyone else experienced this, and if so, what advice do you have for me? (Take note though, that I am NOT going to get drunk [and notice I'm saying drunk, of course I'm going to have a sip of wine with my parents on New Years, or on their birthdays] and I don't plan to get drunk. Just so that everyone knows.)
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Old 01-17-2004, 12:00 AM   #2
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While they are suffering their head-throbbing, vomit-producing hangover, be the sober friend that offers support.

If they feel you are not "cool" because you won't drink, They aren't your friends at all.

Either that, or them making fun of you is their way of saying that they respect your opinions(sounds wierd, but hear me out), and that they would never actually force you to drink. My friends are party dogs and get drunk/high/sexed up all the time. When they offer me the same "night on the town," I always tell them no. They mock me sure, but they always talk to me the next day, or always ask for my advice. (Which they never take, btw)
So just stay strong and stand up for what you think is right. It's worth fighting for.




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Old 01-17-2004, 12:00 AM   #3
Jared
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lol you're afraid to get drunk?
we all do it man...no harm in trying it....unless the voic---eh..."god" told you not to.....or...something...


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Old 01-17-2004, 12:04 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jared
lol you're afraid to get drunk?
we all do it man...no harm in trying it....
Don't mock him, man.

No harm in trying it? What if it alters him into a state of being a violent, cursing idiot like I have seen done on many of occasions?


And we don't *all* do it. I, for one, have only been drunk once, and that's because some idiot spiked punch at a dance. Never do I want to return to that state. I don't drink or do drugs. Never have. The thought of not being in control of my own mind is frightening. I think not getting into an altered state shows responsibility.




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Old 01-17-2004, 12:04 AM   #5
Miko Reglia
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well dude being the same age, ive had sort of the same kind of peer pressure...

i remember talking to one girl and she was just telling me she regretted doing a lot of the stuff she did over summer, so i mean who knows, maybe your friends will regret getting drunk?

my advice is to just keep true to your morals and stay strong, because without em youd sorta loose direction and have nothing to stand up with...cause morals are sort of the guidelines you set yourself to live up to...

yeah...i hope that wasnt too confusing and i hope it helps

stay strong!



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Old 01-17-2004, 12:08 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jared
lol you're afraid to get drunk?
we all do it man...no harm in trying it....unless the voic---eh..."god" told you not to.....or...something...
Did I ever say afraid? I just don't see any appeal in indulging in something that takes away my self-control and decision making, and makes me vomit and have a massive hangover the next day. My highschool soccer team had a sleepover the day we lost our states game, and one of my best friends got so drunk (it was his first time, but he had always wanted to do it), that he was cut off by the other drinkers and that he drank someones piss. Being that far out of control of myself is NOT appealing to me. Not to mention that he hurled 4 times out in the front yard, along with the others people falling asleep in their own barf.

Good stuff!... not.

At least there were 8 or 9 other people who didn't drink that I could hang out with.




So afraid? No.
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Old 01-17-2004, 12:15 AM   #7
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alright fine....sorry....I wasn't trying to make fun of you...
hangovers are not fun. Neither is waking up and trying to remember what you did the night before.

but...being drunk off your ass is fun....
Me....I used to be afraid of not being in control of my actions...it really scared me....but....as time went on I figured....why not...I mean it couldn't be any worse for you then drugs...so....why not.

its fun.


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Old 01-17-2004, 12:24 AM   #8
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Yeah Jared. Being drunk off your ass sure is fun. I mean, It did cost my Uncle John his life when he drove into a bridge and my other uncle Wendel his life when he drove into a tree in the same year. Oh, and my Grandmother her house and all of her belongings when her second husband got drunk and mad at her so he decided to tortch the place. Oh and all those beatings she took too. But hell, It's all fun and no worse than drugs, right?


Tell them to leave you the hell alone and if they don't, I suggest that you find new friends, Reborn. Ones that respect you and your decisions.
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Old 01-17-2004, 12:28 AM   #9
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*buys Rhett a cold one*

Sad and unfortunate, but true examples of what this could lead to.




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Old 01-17-2004, 01:06 AM   #10
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i am also 15, and personaly i find getting drunk once in a while is quite fun, say after passing some big test or something simler, but i have a good friend who shares your point of view. And every time hes at mine and im having a beer, i'll always offer him one, out of politeness, knowing full well he'll say no. If anything this makes me respect hm as he sticks to his point of view. If he just accepted the beer cause i offered him one, i dunno, i wouldnt repsect him as much as i do cause it would be like he was selling out. So in short being offered one beer is okay, as its normaly a matter of manners, you dont have to accept it, but make your friends know not to presure you or offer more. If they do, give 'em the finger and find some other friends.


and rhett that is some harsh stuff for you and your family and i offer my condolences , but it does show if you ever do decide to drink R.O., drink in moderation and drink responaby.



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Old 01-17-2004, 01:14 AM   #11
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Re: My friends make fun of me because I do not want to get drunk...

Quote:
Originally posted by Reborn Outcast
I'm in 10th grade, and ever since my friends and I got into highschool, I've noticed them wanting more and more to get drunk.
Heh, can't believe me and my friends were like that at that age, it's stupid looking back and seeing how naive I was.

Anyways Reborn, good for you man. I mean it, I have complete respect for you for not giving into peer pressure...especially being able to stand up to your friends and just say "no". And Obi's right, if they can't deal with your decision, then they are not friends at all.

I was quite different at that age. I started drinking on and off with my friends at 15/16, cos it was the "in" thing to do =P Just every now and then. It's funny how grown up and "cool" you think you feel doing it. I gave into my friends rather easily. Was nothing major, but as I gained more sense, I realised how stupid it was. I don't even like alcohol, so see no point in drinking it hardly. Plus it leaves me with the worst hangovers ever, at which point I always swear "I'm never getting drunk again" (good excuse there) XP

Still, I'm nearly 18, so every month or so I'll go out with my friends, only cos alcohol helps me loosen up a lil. Still mate, if you don't wanna go along with your friends, props to you. Thanks to underage drinking, some of my friends have a real problem, in the pub every night getting wasted. And you know where that leads from there, I'm sure I don't need to give examples of the causes of alcohol.

You don't have to do it. Takes guts to say no. If you don't wanna do it, just don't ;p


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Old 01-17-2004, 01:41 AM   #12
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I know the peer pressure's there, Reborn, and I'm happy to see that you've refused to get drunk. I knew a few classmates last year who were alcoholics, and they weren't that different from the stoners at school. They didn't get good grades. Their parents were angry at them. About the only thing they could talk about was getting drunk. It was tragic sitting there and hearing them describe a life of addiction, frustration and utter meaninglessness.

I have never been drunk because the risks far outweigh the benefits. I don't want to retch my stomach out and suffer splitting headaches. I don't want to make poor choices and possibly harm another human being because I don't have good judgement while I'm drunk. Besides, I don't like the taste of alcohol anyway. (I suppose it takes an acquired taste, but I think the stuff is just nasty)

Anyway, good to hear you aren't giving in to peer pressure. Keep it up!

Btw, Rhett, you have my condolences. What you went through was horrible, I have no doubt. Still, you made a very good point and I admire the fact that you decided to share it with us, as it must not have been easy to do. It just goes to show that alcohol is not harmless.


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Old 01-17-2004, 02:32 AM   #13
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Good for you Reborn. Those type of people are not your friends AT ALL. Forget them, and move on to different friends.

Well, I had a couple drinks in my lifetime. Nothing major. I once had a lil glass of champaigne, and Pepsi mixed with Shlivovica (strong shiznit).

I had the glass of champagne (was pretty good), and a sip of the mix. It was ok. But, I'd never go to the point of being drunk, its idiotic IMO.





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Old 01-17-2004, 02:36 AM   #14
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Good for you. Don't take the mockery to heart either. There are plenty of moral relativists and nihilists even who don't drink. Putting yourself into a stupor where you lose even more of life than already flies past is stupid. Live life, don't beat it into an oozing lump of chemical submission.


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Old 01-17-2004, 03:31 AM   #15
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Tell um to screw off. I'm never gonna drink, like you. I agree with you on everything you said.


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Old 01-17-2004, 03:38 AM   #16
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Re: My friends make fun of me because I do not want to get drunk...

Quote:
Originally posted by Reborn Outcast
Has anyone else experienced this, and if so, what advice do you have for me? (Take note though, that I am NOT going to get drunk [and notice I'm saying drunk, of course I'm going to have a sip of wine with my parents on New Years, or on their birthdays] and I don't plan to get drunk. Just so that everyone knows.)
Hey dude, I know the same feeling, Ive had alot of freind try to pressure me into drinking and smoking weed and what not. But dude, if you have morals, stick to them, I've always found that the coolest people I've ever met, are the people who have morals and beliefs and wont change then just because somone wants them to.

If you friends really care, they'll respect your morals and your reason... you let them know that.
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Old 01-17-2004, 04:32 AM   #17
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Re: My friends make fun of me because I do not want to get drunk...

Quote:
Originally posted by Reborn Outcast
I am 15 years old and I'm living a pretty good life now. I have good morals, I plan to save sex for a special person when I'm married and I don't want to get drunk.

It's the last part that I'm having trouble with now (well, not exactly trouble, just problems with my friends about). I'm in 10th grade, and ever since my friends and I got into highschool, I've noticed them wanting more and more to get drunk. Now, they pressure me to get drunk too, but everytime I refuse, saying that it doesnt look appealing to me, or that it just seems wrong to. Now, yesterday the emotions soared to the point where I was making bets with my best friends that I wouldn't get drunk in highschool. They made fun of me, saying that they were going to get me drunk sometime and that there was no way I could resist. I have other friends who don't drink, and I'm glad that I can go to them for support, but when they're not there, and it's 4 or 5 vs me, I don't know what to say. I can't come up with a plausable arguement as to why I don't want to drink, only that it "feels wrong, and doesn't appeal to me." They think that that is a stupid reason, and continually tell me so.

Has anyone else experienced this, and if so, what advice do you have for me? (Take note though, that I am NOT going to get drunk [and notice I'm saying drunk, of course I'm going to have a sip of wine with my parents on New Years, or on their birthdays] and I don't plan to get drunk. Just so that everyone knows.)
Dude. Those people are not your friends. Have you ever had health class? If you did you should rember everythinhg they taught you when you get back to school on Tuesday. You should start finding yoursel fsome new friends.

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Old 01-17-2004, 04:54 AM   #18
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Hey, i'm a freshman in college and i've resisted the temptations and pressures to complete success so far.

I try alcoholic drinks, and maybe some day if I find one I like i'll drink some. But so far every single alcoholic drink I've had has tasted absolutely awful. BLEH




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Old 01-17-2004, 05:11 AM   #19
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I agree with you. I got drunk one time, and I was a complete ****in idiot because of it. I hated it. I was a mean ******* while I was drunk. I couldn't control myself. I hated it.
Now I won't drink...alot
The occasional sip o wine, the occasional Skyy Blue, but not 15 of em
I am happy for you. Stay strong, you have no clue how many times this past semester(frshman) that I have turned down weed and booze and even meth. Let's all have a drink(j/k)



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Old 01-17-2004, 06:37 AM   #20
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Stuff em

Quote:
Originally posted by Reborn Outcast
I am 15 years old and I'm living a pretty good life now. I have good morals, I plan to save sex for a special person when I'm married and I don't want to get drunk.

It's the last part that I'm having trouble with now (well, not exactly trouble, just problems with my friends about). I'm in 10th grade, and ever since my friends and I got into highschool, I've noticed them wanting more and more to get drunk......
Firstly, and this is VERY important - NEVER do anything that in your heart you feel is wrong or that you are not ready for. Peer group pressure is a pressure bourne on the mind, it is during these years in your life when you must learn to differentiate between this type of pressure and the type that goes against the very type of person you think you are.

This isnt to say that you will never want to drink, but I think you are being VERY MATURE in thinking about this to begin with. Most other kids would just have done it and started themselves on a road with potentially disastrous consequences. A 15 year old's body is NOT equipped to deal with larger amounts of alcohol, this being due in particular to the liver not being *fully* developed yet, amongst other things. I have a 15 year old step daughter who smokes and it just pains me to see her relentless 'giving in', content to go with the flow and do what is perceived as cool, lest she be the odd one out and thus be alienated from her group of friends.

Truth is, life changes, your friends change. I very barely keep in touch with a couple of people I knew in high school. When you have a partner, a mortgage a family, they become your priorities, and you very quickly put the agonies of decisions that had to be made at this age behind you. However, if you chose to go with the flow, and do something even though there is a part of you that thinks it is fundamentally wrong this can set a pattern for how you deal with things for the rest of your life.....

Things that I would like to state emphatically :
NO - you do not need alcohol to have agood time, at any age
Alcohol can potentially lead to you making bad decisions with terrible consequences, eg getting someone pregnant unintentionally, car accidents etc.....

I did not drink until I was 18(the legal age here in Australia) and now only socially drink. I admit I did go through a short periiod between 21-22 when I binge-drank frequently enough for it to make me realise that it just something that I didn want to do any longer, as I was feeling ill and my behaviour was affecting my friends and loved ones, not to mention my education.


At the end of the day, I say do what your heart dictates to you is right, and learn to be stroing in the face of peer pressure, believe me it will serve you well, the sooner you develop a truer independence of mind, the better. Also it is not a bad thing to seek advice from older people, be they your parents, relatives, teachers, counsellors etc.

As for anyone getting on this post and saying crap like 'gettin wasted in fun'...... grow up...

MTFBWYA


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Old 01-17-2004, 07:57 AM   #21
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If you don't want to get drunk..............dont.............it doesn't mean you cant have a drink or 2.
A lot of the time there is at least one person in a group of freinds that doesn't want to. so don't. I don't get drunk a lot of the time, mainly cause I want to see who I'm talking to....and remember how to put numbers in my phone





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Old 01-17-2004, 08:22 AM   #22
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I really respect ya, man. Both sex and getting drunk decisions these days seem to rarely be like yours.

You're a smart kid, stay that way. It's safer, and although they may say it's "fun"...one little thing can change your life forever...or end it.


Better safe than sorry. It's great you're saving sex for a special person...very great...and it's great you don't want to go out and get drunk. Both are fantastic decisions. If you have to be drunk to keep those friends, or if they try to force you into something you don't want to do, they are probably not friends, at all.


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Old 01-17-2004, 08:26 AM   #23
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Presure from friends can be a big thing though.
basically, if they are close friends and they noknow you don't mean offence tell thenm to PO.
Works for me.





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Old 01-17-2004, 08:28 AM   #24
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I forgot to mention the sex thing. Just out of curiosity(and no religious flaming) what religion are you, if any? Just sounds like you're a really rightious man, and I respect you a whole lot now.



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Old 01-17-2004, 08:35 AM   #25
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Are you talking to me or Hotrod boy?





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Old 01-17-2004, 09:00 AM   #26
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Quote:
Originally posted by Acrylic
Good for you Reborn. Those type of people are not your friends AT ALL. Forget them, and move on to different friends.
Because they make a few jokes about him? Trust me, if you take advice like this, you're going to end up a lonely guy.
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Old 01-17-2004, 09:51 AM   #27
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Bah! Don't listen to all these people tell you how crappy a hangover is. Once you're a full blown alcoholic like myself, you don't get them anymore. And besides, who has time for a hangover, when there's all this drinking to do? That's the answer, don't stop drinking, then your hangover woes are a thing of the past.


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Old 01-17-2004, 10:00 AM   #28
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Quote:
Originally posted by Darth Rythe
Are you talking to me or Hotrod boy?
He's talking to reborn...and if you're implying I have those thoughts because im too young to "get it"...there's no reason to call me a "boy" I'm old enough to have my own life, and I own my own business, thank you very much.


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Old 01-17-2004, 11:55 AM   #29
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Quote:
Originally posted by CapNColostomy
Bah! Don't listen to all these people tell you how crappy a hangover is. Once you're a full blown alcoholic like myself, you don't get them anymore. And besides, who has time for a hangover, when there's all this drinking to do? That's the answer, don't stop drinking, then your hangover woes are a thing of the past.
Errrr, what little world are you living in?

Reborn, if you don't want to get drunk thats fine. Guy's your age are always a little cruel when someone doesn't follow the group, but just because you don't to get drunk doesn't mean you can't drink.
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Old 01-17-2004, 01:29 PM   #30
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Two months and one day ago I was on a weekend field trip to Philadelphia. This type of trip was notorious for its afterhours, rule-breaking parties. I had the unpleasant experience of having taken part in the last one.

It was roughly 1:00 AM when the organizers started sneaking people into the party room, and when they were all there, the beverage started to pour. A particularly bad vodka and sprite mixture if I remember correctly. I had some, my friends had some, the majority of us were reasonably drunk. Everyone had left at about 3:00, all except for one. When she got a bit out of control, I called her roommate to come get her. As she was leaving, a hotel security guard popped out of a door by mere coincidence to check the unaffiliated room next to us. First question: who is your advisor.

The lot of us were suspended, banned from overnight fieldtrips, and kicked out of the Nation Honors Society. Looking back on my life, I don't regret it, because that's useless, but had I the chance to do it over again, I would change a few decisions.

Don't be afraid to be who you are, because if you try to be someone else, you won't be happy, you'll be empty inside.

That seemed relevant.


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Old 01-17-2004, 02:48 PM   #31
jokemaster
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All my drinking experience:
less than 1/4th of a beer can
1 sip of wine
1 sip of champagne
1 sip of tequila


Nothin more.


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-17-2004, 02:58 PM   #32
The_One
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I do what I want.

Peer pressure or other people do not dictate to me what I do or do not do. We were given the capacity to think on our own for a reason - use it...



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Maude Lebowski: What do you do for recreation?
The Dude: Oh, the usual. I bowl. Drive around. The occasional acid flashback.
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Old 01-17-2004, 04:34 PM   #33
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Quote:
Originally posted by C Shutt
Because they make a few jokes about him? Trust me, if you take advice like this, you're going to end up a lonely guy.
WEll, from what I read, they make more than a few jokes about him. I've had people make fun of me cuz I didnt wanna hang out and smoke weed with them after school, but they didnt pressure me, and they are my friends still. But, others, that FORCE you, are NOT your friends. Your true friends will respect your decision.





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Old 01-17-2004, 06:16 PM   #34
CapNColostomy
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Quote:
Originally posted by BawBag™
Errrr, what little world are you living in?
Errrr, it was a joke.


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Old 01-17-2004, 06:18 PM   #35
BawBag™
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Quote:
Originally posted by CapNColostomy
Errrr, it was a joke.
Oh right. Hi-larious.
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Old 01-17-2004, 06:19 PM   #36
•-BLaCKouT-•
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Quote:
Originally posted by CapNColostomy
Errrr, it was a joke.
It was? Damn I thought you had a good point there.

B.




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Old 01-17-2004, 06:44 PM   #37
CapNColostomy
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Originally posted by BawBag™
Oh right. Hi-larious.
Hey, thanks! By the way, I loved your work in the Lord of the Rings movies.



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Old 01-17-2004, 07:14 PM   #38
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Quote:
Originally posted by CapNColostomy
Hey, thanks! By the way, I loved your work in the Lord of the Rings movies.

O.K. I'll give you that one
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Old 01-17-2004, 07:36 PM   #39
BongoBob
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No fla-
*looks at picture again*
.
.
*snickers*
Ok, that WAS a good one.
But still, no more flaming


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Old 01-17-2004, 08:43 PM   #40
Troopr-Undr-Fir
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Your a smart man Reborn, smart man. Why is being drunk consisderd manly? It only makes you look stupid and from family experiences with this I SHOULD KNOW.




"I don't have to F*cking impress you..." - Stewie
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