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Old 12-13-2006, 02:06 AM   #1
Diego Varen
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Unsatisfied Hunger


(Click the above picture, which igyman also made to read the first part of the Sera Tana series, Echoes of Darkness).

Hello everyone and welcome to the second part of the Sera Tana series. I'll release the Prologue, but the Chapters won't be released, until Saturday, since by then, I should have some Chapters to release, since I've only written two. I'll release the banner(s) that igyman has made for me (Thank you once again).




I'd like to thank all my fans, including CSI: Nihilus, Jason Skywalker and many others. Well the Opening Scroll and Prologue are below in Post #2.
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Old 12-13-2006, 02:09 AM   #2
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Star Wars
Unsatisfied Hunger


One year has passed, since the death of the SITH LORD, EMPEROR DEVON and the planet, TRAMOND XXV. The JEDI EXILE, SERA TANA and her husband, ATTON RAND have been blessed with their own child, KAVAR RAND, who was named after one of Sera’s JEDI MASTERS, prior to the MANDALORIAN WARS.

REVAN still hasn’t been seen for five years, since he ventured into the UNKNOWN REGIONS and the REPUBLIC ADMIRAL, CARTH ONASI is concerned of his whereabouts. Since the REPUBLIC is still being rebuilt and work on the new JEDI ORDER hasn’t even begun, Carth knows only one person who can find his old companion, during the JEDI CIVIL WAR.

Eleven years before the current events, prior to the Mandalorian Wars, a young JEDI KNIGHT discusses to the wise Jedi Masters on the JEDI COUNCIL, about the MANDALORIAN attacks on certain planets. Little does the Jedi Knight know that all of his decisions will lead him to the DARK SIDE

Prologue

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering! I sense much fear in you.”
- Yoda

Zann Sturm, a Jedi who had recently become a Jedi Knight, stood before two of the Jedi Masters from the Jedi Council. He had requested a meeting with them, to discuss about the recent Mandalorian attacks on several planets in the Outer Rim. Zann had been very concerned at this, knowing that many innocent people were in danger and the Republic in which the Jedi Order aided were also losing to the Mandalorians. Master Vandar, the Grand Jedi Master, who was also the shortest and oldest of the Jedi Masters spoke first.

“Knight Sturm,” Vandar began, “You’ve requested a meeting.”

Zann bowed to Vandar before speaking. Despite Zann’s disagreements with the wisest members of the order, he had always respected Vandar with great interest. He had taught Zann the ways of the Force, since he had joined the Jedi Order, when he was very young. A Youngling, as Vandar and many of the other masters liked to call the members of the order who were thirteen years old or younger.

“I have master,” Zann began, “And I appreciate that you have let me speak to you about the Mandalorian attacks.”

“Well, we like to listen to what any member of our grand order has to say,” The elder Jedi Master, Vrook snapped.

Vandar held his hand up in the air.

“Patience, Master Vrook,” Vandar told Vrook, “I know that you and Knight Sturm haven’t gotten along in the past, but we must discuss what Zann wants to discuss.”

Well, what could Zann say? He knew that many innocent people were in danger and that the Jedi weren’t doing anything to help the Republic, who were trying to defend them from the Mandalorians.

“Masters,” Zann began, “As you might already know, I believe that we should send a small group of Jedi Knights to aid the Republic, who are failing with their task of defending the innocents. Isn’t it what we do? We’re keepers of the peace…”

“Not soldiers,” Vrook interrupted, “Vandar, myself and the other Jedi Masters have discussed this and we believe that the right time to aid the Republic is when we decide the right time to send help.”

“That is arrogant, wouldn’t you say, Master Vrook?” Zann asked, regretting the fact that he had sounded rude.

Zann was expecting a rude answer from Vrook, but there was silence. Vandar didn’t speak, nor did Vrook. Zann didn’t have anything else to say, until either of the masters spoke.

“We appreciate you for coming to speak to us,” Vandar told Zann, ending the silence, “Vrook, myself and the rest of the council must discuss this privately. We have nothing more to discuss. You may leave, when you are ready.”

Zann once again, bowed down to the two elderly masters.

“As you wish Master Vandar,” Zann told Vandar, “I appreciate your patience.”

Zann turned and left the room.

*****

Several hours later, after their duty of sitting on the council was over, Vandar and Vrook returned to the same room where Zann had discussed with them about the Mandalorian attacks. They were going to talk about Zann, but it wasn’t really about their recent discussion.

“Master Vandar,” Vrook began, “Today, I caught him in a heated argument with my Padawan! His master refuses to properly discipline him. I want to know what action you intend to do about this!

“Vrook, I respect your wisdom, but it is not your concern,” Vandar told Vrook.

“But he isn’t disciplined, he is uncontrolled!” Vrook shouted, “Whatever the other Padawans see him do, they are quick to do the same, however, other students dislike him intensely!”

“I strongly disagree,” Vrook continued, hoping his master would listen to him, “He is a mediocre Jedi, who has a lust for power! It will lead to the dark side! Furthermore it will…”

“This isn’t a matter we cannot discuss, until what you are saying is proved Master Vrook,” Vandar told him, “This matter shall not be discussed anymore.”

Vandar walked off, leaving Vrook annoyed.
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Old 12-13-2006, 02:11 AM   #3
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[Force Manuscript Drain]Now I'm really hungery...More manuscripts...[Grabbs Pottsie's uncompleted manuscript, with glowing yellowish eye]...Can't resist...I must feed!!![/Force manuscript Drain]

Just kidding.

However, this may like a RP. So I may consider it it'a sort of advertising...Nicely done, Pottsie and always looking forward to see more.




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Killed in a suicide attempt of ramming his own ship, Ravager, onto the surface of Telos IV. --Casualty Report: Order 66
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Old 12-13-2006, 02:13 AM   #4
Diego Varen
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Thanks for the comments CSI and I'm glad you like it.
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Old 12-13-2006, 06:08 AM   #5
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Nice work on the prologue, I hope you'll be able to finish this one without rushing as I look forward to seeing where your story goes.
As for the banners, heh, like I said, no problem.

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Old 12-13-2006, 07:46 AM   #6
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Good one. Also, it is obvious that:

spoiler:
Zann is Nihilus


Read at your own risk.
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Old 12-13-2006, 10:54 AM   #7
Diego Varen
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Am I that predictable Jason? It is possible that Zann is Nihilus, but I'm not revealing anything yet. Remember that I shall be posting some Chapters on Saturday. Anyway, thanks for the comments igyman and Jason Skywalker.

Also, since igyman and I couldn't decide which banner we liked more, although I think that the Korriban banner looks a bit better than the Malachor one. Even though I've now decided which I prefer, I thought that the public could still choose which they prefered, for when I do the FIN version. Feel free to vote.

Anyway, thanks for the comments all.
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Old 12-13-2006, 09:53 PM   #8
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Nice prologue, looking forward to more.
And I like the Malachor banner better.


Yes
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Old 12-14-2006, 05:46 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AkumaSF
Nice prologue, looking forward to more.
And I like the Malachor banner better.
Agreed. Korriban one looks a bit plain...
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Old 12-14-2006, 04:15 PM   #10
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good prologue pottsie looking forward for more

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Old 12-14-2006, 10:45 PM   #11
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A reason why the Malachor banner would suit it better - Nihilus learned of the Sith and got his powers on Malachor, Revan also turned to the Dark Side on Malachor.


Yes
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Old 12-15-2006, 01:21 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AkumaSF
A reason why the Malachor banner would suit it better - Nihilus learned of the Sith and got his powers on Malachor, Revan also turned to the Dark Side on Malachor.
I suppose it's personal opinion I suppose, but a Malachor banner has already been used with the Echoes of Darkness and it would be a bit too similar to the previous one, but I decided to let you guys/gals vote. Also Grivis, can you say which banner you prefer. Remember, Chapters should be posted tomorrow, at different times, since I want comments for just one Chapter at a time, so until I get one comment on a Chapter, I'll post the next Chapter. I'm writing Chapter 5 by the way, at the moment. Oh and thanks for other comments all.

Last edited by Pottsie; 12-15-2006 at 02:24 AM.
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Old 12-15-2006, 05:24 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pottsie
I suppose it's personal opinion I suppose, but a Malachor banner has already been used with the Echoes of Darkness and it would be a bit too similar to the previous one, but I decided to let you guys/gals vote. Also Grivis, can you say which banner you prefer. Remember, Chapters should be posted tomorrow, at different times, since I want comments for just one Chapter at a time, so until I get one comment on a Chapter, I'll post the next Chapter. I'm writing Chapter 5 by the way, at the moment. Oh and thanks for other comments all.
i would say now, but i can't because i can't see igyman's pics anymore on my computer. Just his for some wierd reasn. I saw them on my schools computers. Is the second one the one with Nihilous and Malachor 5 in nthe background, if so that one.

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Old 12-19-2006, 01:27 AM   #14
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I'm sorry I didn't post my Chapters on saturday, but LF wasn't working for three days, but I'll post one Chapter each day, since I break up for the Christmas Holidays today and I'll be on LF more. Happy holidays.

----------------------------------------
PART I
Telos
----------------------------------------

Chapter I - Dream or Vision?

"In the end, you belong to neither the light nor the darkness. You will forever stand alone."
- Darth Malak

Inside a dark building, a young man, around his thirties, stood pacing around the large library. The library was the main part of the building. Many holodiscs and consoles were in the room. Normally, all the holodiscs would be stacked tidily, but the young man was obsessively looking through all the holodiscs, as if he was looking for something. Something that he had lost.

“Where is it?” He asked himself, “It should be here, I sensed it!”

In anger, he immediately threw the holodisc he was holding into the corner. He sighed and let his hands run through his long brown hair, as he thought for a moment. He seemed troubled, as he flicked through the other holodiscs, each of them receiving the same result, as they were thrown into the corner. As the man was looking through one particular holodisc, that seemed to be the one he was looking for, he heard a noise. A noise that seemed familiar, yet he couldn’t think of what it was.

“Who’s there?” He asked, grabbing onto his Lightsabers, but he wasn’t igniting them.

There was no reply. The only reply the man received was the silence and darkness of the night. The man heard the noise again, only this time it was louder.

“I demand to know who’s there!” The man shouted, igniting his purple and red coloured Lightsabers.

The man used his Lightsabers to see through the darkness, but he couldn’t see anything. The Force had also blinded his senses. The man felt more troubled than he was earlier. The fact that he thought that he wasn’t alone, terrified him even more. The man heard the noise again, this time it was directly behind him. The man turned around to see something, dressed in black, but the man couldn’t see the thing’s facial features, except for two eyes.

“Speak to me,” The man demanded, clutching onto his Lightsabers.

The thing said nothing as the thing forced the man opposite into a Force stun.


*****

Sera Tana, the Jedi Exile, immediately awoke, her forehead sweating, as her eyes became accustomed to the dark. Her husband, Atton Rand was still asleep and Sera couldn’t hear their child, Kavar wailing for his parents. Sera got out of bed and walked outside to the garden, outside their home on the restored planet of Telos. Sera felt at peace, every time she was outside in the garden. She had always liked the great outdoors. Sera sat on the cobbled path and began to meditate, after flattening her short blonde hair.

*****

Atton woke up and noticed that his wife had gone. Atton always knew where his wife was, every time she wasn’t with him. She was in the gardens, trying to escape the nightmares that plagued her mind every night. Atton got up and got changed into his clothes, before checking up on Kavar. Kavar had been named after one of Sera’s Jedi Masters, before the Mandalorian Wars had begun. Kavar slept peacefully as Atton brought the bed sheets back over him, to keep him warm. Atton gave him a kiss on his little head, before leaving Kavar’s bedroom. He had to check up on his wife.

Outside in the garden, Atton saw his wife in deep meditation. Her legs were crossed and she was silent. Atton couldn’t even hear her breath. He walked towards her and placed his hand on her shoulder.

“Darling,” He began, “You seem troubled, I can sense it.”

Sera stood up and turned to see her husband.

“Atton, I’ll be back to bed soon,” Sera told him.

Atton chuckled slightly, as he took off his torn brown jacket and put it on Sera.

“It’s cold tonight, isn’t it?” He asked.

Sera nodded, immediately turning around, without replying.

“Don’t give me that,” He continued, “I can read you like a Pazaak Deck. You’ve been having nightmares all week and I can tell. You’re all shaky and it isn’t because of drinking too many Juma Juices.”

Sera sighed and turned around, to see her husband again.

“You still compare me to Juma Juices,” Sera told Atton, “Can’t you see that?”

“Of course I can,” He told her, “I’m your husband. Don’t shut me out from your problems Sera, let me help you,” He grabbed her hands and rubbed them together, trying to warm them up, “Let me help you, like you did on Nar Shaddaa for me.”

Sera walked towards the house, taking Atton’s jacket off and throwing it back to him.

“Kavar wants his mother,” She told him, before returning to the house and leaving Atton alone in the garden.

Last edited by Pottsie; 12-19-2006 at 05:28 PM.
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Old 12-19-2006, 07:17 AM   #15
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Good beginning Pottsie, i want to see more, and i just hope you don't quit on the Sera Tana Saga! Or else...

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Old 12-19-2006, 09:52 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jason Skywalker
Good beginning Pottsie, i want to see more, and i just hope you don't quit on the Sera Tana Saga! Or else...

... There will be trouble. Anyway, I've broken up from school now for two weeks from today, 19th Dec 2006 - 3rd Jan 2007. I might be able to write some of this Fic more. Thanks for the comments Jason and I hope I don't quit either. I've got two more parts planned after this. Anyway, I hope this Fic to be about twenty Chapters long.

Here is Chapter 2.

Chapter II - Answers

"I can feel its power!"
- Darth Malak

The next morning arrived quicker than Sera had expected. Since looking after Kavar last night, after her discussion with Atton, Kavar had been asleep and neither Atton nor Sera had spoken to each other. Sera woke up early and began breakfast. By the time Sera had finished breakfast, Atton had woken up and sat with Sera at the table.

“Last night,” He began, “I’m aware that you couldn’t tell me your problem, but I need you to tell me. I can help you.”

“Well, I dreamed about someone,” Sera told Atton, “I think it was Revan.”

“Revan?” Atton asked, “That’s a new one.”

Sera swallowed hard, before continuing.

“I know,” She told him, “He was in a library of some sort, searching for something important. Something important to him. And there was a voice. A voice I haven’t heard for a while and while I think I recognise it, I don’t remember it.”

Atton shook his head, confused.

“You sure confuse me Sera,” Atton told her.

“It doesn’t matter anyway Atton,” Sera told him, getting ready to leave the room, “It was only a dream.”

*****

Inside the hangar, opposite Sera’s home, Sera’s Wookiee friend, Roarboar, was repairing her ship, the Ebon Hawk. Like most of his species, he had brown fur, with a tint of grey, showing his old age. He was very tall and he made Sera feel small in his presence. When Sera entered the hangar, Roarboar immediately roared in happiness and left the Ebon Hawk to greet Sera. He immediately lifted her up from the floor and embraced her. Sera choked at the strength Roarboar was using. Soon Roarboar let her go.

“Roarboar, I think you broke half of my ribs there,” Sera told him.

Roarboar laughed at her and walked back over to the Ebon Hawk. Sera followed him. Roarboar was a Wookiee, Sera had saved, during the Jedi Civil War, in her adventures as an exile. He had been on Sleheyron, under captivity by the Trandoshan Slavers and Sera happened to be on the planet at the time and rescued him. Like most Wookiees who were rescued, he swore a life debt to her, but Sera knew that he had a family to return to and Sera told him that he would serve his life debt to her, by returning to Kashyyyk and staying with his family. It wasn’t until after the events on Tramond XXV, that Sera was reunited with Roarboar on Telos. Roarboar remembered his life debt and continued to serve her as a family friend. He had looked after Kavar, the two Droids that Sera owned, the Assassin Droid, HK-47 and the Utility Droid, T3-M4 and fixed the Ebon Hawk, when it needed fixing.

“Thank you for doing this Roarboar,” Sera told him, scratching under his furry chin, the one place that Roarboar liked being tickled.

“Query: Master, what are you doing with the furry meatbag?” HK asked, as he walked down the boarding ramp of the Ebon Hawk.

“Nothing HK,” Sera told him, “Where is T3?”

“Answer: He is on this vessel, tinkering around with the security systems,” HK told Sera.

“Well at least I know,” Sera told HK, before returning her attention to Roarboar, “Roarboar, I won’t be needing the Ebon Hawk for a while, so you and the Droids can come home for a while.”

*****

Later on in the evening, Sera, Atton and Roarboar were sitting around the table. Kavar was asleep, as usual and the Droids had been turned off for a while.

“Sera, we didn’t finish our discussion this morning,” Atton told Sera.

“I can’t talk about it Atton,” Sera told him.

Roarboar roared sadly, hoping he could get Sera to talk to her husband.

“The dream was strange,” Sera told both Atton and Roarboar, “I believe Revan was there and he wasn’t on his own. He had company with him and he didn’t want any company. But the strange thing is. Is that I heard that strange voice before.”

There was silence. Sera took this opportunity to think. Perhaps it was a sign that Sera should go and search for Revan, like she did, before she had Kavar. The Force worked in mysterious ways indeed.

“I must see Admiral Onasi,” Sera told Atton and Roarboar, standing up.

“He’s in a meeting with the new Senate,” Atton told Sera.

“I know Atton,” Sera told him, “Carth has told me that I can see him at anytime and besides, politics and politicians aren’t my thing.”

As Sera ran out of the house, Roarboar laughed at Atton.

“Laugh it up fussball,” Atton told him, getting up to check on Kavar.

Last edited by Pottsie; 12-19-2006 at 10:04 AM.
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Old 12-19-2006, 10:55 AM   #17
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Good Chapters Pottise, i also hope you don't quit, so keep it up.

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Old 12-19-2006, 11:11 AM   #18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pottsie
“Laugh it up fussball,” Atton told him, getting up to check on Kavar.
Lol, comical! Keep up the good work!
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Old 12-19-2006, 12:03 PM   #19
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Good chapters as always Pottsie and I'm looking forward to more.




| Muunilinst 10 | Real Life | Exiled Jedi Weapon Master | Ex-Sith Marauder | Gunslinger |
Killed in a suicide attempt of ramming his own ship, Ravager, onto the surface of Telos IV. --Casualty Report: Order 66
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Old 12-19-2006, 12:39 PM   #20
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Quote:
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Lol, comical! Keep up the good work!
Thanks for the comments all and that comment was adapted from one of Han Solo's lines to Chewie in ESB.
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Old 12-19-2006, 02:33 PM   #21
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Nice work Pottsie, the story sounds very interesting.
[GP mode]
Quote:
“Who’s there?” He asked, grabbing onto his Lightsabers, but he wasn’t igniting them.
Fixed. [/GP mode]
If I'm not mistaken
spoiler:
the man from chapter I is Revan.

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Old 12-19-2006, 02:53 PM   #22
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Exile said it was.

Also Pottsie, on a side-note, i look forward to see your new shortie tomorrow.
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Old 12-19-2006, 05:27 PM   #23
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Quote:
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Exile said it was.

Also Pottsie, on a side-note, i look forward to see your new shortie tomorrow.
Thanks Jason. It's very short, about two pages in Word. It isn't my best work. Anyway, thanks for the corrections igy and I won't be revealing any spoilers to this Fic or it's future Sequels.
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Old 12-22-2006, 08:26 AM   #24
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Chapter III - The Meeting

“The dark side clouds everything. Impossible to see, the future is.”
- Yoda

Sera ran towards the large, dome building, where all the meetings were held. The Senate Chambers was the most beautiful building on Telos. The sun always shone on it’s gleaming, white exterior and there wasn’t any dirt marks or anything on the building. As Sera approached the Senate Chambers, the doors automatically opened as she walked towards the first meeting room.

*****

Inside the Senate Chambers, the Republic Admiral, Carth Onasi had called a meeting with the majority of the Jedi Masters. He wanted to talk to them about restoring the Jedi Order on Coruscant. Carth stood tall and proud behind his podium as the meeting began.

“Jedi Masters,” He began, “I’ve called you here this evening for one reason. To talk about restoring the Jedi Order.”

“Where is Senator Katare?” Brianna asked.

“She is on business on her homeworld of Alderaan,” Carth told the young Handmaiden, who currently resided in the secret Telos Academy in the polar part of Telos, “She has asked me to continue the meeting for her.”

Sera entered the room and sat behind one of her friends, the Miraluka, Visas Marr. As Sera got comfortable, Visas began to speak.

“Admiral Onasi,” She began, “The other Jedi Masters and I have decided that the new Jedi Order shall be restored on Telos. Both of the orders on Dantooine and Coruscant have both suffered and the people on the planet, don’t want us to return.”

“Well people will have to cope, since not everything will go the way they want it to,” Carth told everyone, sternly, “Coruscant was where the Jedi always gathered, before and after the Mandalorian Wars and the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, shall be where the Jedi will be for many years to come.”

“So basically, you want us all to leave Telos for Coruscant?” The Zabrak, Bao-Dur asked.

“Yes, Bao-Dur,” Carth told him, “I’ve discussed these matters with Mical and he agrees that the Jedi Temple on Coruscant should be rebuilt and used once more.”

Sera stood up and walked to where Carth was standing. After all, she was the leader of the Jedi Order at this present moment in time and since Revan wasn’t here, she had to make the decisions.

“I agree with Admiral Onasi,” She told the entire Senate, “Coruscant is the perfect place to re gather the Jedi Order. When I was in the Telos Academy, the place was tainted with the dark side and I don’t wish any more Jedi to suffer like Atris did.”

Nobody replied, but they did agree with all of Sera’s points. In the end, it was all decided that the Jedi Order would be on Coruscant and the Jedi Orders on Telos and Dantooine would be forgotten. Everyone started to leave the Senate Chambers, but Carth had requested another meeting, this time with Sera and another Jedi Knight, Bastila Shan.

“Jedi Exile, Sera Tana, I’d like you to meet Jedi Knight, Bastila Shan,” Carth told Sera, “I served under Bastila, during the Jedi Civil War. You know, the one I told you about.”

Sera shook Bastila’s hand, before returning her attention to Carth.

“Of course I remember Admiral,” Sera told him, “She fell in love with Revan and…”

“I already know all of that exile,” Bastila told Sera sternly, “This is what the Admiral, you and I need to discuss. I had a dream, or a vision of Revan.”

“What a coincidence,” Sera told Bastila, “So did I. He was in a library, of some sorts.”

“We can’t discuss about this now,” Carth told the two ladies, “Revan is alive and from your discussion on the vision, I believe he is somewhere in the galaxy. The only question is where. Look come back tomorrow and we can discuss this matter in more detail.”

“As you wish Admiral,” Sera told Carth, bowing to him, before leaving the Senate Chambers.

Questions ran through Sera’s mind as she left. She had heard many rumours of Revan returning to the light side, during the end of the Jedi Civil War. Was he the same person as he was in the Mandalorian Wars? Sera doubted it, since people changed over time. Sera knew this. She was once the independent sole traveller, during her exile, but after meeting Atton on Peragus, it all changed. Whether Revan was alive or not, changed or not, Sera was determined to find Revan.

Last edited by Pottsie; 12-22-2006 at 03:16 PM.
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Old 12-22-2006, 10:38 AM   #25
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Good chapter Pottsie.... as always looking forward to more
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Old 12-22-2006, 10:43 AM   #26
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Not a bad chapter, calm, very calm for an Unsatisfied Hunger.
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Old 12-22-2006, 10:52 AM   #27
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Good chap pottise...and Jason the Unsatisfied Hunger has already started for me...its for more chapters!!!


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Old 12-22-2006, 12:10 PM   #28
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Lolz, good point. And it's Jason. -.-

Anyways, i look forward to satisfie my hunger to read your chapters Pottsie!
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Old 12-22-2006, 01:00 PM   #29
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Yes, very nice Pottsie, the plot is developing nicely, but you could work on some parts of your style. For example, when you said in the narrative part that Carth called the Jedi to discuss the restoration of the Order on Coruscant, you could have made the dialogue part where this is also stated a little more subtle, maybe one of the Jedi finishing his sentence for him.
Don't take this the wrong way, I don't mean anything insulting by this, I'm just trying to help you improve as you and some other people helped me when I started writing fics.

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Old 12-22-2006, 01:14 PM   #30
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Very nice chapter, and I like it. Keep up, and looking forward to more, Pottsie. You're doing a great job.




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Killed in a suicide attempt of ramming his own ship, Ravager, onto the surface of Telos IV. --Casualty Report: Order 66
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Old 12-22-2006, 02:52 PM   #31
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Originally Posted by CSI: Nihilus
Very nice chapter, and I like it. Keep up, and looking forward to more, Pottsie. You're doing a great job.
Thanks CSI. And igy, thanks for your helpful comments. I appreciate any help.
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Old 12-22-2006, 03:21 PM   #32
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Chapter IV - Leaving Telos

“He is a wound in the Force, more presence than flesh, and in his wake life dies… sacrificing itself to his hunger.”
- Visas Marr

The noise was getting louder. The man could hear it coming closer to him. The noise sounded more and more threatening as it got louder. The man kept his Lightsabers on as he waited for the thing to show itself. Soon, in front of the man, the thing appeared. The thing wore a long white mask and he was dressed in a long black robe. He spoke in a language the man didn’t understand.

“I’m no longer Revan, I keep telling you that!” The man shouted at the thing, “I’m Diego Varen, Darth Revan is dead.”

The thing became angry as he started shouting in his strange language. Diego, however, could understand it very easily.

“Why are you here?” Diego asked, his Lightsabers still on, “You continue to appear to me, every night, threatening me. Why do you do this, Darth Nihilus?”

Nihilus spoke again.

“I’ve heard about you,” Diego told Nihilus, “Even rumours are spread to the most hidden of places. Here. You’re not alive, Sith. You died.”

Nihilus started becoming angry, his sounds becoming louder and faster.

“Somehow, you’re hunger for power has kept you alive,” Diego told Nihilus, trying not to be intimidated by him, “You’re the Lord of Hunger and all you live for is for hunger. You killed many of my masters on Katarr. For that you’ll pay.”

Nihilus said nothing as he walked off, as if he wasn’t ready to battle. Diego turned his Lightsabers off and remained in the darkness.


*****

Another nightmare. Sera was getting sick of these reoccurring nightmares and wanted to end them. Perhaps finding Revan, or Diego Varen, whatever he called himself nowadays, would end these painful nightmares. This time, however, Sera didn’t feel afraid. It was a sign. A sign from the Force. As she got out of bed, Sera could hear Kavar crying, so she decided to tend to him first, before doing anything else.

*****

Inside the Senate Chambers, Carth and Bastila were inside Carth’s office, discussing about what would happen over the next few days. Bastila was worried for Revan, as she had not seen him for five years, since he left. She was also worried about Sera, since she had changed, since her meeting with Carth, before she had left for Malachor V.

“Sera,” Bastila told her, bowing towards her, “It is a pleasure to see you again.”

“Same here,” Sera told her, before turning her attention to Carth, “The Ebon Hawk is all ready to go. The Droids will also accompany us.”

“I suppose they could come,” Bastila told Sera, “We may need their help in this journey.”

“So when do we leave?” Sera asked.

“Right now,” Carth told Sera, “But it is your choice. You can say goodbye to your closest friends and family, but I fear for Revan’s life. He’s been in the Unknown Regions for too long.”

Sera and Bastila walked towards Carth, before leaving the Senate Chambers. As they left, Sera knew that she had to say goodbye to her family and friends. In particular, Atton.

*****

When Sera walked into the house, Atton was alone. Sera guessed that Roarboar was over at the hangar and Kavar was asleep in his bedroom. Atton immediately got up off his chair and hugged Sera.

“It’s good your home,” Atton told Sera as the two of them broke away from their hug, “You’re trembling. I can feel it, what’s wrong?”

Sera felt a tear pouring from her eye, as she looked up at Atton’s face, feeling embarrassed. She shouldn’t be embarrassed, but she wouldn’t see Atton for a while. Maybe, she wouldn’t see him for a long time. Sera knew she didn’t want to leave. The last time she had left Atton behind, she had missed him so much and she didn’t want to experience that again. Perhaps Atton would protest against her and beg her to let him come along with him.

“Revan,” Sera whispered, “Bastila and I are going to find him. It will be a long journey and I won’t see you for a while.”

“Hey, why can’t I, you’re loving husband join you in your new quest?” Atton asked, in a mocking tone.

Sera sighed. She knew Atton would behave like this.

“I’m sorry Atton,” She told him, “I’m afraid this quest can be taken by Bastila and myself only.”

“You need a decent pilot,” Atton told Sera, hoping he could change her mind.

“No, Atton,” Sera warned him, “Kavar needs someone to look after…”

“What about the furball?” Atton interrupted, “When you and him were reunited, he promised to look after our child when we needed him. And this is a time that we need him to look after Kavar. Don’t tell me you don’t trust him anymore.”

“I do, but…” Sera began, only to sigh, “You’re right Atton. Roarboar is capable of looking after Kavar. But Bastila may not wish you to come along.”

“Hey, don’t worry,” Atton assured Sera, “Any lady can’t resist me. Look at the manipulative witch.”

Sera coughed out a little laugh.

“Kreia only tolerated your presence, because she believed you had use as a pilot,” Sera told him.

“And I have use now,” Atton replied, “As a pilot. So when do we leave?”

Once again, Sera sighed out loud. Another adventure had begun.

Last edited by Pottsie; 12-22-2006 at 04:52 PM.
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Old 12-22-2006, 03:33 PM   #33
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Wow, good chapter Pottsie, and Nihilus is back eh? Interesting
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Old 12-22-2006, 03:43 PM   #34
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Much, much better Pottsie. The dialogues and descriptions are much better here. There are only two small things I noticed, mistakes probably made because of rushed typing - it should be ''your hunger'', instead of ''you're'' and here:
Quote:
Sera and Bastila towards Carth, before leaving the Senate Chambers.
seems to be a word missing.

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Old 12-22-2006, 04:45 PM   #35
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Yes, indeed an interesting chapter. I can't wait to see how will Bastila react to Atton.
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Old 12-22-2006, 04:51 PM   #36
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Oh, trust me, the Atton-Bastila relationship will be a love-hate relationship. Nihilus is back and he is the only villian in this Fic. Thanks for the comments igyman and I'll edit the mistakes. I do admit, I'm rushing this Fic, mainly because I want to write the third part, because I have a good storyline planned for it.
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Old 12-22-2006, 05:26 PM   #37
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Haha...I like the chapter...Especially the showdown with Darth Nihilus and You, Diego Varen...It's a nice showdown..




| Muunilinst 10 | Real Life | Exiled Jedi Weapon Master | Ex-Sith Marauder | Gunslinger |
Killed in a suicide attempt of ramming his own ship, Ravager, onto the surface of Telos IV. --Casualty Report: Order 66
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Old 12-22-2006, 06:04 PM   #38
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Yeah, one between your former self and him...
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Old 12-22-2006, 06:18 PM   #39
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I wonder how'll that affect Sera.

Also, don't try to rush this, it may just get better than you would ever think.
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Old 12-22-2006, 07:18 PM   #40
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Good job pottsie...Attons going to be in a tight spot.

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