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Old 02-15-2008, 09:54 PM   #1
Tysyacha
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[Badfic] I'm Here for the Party

(Author's Note: Revan fans will HATE, I mean H-A-T-E, this story!)

Awwwwl RIIIGHT! Not only do I get to crash a Sith party, I get to hang out (and hopefully hook up with) some hot Sith girls! Praise be to the Force, man!

Anyway, I only get to crash this party because I need a uniform. Sith digs. That's the only way that I'm going to get into the Undercity, where I've got to look for this escape pod. Sheesh. Who is this Bastila, anyway, that she's so important I have to crawl into smelly sewers and filthy underground slums to try and find her? She'd better not be some spoiled little Jedi princess.

Why am I thinking about that? It's party time!!! I'd better wear my best suit.

Oh, I forgot. It's my only suit. Too late to get it laundered. Oh, well. Most of the people at the party will probably be too tanked up on juma juice to care that I'm "Livin' La Vida Reek-a." That said, I'd better take a little sanisteam.

Ahhh...That felt great. Wish the steam would have been hot, though. Just because this is some low-rent Taris pad doesn't mean cold steam sits well with me. Let's see--Constitution Enhancer Implant (heh, heh), cologne...

Wow. Thought this was supposed to be some kind of swell party, but it's just some dingy apartment with a bunch of drunk Sith in it! Hey...perfect! Booyah!

"What's your name, baby?"

"Itreya."

"Sounds like 'betray ya' to me. Oh, well. Want to dance?" (I flash a grin.)

"Sure! Although I'd rather--hee, hee! Want some juma juice?" Y-EAH!

*************************************************

Oh, Foooorce...my head... Where am I? Oh, yeah, the Sith pad. Hey! Where's Itreya, that hot chick whose ship's loading ramp I inspected? Babe? Stang, she's gone. She left her uniform behind, though. J-j-j-JACKPOT!!!

Hey--this armor clings in all the wrong places. It's too tight. Man. It figures that when I'm too sauced to care, some Sith girlie leaves HER suit behind. Shang. Now I'm supposed to traipse all around the Undercity looking like a girl. Although in this suit, who's going to notice or care? Not many, I hope. Otherwise I'll have to put up with Carth razzing me all the way off Taris!!!

Bastila, I hope you're H-A-W-T for all the trouble I'm going through to get ya!
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Old 02-15-2008, 10:01 PM   #2
DeadYorick
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You made Revan seem like a drunk and a player. Thats not much of a side that I would have thought he had


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Old 02-16-2008, 01:45 AM   #3
Arcesious
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That story was one fry short of a happy meal... Or one fry to many...

(That means i didn't liek the stroy, as I'm a Revan fan)


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Old 02-16-2008, 02:30 AM   #4
The_Catto
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I'm a Revan fan and I loved it!
It made me laugh from start to finish.
Great work!

That's my type of party. :P

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Old 02-16-2008, 03:23 AM   #5
Rev7
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^^^
I thought it was pretty funny. It did make my laugh in some of the parts. I honestly wouldn't think that Revan had a side like that. If he did, I think that he wouldn't be that, well, urr, crazy.

Interesting to say the least. :}

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Old 03-17-2008, 12:11 AM   #6
Hawkstrong16
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I am a Revan fan and I loved it!

It was funny!


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Old 03-27-2008, 01:35 PM   #7
Jedi Eagle 27
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I am a Revan fan and this is one of the funniest fics I have ever read! PLEASE keep going with this story!!!! It's hilarious! I wish Revan really had that personality in the game. It would make Kotor a lot funnier.
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Old 03-29-2008, 11:51 AM   #8
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I nearly spewed my Diet Pepsi at the 'Constution Enhancer' line. I laughed through the whole thing.


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Old 03-29-2008, 11:59 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tysyacha
Hey--this armor clings in all the wrong places. It's too tight. Man. It figures that when I'm too sauced to care, some Sith girlie leaves HER suit behind. Shang. Now I'm supposed to traipse all around the Undercity looking like a girl. Although in this suit, who's going to notice or care? Not many, I hope. Otherwise I'll have to put up with Carth razzing me all the way off Taris!!!

Bastila, I hope you're H-A-W-T for all the trouble I'm going through to get ya!


Hell yeah, a female Sith uniform.


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Old 03-30-2008, 01:59 AM   #10
Tysyacha
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If y'all liked this fic, check out its brand-new sequel: "Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbest"!
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