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Old 06-25-2007, 04:55 AM   #1
Shato Khan
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Exclamation My KotOR 3 storyline

CHARCTER CREATION
you chosse your chacters gender atrubitts starting feats class - JEDI counsalar Sentanil Gurdian
SITH Infiltrator Corupter Destroyer
you get jedi NPC robes like in K1 or sith NPC robes like in K1.Chose a light sabere color and hilt.
Chose aperance you get K1s and K2s built in faces then you have custom where you chosse hair color eye color skin color hair style.
START OF GAME
(cinamtic showing a rublic ship above coruosant being attcked by the Exchange) you wake up a message tells you to get your clothes ( basic jedi or sith robes) and light saber you get them a (female player Brown sholder lendth hair green eyed pale skin male jedi Male player dark haired blue eyes pale skind female jedi) jedi come in s/he shouts Damm!! the Exchange.
will be updated weekly

Last edited by Shato Khan; 06-26-2007 at 03:17 AM.
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Old 06-25-2007, 05:03 AM   #2
Sabretooth
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Okay, I understand you're new here but I really need to tell you something.

Try to get the spelling/grammar right as much as possible. I think you that you must know the spellings of general things like Republic, Damn, Sentinel, Guardian and so on, which you have either misspelled or shortened (rublic, damm, sentanil, gurdian etc.)

That was, very honestly, a little difficult to read. Try to make your reading a little more lucid and clearer.

And also, you might want to consider fanfiction writing in Coruscant Entertainment Center, down the block. I have a feeling a moddie will move this there...

And also, give us some more information. This is a ridiculously short chapter, unless it is a preview. Try to give us at least twice or thrice that information.


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Old 06-25-2007, 11:54 PM   #3
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ya i had and still have no idea of what your typing, if your going to shorten it at least make it understandable . EXAMPLE: anyone=ne1
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Old 06-26-2007, 12:32 AM   #4
Darca Lar
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Okay. You can't judge this one yet because it was two sentences. And also like the others said work on grammar and spelling. You could even use Word Processor and just cut and paste if that'd make it easier for you. But it's not really a big deal unless it's something like a resume or college essay.


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Old 06-26-2007, 03:15 AM   #5
Shato Khan
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three exchange gangsters run down the hallway the jedi does force push and knocks them into the wall you and the jedi draw your light sabers and attck the exchange gangsters don't stang a chance with no close combat wepons the jedi calls to you " lets get to the escape pods they've planted a bomb we have to get off the ship will blow apart in about 30 minutes."
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Old 06-26-2007, 09:47 AM   #6
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how about instead of a bomb make it like a horde of some weird-darkside-things that'll rip apart anything it sees. you'll have the choice to fight the horde intill all the jedi and civillians get out earning you lightside points. or you could run before everyone get into the escape pod before anyone else can and flee possibly causing hundreds of deaths of jedi and civilians earning you darkside points. id choose the latter since i always make evil characters.
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Old 06-26-2007, 10:23 AM   #7
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Why would you run from a bomb set to explode in thirty minutes? You can save the Republic a lot of credits if you just disarm it.
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Old 06-26-2007, 11:03 AM   #8
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I think he meant 30 seconds
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Old 07-02-2007, 02:21 PM   #9
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Not to be mean, but I think this one needs a little more thought put into it. I did like the idea of being a Jedi or Sith right from the start with a lightsaber. The starting character models were good enough for me, I don't think there needs to be any further customization, but that's just my opinion. It puzzles me why the Sith (if you choose that) would be fighting the Exchange on a Republic ship, unless I misread something.
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Old 07-03-2007, 09:49 AM   #10
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well on kotor 1 u start out on republic ship no matter what even if ur dark side
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Old 07-05-2007, 03:04 AM   #11
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i ment 30 minutes
you run down the halway and somebody grabs you and your companion and forces you into an escape pod with a blaster pointed at your heads.....

Edit: (this will only be the cannon dialoge and chocies and endings)
[cutsceen shuttle interior]
"They Escaped-how?" asks a tall figure wearing dark jedi robes with a mandlorian helmet to a female twilek also in dark jedi robes the twilek replies
" someone helped them"

Last edited by RedHawke; 07-06-2007 at 08:26 AM. Reason: Combining double post...
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Old 07-05-2007, 12:06 PM   #12
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Please, try to use proper grammar, it is quite difficult to read.

Other than that, it has good ideas, from what i can actually understand.


Let there be rock!

"I hope they realize that music is music, and that music is not a scene, not a style. Music is a beautiful ****ing thing to listen to. It is not a thing to ****ing preach to others about, it's not a ****ing cause. It is what it is—and that's a beautiful artform." - Synyster Gates

Check out my Fanfic:
Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: Embers of Destruction
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Old 07-05-2007, 08:51 PM   #13
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Too short & vague of a description, bad grammar - not a great start to a 'killer' sequel now is it?!
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Old 07-05-2007, 09:24 PM   #14
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Indeed..... I don't have that big a problem with grammar, but the the punctuation is really killing it :/

Other than that, I think this is extremely vague, not enough detail, and also dosen't belong on these forums. You might also want to check other people's sugestions for the story (*hint**hint*)
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Old 07-05-2007, 09:28 PM   #15
Fredi
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Dude... you grammar is horrible, check it dude and try to put more its too short …. And why the hell the exchange would attack a republic Star Destroyer? And how they got an army?...Are they stupid enough to attack a republic ship?



"Evil is a word used by the ignorant and the weak. The dark side is about survival. It's about unleashing your inner power. It glorifies the strength of the individual."
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Old 07-06-2007, 10:04 AM   #16
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You guys can stop slammin' him for bad grammer/spelling, it isn't very encouraging.

Quote:
Originally Posted by shadowtrooper69
well on kotor 1 u start out on republic ship no matter what even if ur dark side
In KotOR I you don't immediately start out as a member of the Sith. This story is assuming you are able to choose right from the start.
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Old 07-08-2007, 01:50 AM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Padawan
Dude... Your grammar is horrible, {improper word replaced} fix it {extra space snipped} and try to {improper word replaced}write more, it's too short{extra space snipped}…{extra period snipped}
Practice what you preach.

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Padawan
And why the hell the exchange would attack a republic Star Destroyer?
They wouldn't, the Republic didn't have Star Destroyers.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Sabretooth
We will be great failures one day, you and I
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Old 08-07-2007, 04:57 AM   #18
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Who are you you ask were the new jedi they reply........
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Old 08-17-2007, 11:38 AM   #19
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If they plant a bomb, how would the Jedi know about it with no explanation? How about when the exchange run down the hallway - before they see you, they talk about the bomb and when to get off the ship or something like that.
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Old 08-27-2007, 12:49 AM   #20
Darca Lar
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Okay, I think this guy has something. Just strip away the grammar, or any other problems you other guys seem to see so vaguely and just look at the basic idea. Sure it still needs a little more thought, but it has potential...


Yesterday is history. Tomorrow, a mystery. Today is a gift...that is why it is called the present.
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Old 09-10-2007, 04:16 AM   #21
Shato Khan
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What the jedi you use lightsabers not guns
lightsabers are obivoius
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Old 09-14-2007, 01:31 AM   #22
Darth Mania
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They wouldn't be switched on when walking down a hallway, so I don't think they would see the Jedi, even more so if the Exchange members are looking at each other, or if it was around a corner or something like that.
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Old 09-15-2007, 06:51 AM   #23
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first of all that is very much like the beggining of KOTOR I and two within every game you don't get your lightsaber for a while

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Old 09-15-2007, 03:56 PM   #24
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I think that it would fun if you start out with a lightsaber but lose it in a battle of some sort but, eventually build a new and better one. I also think that you should be able to get a new ship, I mean who wants the old beaten up and bruised Ebon Hawk for the third time ( if there is a KOTOR 3 of course) . I certainly think that!! I also think you not like either of the KOTORs. Something new should be in order, change is good people change is good.
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