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Old 01-15-2003, 03:35 AM   #1
Lunatic Jedi
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The Alien Invasion: The Swampies Retaliate

The Swamp hangars are a scene of chaotic hustle and bustle as pilots, crewmen, and warriors prepare themselves for the coming battle. This will be the battle to end all battles, for this time they are fighting not for the Swamp, but for the good of all the galaxy.

After the past events, Lunatic sought advice from the the elder council of the Swamp, and they have acknowledged that the aliens are a threat to all life in the galaxy, and must be destroyed.

Lunatic has immediately decided to mobilize the full fleet for an all-out assault on the alien's homeworld.

"Okay, let's get moving!" barks Lunatic. "All soldiers into the cruisers, 3000 per cruiser. We have to launch quickly before they even have a few hours to recuperate!"


http://linuxsupportdesk.net/pichost/...unaticJed1.gif removed [img] tags due to HTTP 401 response --tk102

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Old 01-15-2003, 08:11 PM   #2
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Re: The Alien Invasion: The Swampies Retaliate

what is the point of this thread


Dont mess with retarded scientists.
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Old 01-15-2003, 09:14 PM   #3
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Its a continuation of the Alien Invasion thread.



ckcsaber brushes of the dust from his green coat, while walking towards Lunatic Jedi. With a friendly pat on the shoulder to Lunatic, ckcsaber says “Just here to let you know that you have my spear on your side Lunatic. The Swamp needs all the help it can get, to teach those scum a lesson about invasion.”

As ckcsaber turns to go he says “Oh, and tell your crewman to take care of my Headhunter.”
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Old 01-15-2003, 09:58 PM   #4
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do you have a link


Dont mess with retarded scientists.
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Old 01-16-2003, 01:51 AM   #5
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[Out of character] Here you go: http://www.lucasforums.com/showthrea...threadid=88051 [/out of character]

Lunatic turns to topshot

"Don't worry. They'll keep the Headhunter safe."

Lunatic tilts his head slightly, smirking...

"You know that power suit looks very slimming on you!"


http://linuxsupportdesk.net/pichost/...unaticJed1.gif removed [img] tags due to HTTP 401 response --tk102

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Old 01-16-2003, 09:42 AM   #6
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Back aboard the Swampie Carrier Spoiler, her escort gunships Stickie Thread and N00b of Fire, I feel at home.

Only a few days have passed since the near defeat on home turf, but now we rally together than take the fight to the bugged ba$tards that tried to take us on.

My squadrons are reformed, and Nova is back to full strength, although this time I have but 8 B-Wings. I have wangled a mixed unit, taking 2 interceptors, a Manta Ray and YT 2400 for my groups protection and for more tactical options.

But most importantly - the defenders live.

All are aboard, Lunatic in earshot with his trademark chat up technique. I have never stuck round long enough to see if it works... Umm...

'Bridge, this is Commander Wolf. Looks like all air forces are ready. Can we have an eta?'



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Old 01-16-2003, 06:18 PM   #7
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*jumps in ship* *tags along behind everyone else.*


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I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-16-2003, 10:42 PM   #8
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Quote:
Lunatic turns to topshot

"Don't worry. They'll keep the Headhunter safe."

Lunatic tilts his head slightly, smirking...

"You know that power suit looks very slimming on you!"

Topshot:"Um, why thank you! I'm right behind you guys."


*takes off in a Metroid-like ship, trying to catch up to the others.*


This battle is going to be good, Topshot thought,Those b@$t@rd$ are going to be dog-meat! If all goes according to plan, those aliens will soon meet a real challenge. Look out, I'm coming, scum bags!


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-17-2003, 07:53 PM   #9
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"after a long trip the swampies arrive on the planet....*whispers to lunatic, whats the planet called again*" says insanesith narativly


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-17-2003, 10:53 PM   #10
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*exits his F-15 like spaceship*
(to lunatic)"I got some photos from orbit, do you want em?"


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-18-2003, 04:12 AM   #11
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"Sure."

Lunatic grabs the probe photos and whistles in awe.

"Holy hell. They have some IMPRESSIVE ground defenses, most of which are for taking out fleets. Well, we have long range weapons, I think we can take them out before they can do much damage. Their infantry is tough. Well, by numbers anyway. They don't have much in the range of vehicular combat, so our land, sea and air vehicles have them beat right there.

"But still, the infantry! Almost the whole population of the planet is militarized, so civilian casualties aren't much of a concern. But by sheer numbers, we're at least 200 to 1. Still, we've beat those odds before. I think we'll be able to do it again."

Lunatic pauses for a moment then opens a channel to the bridge crews of the entire fleet.

"Okay, we're still out of their sensor range, but when I give the signal, I want all the cruisers and artillery ships to open fire on the surface. Aim for their ground-to-space weapons. Then, I want all the fighters and dropships to mobilize immediately and make a beeline for the northwest continent. That's where we'll begin seizing territory. Fighters: you escort the dropships. They have our whole landing force on them, and we can't afford to lose them. Don't concentrate on destroying the enemy's counterratack, focus on protecting the dropships. The rest of the fleet can handle the counterrattack."

A grave silence falls over the comm channels as Lunatic prepares to give the signal.

"...
...
...
...
...

NOW! "


http://linuxsupportdesk.net/pichost/...unaticJed1.gif removed [img] tags due to HTTP 401 response --tk102

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Old 01-18-2003, 09:11 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lunatic Jedi
"Okay, we're still out of their sensor range, but when I give the signal, I want all the cruisers and artillery ships to open fire on the surface. Aim for their ground-to-space weapons. Then, I want all the fighters and dropships to mobilize immediately and make a beeline for the northwest continent. That's where we'll begin seizing territory. Fighters: you escort the dropships. They have our whole landing force on them, and we can't afford to lose them. Don't concentrate on destroying the enemy's counterratack, focus on protecting the dropships. The rest of the fleet can handle the counterrattack."
The plan - nice and simple. Hit the swines with heavy barrage to both catch them off guard and cause confusion.

And my part in this.... Well, I am still in charge of air operations, so looks like I am to lead the aerial assault.
Good - I can do more good than i would groundside.

Quote:
A grave silence falls over the comm channels as Lunatic prepares to give the signal.

........
........

"NOW! "
The order was given, so I ran for Spoiler's portside hanger. Already in their ships were the rest of nova, the Manta Ray and YT2400 standing just off the carriers bow already waiting for us.
I boarded White Witch and prepared to join them.

Even before I had left the hanger's safety, the fleet unleashed their first wave of barrage shots.
Energy poles wider than even my Togorian pilot winked from vision below the planet's atmosphere, nothing seen of them or their strikes.

'Okay, on may mark, all vessels follow me and the Nova's in.'

The carriers Gungan Fury and Siggy Pic had loosed their cargo, the ships forming up with Spoiler's compliment.

Another barrage of man made lightning was thrown, signifiying our impending window of opportunity.

'Ships from the carrier Spam Maker have formed up.'

Good - all craft accounted for.

'Right. After the next barrage, we have the clearance to go start making our way planetside.'
I continue my orders, 'Watch for resistance - and their AA defense are meant to be something - leave it well alone for commandos to deal with.'

Then the final barrage - the last of ten or twelve strikes, and silence... then the comm call - 'GO!'

Dropships and fighters, bombers and escorts - at once we descended, like bats out of hell, the very place the aliens were about to become well aquainted with!



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Old 01-18-2003, 09:29 AM   #13
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"Okay, so I guess I am in charge of ground combat."

*takes a tank and spots an alien horde.*

"Soldier, load me a missile. I'm gonna spank 'em!"

"Ooookay, sir. Missile loaded, sir."

*launches the missile towards the alien battle tanks.*


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-18-2003, 11:54 AM   #14
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*sees an empty alien tank with an injured alien running twoards it*
well, it doesn't get any easier than this
*shoots the alien, steals the tank and radios in for them not to shoot at hm*


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-18-2003, 12:02 PM   #15
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Topshot, Jokemaster, and their men keep spanking the aliens with their missiles.

"120 aliens mowed down. And not a moment to spare."

*Radios Nova.*

"What's the situation up there, Nova?"


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-18-2003, 01:20 PM   #16
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'YEEE HAH!'

Things are good. These Alien dumb dumbs were so taken aback, they had only launched 40 odd fighters to intercept, and they were ***** cats.

We were knocking the out on the ground before they could take off.

Even the AA guns were not all up and going...

'topshot, no worries here!'

Doom blooms filled the view screen like a carpet of roses, each fiery red and pure white for their instanteous existances.

No worries at all.



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Old 01-18-2003, 02:06 PM   #17
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A headhunter, stuck in orbit above the alien planet lies dead in space.

"Dammit! They didnt take care of her!" yells ckcsaber from inside.

"Pips, lets try and get this thing working" he yells to his droid. Angrily he kicks his ship, jump starting all his systems.

"Blasted luck of mine."

The headhunter zooms towards the hell that is war.
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Old 01-18-2003, 04:25 PM   #18
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*InsaneSith runs up to Lunatic.* what you want me ta do man?


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-19-2003, 10:52 PM   #19
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Topshot keeps mowing down aliens, when a strange alien structure comes into view.

"Um, guys, I think we have a problem! Just as we live at the Spoon Acadamy, the aliens live at the Banana Acadamy! In my book, I believe that's a sign of total domination over all species in the galaxy."


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-19-2003, 11:11 PM   #20
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*finds alien armor in tank*
"Topshot, I'm gonna try to infiniltrate it, shoot at me, barely missing, on the way there, we gotta make it seem I'm an alien since the armor covers the whole body they'll never recognize me. I'll try to destroy it or make an entrance for you guys."


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-19-2003, 11:38 PM   #21
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"Okay, if you wish."

*Aims the tank's gun a little off to the side of Joke's to try and fake a hit.*

"Let's hope you have holo-images to make it look like I hit you, or else they may notice."


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-20-2003, 02:08 AM   #22
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Suddenly Insane jumps out and shoots his saber arrows straight into some alien heads.
"shot those motha ****as right between the eyes!" says insane sith excitingly


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-20-2003, 07:19 AM   #23
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*drives head-first (where the tank has the most armor) into one of the rounds, damaging the armor*
"It's OK"
Jeez, these guys built tough armor


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-20-2003, 09:57 PM   #24
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"Good. Now I'll use the force to mask your voice to trick the aliens into thinking you are one of them."

*Uses the force to allow Jokemaster to speak the aliens' native language.*


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-20-2003, 10:10 PM   #25
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*infiltrates academy, steals a mechaninc's uniform, gets on a forklift, filling it up with as many flamable things as he can and piling them up against the wall. Once the aliens take notice of this they start attacking, forcing Jokemaster to fire back. Jokemaster jumps off forklift, with a brick on the accelerator, and lets it crash into cans, creating a large explosion and a new, large, oddly shaped door, meanwhile Jokemaster takes cover behind a few crates, firing at the aliens*


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-20-2003, 10:37 PM   #26
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A strange power suddenly drains InsaneSith's golden spoon saber hilt of it's energies. Topshot takes notice of this, and looks inside the strange door while Jokemaster keeps firing and finds a Golden Banana-shaped lightsaber hilt.

"Oh man, no. This is not good. The Golden Banana Hilt drains everything just as the spoon empowers anything. It can even drain the golden spoon of its healing capabilities, re-opening our battle scars. I hope every one came prepared with bacta tanks......"


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-21-2003, 02:06 AM   #27
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just after topshot says that insanesith pulls out a little keychain with little remote.he pushes the button and a *click click* suddenly his ship flies and and dumps out bacta tanks.
"is this ok?" asks insanesith
then he pulls out the giant peanut and wishes for the spoons power to not be affected by the banana.


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-21-2003, 02:29 AM   #28
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Now fearing the power of the Banana Academy, Lunatic decides that there is only one way to secure its neutrality is to... well, neutralize it.

He opens a comm channel to the surface.

"Jokemaster, can you give me coordinates for the Banana Academy?"

Jokemaster crackles over the comm channel in reply.

"Sure. Its beta 6, gamma 9."

Lunatic opens a comm channel to the fleet.

"Alright, I want you to target beta 6, gamma 9 and begin a full barrage 40 seconds after my signal. Ready? Begin countdown from 40... now!"

Lunatic opens a channel to Jokemaster again.

"Jokemaster, you have about 40 seconds to get out of there before the whole place goes up in flames. Just thought you should know."


http://linuxsupportdesk.net/pichost/...unaticJed1.gif removed [img] tags due to HTTP 401 response --tk102

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Old 01-21-2003, 07:37 AM   #29
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"Roger that"
*steals tank again, exiting by rolling over the main gates this time*


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-21-2003, 07:01 PM   #30
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*Follows tank*


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-21-2003, 08:16 PM   #31
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*Quickly jumps into another tank and rides off with the Flag of the Spoon Acadamy resting on the entrance of the tank itself.*


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-22-2003, 02:12 AM   #32
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insanesith=red
topshot=light blue

decides to catch a ride with topshot. *jumps in topshots tank*
"hey buddy"
"hello."
"i thought id keep ya company"
"alright, you can watch for more enemies"
"will do"


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-24-2003, 02:58 AM   #33
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Lunatic grows tired of watching from orbit and decides to continue his fight on the ground. He takes an orbital drop pod that blazes through the sky, tearing a hole in the ground. As Lunatic climbs slowly from the crater, he looks pissed. EVER SO PISSED.

He unsheathes his sword and begins the most vicious fight he has ever fought. Hacking, slashing, shooting and shrieking all manner of horrible battlecries. His fury drives him until all around him is destruction and death. He is all that is left. He continues on to find Topshot and InsaneSith wreaking havoc in a hijacked tank. Glancing toward the horizon, he notices an aircraft approaching their position.

"Heads up!" he yells to Topshot and InsaneSith, firing two shots into the aircrafts hull. He strikes the fuel tank squarely, turning the fighter into a spiraling ball of flame that plows through the ground, stopping a few feet from Lunatic in a burning mess. The alien pilot scrambles from the wreckage, reaching desperately for his holstered energy weapon. Before he can even get close to it, he is tossed on his back by a vicious kick from Lunatic.

Lunatic hovers over him, sneering.

"Go ahead, give me one good reason not to blow your brainmeat all over the ground."

The alien remains silent, quivering.

"TOO LATE!" Lunatic fires a pair of rifle rounds into the alien's head, spilling bits of its skull and brain about the immediate vicinity.

Lunatic turns again, seeing another aircraft. Before he can aim and destroy it, it fires a missle straight for the tank housing Topshot and InsaneSith. The tank obviously doesn't have any anti-missle system. Lunatic leaps into the air, drawing his sword, and shears the missles cleanly into two halves. The halves whirl blindly through the sky. One strikes the enemy fighter, blowing it to pieces. The other whirls into a small regiment of aliens, tossing them all into oblivion.

Lunatic hops onto the front of the tank, squatting, rifle at the ready.

"Let's go!" he says to Topshot, driving the tank. "I'll provide covering fire!"

The tank rolls on, tearing everything to bits wherever it goes, with Lunatic sniping aliens that try to attack its vulnerable flanks...


http://linuxsupportdesk.net/pichost/...unaticJed1.gif removed [img] tags due to HTTP 401 response --tk102

"Yes. The pain you feel is your very essence, the essence of the crude animal known as Homo Sapien."

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Old 01-24-2003, 01:46 PM   #34
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goes insane and kills abunch of alien dudes.


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-24-2003, 03:33 PM   #35
jokemaster
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*goes medieval on the Aleins, running over the infantry*


Vader's wife was very pregnant when she died 19 years ago. All of a sudden a 19 year old who is very strong in the force and has a distinct resembalance to him in his younger days rolls in from Vader's home planet with his old Master Obi-Wan (Who was the ONLY other person preset at the time his wife died. And to boot, the kid's last name is Skywalker.

So in answer to your question, he knew Luke was his son because his name is Darth Vader, and not Darth Retard.


-Forum post on why Vader knew Luke was his son.
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Old 01-24-2003, 09:26 PM   #36
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*Goes crazy, super-charges the tank's speed, and they run down every last alien tank standing. Unsheathes a gunblade and starts firing and hacking at all the alien foot soldiers.*


"My name's not 'Adam We'........or is it????"
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Old 01-25-2003, 03:54 AM   #37
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*pulls out dual sabers and attacks the aliens.**slashes the sabers swinging them around and stabs an alien in the head. the cuts off another ones head.**turns around and yells to topshot* topshot we need to get to their base and set up a bomb. and get some signals to guide the dropships.


“This body is not me. I am not caught in this body.
I am life without limit.”
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Old 01-25-2003, 07:25 AM   #38
nova_wolf
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'What the...'

No time to finish that expletive... An explosive banana hits my main foil, not so much breaking it off as vaporising it where it stood!

'Nova Lead - do you require assitance,' inquired the Manta Ray pilot.

'What you think!' Dumb question! 'I'm gonna have to ditch, but the Witch is gonna go in style!'

I spring the canopy in readyness. Opening the tool bay doors drops a rather surprised Flash. I soon follow after him, saber and blaster the only things I can grab.

Salem takes over, and the unwieldy dead weight that was the finest B-Wing in the galaxy crashes into a nearby alien repair yard!

'Beautiful! I scream, ammo and fuel mixing with the Witch's power core to form the mother of all Molotov Cocktails!

'Serves the bastards right.. heh Flash!'

My faithful droid dog loks up at me with a stare tahts vacant even by droid standards.

DAMN IT!

First the White Witch, and now Flash - ahhh... some one's gonna die!



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Old 01-25-2003, 11:01 AM   #39
ckcsaber
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The ground war raging, the swampies fight on.

A small speck at first grows larger and larger. A flaming fireball rushes towards the battlefield, wind screaming by it, as it breaks thru orbit.

As it falls closer, an Alien grunt looks up and notices it, as it falls faster and faster towards the ground. He recognizes it as one of the primitive swampies space ships. He laughs, as he realizies that the ship is as good as gone, but little does he realize its headed straight for him.

Just as the headhunter smashes into the ground, the cockpit blows open, ejecting the passenger away, as the headhunter explodes, engulfing the alien.

A figure garbed in a green coat lies on the ground. He wearily picks up his hat and uses his spear to lever himself off the ground.

"Anybody miss me?"
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Old 01-25-2003, 08:13 PM   #40
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Lunatic receives a message over the comm channel from a captain aboard the flagship of the fleet, the Spizzwizzle.

"Sir, we've got the entire northwestern continent secured. Our ground forces are just mopping up the rest of the alien defenders. We can now commandeer the production facilities to keep ourselves moving all the way to their capital city!"

"Excellent. Do we have sufficient forces to challenge the capital?"

The captain replies, his voice wavering.

"Are you joking? We'd get slaughtered! We're going to need about three weeks to build up the sufficient forces with the facilities we have now. Of course, that could be sped up if we launched an offensive on the southwestern continent. That's their weakest point. We should be able to take them over without much difficulty."

"Alright. Let's see what we can do..."

Lunatic opens up a general comm channel to all the available soldiers.

"I want everybody who's ready to fight to get in the dropships and head for the southwestern continent. I'll contact you when you arrive."

He turns to Topshot and InsaneSith.

"Come on. We'll take the shuttle. We'll be able to sneak in while they're distracted."


http://linuxsupportdesk.net/pichost/...unaticJed1.gif removed [img] tags due to HTTP 401 response --tk102

"Yes. The pain you feel is your very essence, the essence of the crude animal known as Homo Sapien."

-Millions Knives
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