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12-16-2008, 11:49 PM
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#1
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Dapper Chimp
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 8,145
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Musical instrument strikes Nicole Kidman barren
You heard it here first folks.
Quote:
Aboriginal actor and language teacher Richard Green says, "People are going to see Nicole playing it ["it" being a didgeridoo; a aboriginal horn] and think it's all right. It bastardises our culture. I will guarantee she has no more children. It is not meant to be played by women as it will make them barren."
And Alan Madden, a cultural officer at Sydney's Metropolitan Local Aboriginal Land Council, adds: "I presume she doesn't know, otherwise she wouldn't be playing it."
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Emphasis mine.
Reports have indicated that Kidman will now travel to some other country which still has a native culture in order to seek out a similarly sacred musical instrument which she hopes will restore her fertility. Experts have advised her husband, country music star, Keith Urban to avoid copulating with her until the curse has been lifted as a precaution.
Everyone please include Nicole Kidman's ovaries in your prayers tonight. Thanks!
EDIT: oh, btw link |
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12-17-2008, 12:04 AM
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#2
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CHEATER (Apparently)
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Sunny Arizona
Posts: 1,173
Current Game: Team Fortress 2
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Jeez...Why didn't she listen to aboriginal dude? C'mon, be smart.
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12-17-2008, 04:31 PM
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#3
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NO GAMES
Status: Super Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: RIP LA 1982-2013
Posts: 5,876
Current Game: TOR/Skyrim
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 I purchase a didgeridoo and a bullroarer in 1990 as souvenirs of my trip to the land down under. The bullroarer I’ve allowed anyone that asked a chance to use, but the didgeridoo as remained hung on my wall.
I believe it is time to get it off the wall and allow two of my cousins a chance to play it.  |
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12-17-2008, 06:27 PM
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#4
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Well past expiration date
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 5,764
Current Game: Mass Effect
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Truly a topic worthy of the Senate.
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12-17-2008, 07:04 PM
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#5
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The New Tax Collector
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Thailand
Posts: 1,898
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Achilles
You heard it here first folks.
Emphasis mine.
Reports have indicated that Kidman will now travel to some other country which still has a native culture in order to seek out a similarly sacred musical instrument which she hopes will restore her fertility. Experts have advised her husband, country music star, Keith Urban to avoid copulating with her until the curse has been lifted as a precaution.
Everyone please include Nicole Kidman's ovaries in your prayers tonight. Thanks!
EDIT: oh, btw link |
Hmm, never heard of this... I know what a didgeridoo is, in fact I've played one, I even owned one at a point in time... Never really got good, but I've never knew they had "restrictions" on playing it... Funny thing is, the person who taught me to play it was a woman... 
Looks like a fruit cake to me. - Brutus
Quote:
Originally Posted by Q
I don't want to get my hopes up, but it's like the planets are aligning or something. |
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12-17-2008, 08:48 PM
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#6
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Dapper Chimp
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 8,145
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tk102
Truly a topic worthy of the Senate.
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*sniffs the air for sarcasm*
Yeah, at some point we'll circle back around and broach the subject of cultural superstitions.  |
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12-18-2008, 12:57 PM
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#7
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NO GAMES
Status: Super Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: RIP LA 1982-2013
Posts: 5,876
Current Game: TOR/Skyrim
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Achilles
Yeah, at some point we'll circle back around and broach the subject of cultural superstitions. |
What are you saying this is all a superstition? After I had my cousin blow on the didgeridoo last night, I told her she could stop borrowing money from me to fill her prescription.  |
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12-18-2008, 04:01 PM
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#8
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obama.png
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: `(•.°)~
Posts: 7,997
Current Game: all
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Achilles
*sniffs the air for sarcasm*
Yeah, at some point we'll circle back around and broach the subject of cultural superstitions. |
Then drift over to debating evolution.
"No, Mama. You can bet your sweet ass and half a titty whoever put that hit on you already got the cops in their back pocket." ~Black Dynamite
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12-18-2008, 09:33 PM
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#9
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Dapper Chimp
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 8,145
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mimartin
What are you saying this is all a superstition?
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Crazy, huh?
Quote:
Originally Posted by jmac7142
Then drift over to debating evolution.
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That depends on whether m@rs makes an appearance or not. |
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12-19-2008, 08:19 PM
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#10
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The New Tax Collector
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Thailand
Posts: 1,898
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Nah... I'm not going to bring it up...
Looks like a fruit cake to me. - Brutus
Quote:
Originally Posted by Q
I don't want to get my hopes up, but it's like the planets are aligning or something. |
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12-20-2008, 02:55 PM
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#11
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Sine Amore Nihil Est Vita
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 3,395
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Quote:
Originally Posted by M@RS
Nah... I'm not going to bring it up...
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Thank fossil record!
spoiler:I hope you appreciate my humor, Achilles
_EW_
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12-20-2008, 03:01 PM
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#12
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Dapper Chimp
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 8,145
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EnderWiggin
Thank fossil record!
spoiler:I hope you appreciate my humor, Achilles
_EW_ |
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12-20-2008, 11:04 PM
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#13
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Moderator
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Chicago
Posts: 3,406
Current Game: Everything Zelda
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Nicole Kidman is Australian?
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