lfnetwork.com mark read register faq members calendar

Thread: BFA's Poetical Place for Poetical Things
Thread Tools Display Modes
Post a new thread. Add a reply to this thread. Indicate all threads in this forum as read. Subscribe to this forum. RSS feed: this forum RSS feed: all forums
Old 01-08-2009, 04:33 AM   #81
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
- Forever Outsane, Inbound -


Some might say that I am a lonely man,
I walk down a lonely road by myself.
But they don't look close enough,
I walk more crowded than any man can.

Memories entwined in time,
circling layers upon layers of deaths rhyme.
Ethereal sense, my corporeal beast.
Eating away my sins; what a feast.

A boxed up mind, I walk the line.
The line between dream and reality.
Beneath each rhyme is a truth inside,
look me in the eye, swear your fealty.

Paradoxial world, scream your whispers.
Unspeak your deepest and darkest secrets,
and I will listen.

To steal my thoughts is to steal my core.
But not to worry, I take you soul,
All in all, you are forgiven.

Many are a part of this world of mine.
Many are not aware of this world in time.
Some things I take more myself, your pain.
But not to worry; I'm not insane.

Cry, cry, cry useless tears for me.
You're only crying because of you,
for what it is to be,
now and forever, you are me, and I am you.

Some might say that I am a lonely man.
I walk down a lonely road by myself.
But inside I am anything but alone,
I am eternity; I am through; I am scared; I am you.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 01-12-2009, 08:03 AM   #82
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
- The Soft Touch of Death's Unknown -


Black days,
brighter nights -
forsee my life.

Sickening breeze,
with what do I see?
Fire, in hell, in strife.

String theory,
Mediocre metaphor,
with what do I give thee?

Stricken misery,
that, do I adore,
in life, am I free?

Are our sins ever forgiven?
Forgive me if I've never tried.
It this the end, or the beginning?
Please don't go back, to when I cried.

I suffer to see thee in pain.

Thy lay in frost,
suffer the cost,
may you rest in peace.

Tenderness lost,
what do you want most?
To stick true to your belief.

To see the garden,
to watch your mind harden,
to be with no memory.

Walk within grass,
watch you life run past,
can you ever forgive me?

Truth is what I'll always seek,
truth is something I hope I never find.
I look to the future, my god is it bleak,
I am sorry that I must leave you behind.

I pray to the wind that you can find your way through the rain.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 01-12-2009, 10:33 AM   #83
CommanderQ
I should go.
 
CommanderQ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: California
Posts: 2,630
Current Game: Mass Effect
Forum Veteran Roleplayer Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Excellent work, Mr. BFA The first work was very good, very excellent, very emotional Very good in my opinion, I listend to sad music with both...you definately mastered the emotional ability in these poems. The Second work's 'story' sort've caught me as the character in the story was wandering and wondering what was the truth, partially hoping not to find it, possibly in fear. It was indeed emotional and touching, and in a way, quite sad. Excellent work, Mr. BFA! Post more poems!!!!!


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
CommanderQ is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 01-12-2009, 07:21 PM   #84
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Cheer's, CQ. Glad you liked
The Second was supposed to give that effect so I'm glad that that worked out

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 01-15-2009, 06:49 AM   #85
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Just a few little pieces to keep things going. On the spot so forgive me if they seem ... crap, lol.






Forget all that you have ever known, nothing can save you now. Grow these lies whose seeds you've sown, ominous faces you stare and scowl.


================================================== =

Live the day for forgiveness, tell that person everything you want to say. Fill up your emptiness and take me away.

================================================== =

Sacrifice your wings dear angel,
relieve me of my sin's.
Help take me away from this hell,
take me now, before it begins!

================================================== =

I watched you fall from grace,
you stood there right in front of my face.
Your words, they cut me like a knife,
my blood drips, leaving trails of my life.

Such a sweet little demon you were,
you sat there whilst you watched them burn.
We'll never die, we'll never leave,
we'll never cry, you better believe.

I'm cutting all the threads,
Not to worry, even when you want us dead.
I see you lie as you sow the stitch.
No time to escape, we're stuck here with this witch.

The mirror shatters from your nasty web of lies,
down in the depths of your ocean of demise.
So come here my sweet necropolis,
satisfy until its over, my sweet little paradise.

Will you be my sin?

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 01-21-2009, 06:11 AM   #86
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
[[Wow, I seem to be posting more and more darker things lately... Weird...]]


Blackened Soul


How long? How long will I have to stay here for?
I stare at these four walls every minute of my never-ending day.
Their stares, their stares shake me to my very core.
Will I ever find you? Will I ever find a way?
To free myself from this pain inside.

My melancholy chorus is my dream,
wandering down a blackened hallway all I see,
is my pride and sadness fall into one,
I try to see the sky, but I can't see the sun.
No, I can't see the sun.

My mind is deep and my scars are fine.
Without this cup of sanctity, all I taste is a bitter wine.
Somewhere underneath my sea of dreams,
lies a chest of pearls and my sweet release.
Ferry my tears from all these years,
to the stars above. To where nothing is never enough.

The treasure inside is the boulevarde of all that breeds salvation.
Lines and lines of miracles, the war has just begun.
I look to the sky, but I can't see that sun.
No, I can not see the sun.

Fires in waves, in smokey smiles,
no more days, say goodbye, I'll see you in a while.
Contemplating me own way, will it ever be the day.

Pretty girl, with a cold smile, she touches me inside.
My fanaticism is just a pen on paper when I see her eyes.
My blinds are open they show me the world.
How cold it is, how warm it is, how different it is when we coincide.
When we take a walk on the otherside.

Down a tunnel where time stands still.
My face in front of a camera what's not real.
Orange bubble of a circle unfinished,
roll down the hill, to nothing, break the seal.

Pop another sense of reality,
no words can explain this fealty.
Tear down this wall, it's not me anymore,
too much colour, too much say,
too much feeling in a non-talking way.

Fall down into a spiral of unrealistically safewords.
These chains hold me down, make sure to undo them afterwards.
Under the layers of black and white, something is wrong, something isn't right.
Pull out the needles and the pins, no matter how much I want it, I will never win.

Blacker days, and blacker nights,
no lightning in this cloudless fight.
I look up to the dark sky,
but no I can't see the sun.
No, I can't see the sun.

Where I go and what I know is something that I never know for sure.
I walk down the road and end up at a dead end street.
My life, my soul, my lies all bottled up into one,
where they meet, how they sound, if they even notice the sun.
No, they don't even notice the sun.

In my room there is no shine,
there is no universal rhyme.
No fall of any kind, except for my own eyes on the ceiling above.
Can it be fine?
Will it ever be fine?
I look in the book for the definition of love.

Vibrations of my sanity, caress the walls of society,
and in the end will I get to see all that I was meant to be?
Inside the layers of our soul, the war has just begun...
But I can't see the sun.
No, I can't see the sun.

Forgive me life, my darkened life, will I ever find it won?
I await the day where I will see, if whether or not that day will come.
The day where I will finally be able to see the sun.
Where I will see the shine.

Forever outbound in my sanity,
in this box of cliche memoirs, I swim in vanity.
But the day will come, this I know,
Where I will see it end of snow.
Where everything will be won,
Where I can finally see the sun.

I can finally see the sun.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 01-23-2009, 09:36 PM   #87
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
You must have alot of spare time

Very nice, as per usual, but I still stand by my comment where you'll never outdo that one poem, brilliant nonetheless.

That last one though, it seems more like lyrics for a song, almost seems like something Opeth would write, which isn't a bad thing


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 02-05-2009, 01:05 AM   #88
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
@Bini:Lol, I don't have that much time, I just like to quickly write this and that down whenever I can. Glad you liked it, and yeah, I like some of Opeths material as well.

Here's another that I wrote just last night.


- Untitled -



I tried to help,
why couldn't you see?
The screams and words you belt,
you forgot about the most important thing.

Our lives were intertwined ever since that day.
I just hoped and wished that I could find a way.
To help solve all of the problems, from all the letters we sealed,
but the deeper I reached, I realized,
that not all wounds can be healed.

Every wrong turn took you down a deeper hole.
Some nights you refused to come in and stayed outside in the cold.
I write this now, and I put everything I mean in bold,
hoping that you will take notice of these words pouring from my soul.

You, we, would stay out all night,
we'd have a good time, then come home and fight.
Everything we did to ourselves, we knew it wasn't right,
but we did it anyway, hoping to see the end in sight.

I choke on the fumes of my clean, yet abhorred life.
Sometimes I just want to get back the better days.
Strife, is a welcomed ingredient, but then I remember just how much it pays.
Pays to walk down the roads we've been;
to see the demon's we have seen.

I tried to help,
why couldn't you see?
The screams and words you belt,
you forgot about the most important thing.

That not all loves have to be unrequited,
to live life, is to care. And to die is to live.
Please, just remember all of our mistakes and forgive.
Forgive me.
That's all I ask.
Forgive me.
And I will not fail in this final task.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 02-06-2009, 04:02 AM   #89
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Interesting, dark and beautifully written, although it really could use a title :/
Maybe something like Darkness Eternal? I dunno...


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 02-06-2009, 05:06 AM   #90
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Yeah, I tried thinking of a title when I wrote it but I just couldn't come up with one hey.
Cheers for comment, btw.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 02-06-2009, 11:22 AM   #91
CommanderQ
I should go.
 
CommanderQ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: California
Posts: 2,630
Current Game: Mass Effect
Forum Veteran Roleplayer Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Very excellent work, Mr. BFA!! I must say that it is quite emotional and the story is quite touching. I look forward to more, so POST SOON!!


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
CommanderQ is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 02-26-2009, 05:06 AM   #92
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Thanks CQ

OK ... Now ... For this next one, I give a warning:
If you are a person with strict morals and strong beliefs and wish to not tred amongst the darkest side of life, I warn you to beware and slowly walk back and turn away from this screen (or just click back and whatever) and stay away from this poem.

If, however, you wish to stare into the depths of my mind and see how dark and twisted and broken a human mind can be, then by all means ... Read on!

Read it, and then ask me what it is about (if you don't already know) and I will gladly divulge what you wish to find out.
I would say enjoy, but this poem is not meant to be enjoyed in anyway. It is meant to be feared, and sad.
I do not mean to be cliche, but I say feared, because this is always a possibility in one's life that he/she must try to stay away from.

Here it is:

Injected Heaven


Here I am,
with needle in hand.
No more lies;
it's no surprise.

Trying to keep the demon's out,
before they start to shout,
again, I pierce a vein,
help me please, keep me from going insane.

You can't save me (why can't I save myself?)
Don't disdain me (I can't live without your hell)

It's time to say,
what you already knew,
it's come to that day,
where you and me are through.

I have to say this,
before I die,
even if I can't escape it,
I might as well try.

I need you, I want you,
I love you, but I despise you too.

You are my drug induced bane,
my outlet of my insanity.
Without your touch, it's never the same,
when I look in the mirror, all I see,
is your vanity.

I try to hide,
from the demons outside.
But they still peer in,
seeing me; that I'm still alive.

They don't like it,
they scream at me,
to get back in that bathroom,
where I'm meant to be.

Every time I see the sky,
you pull me back down,
I scream out, "why?"
but you just sneer at me whilst I drown.

Are you the Devil?
Is this my hell?
Am I dead?
I cannot tell.

I sit in the dark corner,
and rock myself to sleep.
I say everything's fine,
try not to cry,
but a split second later, I begin to weep.

I need you, I want you,
I love you, but I despise you too.

All my thoughts and fears,
I write in this book.
I keep my mind away from your ears,
but you always manage to get a look.

You taunt me with whispers,
Of all these false dreams.
I laugh and snicker,
whilst my mind is tearing at the seams.

I'd cut up another line,
but I'd rather die,
Grab that needle, and
jam it in my eye.
Anywhere but there.

Forgive me if I fail,
God knows that I tried,
I'd love it if I just died,
but that'd be too easy,
I'd just end up in here,
getting ready to cry.

You torture me,
by slowly killing me.
You tear and rip at me,
but keep me alive so I can see.

That nothing will ever come my way,
it's repeating itself over and over again.
My blood goes drip, drip, drip down the kitchen sink.
As my eyes start to blur,
I can't even being to think.

I finally die, yes I float away.
I can't believe it ended this way.
But then I stop and open my eyes,
it was all just a dream, another one,
of your many lies.

Sing softly to my broken heart,
for voices scare it and give it nightmares.

Here I am,
with needle in hand,
no more lies,
it's no surprise.

I need you, I want you,
I love you, but I despise you too.



================================================== ==================================


Last edited by The_Catto; 03-01-2009 at 08:59 PM.
The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 02-27-2009, 01:01 AM   #93
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Wow...

Words cannot describe that, so I won't bother.

Although I would like to know what it's about, I didn't quite figure it out.


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-01-2009, 08:51 PM   #94
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Drugs.
It's about doing drugs.

The allure, the temptation, the effects...

One of the worst mistakes a person can make is by doing the aforementioned.
From what I have gathered (from certain sources I've come across the past few years) They know that it is killing them, they know that they have to stop, but to stop would be to lift of a warm blanket off them during the middle of a freezing cold night.

Its meant to be a deep insight into just what can happen.

I'm not trying to be a preacher or anything 'cause I believe that people should do what they want, try what they want and just have fun. Just don't let it carry you away until you can't see even yourself in the mirror anymore.


So yeah, that's what its about.
Hope I cleared it up for ya, Bini

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-02-2009, 02:22 AM   #95
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Ah yes, it does fit.

Very well done


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-12-2009, 08:35 AM   #96
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
What's that you say? I light-heartened piece and not a dark and depressing or dark and ... dark .. piece???? YAY! Thank God herself!

Yes people. Finally. A light hearted piece inspired by a VERY special person I know Ahhh.... So good.
Anyways ... Here it is!:


================================================== =======================

Sea Gypsy

A pair of converse shoes, and a big top hat.
I bet that you wish, you could look like that.
Orange hair, and masquerade mask,
I know whats under that coat;
I don't have to ask.

Striped and spotted spinning parasole,
I grit my teeth as you steal my soul.
Your power over me, sweet sanctity,
with your stare over there you strip me
maliciously.

Sometimes I wish it's true,
that the world was spinning round and round,
but always stopping when I suffer, and always
going when I give up her, but with a smile
and a wink, I don't have to think.

Slick hair, shiny eyes and a mouthful of surprise,
Keep me up at night, it's OK, it's alright.
That rain patters on the roof, fill me up,
to satisfy your sweet tooth.
Come here, my psychadelic fantasy,
be my beautiful and innocent, Sea Gypsy.

F, C, G and end it with D,
the only sweetest progression is you and me,
try not to throw me away like another utility,
I'm a man, and yours I'll be,
if you promise to be my, Sea Gypsy.

Wash your pills down with a shot,
no need to worry when you're on this type of hot,
streak,
and no matter what, whatever we'll be.
you'll always be to me, a beautiful and
innocent, Sea Gypsy.

================================================== ===================
I likes

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-13-2009, 11:08 PM   #97
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
I refuse to believe you wrote a light-hearted piece

Beautiful piece nonetheless, although I prefer your dark stuff


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-13-2009, 11:56 PM   #98
CommanderQ
I should go.
 
CommanderQ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: California
Posts: 2,630
Current Game: Mass Effect
Forum Veteran Roleplayer Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Well, you have definately proven yourself to be an excellent poet of both light-hearted and dark poems! Excellent work, and I hope to see more soon!! You are quite the poet!


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
CommanderQ is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-25-2009, 09:17 PM   #99
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
@Bini: Haha, well beleive it. I wrote it
@CQ: Cheers, CW! Always a pleasure to hear that about my work

New thing:

- Untitled -

A smile like a wiltered rose,
excessive abuse with spit.
Stick me with your needled love,
pierce my heart, rip it out, tear it.

I'm not a killer but a spellweaver a seducer too,
I'm just a scar in your life when it is through.
I choke you with my stare until your mouth and eyes turn blue,
I will stick you with my crucifix of shame and see what ensues.


How's that for a darker one???

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-26-2009, 04:30 AM   #100
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Geez, talk about dark

But, to be honest, I didn't like it, the rhymes were a bit off, such as 'spit' and 'it', the choice of words was not to my liking, and it was a tad short.

Just my 2 cents

Hey, I can't like all of your poems


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-26-2009, 04:55 AM   #101
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Haha, I happen to agree with you though, Bini.
This isn't my favorite.
Mostly cause it was an on the spot type of thing and I wasn't really putting much effort into it.

I'll make sure to try harder next time

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-27-2009, 01:25 AM   #102
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
That's probably a good idea


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-27-2009, 07:38 AM   #103
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
In response to the previous "poem" ... I present this:

Lost Angel

A two bit pyjama shirt,
and a flower printed bra.
You stripped me of my dignity,
and threw me face first in the dirt.
I wish I knew where you are now,
so I can show this thing I've wrote for you.

I seen the devil in an angel suit just the other day,
It must have been halloween somewhere, up there.
I never knew, I'd feel like this,
until you winked at me,
After all the drinks I was blind,
but now I can see,
that not all of it was bad,
but it was bad enough.
I can see
every little detail, and what I once though
smooth is now hard and rough.

I should make a few calls and start a band.
We'll have the whole world in the palm of our hands.
We'll pick up a beat,
sing bout you whilst sweating in the heat,
out on the other side of the street,
shuffle, shuffle, shuffle, move your feet...

... I'd rather stand.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-30-2009, 02:10 AM   #104
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
To be honest, I didn't like this one either, the first two lines ruin the rest of the poem, it sounds lighthearted, and then all of a sudden it goes dark, best keep it in one mood. The lines were also screwed up, some too short, others too long.

Did not like it, sorry.


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-30-2009, 09:36 AM   #105
Arcesious
Trolololololololololololo
 
Arcesious's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: NE
Posts: 1,876
Current Game: Mass Effect
Whoa... I never knew...

Wow.

Okay, I'm definitely favoriting this thread. These poems are works of genius!


Please feed the trolls. XD
Arcesious is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-31-2009, 10:50 PM   #106
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
@Bini: Ouch! Lol. Okay, ot seems I have a more affinity with the darker side of poems than lighthearted. Fair enough, I'm not complaining, I like that idea!

@Arc: Now THAT'S praise and a half! I thank you!

Been busy the last couple of days so no new material yet, but I will make sure to have some soon!

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-31-2009, 11:03 PM   #107
CommanderQ
I should go.
 
CommanderQ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: California
Posts: 2,630
Current Game: Mass Effect
Forum Veteran Roleplayer Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Well, this last poem was slightly up and down...I liked it but, I wasn't quite sure how to establish it as...but excellent work nonetheless! Post more soon!


you very much
If a tree would fall in the woods.....would the other trees laugh at it?
CommanderQ is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 03-31-2009, 11:31 PM   #108
Darth_Yuthura
Banned
 
Status: Banned
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Vienna
Posts: 1,585
Current Game: KOTOR III
Impressive
Darth_Yuthura is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 04-07-2009, 12:36 AM   #109
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
^^^ Thanks

Another one people. I went back to what I do best and came up with this. Be honest and tell me what you think!

- Unholy Wars -


Heirs to Babylon,
sickened feelings of the darkest macabre.
Serve to which is wrong,
speak till your tongue is spent and barred!

Hail to the faithful,
the serpent king awaits.
Seeds sown from the hateful,
succulent virgin taste.

Darkened wizard, serve your servants fears.
To be away with thee! Curse away those holy tears.

Sweet endorphin,
lined with kin.
Thy cannot allow in,
whereas filled with sin.
Execution Avatar!

Strike me down with your black magics,
and I shall rise again.
Death after death, in life will I win,
and thy will be more than your master expects.

Stoic misery, your feet are getting weary,
better yet now to stop this fools march.
Dreams which are scary, are but a loose fitting fairy,
finish me off now, before your death can come to pass.

He took a look at thee,
with sweet eyes full of melody,
and in them I could see the sea,
a sea of stricken hope and hopeful misery.

"Bring all your amarda, this war will be won.
I will destroy all life, beginning with your son!"

This he cried over the gore-filled plain,
I could see from here, his mind was no longer sane.
Destroyed by grief, sanctioned by strife,
his hate was fuel for me,
it returned me to my natural life.
If only could it have been.

Such a tragic kingdom,
to raise on our own.
Just thee wait, the time will come;
a flower will grow from where the seed was sown.

Satan's incognito,
death upon the throne,
heave the last remants below,
up above, to where he rests alone.

Heirs to Babylon,
sickened feelings of the darkest macabre.
Spare me of your insolence,
and wreck havoc for me, cry in pain,
make me laugh.

Death, is only a manner of speaking.
A dream in which, for some is real.
Please do not tell me what thee is thinking,
open the box, do it!
Break the seal...

...And make me laugh.


Last edited by The_Catto; 04-07-2009 at 12:39 AM. Reason: God dang spelling mistakes!!!!
The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 04-07-2009, 12:57 AM   #110
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
That's better

You're longer poems seem to have a sort of, lyrical influence, maybe by band like Opeth or Alice in Chains, which is a very good thing.

Kudos to you again


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 04-07-2009, 01:40 AM   #111
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Cheers!
I don't mind Alice in Chains, but Opeth I could go without. (My cousin listens to them religiously and I just can't stand in hearing another one of their songs again for a long, long, long time hahaha. He plays them that much!)

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 04-07-2009, 06:24 AM   #112
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Heh, I've been doing the same thing with In Flames recently, drives my mates nuts, except the ones that also love In Flames


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 04-07-2009, 06:37 AM   #113
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Haha yeah, the same with me with Metallica, and Motley Crue and Marylin Manson.
Usually at least 3 - 4 times a wekk I blare out the playlist with all those albums for a few hours.

Drives everybody who's here nuts (even though they love those bands as well! hahaha)
Ah well .. all in good fun.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 04-09-2009, 05:37 AM   #114
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
- Upon The Hill of Grace -


I feel so lost,
I can't find my way.
What did it cost
for me to see this day?

I thought that I could,
I thought that I would,
be who you wanted me to be,
but I failed, and here I am now.

I'm just another one of God's children,
who's lost their way.
Can you ever forgive me,
for seeing through to this day?
Some say that Life will go on ...

I still remember what happened.
Like as if, it was yesterday.
I thought it was the end,
but what happened next, I can't say.

My dying breaths,
were salvation from death.
But as I tried to help you,
I realized that I couldn't even help myself.

I'm sorry that I couldn't do it,
I'm sorry that I failed.
I'm worried that you'll never forgive me,
even if I died and seen you in heaven ...
... Or hell.

What happens now?
When all the light has faded from my sky?
What happens now?
When everything I do is a failed try.
I just hope that I can finally be who you wanted me to be.

Some say that Life will go on,
some say, that my hollowness will fill in.
Some say, that the hurt that I feel will heal.
Some say, but some say, that it will never feel real.

I stand here now,
on the cliff to see the truth.
As I reach out to you, the wind pushes me back.

I wonder how,
if my pained memory will ever be soothed,
but as I cry ... I will to gain back what I lack.

I feel so lost,
I can't find my way.
What did it cost,
for me to see this day?

I'm waiting,
I'm breathing,
I'm hoping that this day will finally end!

Tell me the truth.
Can I ever find happiness again?
Please tell me now,
that this isn't really the end.

I trust you,
I love you,
I see you....

... But I'm content to hate myself.

I don't want to die.
I just want to lie here.
And look to the sky,
and dream of what is to come.

Please forgive me.
I'm sorry.........

I felt so lost,
I couldnt find my way...

Until now...

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 04-09-2009, 05:44 AM   #115
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Whoa. I think we have a winner...

Is what I'd be saying if we were holding a contest

Very, VERY nice, brilliant, probably up there with your best, nicely done.


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-04-2009, 12:27 AM   #116
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Ha, cheers Bini!
I was a little hesitant to post that one.
Just wasn't sure about it.
There was something I thought that didn't fit right, but I just couldn't pick what it was! I guess that didn't matter much though, lol.


A new one.
Written when I was in one of those moments where a relationship can seem so good at the time but you know that its only a matter of time until that ends.



- When You're Around -


When you're around,
I can see everything that's in front of me.
I can hear that sound,
of how lovely your voice can be.

When you're around,
I can remember where I have been,
I don't have to scream,
I don't have to dream,
Nothing is ever what it seems,
when you're around.

When you're gone,
everything seems so wrong,
but after so long,
when I write this song,
I knew that I could get along,
without you.

It seems to me,
that we will be,
something out of a horror story.
But now I think,
that we won't sink,
and a horror story isn't so bad for me.

When you're around,
I'd rather be alone.
But when you're gone,
I feel too alone.

Can you see my predicament?
Being stuck in this sentiment,
but having no way to get out.

When you're around.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-05-2009, 05:37 AM   #117
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Eh.

I didn't really enjoy that one, you didn't do anything wrong in the sense of what makes a good poem, I just didn't really like it.

Ah well.


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-11-2009, 01:34 AM   #118
The_Catto
The Rhythm Schism
 
The_Catto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: New South Wales, Australia.
Posts: 1,199
Current Game: KotOR
Contest winner - Fan Fiction 
Ah well indeed. :/

Anyways. I have started work on a piece that I plan to have unfold into an epic poem.
Not epic as in awesome or the best ever (although, when I am finished, hopefully it will be just that lol). It will be a time before I post it entirely, but I will keep updates on it and still post smaller poems/lyrics here and there.

Anyways .. Just a small update.
And, so that wasn't a waste of your time ... here's a little something I wrote yesterday.
Enjoy


- Untitled -

Starlight,
so bright,
against the shattered sky.

Death fight,
bitter sight,
kneel down in prayer and listen to the lie.

The oceans crashes,
the wind smashes,
so much for eternity.

Whip lashes,
skin deep gashes,
destroy her fertility.

Sing a song in desperation.

Owls fly over,
rats take cover,
snakes, they poise to strike.

Into the never,
journey takes forever,
be careful to avoid the bite.

The_Catto is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-11-2009, 03:02 AM   #119
Rabish Bini
Sydney Roosters Genius
 
Rabish Bini's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: NSW, Aus
Posts: 2,128
Current Game: KotOR III
Now that's what I'm talkin about!

The only down side I have for it is it cuts out too quickly!

But awesome nonetheless, good luck with your 'epic poem'


Yes
Rabish Bini is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Old 05-12-2009, 05:55 PM   #120
Salzella
areiK
 
Salzella's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,135
Current Game: Portal, Half-Life 2.
i like these a lot despite some prejudices on my part (i don't like rhyme in poems i think it can sound forced and contrived - though you've avoided that for the most part). bit dark though
Salzella is offline   you may: quote & reply,
Post a new thread. Add a reply to this thread. Indicate all threads in this forum as read. Subscribe to this forum. RSS feed: this forum RSS feed: all forums
Go Back   LucasForums > Network > Knights of the Old Republic > Community > Coruscant Entertainment Centre > BFA's Poetical Place for Poetical Things

Tags
awesome, awesomeness, awesomenessssa, cool, isss, metallica, penguins

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:04 PM.

LFNetwork, LLC ©2002-2011 - All rights reserved.
Powered by vBulletin®
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.