Join Date: Jan 2004
Just had this dream. I'm going to jot down as much as I can before I forget it.
I'm in space, breathing perfectly. Don't see any galaxies or other bodies, just random stars. There's... a large stone ring I'm standing on, about two standard meters thick; radius unknown. It looks to be of some old civilization. There are numerous "sections" on the ring, each section holding what looks like a letter from some alien alphabet.
I can... feel the stone shooting through the cosmos, spinning wildly, although I cannot perceive it directly because of my relative position. There's another being on the ring, about 6 feet high, slightly hunched and leaning on what I thought was a cane, but turned out to be some sort of a sceptre.
He has red skin, menacing, reptilian eyes and a lean, grimacing face. It looks... unsettling. I don't know what species he is. He's staring into me like he's launching an entire space fleet into me. My gaze averts.
Rotating along the axis of the ring. She is so pristine, so beautiful, so ethereal. Words cannot describe her, and I forget even the Force when I look at her. It is as if she absorbs it, swallows it whole, and presents me the result; herself. Merely looking at me, she sets me on fire, breaking me, freeing me, tempting me to the Dark Side itself. She is the Force.
#43 res polana
the writings of kreia were true after all
i knew it there is more to this world than the absolutes the force presents us and are further misinterpreted by the jedi and maybe even the sith
it all makes so much sense now
Watching the endless expanse of space. The Emerald has stalled. Engine failure, the droid says. He annoys me. His programs must be at least fifteen years old. He won't let me talk to the Captain, and everyone on board seems to be busy with the problem to talk. Well, at least they're not not working.
Somehow, I'm feeling very strange by this. There's something more than a simple engine failure here. Or maybe the Force is telling me that this will lead somewhere bad? I've begun to believe in the Force's predictions; they've turned out to be startlingly accurate. Master Vi was right, then. I wish she were still alive to be acknowledged.
I can just feel it. It's boring into me as I record this. There's a hole here, it's like an empty gap of nothingness. Very unsettling.
#59 New Mission
Looks like there's going to be a change. No doubt disappointed by my "lacklustre" and "irresponsible" performance in handling the illegal blockade at Res Polana, the Council has decided to send me somewhere "easier". That would be the world of Kalzeron, home of a feudal people named the Kalzerians.
The mission will be to assist a Republic diplomat in establishing a trade agreement with one of the major kingdoms. Assist.
#71 Bad Feeling
There's something here that shouldn't be. I'm probably just oversensitive, but that dream has just disturbed me and there's no one to talk to here. I've also tried contacting Master Fio'kolla, but it's not working.
I hate it when you can't get a connection.
Something at Res Polana seems to have disrupted my natural rhythm, my cadence with the Force. I feel more impatient, more curious, more, well, aware. It's like I'm looking for something I don't know myself. I'm also seeing strange dreams that I can't recall after waking up. But I just know that there's something in them.
faster faster faster
let me be one or let me free
#82 Power Outage
The lights just went off. The door's not opening. All I can see are the stars through the massive window. Well, I'm glad I love the stars. Space; it's so beautiful, so epic, so majestic, and yet so empty, lonely, so inviting.
I want to sink into, meld with it. It is like the Force, only a Force without all the disturbances, without all the unpredictability, the imperfections. Space is the only thing complete, eternal, beautiful. I
no tress no tress no this is not it do not follow her she will stop we are here it is done don't waste it now don't lose it
#84 She's Here
I left the previous entry unfinished. She's here. I know it. I can feel my heart beating. Like entire planets crashing against each other in cacophonous, imperfect symphony. She's here. I saw her leave the room, smiling gaily, almost grinning evilly.
The door opened. There's still no light. The corridor's dark. I still found her, though. Why won't I? She is the greatest light there is, the absolute illumination, burning brighter than all the stars in the universe. She turned around a corner.
I am following her. I know not where I go. But I'm following her. May the Force be with me. Because I'm going to follow it anyways.
There's a bad taste in my mouth. The alien steps ahead, crosses one section. I stand my ground. It starts to speak. I don't know what it's saying, but it's frightening. Or maybe it's just his voice.
His voice is loud, bombastic, deafening. His eyes fully open and his skin rippling in red waves, he looks...
His arms are shuddering hard, almost at the very amplitude of his voice. His eyes are bulging open, his lids almost ready to tear off entirely, his mouth looking like an threatening, black tunnel into infinity.
I can tell that he is concerned with powers that are not derived from the Force, but parallel to it, almost competing with it, on an entirely another dimension, occult, fiendishly mysterious, stupendous assaults of
I know she is suffering. I can see her hands, open palms. I want to lay my palm in them. I go on. The minute I step out of the ring and towards her, I feel an astronomical force shudder through my legs, twisting and throwing me into contortions unimaginable.
The ring starts breaking up, shaking violently. The being... is just to horrifying to look at; too insanely scary...
Suddenly I feel a gush of euphoria; I am being shot into hyperspace, my mind surrenders, my body has disappeared. It is the most exhilarating agony imaginable.
Tied to the Force. We create waves on our threads and lick the morsels of energy we bring forth. The Force. And we think we control the Force. How foolish are the Jedi. The Force controls us.
Kreia. Her teachings were the truest. And the Jedi realised this, and they detested it. The thought of not being the most powerful in the galaxy horrifies them. But now I know so much more. If only I knew where she was.
#44 Shindi ra Spulani
It's a very strange feeling you get when you think of how much the Jedi have learned to use the Force to their own ends. Pulling entire mind tricks on people, defying natural abilities... we are gods. Monastic gods? What?
And what if we aren't it all? We are only crafting the Force to suit our purposes. Maybe there's someone higher, blanketed from us, hidden from us, pulling mind tricks on us? Having powers to great, they are inconceivable, unbelievable, invisible, deathly. I think Master Vi said something like this once, most probably at a lecture. She called it "Shindi ra Spulani". I don't know, I was so small.
#56 Jedi Paranoia
I think they're watching me. They don't trust me. I just know they're going to take a crack at this journal. How can I prove my loyalty to them when all I do disappoints them? I'm going to double-encrypt this journal and use some anonymisation protocols I found.
Dark. Glowy red eyes are looking at me. Glowy. Glowy. She's disappeared. I can still see Space. So nice.
Tress: *indistinct* are you?
Tress: *indistinct* from me! Leave me hull-loan!
Unknown: *indistinct* jekka wirta (?)
Tress: What did you do to her? Don't touch
(It seems many lines in this conversation are "indistinct". Please upgrade your translation packs, recalibrate the voice device, or adjust the microphone. Refer to the help manuals for further instructions.)
(6 Indistinct instances found. Enable Forced Identification?)
Tress: You are. But you can't be. You will not have me. I will not be tempted.
Unknown: Firm break tusk breath night creak
Unknown: *indistinct* jaded brick *indistinct*
Tress: Then we will be one. I will love you forever. I will be one with you. May the passions of *indistinct* in. Liberate me!
Unknown: *indistinct* nut
This Automatic Transcript has been created with Mosstli Transcript 5.
In a centrifuge I spin, with a counterweight on the other side, spinning with the same speed as me, competing, chasing, coming after me, consuming, hating He is of the dark side, and I of the light. He comes behind me, and I behind him.
And we spin around the radiant axis of the Force, oh how, as we in our vain spirits chase its power, twisted by our own effigies of understanding, broken in our intellect and spirit, falling into the Force and letting it pick us up, why won't it stop?
But it won't stop, will it? It just comes with me, exhilarating, filling, breathing so much soul into my life, into my cause, I can feel it now. I can feel it and the string attached to it, a thread of glowing bright light, purer than the purest elements.
And on the other, black darker than space itself. And an energy so vile, so hideously dark.
Yes. At last I'm here. The spaceship is gone. Now I am alone. I am stable. There's stone below me, and stars around me. And below me, I feel an energy working its way up, coursing itself through me. Oh yes, I can feel it now without hindrances, the power of the letter of Nutkha.
Oh how lucky I am, to be on the same vessel that would cross paths with the supreme chariot of Nurath'kanna. Oh how foolish I was to be blinded by the mortal words, by the words of those who have not even known the Force.
The darkness in space is so calming, despite the turbulence is holds within it, stretching into the millions and billions of star systems and planets and the lives teeming within them. The Force and its undulations across it, caressing Space, disturbing it, while poor Space, with its eternal darkness beckons for
The great stone ring of Nurath'kanna, the great Sith wizard shall grant power unconceivable, but why must it be defiled by one when it can be melded with the infinity, when it can be breathed and felt. It must be found. For in its finding the complement shall be consumed, the supreme shall be felt, the two shall be one with the Force itself.
#93 die jedi die
The chant is irrepressible. And why not? The Jedi is illogical. He is chasing her. He is insane and must be stopped. Why does she continue to guide him? Why does she continue to shine so, defying Space, defying me. I hate her. And I hate the Jedi. In my darkness I will consume them both.
I find it amusing how sentients like to call light "power". As if being in darkness is a torment. A torment.
#73 The Unification
And when the force is well and high, there shall be a time of judgement, and the Force will despair, it will seek to call the two and keep them in their perpetual orbit, and the true test shall be, and if they win, they shall break free of their bonds and become free, great masses of energy that will have broken free of the Force's accord and possess power over the Force so great, even she will fall at their knees.
I can feel the tension tightening.
#94 The Halls
The time has come. The chilling has erupted and the power is tingling. The Force is crying, she is crying profusely, she is being destroyed, she is losing at her eternal game. Soon I shall be the one to dominate her, I shall walk these great halls of power, not won by light nor dark, not knowing nor ignoring, not insane nor genius, I shall be the greatest being this galaxy has ever known.
And I shall be called the Reckoning.
I've been wondering. What happens after the Circle of Nurath'kanna? Do you get to become one with the Force? Do you get to destroy the Force? Become it? Maybe you become the greatest Jedi or Sith ever. But then, wouldn't that be the same as being the Force?
And more pertinently, what made Nurath'kanna in the state he is now? Why couldn't he break the centrifuge?
Freedom. A state unexplainable. A state formerly unattainable. Now I see the Space and I love it truly.
It breaks, it spins, it shrouds in mystery as I dissolve my perception
Why wait for the inevitable if it is so destructive; please it by
Power is infinite. The Force is infinite. The Space is infinite. I am now infinite. I am now begun.
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