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Old 01-19-2009, 09:22 PM   #1041
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Granted. But they do more of this instead.

I wish I could build a robotic monkey of intricate design

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Old 01-19-2009, 09:27 PM   #1042
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Granted, but it has the IQ of a monkey and destroys itself.

I wish I could create a weapon which would catapult me across space.


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 01-19-2009, 09:38 PM   #1043
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Granted, you burn up in the atmosphere.

I wish I were a salmon of delicious proportions.


Let's kill ourselves.
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Old 01-19-2009, 10:16 PM   #1044
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granted, but you die after mating in a random river somewhere. And no one tastes your deliciousness.

i wish i had a lamborghini reventon



mfw I read the Revan novel

it is not a cry of joy.
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Old 01-19-2009, 11:18 PM   #1045
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Granted, but you're not insured for it.

I wish I was Matt Smith.

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Old 01-19-2009, 11:24 PM   #1046
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Granted, your not THE Matt Smith, you're a Matt Smith that happens to be in prison.

I wish I had Charlie Chaplin's hat.


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 01-20-2009, 12:12 AM   #1047
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Granted, but it's rotten from several decades of disuse, and crumbles to dust.

I wish it was the right temperature for me to wear my Fedora.

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Old 01-20-2009, 12:53 AM   #1048
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Granted, but it's fedora linux, and you look like an idiot with a computer on your head. What were you thinking man? You aren't David Bowie.

I wish I had superb toe dexterity.


Let's kill ourselves.
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Old 01-20-2009, 03:55 AM   #1049
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Granted. But you grew up as a female in Imperial China, had your feet bound as per custom, and your toes fell off...Remember!

I wish I had the ability to traverse the mall with the power of my mind powering the muscles in my legs to power me along as I traversed the mall...

mtfbwya


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Old 01-20-2009, 12:17 PM   #1050
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Granted, but that's the only you thing it controls and you pass out due to the fact that the blood needed to power the rest of your body is stuck in your brain or in your legs...and you fall...hard....


I wish I had the eyes of an eagle.


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 01-20-2009, 03:57 PM   #1051
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Granted, but you have the body of an ant.

I wish Star Wars: Battlefront III would actually be made.


Quote:
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It is LucasArts.
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Old 01-20-2009, 03:59 PM   #1052
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Granted, but it's made 150 years after your death....at 113, waiting for the game.

I wish I had Battlefront 3, right now


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 01-20-2009, 05:23 PM   #1053
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Granted. But you don't have the system to play it on

I wish I loved in Red Formans house
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Old 01-20-2009, 08:35 PM   #1054
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Granted, but doing so counts as a break in.

I wish I could wallrun.

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Old 01-20-2009, 08:48 PM   #1055
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Granted, but now you can't walk.

I wish I could use the MATRIX!!


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 01-20-2009, 10:08 PM   #1056
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Granted. But your spine sockets are faulty and you get plugged into the disney channel instead

I wish I could get the assemble the religious and scientific leaders of the world and make them start a fight club.

mtfbwya


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Old 01-20-2009, 10:38 PM   #1057
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Granted, but the police raid the place and all the religous and scientific leaders blame it on you.

I wish I had a riot police shield.


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 01-20-2009, 11:11 PM   #1058
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Granted, but people think you're a police officer and start a riot all around you. Shields only cover one side.

I wish the next president were a lesbian and did the whole 'first family' thing with her wife and three kids, two adopted Chinese daughters (who are hot) and one stem-cell built test-tube baby (who is also hot).


Let's kill ourselves.
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Old 01-20-2009, 11:21 PM   #1059
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Granted, but she gets assassinated by some bigot shortly after the inauguration.

I wish for the next Prime Minister of Canada or the next President of the United States, whichever comes first, to be an openly bisexual Atheist.

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Old 01-21-2009, 02:39 AM   #1060
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Granted. But he/she is also openly a monkey and throws poop at you.

I wish the ultra rich could be made to swim through manure to prove their worth as manure swimmers.

mtfbwya


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Old 01-21-2009, 03:40 AM   #1061
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Granted. But they make you swim through manure shortly after
I wish I was the original Numa Numa guy
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Old 01-21-2009, 04:21 AM   #1062
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Granted. But instead you become a large wild cat wearing sports gear and end up being the Puma Puma guy.

I wish I could pull a hat out of a rabbit

mtfbwya


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Old 01-21-2009, 09:09 AM   #1063
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Granted, but it's covered in rabbit blood, and that's impossible to get out.

I wish you were a monkey.

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Old 01-21-2009, 09:37 AM   #1064
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Granted .However, Mr Darwin was wrong, and I actually was created by a magical giant in the sky after all

I wish Mr Darwin was a magical giant in the sky

mtfbwya


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Old 01-21-2009, 09:39 AM   #1065
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Granted, but he's not a god, he's just a magical giant.

I wish for a world without religious intolerance, or religious hindrance of progress.

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Old 01-21-2009, 09:49 AM   #1066
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Granted. But then you learn lesbian mud wrestling is a religion and you become a pious man

I wish for a world religiously and intolerantly hindering people as it progresses (in its orbit around the sun)

mtfbwya


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Old 01-21-2009, 09:54 AM   #1067
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Granted, but you could never make this post because the internet never existed due to religions hindering progress.

I wish for Earth to strongly resemble Coruscant.

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Old 01-21-2009, 10:08 AM   #1068
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Granted. Unfortunately, you have severe vertigo and cant leave the house, so it might as well be like Earth. Heck it probably was all along....!

I wish for subatomic particles to be sentient and go on strike when they dont feel like being part of matter.

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Old 01-21-2009, 10:20 AM   #1069
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Granted, but that includes the ones you're made up of.

I wish to conquer the world using a religion that worships bacon.

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Old 01-21-2009, 10:31 AM   #1070
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Granted, but people find out you believe in neither religion nor bacon.

I wish people would leave religion and politics out of these topics!


Quote:
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It is LucasArts.
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Old 01-21-2009, 11:22 AM   #1071
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Granted, but now it's much less interesting.

I wish for bacon mixed with fudge.

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Old 01-21-2009, 11:27 AM   #1072
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Granted, but it tastes so awe full it will never enter production.

I wish I could find the time to play WoW again. I have the opposite-addict syndrome. I don't have the time to play

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Old 01-21-2009, 11:54 AM   #1073
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Granted; you found the time, but you don't like WoW any more.

I wish for fudge mixed with turkey bacon.


Quote:
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It is LucasArts.
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Old 01-21-2009, 12:25 PM   #1074
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Granted, but you eat it, and the chemical reaction forces your stomach to explode.

I wish I had tons of tons of BACON!


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
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Old 01-21-2009, 01:00 PM   #1075
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Granted, but it falls on top of you, crushing you to death.

I wish for a wish, which wish has no loophole whereby it may be ruined.

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Old 01-21-2009, 04:35 PM   #1076
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Granted. but that wish creates a paradox which then destroys the universe

I wish I had thousands upon thousands of Frito lays snack crackers
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Old 01-21-2009, 07:19 PM   #1077
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Granted, but you're buried in them, and die from lack of oxygen and over eating at the same time.

I wish for some "Fried Crap With Spicy Sauce."

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Old 01-21-2009, 08:29 PM   #1078
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Granted, but the "Fried Crap" is gnat poop.

I wish that I could take over the world.


Quote:
Originally Posted by LordJhredmo
It is LucasArts.
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Old 01-21-2009, 08:49 PM   #1079
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Granted, but you don't feel like doing so.

I wish for three garbage cans that say TRUSH instead of TRASH.

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Old 01-22-2009, 04:12 AM   #1080
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Granted. But they actually say THRUSH and now your genitals are itchy

I wish for a world without cows, just breast milk

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