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Old 08-04-2001, 08:33 AM   #1
Redwing
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Microsith

An interveiw taken from http://www.microsith.com/

Darth Rich: Darth Fences, let me begin this interview by saying what a great honour it is to be here with you today.

Darth Fences: Thank you.

DR: Firstly, I'd like to ask how things are going with the company? How are your plans shaping up?

DF: Everything is going as planned. The Republic will soon be in my command.

DR: You have come under fire recently for your treatment of other software producers. What do you feel Microsith should do about it's competition?

DF: Wipe them out...all of them.

DR: Don't you think that's a little harsh? You are currently being investigated by the Senate for exploiting your market position. How does that make you feel?

DF: Good. I have the Senate bogged down in procedures. By the time this incident comes up for a vote, they will have no choice but to accept our control of the system.

DR: But things were looking pretty bad for Microsith at one point. What happened?

DF: Enter the bureaucrats, the true rulers of the Republic, and on the payroll of the Trade Federation, I might add.

DR: So lets discuss the competition you do have. The "Open Force" movement, lead by Linus Torvalds, is gaining popularity among many of your ex-users, especially academics. What about them?

DF: They have grown strong. Only together can we turn them to the dark side of the Source.

DR: But what about Universities? They use other, Light Side systems. How do you plan to deal with them?

DF: Move against the Admin first...you will then have no difficulty taking the Users back. Students are young and naive. I find controlling them not to be difficult.

DR: What of Richard Stallman?

DF: We have a new enemy - Linus Torvalds. He could destroy us. The Source is strong with him. The son of Torvalds must not become a Hacker.

DR: What if he were to work for you?

DF: Yes. Yes. He would be a great asset. Can it be done?

DR: I doubt it.

DF: He will join us or die.

DR: But that's impossible!

DF: ...not for a Sith...

DR: But Linux will only grow in popularity...

DF: Perhaps you refer to the imminent release of RedHat 6.1? Yes...I assure you we are quite safe from your friends. Everything that has transpired has done so according to my design. Your friends out there in Durham... are walking into a trap. My Empire is quite safe from your pitiful little band. I have given NTie away free to everybody in every University in the Galaxy! Oh...I'm afraid the deflector shield will be quite operational when your friends arrive.

Ahem, sorry, getting my speeches mixed up again.

DR: Giving it away to everybody? Doesn't that create a monopoly? Is that legal?

DF: I will make it legal.

DR: I should have known. Only you could be so bold. The Senate will not stand for this, when they hear you've attacked they will retaliate in kind.

DF: The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Source.

DR: I can't believe I'm hearing this...

DF: I find your lack of faith disturbing. Perhaps you think you're being treated unfairly.

DR: You promised me an honest interview...

DF: I am altering the deal. Pray I don't alter it any further.

DR: I'll never use your software.

DF: It is useless to resist. Don't let yourself be destroyed as Apple did. With our combined strength, we can end this destructive conflict and bring order to the galaxy.

DR: What about the claims that your latest Operating System won't be ready on time?

DF: Windows 5000 will be completed on schedule!

------------------
At last we will reveal ourselves to the Jedi.
At last we will have revenge.
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Old 08-04-2001, 01:34 PM   #2
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sounds about right.

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Old 08-04-2001, 03:37 PM   #3
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Two things:

First, does this not seem frighteningly like the Blizzard Chronicles?

and second, How many of us are going to ditch microsoft just because bill gate is a &%$#? I mean, how many of ported games and up on MACS, except maybe 5 years later? Anyone remmeber what happend to unreal tournament?




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Saber One

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Old 08-04-2001, 03:45 PM   #4
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everyboy here is making ignorant comments to things that they don't really understand...

first of all, microsoft is not some sort of evil corporate empire; in fact most microsoft programmers are young and even their *ahem ceo is younger than most.

second of all, red hat is nothing compared to freebsd, which is the most secure distribution of BSD avaliable, and the most secure operating system in general.

it is a myth that microsoft computers are *SO* easy to hack, as most DoS attacks are on both IIS (MS) and Apache (Open). furthermore, Macs are most likely the easiest to hack, being a weak port of UNIX (meaning os x).

of course microsoft makes lame products. but, microsoft is not the only os which suffers from security holes.

the mentality of the "evil empire" is pretty stupid, since all of my MS software is downloaded from edonkey. (www.edonkey2000.com).

so please stop being so ignorant and talk about things you fully understand.

thanks.

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Wedgie returns.
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Old 08-04-2001, 05:42 PM   #5
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i get sick of people ditching bill gates, he's just a normal person with a successful business.

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Old 08-04-2001, 10:59 PM   #6
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Hello people...the article never mentions Bill Gates...it's "what if Palpatine was running Microsoft"? thus the Microsith. It's not making fun of Microsoft from what I can tell.

BTW 15'er I totally agree with you, Gates is just a normal person with an extroadinary business.

And Wedgie2, you obviously didn't read my post or anything the interview said whatsoever, so you're sounding VERY ignorant yourself.

-No one said Microsoft was "some sort of evil corporate empire".

-No one ever said anything about "red hat" or whatever. The interveiw made a joke about it. (In the style of the "This is madness!" spam quotes.)

-No one said anything about the hackability of MS computers.

-No one said anything about MS having lame products.

-In fact, no one said anything negative about Microsoft at ALL!!!

So I believe, in answer to your arguments, I woud like to quote you:
Quote:
please stop being so ignorant and talk about things you fully understand.
(Ah well, what do you expect from a sock puppet imitating some ancient forum member? This guy seems really lame.)

------------------
At last we will reveal ourselves to the Jedi.
At last we will have revenge.
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Old 08-05-2001, 12:12 AM   #7
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Arrow

And if you're going to ***** Microsoft, at least get your facts straight. The most secure *BSD is, by far, OpenBSD. The FreeBSD core team doesn't do proactive security audits of their code. Don't get me wrong, I use FreeBSD whenever I have a chance (at home, at work, on the laptop, in the shower), but when I want top-notch security, OpenBSD's the only solution.

4 years without a remote hole in the default install. FreeBSD (and about 95% of other unices) had a terrible, terrible remote hole in telnetd recently. Most of them still do. Then again, anybody who runs telnet should be shot to death with a bean gun.



------------------
Moff Kint
<A HREF="http://www.openbsd.org" TARGET=_blank>
</A>
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Old 08-05-2001, 12:30 AM   #8
Redwing
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This is getting stupid. No one freakin' cares. This thread is for HUMOR. Not sales pitches, Kint and Wedgy-imitation.

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At last we will reveal ourselves to the Jedi.
At last we will have revenge.
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Old 08-05-2001, 12:35 AM   #9
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First of all, I was putting that guy in place.

Second of all, BSD is free. Hard to make a sales pitch for something that's free, huh? Wanna buy a can of air?

------------------
Moff Kint
<A HREF="http://www.openbsd.org" TARGET=_blank>
</A>

[This message has been edited by Kint (edited August 04, 2001).]

[This message has been edited by Kint (edited August 04, 2001).]
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Old 08-05-2001, 12:43 AM   #10
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Okay, sorry for jumping on you like that Kint.

A can of air? How much?

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At last we will reveal ourselves to the Jedi.
At last we will have revenge.
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Old 08-05-2001, 12:49 AM   #11
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For you? Free.

Now I'll just need your credit card number to confirm your age ... A small fee of US$ 357648736,34 E75 will be applied for processing. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart.


------------------
Moff Kint

When all other means of communication fail, try words.
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Old 08-05-2001, 02:13 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by Wedgie the Second:
it is a myth that microsoft computers are *SO* easy to hack, as most DoS attacks are on both IIS (MS) and Apache (Open). furthermore, Macs are most likely the easiest to hack, being a weak port of UNIX (meaning os x).
seeing as how I actually am an Expert on this stuff I thought I'd bring up the Webstar one of the most secure webservers in the world is Mac only and has never been hacked...any moron can make IIS screw itself if they want to, and the Mac OS Encryption and Network Speeds make it a Superior operating system than anything Microsoft Fields...and yes I have used XP so don't try to bring that up....I make my living running a network and I KNOW which computer hold onto there security the Longest its the Macs by Far. Pc security is a Joke. thank you and have a nice day you ignorant little sap

[This message has been edited by Rogue9 (edited August 04, 2001).]
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Old 08-05-2001, 02:20 AM   #13
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Comm: Welcome to Microsoft
Wedgie: You Scuk
Comm: Uh, bill, come here a sec
Bill: Yes?
Comm: Wedgie here has something to say...
Bill: yes wedgie?
Wedgie: Uh, could i borrow a million bucks your highness?

Wedgie would bow to Bill if he showed up, and he knows it. Even Imitation Wedgie... (As real as SPaM.)



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Old 08-05-2001, 02:34 AM   #14
Redwing
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LOL

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At last we will have revenge.
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Old 08-05-2001, 03:04 AM   #15
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as a side note once I have someone's IP I can make their computer freeze constantly pretty easily...though I don't crash IE ever though Redwing might have trouple believing that
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Old 08-05-2001, 03:07 AM   #16
Rogue9
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Quote:
Originally posted by S1DC:
and second, How many of us are going to ditch microsoft just because bill gate is a &%$#? I mean, how many of ported games and up on MACS, except maybe 5 years later? Anyone remmeber what happend to unreal tournament?
I wouldn't know...I've had unreal and Quake3 on my mac since they came out for PC...Elite Force too. 'course thats probably not true for everyone...if I remember right ID always does its initial game development on Macs because of the commaon platform and software. so screw you windoz lovers.
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Old 08-05-2001, 03:15 AM   #17
Redwing
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Quote:
Originally posted by Rogue9:
as a side note once I have someone's IP I can make their computer freeze constantly pretty easily...though I don't crash IE ever though Redwing might have trouple believing that
You're right, I don't

------------------
At last we will reveal ourselves to the Jedi.
At last we will have revenge.
  you may: quote & reply,
Old 08-05-2001, 04:13 AM   #18
TK-421
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Quote:
Originally posted by Wedgie the Second:
everyboy here is making ignorant comments to things that they don't really understand...

first of all, microsoft is not some sort of evil corporate empire; in fact most microsoft programmers are young and even their *ahem ceo is younger than most.

second of all, red hat is nothing compared to freebsd, which is the most secure distribution of BSD avaliable, and the most secure operating system in general.

it is a myth that microsoft computers are *SO* easy to hack, as most DoS attacks are on both IIS (MS) and Apache (Open). furthermore, Macs are most likely the easiest to hack, being a weak port of UNIX (meaning os x).

of course microsoft makes lame products. but, microsoft is not the only os which suffers from security holes.

the mentality of the "evil empire" is pretty stupid, since all of my MS software is downloaded from edonkey. (www.edonkey2000.com).

so please stop being so ignorant and talk about things you fully understand.

thanks.

could you repeat that in english???

------------------

Jar-Jar before I gunned him down.
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Old 08-05-2001, 07:15 PM   #19
TK-421
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FIne. completly ignore me.

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Old 08-05-2001, 10:47 PM   #20
Rogue9
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ok we will
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Old 08-05-2001, 10:49 PM   #21
TK-421
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Hey!!!

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"You killed my father!! Oh. Wait, I don't have a father. Well, Your Ugly!!! So die!!"
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