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Old 01-01-2007, 11:30 AM   #81
CSI
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Nice chapter as always Mr_BFA. Keep it coming.




| Muunilinst 10 | Real Life | Exiled Jedi Weapon Master | Ex-Sith Marauder | Gunslinger |
Killed in a suicide attempt of ramming his own ship, Ravager, onto the surface of Telos IV. --Casualty Report: Order 66
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Old 01-01-2007, 09:54 PM   #82
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Thanks, to all of you.

@Pottsie:To be honest, i dont even know how many chapters are left. I would like to write as many as i can before the end of it, because i dont want to have anything rushed, and stuff.

But not to worry, lol. I doubt that it will be a 50 chapter story ... Even though, that would be pretty damn cool, lol

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Old 01-02-2007, 08:04 AM   #83
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Nice , very nice Mr_BFA . Can't wait for more saber swinging action !!!


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Old 01-06-2007, 11:22 AM   #84
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Haven't read all of it yet. but I like what I've read so far. Keep it up



Currently working on: [Fic] Honour Bound

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Old 01-13-2007, 05:19 AM   #85
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CHAPTER 16

CHAPTER 16

Turning off his lightsaber, Nom knelt down by Bastilla. He placed his hand on her forehead; it burnt with extreme heat.

“What’s happened to her?” he asked, looking up at Carth.

“I don’t know,” said Carth, “Did you see the sith do anything to her?”

“No,”

“We’ve got company!” yelled Atton, igniting the orange glow of his lightsaber.

Nom and Carth looked up towards the end of the corridor, where more sith had started to pour in.

“Don’t they ever give up?” yelled Carth, pulling out his blaster as he got up

“Apparently not,” replied Nom, activating his lightsaber but then he stopped, “Wait, I’ve got an idea,”

“Please, discuss,” said Carth

Nom pointed to Atton, Mira, Visas and Jolee. “Come here and form a line across the corridor. Quick!”
They issued a line across the passageway, blocking the way.

“I think I know what you’ve got in mind, kid,” said Atton, smiling.

“On three,” nodded Nom, at Atton. Apparently the rest of them got the idea also, because they were preparing themselves already. The sith in front of the stopped just an easy twenty paces away, and looked at them curiously with sneering faces.

“One!”
The sith looked at each other uncomfortably, slowly their sneers failing.

“Two!”
Two-dozen red blades were issued, emanating the entire corridor in a reddish light.

Nom, gathered as much of the Force to him as he possibly could. Feeling that amount of power, nearly brought him to his knees, but he kept his feet.

“THREE!” roared Nom.
There was a deafening noise as: Nom, Atton, Mira, Visas and Jolee all let loose simultaneously a Force Wave so powerful, it could fling a Krayt Dragon, halfway across the Tattooine desert. As the wave travelled across the air, chunks of thick stone broke off from the walls as the ground beneath them shook, nearly bringing them all down. But the Jedi, amazingly, kept upright. The warriors of light. Powering down the coming darkness, shattering the barrier between which separated the two.

There were feared shouts issued from all the Acolytes standing in front of them as each one flew backwards hundreds of feet. Their bones crushing in their bodies as the wave passed through them. Accompanied with several blaster shots from Carth and Mission’s blasters, and several bolts from Zaalbar’s crossbow.
Drained of most of his strength, Nom fell to the ground.


* * *

“Get up, kid!” yelled Atton, “You don’t want to be crushed do you?”

“Huh?” said Nom, faintly.

Apparently, because of the Force Wave, the whole corridor was about to collapse on top of them if they didn’t get out of there now.

Atton helped him to his feet, and with his arm slung over Atton’s shoulder, Bastilla being carried by Carth, the company was able to get out just as the last chuck of ceiling fell, and the whole corridor dropped to the ground in a pile of rubble.

“Ahh,” came a grunt of pain “This damn leg!”

Nom looked around tired and noticed Jolee sitting with his back against the wall, holding his injured leg in his hands. A large gash had his robes covered in blood.

“Let me help you, old man,” said Mira, walking over to Jolee. Putting her hand over the wound, she dove into the Force. Discovering the damaged tendons, and strained muscles, she was able to bring back the tiny cells together, and she relaxed the muscles back to normal.

“I’m not a doctor or anything,” she said, standing back up, “But I think that will do, until you can get some professional medical attention,”

“Stupid,” muttered Jolee, getting back up “I could have done that myself you know. Just because im an old man, doesn’t mean I can’t take care of myself,”

“Some people,” said Mira, shaking her head.

A small moan from Bastilla drew all their attention, back to the ground. Her body, in a fragile state as it was, seemed to have been completely overcome by extreme exhaustion.

“She needs some of our strength if she is to survive,” said Visas

Atton sighed, ”We don’t have that much left, and don’t know what is coming up next,”

“Never the less, she is right.” Said Mira, “Stop being a child and come over here,”

They formed a circle around her, each placing a hand on her shoulders and forehead.

“I want to help,” said Carth. A roar from Zaalbar, notified them that he agreed. Same with a “Don’t even think you’re leaving me out of this!” from Mission

“Fine,” said Atton, “Well come here then, already,”

Zaalbar and Mission joined hands and walked to Nom.
“Place your hand in mine,” Nom said. She took his hand, and he was actually surprised to feel some strength and warmth come back to him. But he quickly pushed that all the way to the back of his mind. Zaalbar placed his on Bastilla’s shoulder.

“Mind if I sit here?” asked Carth, as he sat next to Mira

“Uhh … not at all,” she replied, giving him a weird look, as they took hands, and Carth placed his hand on the top of Bastilla’s head.

“Now, clear your minds of all thoughts, and only concentrate on lending your strength to Bastilla,” said Visas

They all closed their eyes, and felt small pieces fall away from each of them to form a sort of cocoon around Bastilla, before falling onto her body, and into her spirit below. Nom looked deep beneath and he could feel Bastilla’s faint presence their and he pushed towards it. But it was reluctant to let him go any further.

‘It’s me master. Let me in, we are all giving you some of our strength, to heal you’

“Come on, Bas!” whispered Carth

Slowly the wall retreated back and Nom was able to pour his strength in.
They each heard the slow beats of her heart, regain soft momentum, and gradually become faster and more potent.
There was a small intake of breath and their eyes snapped open all at once. They saw Bastilla’s own eyes, flicking to all of them, with deep gratitude, but they were also sad.

“Thank you,” she said. They all took the hands away and stood up. Carth giving her a helping hand, Bastilla was able to stand, but it took her a few seconds to remain steady.

“Im alright,” she assured them, “Because of all you,”

“Here,” said Nom, handing Bastilla back her lightsaber.
She took it smiling; she said, “You have grown already. Revan was right about you. I can feel the power just emanating from you, it’s overwhelming,”

“You should have seen the Force Wave he produced not to long ago. I bet even Coruscant would be suffering the aftershock from that.” Said Carth, admiringly

Nom felt his face go red and he looked away. Then he felt it, something terrible was going to happen.

“Revan!” he hissed

“I felt it too,” said Bastilla suddenly.
“Gather your strength, because now, most of all, haste is what we need,” said Nom, “The bottom levels is where Revan is situated, we need to get there fast, otherwise … “ he stopped to listen to what The Force, was telling him … he gasped “Otherwise, Revan will be without Force. They are going to strip it from him! Let’s go!”


* * *


Nom sped down a set of stairs, jumped down another set, gliding himself with the Force; he landed softly at the bottom of the staircase. “Go, Nom!” yelled Bastilla.

He did not need telling twice; leaving the others behind him, he sped down a long hall to his left. To where, he knew that Revan was held. As he ran further, the hall became darker. Switching on his lightsaber, he followed the now purple-lit corridor down to the very end to a turbo-lift.

“How deep does this bloody thing go!” cursed Nom, as he entered, pressed the button to take him down to the lowest level, and waited.

What he saw when the turbo-lift doors open, was enough to drain his lungs out of all air, which left him out of breath, at the horrific scene at what he was witnessing.

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Old 01-13-2007, 06:35 AM   #86
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I think it's terentatek? Are you going to reveal what happens to the other party members post-Malachor V?



The sun goes down and the sky reddens, pain grows sharp.
light dwindles. Then is evening
when jasmine flowers open, the deluded say.
But evening is the great brightening dawn
when crested cocks crow all through the tall city
and evening is the whole day
for those without their lovers

-Kuruntokai 234, translated by A.K. Ramanujan

[Fic] Shreds of a Dying Belief
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Old 01-13-2007, 06:45 AM   #87
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hmm, maybe. Never know .

I might do little Shortie Fics about the other party members, after i finish this one. But i highly doubt it. But ... we're still yet to see ... heck, even im still yet to see.

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Old 01-13-2007, 07:07 AM   #88
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I hope you do some Shorties Mr_BFA. This Fic is really good and your Shortie is also good. The Holiday one (Talk about a Vacation) doesn't really work for me though. Good Chapter as always Mr_BFA and I'm looking foward to more. Remember this member who annoyed everyone in this Thread?
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Old 01-13-2007, 07:10 AM   #89
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hehe, all righty oh yeah, just wanted to say that your writing really has improved as the story progresses!



The sun goes down and the sky reddens, pain grows sharp.
light dwindles. Then is evening
when jasmine flowers open, the deluded say.
But evening is the great brightening dawn
when crested cocks crow all through the tall city
and evening is the whole day
for those without their lovers

-Kuruntokai 234, translated by A.K. Ramanujan

[Fic] Shreds of a Dying Belief
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Old 01-13-2007, 07:14 AM   #90
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Quote:
Originally Posted by beehoon
hehe, all righty oh yeah, just wanted to say that your writing really has improved as the story progresses!
That I have to agree with. Mr_BFA just joined when he first posted this Fic.
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Old 01-13-2007, 07:22 AM   #91
The_Catto
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lol, yeah i only did the one chapter for Talk About A Vacation, and i didn't even like it.
And yeah he was annoying, but havent seen him since, so it's been good! lol.

As i said, i might do some Shorties, but not sure. I wouldn't mind in doing a spin-off starring Nom Kavar. What he does after all this. Depends on how this story ends as well .

Thanks for your comments aswell people. And remember, any mistakes in: Spelling, Grammer, Puncuation, anything like that. Let me know

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Old 01-16-2007, 05:24 AM   #92
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CHAPTER 17

Atrox bathed himself in the atrocious sunlight as he stepped out of his ship, walking down the small loading ramp. He sniffed the clean air as he caressed the hilt of his lightsaber. And he stared around taking in his surroundings.
The foliage spreading throughout the plains covered ancient relics of the kings of old. But what took Atrox’s notice was a large statue, which had been erected.
It looked proud and powerful, but also menacing. The eyes pierce the flesh of all those who look upon it, with a deep and dark passion.
With a sneer, Atrox unhitched his lightsaber from his belt, and ignited it. Lighting up his face with a look of pure evil. Walking towards the statue, Atrox raised the beam of energy and lunged in an upward motion, brought it across and striking through the solid rock, the head fell with a loud thud to the ground.

“You there!” came a raspy sort of voice, “How dare you desecrate the statue of our master,”

Turning around, Atrox seen a pair of Sith Lords walking towards, both had their Lightsabers already activated.

“Let me guess,” said Atrox in his deep, crackly voice, “You guys, are my welcoming committee?”

“No!” spat the Sith on the right, “We are, your death!”

They lunged through the air, but Atrox was already prepared for them. He brought his own saber up and blocked the oncoming attacks, bringing his other hand up, he constricted the chords within one of the Sith’s throat, whilst throwing the other one against the beheaded statue with an almost lazy flick of his hand; making him crash down onto the ground.

“Well, well,” said Atrox, “You were no one but your own deaths, so it seems, doesn’t it?”

“You may be able to kill us,” choked the Sith, “But our master will not be so easy,”

“We shall see,” Atrox said fiercely, “Now, say good-bye to your pathetic life,”
With that, he strengthened his grip on the Sith’s throat, and he felt the life force draining away. Once all was gone, he threw the body aside, and noticing movement to his right, he saw the other Sith, barely alive, but trying with all his might to raise to his feet.

“Not so fast,” Atrox mocked, “Your master would like a word with you,” he flicked his hand once more, and the large head made out of stone, flew across the ground crashed onto the top of the sith’s head, dropping him to the ground, killing him instantly.
Smiling, Atrox turned to face the large spec in the distance, which was the temple.

“Now, we shall have some fun. Her i come -,” but he was interrupted by a voice in his head.

‘No,” said a voice

“What?” said Atrox

“I said, no,” came the reply, “You are to stay here, until it is done. They will come to you, then you will bring them before me,”

“I have not travelled halfway across the galaxy, just to sit in the dark and wait for this moment!” snapped Atrox

Suddenly an immense pain erupted in his head, creating and explosion of anguish yells from Atrox, as he frantically tried to diminish the pain, dropping his lightsaber to the ground as he doubled over, pulling at his hair.

‘Go to the Ebon Hawk and wait there. In time, you will see, my young apprentice," The pain ceased in his head, and breathing heavily, Atrox stood back up to his full height.

“Fine,” is all he said. He hitched his lightsaber back to his belt and walked steadily, through the surrounding foliage and through the forest of old trees and ghosts that still tread there, on his way to the Ebon Hawk.

* * *

Nom stared in wonder and disbelief. Revan was trapped in the Force Cage, which was situated in the far corner of the room. While three Sith stood on the left and right of him, as the third one stood in front of him.
He could feel the pain emanating from Revan, as if it were his own.
Revan was kneeling in agony, as the three Sith sapped the will of the Force from him. The orangey substance emitting a bright light as it travelled from within the body of Revan, and out into the palm of the fellow Sith.
At the noise of the Turbo-lift doors opening, the three Sith lowered their palms, Revan looked up at Nom with a grim feature which was spread on his face; Nom not knowing whether it was a faint smile of relief or regret. The Sith turned fully around and faced Nom. Nom’s eyes flicking to each in turn.

“Did I come at a bad time?” said Nom, reaching for his lightsaber.

The middle sith raised his hand and the lightsaber shot out of Nom’s hand flew towards the Sith, but Nom raised his own hand and tried calling the lightsaber back to him; but that did was stop the saber in mid air, halfway between Nom and his enemy.

“Smart little one aren’t you,” sneered the Sith

“When will you idiots, stop calling me little one?” Nom replied agitated, “Your buddy said that to me before, and look at him now. Dead,”

“Enough,” said the Sith on the right, stepping forward. Hurry up and take care of him, while I continue with Revan,”

None, of you will be continue this little escapade of yours anyway. Because im not going to let you,” said Nom

“So naive,”

“No,” replied Nom, “Your just too stupid to realise something,”
Revan smiled in Nom’s direction and nodded.

“Oh? And what might that be?” asked the Sith

“That I am a Jedi, and you’re Sith,” said Nom simply.

“What?” snapped the Sith, confused, “What the hell, does that mean?”

“It means,” said Nom, replied, pulling back as hard as he could, as his lightsaber flew back towards his hand, and he ignited it, “The time of the Sith has ended. Now, prepare to pay for all the deaths you have caused,”

“I do not think so,” said the Sith, as he and the other two ignited their own Lightsabers.

“OK, you can do this,” Nom said to himself, “Let them come to you, the Force is my ally it will help me. Keep calm’

All three warriors surrounded Nom, bringing their Lightsabers above their head. The all attacked at once.

Nom ducked, parried one attack and brought his saber slashing across at the Sith’s side. Making him jump backwards, to avoid the parry. Nom seen through the Force, another attack directed at his back, he quickly tipped his hand downwards and he brought his lightsaber down to protect his back. He swiped his leg across hard and fast; he brought the sith to his knees. The next thing the sith knew was seeing a beam of light flash in front of him and proceeding through his chest, as his eyes closed and he saw no more.

The sith that were left yelled in anguish and rushed forward towards Nom. Using the Force to aide him, Nom leapt off his feet and produced a flip high enough so his feet brushed the ceiling, and he landed behind his enemies. Slashing one across the back of the knee’s and the other, a long cut down his back.

One sith fell, but the other, overcome with rage, went into a fury and started to swipe at Nom with everything he had. Lightsaber, along with his fists and feet.

Blocking most of the oncoming attacks, Nom was able to slice downwards, just before a red glow reached his stomach, and cutting across, he took the Sith’s fingers off, along with slicing the hilt in half; diminishing the red light.



As the Sith screamed in agony, Nom pierced him through the heart, silencing the undistinguishing babble. But to Nom’s notice, the other Sith was gone, and it was too late before he realised that the Sith did not run, but he had in fact moved along side the fight, and stalked behind Nom in the shadows. Nom quickly brought his lightsaber across, but he could not block the whole attack, as he felt considerable pain in the side of his gut; the acrid smell of burnt flesh filled his nostrils.

He gasped and fell to his knees as pain consumed all other thoughts. The Sith limped to in front of Nom, with gasps as he took every step. The backs of his knee making him cringe in pain, as the wound stretched.

“You have fought well, little one,” said the Sith admiringly, “I will give you that much honour,”

Nom fuelled himself with the Force as anger raged through his body; “How many times,” he whispered, “Have I told you, not to call me ‘little one’,”

He got to his feet, grabbing at his side; he noticed that all down his Robe was soaked with blood.

“And not only will I destroy you for annoying me with the continuous idiocy of you Sith, and slashing at my side,” Nom blinked, and said, “This was my only robe, and you’ve ruined it. That’s not very nice”

Nom quickly brought his palm up, facing towards the Sith and sneered, his eye’s glinting.

“Nom, no!” yelled Revan.

As Nom felt the rush of pure energy rush from all his body to the very edge of his fingertips, he produced the electricity, directing it at the surprised Sith. The room was filled with the piercing screams of the Sith as he rolled around in absolute pain and agony, the echoes of his screams bouncing from wall to wall. As soon as the screams stopped, Nom lowered his palm. He turned to Revan.

“Sorry, Revan,” he said weakly “I'm some Jedi, aren’t I?”

With that, he felt his eyelids close and he fell to the ground, as darkness took him. The last thing he saw was the door of the turbo-lift opening once more, and several figures running in. Some running to him as the others ran to Revan, before all consciousness left from his body.


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Old 01-16-2007, 11:05 AM   #93
Diego Varen
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Good Chapter and I'm looking foward to the next one, just so I can see who is after Revan.
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Old 01-16-2007, 06:51 PM   #94
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Yay, more chapters, sorry I haven't been replying much.

They're good chapters, but you have one continuous spelling error. It's Bastila not Bastilla.

All in all, good chapters, keep it up.


Yes
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Old 01-17-2007, 06:57 AM   #95
The_Catto
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CHAPTER 18

@Pottise: Thanks, and i hope your enjoying the story, thus far.
@Akuma: Thanks for the correction. I think i remember you saying something about that before, and i went alright for a while, but then i just started to have the double 'L' in there again, lol. Anyway, thanks for the comment. Most appreciated.

Anyways, here's the next chapter.

CHAPTER 18

As Nom felt his consciousness return to him, he did not open his eyes. He did however; hear voices, concerned and angry voices.

“What do you mean, Revan?” came Bastila’s voice

“I mean,” said Revan, clearly extremely annoyed, “That he murdered that Sith. He used power, which was of the Dark Side. A power I only saw Malak use,”

“He used a Dark Side power!” said Mission, “But surely, he didn’t mean it, did he? I mean, why would he use the Dark Side when he is a Jedi?”

“Im not very sure anymore if I made the right choice in deciding to train him,” came Revan’s reply. Nom had had enough.

“I am a Jedi,” he said forcefully, opening his eyes. They were still in the prison chamber? How long had he been out for, and why haven’t they left yet? But he pushed those questions back for later and continued: “It was just a slip, and it will never happen again,”

“It was more than just a slip from what Revan has been telling us Nom. Even a slip can lead you to the Dark Side,” said Bastila, frowning at Nom

“Sure, and you would definitely know, wouldn’t you?” said Nom defiantly, “Did you tell him of your little slip? Even before we got into the temple?”

“What happened?” said Revan, concerned, looking towards Bastila.

“It can wait,” replied Bastila harshly, staring at Nom, “First we need to get out of the temple,”

Nom let out a small laugh “Yeah, that would be right wouldn’t it?” he said.

“Nom!” hissed Mission, “Why are you speaking like this?”

Nom blinked and looked at Mission. Suddenly, the anger swept from his body, causing him to fall to his knees and gasp.

“What is it?” asked Revan, rushing to his side and lifting him up.

“I – I’m not sure,” replied Nom. He turned to Bastila “I’m sorry for the things what I said. I don’t know why I said them; it was as if like … something had taken over me. It won’t happen again,” Looking around, he suddenly realised that not all of the company were present. “Where’s Jolee?” he asked

“We need to get out of here,” said Revan suddenly before Bastila could reply, “He’s coming”

“Jonas?” asked Bastila

“I feel him too,” whispered Visas

“Come! We are not yet strong enough to fight him,” said Revan, as he ran to the turbo lift doors.

“Wait,” said Nom, “That’s the way he’ll be coming from. We need to find some other way, to get out of here,”

“And how do you propose we do that?” said Atton, “In case you haven’t noticed, there are no other doors, or windows in the room,”

“We have Lightsabers,” Nom pointed out

“Yes,” agreed Atton, “But we’re also underground,”

“Ahh, well … this could be a problem,” said Nom.

The rest silently agreed with him, as they waited for the Turbo-lift doors to open.

* * *
Well, we’ve stalled long enough,” said Revan, “This is the only way to go, if we are to escape,” He ran to the turbo-lift, just as the doors opened.

With a gasp he stepped back; the rest ignited their Lightsabers, as the doors slid to the side.

“Jolee!” exclaimed Revan, “About bloody time you showed up old man!”

“Now, sonny. Don’t thank me yet, we’re still yet to get out of this hell hole,”

“Right,” said Revan, turning around to the others, he said: “Well, are you coming or not?”

They all rushed forwards and piled into the turbo-lift. It was a tight fit, but they all made it.

“Zaalbar, that better be your crossbow!” warned Carth

The rest laughed softly. The first real laugh they had shared for quite some time.

“Get ready,” said Revan, “We don’t know what will be on the other sides of these doors when they open,”

“I see you’ve got your lightsaber back,” said Nom

“Yeah, the fools left it in one of the security lockers, which mind you, was as easy as shooting a Krayt dragon at close range for Mission,” replied Revan

“Nice job,” said Nom, turning to Mission

“Thanks,” she said brightly

“Be on your guard, we’re almost there,” said Revan

They felt the turbo-lift shudder to a stop, and the doors slid open. Ready switch on his lightsaber, Nom quickly jumped out, followed by everyone else.
“Hmm … well this is weird,” he said, deactivating his lightsaber.

The hallway was empty. Only the echoes of their footsteps occupied the ends of the corridor.

“Indeed,” said Revan

“Well, let’s not waste time for people to actually come down here, lets go already!” said Atton

“Always on the move,” said Revan grimly, as they started to proceed down the corridor at a quickened pace.

* * *

They made it back up the stairs all right, but they came to a halt as they stopped in front of the blocked tunnel, which resulted from the powerful Force Wave they had induced earlier before.

“Looks like I missed out on something good,” said Revan as he stared around at the dead Sith that littered the flor around them.

“We’ll have enough time for jokes later Rev,” said Carth “For now, can we just concentrate on getting through this alive, please?”

They looked to the side, and noticed a flight of stairs led to a floor above. “This way,”
They ran up the stair and proceeded down the corridor. Noticing on the wall and floor that bricks had also fallen off from this side.

‘Wow, was the Force Wave really that powerful?’ Nom thought to himself.

They got to the end of the hallway and noticed another flight of steps, which led down to the floor they needed to be on. They bounded down the stair as fast as they could, and headed toward the open door.

Mission, Carth, Zaalbar, Jolee, Atton, Mira, and Visas all managed to get through the door, before somehow, it got slammed shut. Nom slammed against the door, and fell to the ground. Bastila stopped and nearly fell backwards, but Revan caught her, just before she hit the ground.
Suddenly there was a harsh laugh.

“You honestly didn’t think it would be that easy did you?” said Jonas, as he leapt from the second floor and landed in front of Revan, Bastila and Nom.

Jonas looked to Revan, Bastila and then his eyes settled on Nom.
“You, im most interested in. You managed to kill, my three most trusted, and powerful servants. Single-handedly,”
He nodded, “Impressive … Very impressive,”

“Let them go,” said Revan, “They have no part in this, it’s you and me. It’s always been between us. Even in during the Wars, you were always so cocky, and trying to surpass me, in both strength and intelligence,” he smiled, “And I should add, that you have failed miserably,”

“Fine,” said Jonas. He flicked his hand, and the doors opened back up, revealing a seriously concerned group of people.

“Jonas!” yelled Mira

Jonas looked behind Revan, to the group behind him and said:
“Ahh, yes. I see that you have brought some of my old servants. Yes, they were most useful,”

“You arrogant, son of a –,” but Mira was cut off, as Bastila, screamed furiously and lunged towards Jonas, both ends of her sabre-staff ignited.

“Bastila, no!” yelled Revan, but it was too late. Jonas was ready for the attack and laughed as she tried to hit him, but all attempts useless.

“Revan, take Nom and go!” she yelled, “He is the only way for us to save the Republic, I know it!”

“Bastila, I won’t leave you!” he yelled back.

She looked back towards him, as Jonas did a back flip and landed on top of the huge pile of rubble which poured out from the collapsed tunnel.

“You must,” is all she said. With that she gathered the Force, and used it to push both Revan and Nom through the giant doors, and close them again, before Revan could get back in,

The last thing Nom saw before the doors fully closed, was his master jump up and went to strike down at the Jedi Exile.

He looked down to the ground in disbelief, whilst Carth and Atton raced towards them, trying to get them up standing, as flashes of laser shots came raining down on top of them from the towers above.

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Old 01-17-2007, 11:01 AM   #96
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Jonas is back. I like the Jedi Exile more than Revan and I always have. Anyway, another good Chapter and I hope Bastila can escape from Jonas' wrath.
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Old 01-17-2007, 12:16 PM   #97
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great chapters! i cant wait to see more. not to mention what happens to nom. Keep writing, great fic so far
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Old 01-18-2007, 07:40 AM   #98
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@Pottsie: yeah, i liked Exile more than Revan. (I liked TSL btter than KotOR)
Thanks to you as well, Darth Randus. All comments are most welcome and appreciated .

Anyway, here's another chapter (Man, im on a roll!). Ive also put in a little twist as well. I've did some research and im pretty sure it wont contradict with anything. So hope you all enjoy it.

CHAPTER 19

“C’mon!” yelled Carth as the laser bolts continued to spew down from the turrets, “Revan, we can save her later. Do you want to die here?”

That question awoke Revan’s dormant mind back to life, and he realised the situation he was in.
He jumped up and with a last glance at the temple; he turned and sprinted off with the rest of the group. Dodging shots here and there as they continued to rain down upon their heads, until finally they entered the trees and were a safe distance from the oncoming volleys.

“Do you think they will come after us?” panted Carth, when they finally stopped

Revan looked as if he took no notice of what Carth said; he was staring back in the direction from whence they came. Pondering in his head at what might be happening to Bastilla as they just stood there. Doing nothing.

“No,” he replied, vaguely, “At least, not yet anyway. They will wait until nightfall, when they have the element of surprise. That’s when we must fight them. Spring the trap on them. They wont know what hit ‘em, until it’s too late,”

“Listen, Revan,” said Nom; “I know you want to get Bastila back. We all do, it’s just the same for when we were going in there to get you we have to think about this. Come up with a proper formalized plan, then just going in there, slicing and dicing as we see fit!”

Revan looked at Nom, “What did you mean earlier?”

“What do you mean?” asked Nom, confused

“I mean, why did you say those things earlier, when we were in the holding room,”

“I told you Revan, I don’t know what came over me, I just -,”

“Not that,” said Revan, waving his hand impatiently, “I’m talking about Bastila’s ‘slip’. What did you mean by it?”

“Well,” started Nom. He wanted to make sure he put this into the right words, and not to make Revan angry, “It’s just, you should have seen her, Revan. It was as if, all thought of rationalization had diminished completely within Bastila’s eyes. The glint in her eyes was enough to make even a group of Terentaks think twice about trying to argue with her,”
“It was scary to think that something such as love could do that to a person. She activated her lightsaber when Carth tried to argue with her. I thought something was going to happen,”

“But thanks to you, Nom,” piped up Carth, “Nothing did happen, you and you alone were able to talk some sense into her,”

“I just,” Revan let out a yell, “Why did she do that? Why did she make us run? I could have stopped this there and then! What foolish thought, did she have!”

“I can tell you Revan,” said Carth. He looked down at Nom, “It’s you. She has a feeling. We all do. Your somethin’ special kid. She wants to keep you alive because you are the only hope for the Republic to survive,” he turned back to Revan laughed, “Sorry Rev, but it looks like you’ve got some competition in the ‘Saving the Galaxy’ department,”

Nom tried to suppress a smile, but it was too hard. He ached all over, his side had been healed by Revan when he was unconscious, but that didn’t stop it from hurting considerably.
Carth looked back at Nom, and seen that he was almost asleep where he was sitting.

“Rev, we need rest. Lets head back to the ship, have an hour or two rest. Then we will discuss on how to rescue Bastilla, OK?”

“Fine,” replied Revan, “I don’t need any rest, ive had enough for the past week. So I will scout around, see if there’s any Sith who need dealing with,”

“Please don’t do anything foolish,” said Carth, looking at Revan.

“Hey, it’s me!” said Revan, smiling mockingly.

“That’s what im afraid of,” muttered Carth


* * *


“The Hawk is just past this thick foliage here,” said Carth, “Its considerable hidden for the size and of which where it is,”

“What do you mean?” asked Revan

“You’ll see,” replied Carth

As they past through the thick trees, getting pricked and their robes getting torn in some places by large sharp nettles, they came to the Ebon Hawks ‘docking port’.

“OK, now I see what you mean,” said Revan, walking towards the edge of the large cliff, “This place really is hidden isn’t it?”

“Sure is,” said Carth, walking over to stand next to him.

“Wait,” said Revan, “its not that well hidden as you first may think,”

“What is it?” asked Carth

“Don’t move,” Revan warned, “There’s a presence to the left through the trees. Hiding its power considerably well, but still not enough,”

“Can you make it out, who it might be?”

Revan closed his eyes and tried to focus on the identity of the mysterious presence. But he opened his eyes back up.

“No,” he said grimly, “I’ve never felt such a thing before. Such a powerful wave of energy pulsates from it. It’s overwhelming,”

“We need to get rid of him, or her, whoever it is quickly. Before they get rid of us,” said Carth

“Don’t worry Carth, my old friend,” replied Revan, looking up at Carth, “I’m here, remember?”
“Tell me why that does not comfort me,” said Carth smiling

“Let’s go back to the Hawk,” said Revan, “I’ll take care of our visitor,”

“Fair enough,” replied Carth

They walked back to the ship and told the rest of the group of the onlooker.

“That funny, I didn’t even sense him,” said Nom, quietly

“He’s hiding his power considerably well,” said Revan, “And he has intentions. Serious one’s,”

“Well, what are we going to do?” asked Mira

“I’ll take care of it,” assured Revan, unhitching his lightsaber.

“We’re over here if you need help,” said Nom, smiling, “In case you get … too tired. You know, because of your age and all,’

“Oh, you’re a funny one aren’t you?” Revan replied, pretending to be insulted. He wasn’t that old.

Walking over to the space between the Ebon Hawk and the cliff, Revan pretended to go over to the cliff, but he stopped and said: “You can come out now, whoever you are,”

Hearing the rustles of leaves and breaking twigs, Revan looked to the side to see the newcomer. And what he saw, made he’s his insides squirm in disgust.

The persons face as mangled. Half of his nose had been sliced off, there were large scars across his cheeks, and the whites of ones of his eyes were not white at all, but yellow.
The person, if it could be called that, smiled, revealing several jagged teeth.

“Jeeze, what happened to you?” asked Revan

“Sometimes, sacrifices have to be made in order to achieve the things what you want.”

“And let me guess,” said Revan, “That would be power?”

“Cant have too much power, “ replied the stranger.

“So, let me get this going then,” started Revan, “Are you here to kill us, or not?”
A sneer started to ripple itself across the strangers face.

“Why, yes. Yes, I am,” he said

“Hmm … Thought so, “ said Revan.
He ignited his lightsaber, gathered the Force underneath his feet and lunged himself through the air to land in front of the stranger. Bringing his lightsaber down in a slashing movement, but the stranger parried it and jumped to the side, bringing his own so it would slash at Revan’s head.
Revan ducked, and pushed a power Force Wave into the strangers gut, throwing him backwards ten feet.

“I never got the pleasure of knowing your name,” said Revan

“My name, is Darth Atrox.” He replied, before lunging towards Revan, lightsaber heading straight towards his chest.
Spinning, Revan evaded the attack, kicked Atrox’s legs out from under him, so it made him crash to the ground with a grunt.

“Enough?” asked Revan.

“Hmph,” is all the stranger said, as he leant back, kicked Revan in the chest with the bottom of his feet, then he kicked himself back up from the ground, back into a fighting stance.

“Impressive,” said Revan

“You’ll’ find I’m full of surprises,” Atrox said.
Revan raised an eyebrow, “Can’t wait,” he said sarcastically.

Atrox yelled in anger and sprinted towards Revan, pulling out a quarter length saber as he went.

Surprised by the sudden appearance of the new weapon, Revan missed blocking the second stab to his leg, and fell to the ground in pain. Victorious, Atrox lowered his lightsaber to Revan’s throat.

“It’s funny,” he whispered, “You were just as I expected Revan. Weak, withering … Dieing.”

A sudden surge of power streamed throughout Revan’s body and exploded. Creating an avalanche of air proceeding from his body, pushing Atrox away just enough for Revan to get the opportunity to get himself back up.

“And, now you can see, ‘Darth’ Atrox … I am full of surprises.”

“Excellent.” Said Atrox.


* * *


“Do you think he needs help?” asked Atton

“No,” said Nom. Carth agreed.

“When we all we fighting, all those years back. We had certain energy, an energy that could sustain us even for the longest for battles. Enough to keep us going, until our opponents wore out, but not we just kept on going, no matter what.
“But I’m afraid, even if most of us don’t want to admit it (I certainly don’t) but we have all lost some of the energetic selves we used to be. But ... I think Revan has found that again, and whatever he may think, or what we may think. Nothing can take that away from him, now,”

The others looked on as Carth concentrated on Revan. After all these years, he has finally been able to talk to him again. He felt, in himself that everybody who had been on the Ebon Hawk on its voyage to find the Star Forge, had created a certain bond between them all. And without Revan, that bond was just not complete.
But now that Revan was with them again, he still did not feel that that bond had resurfaced at all yet. Whether it being too long since any of them had seen Revan to even remember him as the saviour of the galaxy, or whether it was because of Revan himself; separating himself from the group and cutting the bond into threads of uncertainty.

“You alright, Carth?” asked Nom

“Yeah, im fine,” he replied, not taking his eyes away from the battle, “Im fine,”

Nom didn’t look away from Carth straight away, wanting to know what he was thinking, but he did not even want to know the results of what would happen if he were to probe Carth’s mind.
So he withdrew that thought immediately and he himself, looked towards the fight that was commencing.

* * *

“I don’t think Revan can keep this up much longer,” said Atton, leaning over to talk to Mira, so no one else would hear.

“Didn’t you hear what Carth said, laser brain?” said Mira irritably, unable to tear her eyes away from Revan. “Just look at him fight! It’s more like a dance if you ask me, the way he gracefully swings his lightsaber to block ever oncoming attack from this Darth Atrox, it’s compelling,”

“Your weird, you know that?” said Atton, turning away looking out towards the trees of the forest.


* * *


“So, Revan. You power has grown since the last time we met,” said Atrox.

“I don’t remember ever being acquainted with you,” said Revan.

“I thought you wouldn’t, it’s been a long time ago since we first met,” Atrox replied with a sneer.

“Well, enlighten me.” Said Revan, “Who are you exactly?”

“I was in the Mandalorian Wars, under your command. At that last battle at Malachor V, when you sent us to our deaths. But you failed with me, Revan. I saw through your intentions and retreated back to my ship and took off. I saw and felt all the deaths that you had caused from the sky,”

“I took off into space and went to return to my home. But when I got there, did you know what I found?” when Revan shook his head, Atrox continued,

“Nothing. Nothing at all, as my home was destroyed. And did you know that I found out who destroyed my home? It was you. You destroyed my home, my life, and my family. My mother and father are gone, my wife is lost and I cannot find my son. As far as I looked upon that planet, I could not find him. That was seventeen years ago, however I have never stopped searching. And nor will I stop searching until I find him.”

“I’m sorry for your loss-,” started Revan, but was cut off by a shriek of laughter from Atrox.

“No your not! I know you are not, don’t lie to me.” He said, as his eyes filled with hate and disgust. “You are the reason I have lost everything in my life, and the one reason that I will gain enough satisfaction to fill my life again. For when I kill you.”

“Your words are full of hatred and pain,” replied Revan, “But don’t live like this.”

“Ready to die, Revan?” asked Atrox, getting adjusting himself in a fighting stance.

Revan sighed and re-ignited his saber, “I was born ready.” is all he said, as they lunged at each other at the same time. Aiming to kill.


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Old 01-18-2007, 11:05 AM   #99
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Surprised? Sort of. It used to be a lot more surprising the first time with Luke and Vader. Anyway, good Chapter and I'm looking foward to more. I also prefer TSL to KOTOR.

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Old 01-24-2007, 04:51 AM   #100
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Thanks once again Pottsie, here's just a question though.

Do you think i should go along with a storyline as Atrox as Revan's brother, or just continue to write a more informative storyline with rescuing Bastila and defeating the Unknown threat?

I'm asking because, i would like to write to the readers satisfactions and just to my own. So what do you think?

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Old 01-24-2007, 11:58 AM   #101
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It is up to you Mr_BFA. This is your Fanfic and do what you think is best.
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Old 01-24-2007, 01:04 PM   #102
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I agree with Pottsie... Its your story, and its your decision. I personally would not mind it either way.
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Old 01-25-2007, 12:05 AM   #103
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OK, Well im going to change the fact of Atrox being his brother, but the next update wont be for a while, because, im moving! ... And not just to another city mind you, i meant to a whole new state altogether! ... but one sad part to it, there will be no internet, so i will have to wait till i go to a net cafe to post the chapter. And worse yet, there will be no computer at all! So thats my main motication to get a job as soon as possible.

Well, im off on my trip tomorrow so i wont be on for a while, so fair well! until next time (probably in a month or so, with another 2 chapters, and edited version on chapter 19.

EDIT: sorry for mis-spelling, typed really extremely bullet paced fastness.
And @Pottsie: Congrats to 4000th post!

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Old 01-25-2007, 12:11 AM   #104
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr_BFA
OK, Well im going to change the fact of Atrox being his brother, but the next update wont be for a while, because, im moving! ... And not just to another city mind you, i meant to a whole new state altogether! ... but one sad part to it, there will be no internet, so i will have to wait till i go to a net cafe to post the chapter. And worse yet, there will be no computer at all! So thats my main motication to get a job as soon as possible.

Well, im off on my trip tomorrow so i wont be on for a while, so fair well! until next time (probably in a month or so, with another 2 chapters, and edited version on chapter 19.

EDIT: sorry for mis-spelling, typed really extremely bullet paced fastness.
And @Pottsie: Congrats to 4000th post!
Sorry to see that you're moving, and won't be in contact for some time. Where you're going, have fun and good luck. And also, sorry I havn't commented on your fiction. I'm not all the way done with reading it. But so far it's awesome, so I look forward for your return.

Good luck.


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Old 01-25-2007, 01:19 AM   #105
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Thanks Mr_BFA. I hope moving is alright for you and I'm looking foward to seeing you online again soon.
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Old 02-07-2007, 03:02 AM   #106
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Hey all, i've edited that last bit of chapter 19. But sorry, no other chapters yet. Should have some up in the next couple of days, if i can get around to writing some. I'm back at my old place for a while, it just didnt work out where i was at the current time (absolutely no jobs were available everywhere i looked).
So, ill be on more often.

Anyway, the story should be getting more interesting soon. I just wish Revan and Atrox will hurry up and finish the fight thats all, lol.

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Old 02-09-2007, 01:03 AM   #107
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CHAPTER 20

CHAPTER 20

Bastila screamed in agony. Acolytes were surrounded her as they slowly seared her flesh with the tip of their lightsabers.

“Enough!” came Jonas’ voice; the acolytes stood back and deactivated their sabers, “Perhaps, now you will cooperate?” he said, walking right up to Bastila’s face.

“You can do what you will, Sith,” she said stubbornly, “I will not turn.”

“Now, now, don’t be like that,” smiled Jonas, “You were one of us once, were you not? You have felt the power that can be unlocked when he touch the dark side, the urge licking at your insides to grasp that power and unleash it! Why do you deny that urge?”

“Because, it’s not the way!” said Bastila, sweat pouring down her face.
“Pity,” replied Jonas, “We could have used a warrior like you.” He walked to his acolytes and said loud enough so Bastila could hear, “She is no use to us, kill her!”

A deep sickening feeling filled the pit of Bastila’s stomach; she did not want to die, but nor did she want to turn to the Dark Side. “Wait,” she said; Jonas stopped and looked back around to face her, a sneer on his face, “Yes?” he asked

“I do not want to die,” she said, “But I stand by what I said, I will not turn to the Dark Side, but I may have some information what may be of some use to you.” Jonas raised an eyebrow, “And, that would be?”

“There is someone here, on this planet, more powerful than you, more powerful than any of us. And with only his power, he could destroy all life on this planet with just a flick of his hand if he wanted to,”

“And why hasn’t he done that?” Jonas mocked

“Because,” replied Bastila, “He wants you!”

* * *

Revan felt Bastila’s pain for just a second before she blocked him out. He did not know what was happening to her, but he didn’t like it; he had to finish this now.

“During all of this fight,” he said, looking Atrox in the eye, “We have grown more weary. You have had losses because of me, I admit that, but I also admit I have not renounced my old ways, and I have done things to make up for what I have done and although you have more power than me-,” he kicked Atrox’s legs out from under him and he fell to the ground, “- you have forgotten one thing.”

“And what is that?” spat Atrox

Revan smiled, “I’m the ‘Saviour of the Galaxy’.” And with that, Revan brought his saber down and cleaved the Sith’s head straight off with a clean cut; leaving a surprised and angry expression on the face as the head rolled away. Revan let out a long sigh of relief and switched his saber off.

He felt Nom walk up behind him and turned to face the young man, “Are you alright?” he asked Revan

“Im fine,” assured Revan, “It has just been a long while since I had had an intense fight such as that. He was extremely powerful.”

“Listen, Revan,” said Nom, “Whilst you were fighting, I felt, well … Bastila -,” Revan held up his hand to stop Nom, “I know, I felt it too,” He replied, “There isn’t much time, I would go now if I could, but I feel like I would not even get passed the front door im so exhausted!” Nom smiled, “It will be alright,” he said, letting Revan lean on him for support, “We will get her back, I promise.”

“Its funny,” said Revan; Nom looked at him questioningly, “I should be giving you this advice, not the other way around. She was more of your master than me.” He explained, as they entered the Ebon Hawk and Revan went to lie down in the Medical room.

* * *

Whilst Revan was sleeping, the rest of the crew were sitting outside of the ship. The sun had set and the white orb had risen to hang in the black sky.

“… I dunno,’ said Atton, “I have a bad feeling about this.”

“You always have a bad feeling about something,” said Mira

“Yeah, and that must mean, im always right, because whenever I have I have a bad feeling about something, I’m right about something aren’t I?”

“Shut up,” exasperated Mira, “Isn’t it time for you to get some rest?”

“Playing the motherly role now are you?” he sneered

“Both of you,” said Carth, “Cut it out! Seriously, you both act like your bloody married or something.” Atton and Mira smirked.

“Revan!” said Nom suddenly. The others turned to look at the boarding ramp and Revan was in fact standing there, an expression on his face that none of his companions could tell what it was.
He walked down and went to the edge of the cliff and just stood there, gazing into the deepening depths of the trees and into the distance. Even though it was too dark to see the temple where his lover was being tortured, he knew exactly where it was.
Carth looked at the others and seeing all their blank faces he said, “I’ll go talk to him.”

He got up and walked over to Revan, and placing a hand on hs shoulder he asked, “How are you feeling, Rev?”

“The love of my life is being tortured as we speak, how do you think I feel?”

“Let me re-phrase that,” said Carth, uncomfortably, “What do you plan to do to get her back?”

“Easy,” Revan replied, “Walk in there, find her and cut down everyone who gets in my path.”
Carth nodded with a small smile, “I like it. Simple, easy to remember.”
Revan released a shout of anger and dropped down to sit on a large boulder. After a few silent minutes, without looking up, Revan said, “Are our sins, ever forgiven?”

Carth continued to look at him intently, “I’ve never tried.” He said
Revan looked up, “You mean … hmm … never tried,” he got up and looked out to the distance again. He nodded his head, apparently finally deciding about something, looked to Carth and said, “Well, im going to try.” And with that, he jumped down from the cliff and landed to the soft forest floor below.


Very, very short chapter here. Mainly because its building towards a longer chapter for the next one i put up. I also put in a quote from a very awesome film if any of you can find it. Just remember, there is no prize to whoever finds it lol.


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Old 02-09-2007, 01:25 AM   #108
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Another good Chapter Mr_BFA. I like build-up to some Chapters and this does it well. I wonder what Jonas will do to Bastila. Looking foward to more and I'm not sure where the quote is from.
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Old 02-09-2007, 01:39 AM   #109
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Thanks Pottsie ... uhh, i mean .. Topsite ... (That really got me the first time i seen it lol, i didn't know who it was until i looked at the post count and re-arranged the letters)

So yeah, the next chapter will be longer. Not long to go now, (I think) till the ending, what that will consist of ... hell, that's something what i would like to know as well!

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Old 02-10-2007, 02:56 AM   #110
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Poor Bastila! She keeps getting captured and tortured by the Sith! Just want some clarification fi you don't mind... What do you mean when Carth says "I've never tried" in response to Revan asking whether sins are ever forgiven?



The sun goes down and the sky reddens, pain grows sharp.
light dwindles. Then is evening
when jasmine flowers open, the deluded say.
But evening is the great brightening dawn
when crested cocks crow all through the tall city
and evening is the whole day
for those without their lovers

-Kuruntokai 234, translated by A.K. Ramanujan

[Fic] Shreds of a Dying Belief
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Old 02-13-2007, 06:59 AM   #111
The_Catto
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Well, Beehoon. I find to think of Carth as a hard willed, thick skinned kind of guy, who holds everything to himself. Let's hardly any emotion out into the open willingly, and hardly wants to admit that he's wrong, or done something that he should not have had.

I'll start with Revan firstly (it will help explain the answer to your question, hopefully, lol).
He thinks, (in my point of view) that, whatever he does, he will never be able to make up for anything that he has done in the past, no matter how much he wants to. But he feels that he can at least do what ever he can to the people around him, so he will never fall, again.

Now, for Carth. For the things what he has done in the past, he thinks that he does not need to try and undo any of them, hence why, he's never tried in making his sins forgiven. (For example: wanting to get revenge on Saul Karath).

Anyway, thats my opinion and view on the question and i hope that that will clear it up for you

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Old 02-13-2007, 10:07 AM   #112
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CHAPTER 21

Yay! Its finally official, this story is past the 100 page mark on 102 pages on microsoft word! W0ot!!!!!! hmm ... anyways, now that ive got that out of my system, lets get back to the story, shall we? lol

Carefully, Silently, Revan pressed on through the night until the large temple came back into view. The darkness surrounding it was even more pressing then that of the night sky. Accentuating the power of what it held within. As he looked high above, with the Force as his aide, he could make out the sentries posted along the walls and high turrets.

“This is going to be more easy than what I thought.” Said Revan to himself, smiling.

Knowing that he could not possibly make it into the temple via the great oak front doors, he gathered pressure underneath his feet and launched himself up high, the wind rushing through his hair and cloak as he went. He landed on a small pass-way between two turrets and slowly walked into the turret on his left.
No light could be seen as he walked down the case of swirling stairs, he walked carefully as not to take a wrong step.

As he descended, the staircase became brighter and he started to hear voices. Slowly he crept his way down until the stairs stopped and there was a long hallway and several doors branching from either end. As he got to the first doorway he heard the voices cease, suddenly.

“What was that?” asked one of them

“Not sure, but I don’t like the sound of it!” replied the other, “You should go check it out.”

“Me!” said the other, “Why me?” On and on the bickered, and Revan thought to himself, ‘Jeeze, sounds like something out of a bad hologame’

Walking in the room and watching the guards whip around in surprise, Revan smiled and said, “Hey fella’s,” and with a flick of his wrist, he sent the two guards flying in both directions and slamming hard on the wall. He walked back out of the room and down the hallway, encountering guards in the different room as he went; but fortunately he was able to continue forward unnoticed.
He reached out in the Force and felt Bastila’s presence, but to his horror, it was only a faint whisper. Pinpointing the precise location of where she was situated, Revan ran to the end of the hall and sped up through another set of staircase. He came to the main Atrium and gazed about; there was no one what so ever. Knowing that he had no time to answer such riddles, he ran down a flight of stairs and into a room on his left. Following the hallway, back down to the lower levels, where he was, Revan fled down the stairs and stopped only until he was waiting as the turbo lift jolted to a stop and the doors opened.

* * *

“We should have gone with him,” said Nom, as he spoke to Carth. They were sitting at the cliff, staring at the dark speck at which was the temple, where Bastila and now Revan were, “He will need our help, he cannot fight this on his own.”

“No,” said Carth, “He can, and he will. It’s his fight now, we cannot intervene.”

“I still don’t like it,” replied Nom, “I came to get all of you, but for what?”

“Maybe,” said Carth, “Revan knew that we needed to be here for a certain reason. But whatever that reason is, it’s got me.”
Nom looked to the ground and he gathered the Force to levitate a stone and threw it over the cliffs edge.
“What do you call this planet?” asked Carth suddenly

“Alzuria.” He replied

“What does it mean?”

Nom thought for a moment, “Well, ive never really thought of that before. Long ago, when the first settlers came to this planet, they had their own language and strange powers. They called it Alzuria, and the best of what I can think of (because I’ve looked at old scripts written in this Ancient language) is that: Alzur means Destiny and Ria, means land. But when I think about it, I must be going wrong somewhere because I don’t think they would have called it, ‘Destiny land’,” he scoffed at his own joke, “The sentence structure must be different then ive concluded, because it cannot just be those two words.”

“Land of Destiny?” suggested Carth.

“I think you may be right,” said Nom

Nom looked over his shoulder to see what the others were doing and gasped, Carth spun around and looked at what had caught Nom’s gaze. “Carth,” said Nom, “The reason as to why we are here … I think, it just presented itself.”

* * *

Revan looked over to the far corner of the room and spotted Bastila in the same Force cage what he himself was in. He ran over to the controls, deactivated it and sped over to her, taking her hand in his.

“Bastila, my love,” he said, “What have they done to you?”

Her eyelids started to flutter and she slowly opened them. She whispered his name and he leant in closer to hear what she was saying.

“Revan … “ she whispered, each word more difficult to say aloud than the last “Why did you come back? I thought … its … Revan … it’s a trap!”

Before Revan could ask her what she meant, he heard laughter behind him. Turning around, he saw two Sith Lords standing by the entrance of the turbo lift.

“Trapped again, Revan.” The one on the left said, as he produced his reddish saber; the other Sith Lord followed in suite.

“We’ll see,” said Revan, igniting his own blue blade, walking to the centre of the room, “Was it you who did that to her?” he asked as he pointed to the deep scars on Bastila’s face and arms.

The Sith smiled, “Why, yes,” he said, “Yes, it was.”

“Your first mistake.” Replied Revan

“Oh?” asked the Sith, raising an eyebrow

“Yup,” said Revan, “And your second mistake was in thinking that I would not be able to get passed you.”

“I doubt that,” said the Sith as he lunged through the air towards Revan. Bringing his lightsaber upwards, he was able to sear the front of the sith’s uniform and burn the skin underneath. With a grunt of pain the sith sped around for another attack; Revan dodged the oncoming swirl of the saber and brought his own lightsaber downwards, searing the clothing, skin, and muscle tissue in his arm, cutting through the bone and slicing the sith’s arm off completely, before lunging the blade through his back.

“What!” yelled the Sith, apparently shocked by his partners death.

Revan walked forward, lifted his saber high above his head and with all the strength he could muster, he brought it down onto the Sith’s saber. Sliding his blade down, Revan sliced his opponents hilt in half, producing hisses and sparks flying from it. He gathered the Force into the palm of his hand and pushed the sith back into the turbo lift doors as hard as he could; Revan heard the bones of his spine snap against the door.

He rushed back over to Bastila and lifted her up from the bench. Lifting her arm up and around his shoulders, he let her lean all her weight against his, and they struggled to the door and ascended to the higher levels. When the turbo lift opened back up to reveal the hallway; Revan noticed that it was still empty. But he wasn’t sure now, because of the cloaking devices which the Sith lords downstairs had wore. He now cursed himself for not thinking to grab them before the entered the turbo lift.
Slowly they walked up the stairs seeing that the Atrium was empty once again, the descended the stairs and headed towards the front doors; Clapping filled the room bouncing off the walls and echoing ten times louder than what it would have been if it was outside.

“Well done, Revan!” said Jonas as he descended from a flight of stairs to their left, “Well done, indeed! I never would have thought that you would have gotten this far.”

“I’m unpredictable.” Replied Revan, as he softly lowered Bastila to the ground.

“That you are,” laughed Jonas, “And you will find,” he said, “That I am too!” he said as used the Force to pull Bastila towards him. Revan quickly grabbed his lightsaber and ran towards Jonas, “Ah,” said Jonas, and he put Revan into a full body stasis. Lifting Bastila up from the ground by the scruff of her neck, he said, “She is beautiful, isn’t she?” caressing her face with his hand.

He unhitched his lightsaber from his belt and said, “It is a pity.”

It happened in a flash of bright red light; Jonas produced the blade of his saber and lunged it through Bastilla like a hot knife through butter. Her scream echoed through Revan’s ears as he watched, horrified at his own helplessness at his lover’s pain. Jonas deactivated his saber and threw Bastila’s body towards Revan.

“Sorry, Rev,” he said with a hint of a smile, “But it had to be done.”
He let Revan free of the Stasis, and watched as Revan fell to his knees and went to Bastila’s body. Feeling the small warmth there was dwindling away from her face; he tried to pour his strength into her, but she would not let him, she had blocked him out completely.

“Bastila, no,” he whispered, “I should have been able to help you, I should have been able to save you!”

She slowly opened her eyes, and whispered, “You did save me.” Then her eyes closed and her breathing ceased as her hand fell limp to the ground, as she let go of her one last breath of life.

Holding back whatever emotions were fighting to break out and escape him, he softly place her head down on the cold stone floor and stood up with his back to Jonas.

“As I said, Rev,” said Jonas, “It had to be done.”

Revan unhitched the hilt from his belt, “Indeed,” he said, “And so … was this!” he yelled, as he gather the Force underneath his feet and propelled himself backwards through the air and landing right in front of Jonas.

The fight what followed was one of the greatest fights in the known history of that planet. Their strokes of the saber created waves of pure energy what erupted into ferocious storms of intense heat and power. Their feet hardly touching the ground and their eyes never leaving the gaze of the other.

“You have taken away from me, my whole life,” Revan, as he parried an attack from Jonas, “My whole future and my one reason for not giving up on this galaxy.”

“You have just learnt the truth of life, Revan,” replied Jonas, “No matter how hard we try, no matter how hard we strive to succeed: we all die, bitter and alone, with no one to guide us and no one to comfort us. That’s why learning power is the true meaning of life, so one can learn to not fear the necessity of death, but for death to fear the necessity to keep on living. Not being able to take your life away until you see fit!”

“You are blinded Jonas,” said Revan, “And if you cannot see for yourself, the destruction what you have caused, the importance of all the lives you have taken, then I must show you the true meaning of being a Jedi!”

Revan elbowed Jonas in the jaw, brought his fist to slam against his stomach and brought his forehead to clash against the tip of Jonas’ nose. With blood protruding from his nose and his jaw throbbing, Jonas fell back and landed on the stone floor; Revan brought the very edge of his saber to Jonas’ throat.

“Revan,” said Jonas, “Do you know what will come about if you are to kill me?” Revan looked into Jonas’s black eyes and saw, for a second, a glimmer of some kind … but it was gone not even a moment later.”

“What would that be, Jonas?” said Revan

Jonas looked back into Revan’s stare and said with a smile on his face, “It would be the death of the Republic.”


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Old 02-13-2007, 10:53 AM   #113
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Yes, a duel with Revan and Jonas. I'm looking foward to more Mr_BFA and I like it. Congrats on getting over one hundred pages on Word.
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Old 02-15-2007, 04:55 AM   #114
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CHAPTER 22

“What do you mean, Jonas?” asked Revan, keeping the flaming tip of pulsating energy and light directed at Jonas’ throat.

“You always were a soft one, Rev,” replied Jonas, laughing softly, “If you let me get up, I will tell you.”

“You know I won’t do that.” Said Revan

“Fine,” spat Jonas, “If you kill me, you will have no hope in defeating the fate of the Republic. Trying to cheat death, is such a folly thing, and that’s what you will be doing if you end my life here and now,”
“I was ordered to try and kill you Revan, it was not my decision. This being, has greater power than any foe the Republic has ever faced. Allowing that to live is something we cannot do! Do you want to leave the republic no chance of survival?”

“And if I let you live, the threat can be destroyed. Is that it?”

“Mostly, yes,” said Jonas, “Because, by yourself you are a worthy advisary, don’t get me wrong, but if you face this evil you will die, along with everybody you have ever cared for or loved. Together is the only way we can destroy this threat!”

“You have killed the only person I have ever truly loved,” said Revan angrily, “And you expect me to trust you?”

“I did not expect so, no,” replied Jonas, shaking his head, “But you must understand, to let her live would not have been wise. She is powerful, in not only the Force, but in the inner energy of her self. She would have turned your will against you, and that would have been the end for sure.”

“Nothing what you say will take back for what you have done.” Whispered Revan

“Fine,” said Jonas, “But if you wont trust me about it not being right in me killing her, then believe me in this: If I had not killed her, you would have.”

“I would never harm her,” said Revan, “I could never be able to comprehend at what I would have become if I had killed Bastilla.”

“Ah, you see, you have Revan,” sneered Jonas, “You have killed her!”

“Reverse psychology?” laughed Revan, letting the tip of his saber gingerly touch the skin of Jonas’ throat.

“Tell me, if you did not send Nom to retrieve your companions, would Bastila still be alive?” said Jonas, as he frowned in displeasure at the burning tip searing his skin.

This comment hit Revan like an explosion being set in his chest; Jonas was right.

“You see that I speak the truth, Revan.’ Sneered Jonas

“No,” said Revan, miserably, “It’s not true, it can’t be. I wouldn’t … I couldn’t … “ He walked back and fell to the ground next to the limp form that was Bastila. Jonas got up and brushed the dirt from his robes; he retrieved his lightsaber and hitched it to his belt.

“Use this anger Revan, for it is the only way to destroy this threat. If you do not then there is no hope for survival, you know this.”

“No,” said Revan, “I will not fall, not now, nor ever again. I swore an oath, an oath that I still hold to.”

“How touching,” said Jonas, “Now, are you in or out? For if you are, only after killing this threat we can finish this little talk with our lightsabers if you wish. But it must wait until then.”

“I will not kill you … yet,” replied Revan, “But when the time comes, I will not hesitate in directing the final blow to end your life, Jonas. You will pay for Bastila’s death, I swear my own life on it.”

“Then let it be done!” declared Jonas, “We will fight side by side once again, but who shall survive by the end of the battle to come, only time will tell.”

* * *

“Nom, behind you!” yelled Carth, as he fought off two Sith soldiers.

The trap had been set, and they had fell for it. Nom had already concluded that the Sith allowed them to escape, only to catch and kill them later. Whilst Nom and Carth had been talking, a patrol of Sith, ambushed them. Nom quickly counted them to be at least around sixty when he first saw them and after an hour of fighting, there was at least half of that now. Amazingly none of the companions had fallen; however, Atton was nursing a blood nose and possibly a broken wrist, but he was able to fight well enough. Mira had taken a fairly hard knock to the head, but had recovered with only a slight dizziness, Visas, Jolee, Carth, Mission, and Nom fought without fault. With the help of Zaalbar, Mission was able to hide behind him whilst shooting off flurries of laser bolts.
If he thought training with Bastila was difficult, he really had no idea. Proper battling was more exhausting than what he ever though possible. Even though he used the Force to keep him energized, it had taken a lot out of him.

All of a sudden, there was an extreme ear splitting roar and the trees to his left shook and trembled with force before being pulled out from the roots and thrown out of the way. Ten extremely large, hungry and annoyed looking Terentaks were glaring mildly at them all; it seemed that the battle had woken them up, and they weren’t happy about that at all. Like a tidal wave of horns and teeth, they ripped through the line of soldiers, separating limbs from bodies and throwing them over their heads and down the sheer cliff. Screams echoed all around them as the companions watched at they’re newly found luck, but they were taking out of the hopefulness when none of the sith remained and the Terentaks turned to them.

“Ah, Carth?” said Nom, “What do we do know?”

“What we usually do,” said Carth irritably, “Fight until the last Terentak falls. And hope we don’t die in the process.”

“Well, thanks for the comfort.” Mocked Nom.

The Terentaks charged forward and Nom looked about him, trying to find ways to take the beasts off guard. He noticed an upturned tree, he used the Force and directed it at the Terentaks as hard and accurate as possible. Knocking four of them over, he leapt up in the air, ignited his lightsaber and ran across their stomachs, slashing through and across as he went.

Blaster bolts were fired in all directions, some hitting the Terentaks, others nearly hitting Nom, causing him to leap to the side on top of the Hawk.

“Watch it!” he yelled

“Sorry!” came back several replies (including a roar from Zaalbar)

Different coloured lightsabers were ignited; Nom flew off the ship and imprinted a picture of his foot onto the side of one of the beast’s head. Making him fall to the side knocking over three others. Visas, Jolee, Atton and Nom all jumped up on top of one and dug the sabers into each of the beast’s chests. A scream was heard and Nom saw Mission cowering as two Terentaks were taking swipes at her, without thinking he leapt off the dead Terentak and ran over. Sliding across the blood covered grass, he sliced both the inner legs of the two monsters, making them fall to the ground, Atton hurried over and he and Nom both lunged their sabers into the side of the beasts thick heads.

The last Terentak was standing over next to the cliff; Nom looked over, saw the beast and lazily flicked his hand and sent the Terentak over the edge, roaring until it hit the floor hundreds of meters below.
Suddenly, even though they had won that battle, Nom fell to his knees, panting and grasped at his heart. It was not from exhaustion, but from an almighty sorry of something terrible just happened. They all ran over and stood around him.

“What’s wrong, Nom?” asked Carth

“Bastila,” he gasped, “She’s … gone!”

“So it is done,” whispered Visas, behind them all.

“What do you mean, ‘gone’?” asked Carth fearfully, but he knew what he meant even before he finished the question.

“Dead,” whispered Nom, “Jonas, he killed her, just now. I felt it like he actually pierced my own heart with his blade.”

“No, I don’t believe it.” Said Carth

“I have to get there,” said Nom, “I know Revan said to stay here Carth,” he said as Carth went to interrupt him, “But that has changed now, besides, do you always do what your told?”
When Carth stayed silent, Nom said, “Thought so. Now, whoever wants to come, im not stopping you, but we will not rest until we get to that temple!”

With that, he took off and flew over the cliff, and when hitting the forest floor, next to the dead Terentak, he took off into the night.

* * *

As the great front doors opened, they revealed the barrier of thick trees and a great purplish sky above, with specks of red and yellow flashing across it. Silent and still was the air as it and the sky recognised the feeling of death and produced the colours to remember who ever had passed.
Jonas and Revan (who carried Bastila) walked down the front steps and onto the damp dewy grass below.

Revan was alerted by a presence suddenly bursting out of the trees but he was relieved to see it was Nom.

“You bas-!” yelled Nom as he lunged himself at Jonas, forgetting about everything else.

“Nom, stop,” whispered Revan, “There will be a time for that, but it is not now.’

“What? How can you say that! Look what he did!” yelled Nom.

“He will pay for what he has done, but not by you.” Said Revan.

“He may be willing enough to give you a second chance, but I wont be,” threatened Nom, not taking his eyes away from The Exile. Jonas just smirked.

“It’s Nom, isn’t it?” he said, “Why do you care for such things, you have such a power, you could do anything, yet you choose to stay and take the teachings from two masters, which one of whom is dead. Why?”

“To learn to use the Force so to be able to destroy beings such as yourself!” spat Nom
“Hmm,” replied Jonas, “With my teachings, I could show you powers that even the great Revan does not know, does that not interest you?”

“No, it does not.” Nom replied

“Your choice,” said Jonas. His attention however was directed to beyond the trees as the rest of the company emerged through the foliage.

Revan explained the whole situation to them and reluctantly they moved out of the way to let Jonas pass.

“I don’t like this,” said Carth as he walked next to Nom at the back of the group.

“Join the club,” replied Nom, bitterly, “But we have no choice but to trust that Revan knows what he is doing.”

They got back to the ship, and they entered into the main hold. Revan went and laid Bastila’s body down on the bed in the Port Dormitory. When he got back to the main hold he noticed every set of eyes were upon him.

Before they asked he said, “I’m heading to Coruscant to bury Bastila in the tomb of the Jedi Temple. Whomever wishes to come are able to. But I will not be doing anything else until this is done.” He said that last part mainly to Jonas.

Without saying another word, he walked into the cockpit, entered the specific co-ordinates and after a second when the stars lined before them and everything came to a stand still; they were launched into the slipstream tunnel and into Hyperspace. Heading to do one of the things, Revan thought that he would never have to do.

* * *

That night, no dreams were occurring where they were not interrupted by feelings and images of things that needed not disrupting.

Darkness surrounded Nom, light grey fog swirled around him. Stars started to shine brightly above him, and wind caressed his face. He felt grass between the toes of his bare feet, and the cool air soothed his thoughts and mind. Softly a voice spoke in his ear:

“Hello, Nom,” it said.
“Bastila?” he asked, and he was startled as a ghostly form of Bastila formed in front of him; she smiled at him.

“My time of being your master is over,” she said, “But do not stray from the path what you have started to walk. Listen and trust in Revan’s words, he will lead you from now on.”

“But Master,” said Nom, “Jonas joins us on the Ebon Hawk, Revan and Jonas are talking right now, just after what he had done to you!”

“I did not see this,” she said, more to herself, “Listen Nom, beware of Jonas, he is dangerous and will stop at nothing until everything is under his control.”

“I will make sure that never happens.” Assured Nom.

Bastila smiled, “I’m sure you will. Continue your training Nom, for very soon there will come a time, where you will have to make a choice. This choice could prove either deadly or hopeful for the republic. Trust in your feelings and you will make the right one,”

“But what if I don’t, Master? What if I fail?” he asked, miserably, “I cannot do this alone.”

“You will not be alone, you are surrounded by the most thoughtful and nice companions in the galaxy. Excluding Jonas of course.” She added, smiling.

“Yes, Master.” Replied Nom, “Thank you.”

“One more thing Nom,” said Bastila, “Tell Revan … Tell him that I do not hate him in any way for he has not done anything wrong. Tell him, I love him because he came for me, and that’s all that matters. And make sure to let him know, to take my body to Dantooine, I prefer the scenery of that planet much more than that of Coruscant.”

Nom smiled, “It will be done, Master”

“Oh, and Nom,” she said, “Call me Bastila, for I am not your Master anymore.” Nom laughed, “Sorry, Master … I mean, Bastila,”

“Now awake Nom, for your Destiny is about to begin.”
“Wait Master! Will I ever talk to you again?” Nom asked, but Bastila’s form was gone. But just before he woke up, he heard her soft voice in his ear say, “You may just yet Nom, you may just yet.”


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Old 02-15-2007, 05:21 AM   #115
Diego Varen
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I really liked this Chapter Mr_BFA. The talk between Revan and Jonas was done really good and I've always like the Exile, light or dark, male or female. Revan I can only really like as a male, but I don't mind some female versions. Anyway another good Chapter and looking foward to more, but I sense that this Fic is coming to an end, but I could be wrong.
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Old 02-15-2007, 07:21 AM   #116
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Thanks, Topsite. I always like to choose the Exile's side of things, even if he/she is DS. I'm the same, i prefer the Exile than to Revan.

I don't like to think that this Fic is coming to an end, because ive enjoyed writing it very much. But i think, (if i don't set it out in parts that is) that this story, has a little bit more to go yet.

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Old 02-24-2007, 07:04 AM   #117
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CHAPTER 23

“She came to you in a dream?” asked Revan, curiously. Nom had just told him about the dream he had had.

“Yes,” he replied, “And she told me some things, that you need to know,” So Nom explained to Revan all about her feelings toward him and her death, the place where she wants to be rested, and about the choice she said that he will have to make, “I just don’t get it though, what choice am I to make? What will become of it? Its just all too confusing.”

“Patience is a Jedi’s most valuable aspect, Nom,” said Revan, “If you have patience, then the situation will reveal itself to you, when you are ready to hear and see it.”

“I know master,” replied Nom, “But it is just so frustrating! I’m not meant for great things. There’s no great power or wisdom inside of me, its just emptiness.”

“You doubt my judgement?” asked Revan

“No,” said Nom, quickly, “Of course not.”

“Then take heed in what I say Nom,” said Revan, “There is a great power inside of you. You just have to realise that and take the responsibility what the Force has granted you. Bastila sensed it and I sense it also.”

“I will do what must be done.” Said Nom, lowering his head.

“Come,” said Revan, placing a hand on his shoulder, “Now is not the time to discuss such things. Besides, I have to go tell Carth that were changing course.” He smiled, turned around and made his way into the cockpit.

“So, wait just a second!” Revan heard Atton say as he neared the entrance to the cockpit, “You’re telling me, that you cut the engines when in a space battle?”

“Trust me,” replied Carth, as Revan got leant against the entrance, “When you’re in a space battle and you have Revan at the turrets, you want to give him a clear shot. The Sith make just one pass, and there you have. Space dust.”

“Your just a big old softy,” said Atton, “That’s what you are. You just can’t handle flying hard anymore.”

Before Carth could reply, Revan asked, “Am I interrupting anything?”

“No,” they both said at the same time. They shot dangerous glares at each other.

“I swear, that you two are like a couple of immature younglings.” Mocked Revan.

“With this one here,” said Carth irritably, shooting Atton another frown, “It’s easy to forget you have other important things to do with all of the idiocy what’s flying around.”

“Least I don’t smell like a rancor’s lair.” Muttered Atton

“That’s enough!” said Revan, as Carth was about to retort, “Nom just told me very interesting,” and he told them about the dream, “So, we’re heading to Dantooine. Enter the new co-ordinates and let’s go!”

“Yes, captain!” they both said, then looked at each other again, “Hey!”

Revan, just walked away, shaking his head, “It’s gonna be a long trip.”

Walking into the med bay, he sat down next to the box that was Bastila. Before they had left Azuria, Nom and Carth walked into the forest to a place where the Iliath trees grew. The bright brown-green bark what grew upon these trees was remarkably strong, it could even withstand a laser blast. Through slow and hard labour, they were able to carve a traditional coffin for Bastila. They placed her in the med bay; they thought it unfit to place her in the cargo hold like a piece of equipment.

He lifted off the lid and stared down at her peaceful face. Not moving, no more smiles, no more laughter. It felt like he had lost not only her, but also a piece of his very soul.
He placed his hand on her cold cheek, and felt a soft brush against his mind. Concentrating, he tried to locate the touch what he just felt, but it was gone. Letting out a deep, unsteadied breath, he placed the lid back on top and slowly, each step feeling more burdened than the last, he walked out of the room.

“Are you OK, Master?” asked Nom. He was sitting down at a small table that was located next to the storage room. Revan took a seat next to him.

“Have you ever felt loss, Nom?” asked Revan, “Have you had anyone that you have loved most dearly and had them taken away from you on an instant?”

“You cannot miss what you have never had.” Replied Nom

“I guess your right,” Revan sighed, then let out a small laugh, “Your the apprentice and im the teacher, and yet I feel that im learning more from you than you from I.”

“Hey guess what,” said Nom suddenly, “I completely forgot with everything that has happened, what time of the year it was. It’s my birthday.”

“Really?” said Revan, “Well, happy birthday. How old are you?”

“Well, back on Azuria, the leaves would have fallen for the thirteenth time.” Replied Nom, and when Revan just looked at him dumbfounded, he added, “Eighteen,”

“Ah, a coming of age party! I like the sound of It.” Said Revan

“I don’t want a party,” said Nom, “Not now anyway. It can wait.”

“Yes, and it should.” Said Revan, looking towards the med bay door.

“Don’t tell anyone that it is my birthday, please.” Said Nom

“Why not?” asked Revan

“Because,” said Nom, “then everybody will be feeling different than what they should. Bastila is gone and we shouldn’t ignore that.”

“No we shouldn’t, and nor would we,” Said Revan, “Birthdays are a time for celebration Nom. The beginning of a life is not something to be thrown aside.”

“Nor should the ending of one.” Said Nom, evasively.

“Bastila would not want us to dwell on what has happened, we can keep and honour her memory and that’s the best we can do.”
Suddenly Revan realized that he was not only just talking to Nom, but to himself as well.

* * *

“We’re coming up on Dantooine,” yelled out Atton

“Finally,” said Revan, and through a whisper he said to Nom, “And finally it sounds like those two have stopped argue-,”

“I thought we decided that I would take off, and announced when we arrived somewhere, and you would fly the ship whilst we were flying around the planet we are at and whilst in orbit! I am the Admiral of the Republic Fleet, it is not the other way around!”

“Carth, Atton, cut it out!” said Revan, “talk about bloody annoying!” Nom just smiled as they descended the boarding ramp and onto the grass plain of Dantooine.

Early morning was just awakening as they stepped onto the grass. The faint smell of dew and pine reached Nom’s nostrils and he took a long refreshing breath. The sun was shining her face through spots of purplish sky through a group of heavy greyish clouds high above. Nom could hear distant birds and animals through the trees and large Kath hounds bounding across the plains.

“The souls of Jedi long lost to the Universe walk upon this earth still.” Said Visas, as her and the rest of the companions descended the ramp.

“And they shall be accompanied by one more on this day.” replied Revan.

“I have acknowledged to the other Jedi Masters at Coruscant about what has happened,” said Nom, “But they cannot leave the Academy because of the Students.”

“I understand,” said Revan. This was one day, which he had hoped never to live.

The day was spent traversing through the Jedi Enclave and its surroundings.

“I regret that I was not here on the day the fire from Malak rained down upon my home.”

“If you were here, you would have died too Revan,” said Nom, “And that would have made matters worse.”

They got a call from Carth on the comlink for Revan to get to the Council chambers as fast as he could, so he and Nom took off back into the enclave to where Carth and the rest of the crew were.

“What in the -,” Revan said as he gazed down on three sets of skeletal remains scattered throughout the grass.

“So this is what happened,” said Visas, as she turned her head in Jonas’ direction.

Revan looked at her, then at Jonas. “What have you done?” he whispered

“They had to pay for what they had done to me, Revan.” He replied. No emotion could be seen on his face as he continued to look at Revan.

“So you killed them? What did they do to deserve such a fate?”

“They were the ones responsible for cutting the Force from me. And for that, they had to be punished.”

“You are sick!” said Revan

“Enough of the flattery Revan,” sneered Jonas.

* * *

Night came, and it was to reveal a sight of deep sorrow. A bonfire was slowly burning next to the Jedi Enclave and Bastila’s grave, along with the graves made for the three discovered Jedi Masters.

The headstones were carved with the names of the deceased; silence surrounded and succumbed every living thing.

“And so passes the last of the Jedi Masters of Dantooine.” Said Revan. He turned to leave but stopped when he heard Nom saying, mostly to himself, “I swear to you Master, that by my life, I will continue the lost teachings of this enclave. I will fill these halls with life once more, and protect everything and everyone in this galaxy that needs my protection.”

Revan placed a hand on Nom’s shoulder and realized he was shaking slightly, he whispered, “Come, Nom. You made an oath, now it is my turn. I swear to you that I will help in every way I can to help you fulfil your destiny, I promise.”

Nom looked up at Revan, “Thank you Master but… I think that this is a path that I must take on my own. I will journey with you for the rest of our quest, but then I am afraid I must strike out on my own. I think that this was what Bastila meant. I will see the rebirth of the Jedi, and make sure that as long as I live, I will see to it that the Republic will never fall to the demise of the Sith again.”

“You have grown far more than I could have hoped these past few months Nom,” said Revan, as they slowly turned their back to the fire and walked back to the ship, “You truly are a Jedi.”

* * *

“Revan!” said Jonas, as he seen Revan enter the main hold of the Ebon Hawk, “We need to talk, now.’

“Fine.” Said Revan sharply. They walked into the Port Dorm and Jonas turned to Revan and said, “It is time. We cannot linger here anymore. I feel the end is near, and it will come swiftly if we are not to act.” Revan continued to look at Jonas. He knew it was time; he had sensed it earlier as well. The threat’s time to strike, had now come, “Do you have any idea as to where to look for the threat?” asked Revan

“Azuria,” replied Jonas, “It is an ancient planet and it holds the key to the location for where we must go. It is time Revan, when the light and the Darkness shall clash together once more. The destiny of the Republic is about to be uncloaked. it is time Revan. To face, the True Sith!”


Last edited by The_Catto; 02-24-2007 at 07:46 AM.
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Old 02-24-2007, 07:30 AM   #118
Bee Hoon
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I can't believe I missed so many updates!:O Thanks for the clarification. *gasp* You killed Bastila! Now that's something I didn't see coming.

Just a few suggestions:

Quote:
Atton was supporting a blood nose and possibly a broken wrist, but he was able to fight good enough.
It sounds a bit odd, and something like "Atton was nursing a bloody nose and possibly a broken wrist, but he was able to fight well enough."

And Nom just jumped off the cliff that successfully killed a terentatek that fell off, and he did so without any injury whatsoever? :S

Otherwise, keep it up! Can't wait for the True Sith



The sun goes down and the sky reddens, pain grows sharp.
light dwindles. Then is evening
when jasmine flowers open, the deluded say.
But evening is the great brightening dawn
when crested cocks crow all through the tall city
and evening is the whole day
for those without their lovers

-Kuruntokai 234, translated by A.K. Ramanujan

[Fic] Shreds of a Dying Belief
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Old 02-24-2007, 07:42 AM   #119
The_Catto
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Thanks Beehoon.
Yeah, i needed to do something to make the story abit more interesting and give the title a bit more meaning, i thought.

Thanks for the suggestion for the line with Atton's injuries, it really seemed to suit it alot more than what i originally put there. And as for Nom not getting any injury when he jumped off the cliff. Nom had the Force so he was able to more or less, glide himself down. Which didnt give any injury. Whereas, the Terentak could not stop itself from falling and there for, resulting in its painful, but quick, death, lol.

I hope that explains it

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Old 02-24-2007, 07:58 AM   #120
Bee Hoon
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Hehe, fair enough. These darned Force users are just so unpredictable, lol. Jonas sure is evil now. Oh btw, enjoyed the Carth-Atton argument. Lol.



The sun goes down and the sky reddens, pain grows sharp.
light dwindles. Then is evening
when jasmine flowers open, the deluded say.
But evening is the great brightening dawn
when crested cocks crow all through the tall city
and evening is the whole day
for those without their lovers

-Kuruntokai 234, translated by A.K. Ramanujan

[Fic] Shreds of a Dying Belief
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